PeachyDoodle Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 We started attending a new church about two years ago. It is a small church but we are an introverted family and so we don't know that many people, beyond the usual pleasantries at Sunday services. There is an older lady who is usually at the service we attend. She is very sweet but I've always had the impression that she might be a little "off." Anyways, not long after we joined the church, she took to calling dh "Darren." This is not his name. We have how idea how she came up with the name, as it's nowhere close to dh's actual name, but it never bothered him, and we just sort of laughed about it. He answers to Darren when she talks to him -- which is every Sunday. She makes a point of saying hello to him. Just him, not me or the kids, although we're usually together. In hindsight, he should have corrected her when it first happened. But it seemed harmless, and she seemed so pleased to see him each week, and he didn't want to embarrass her, and he didn't mind answering to the wrong name. But today as we were leaving service, she brought over her elderly mother, whom we'd never met before. And it took about two seconds for him to realize that they don't just have his name wrong. They think he is someone else altogether! (The old woman going on about how she loves to see people she knew when they were tots pretty much gave it away.) This time he panicked and just sort of laughed and nodded and said it was so good to see them and beat a hasty retreat. So I guess he is going to have to fully assume his identity as Darren now. Which I guess makes me Mrs Darren. And our kids... Darrena and DJ??? I feel like I'm living in a sitcom!!! 😂😂 1 20 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 Is the woman who called your dh Darren in full possession of her faculties? I mean, is she perhaps in early stages of dementia or Alzheimers and is calling other people by various names as well? In that case I would do nothing but roll along with whatever name is "assigned" to me on any given Sunday, be kind and enter her world temporarily. If she is completely coherent but mistook your dh for another person altogether, it may be time to clear things up. He could say something like it took him a while but just now realized that she must have him confused with someone else. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pen Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 I think he should say something. Tell her his correct name, and That he just thought she had his name wrong and that hadn’t mattered to him, so he hadn’t corrected her, but when she introduced him to her mother realized she had him confused for someone else. I think most people would expect that if they talked to “Darren” and were mistaken about the name the correction would be made right away. Replying to Darren in a friendly way probably added to her assumption that she knew him. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garga Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 What a pickle! “Darren” needs to come clean and confess the truth! It’s be awkward, but it needs to be done. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 Besides "coming clean" your church needs name tags! 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arctic Bunny Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 The next time she approaches him, he can say, “oh, Darren isn’t here this week, I’m ____.” She will be completely confused, but at least he can be himself! 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SquirrellyMama Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 (edited) Good luck, I am no help in this situation. I hate correcting people when they get my name wrong. On a side note about the name Darren. A previous neighbor's name is Darren. For some reason I always called him Darwin. I blame it on the show Bewitched. The mil was forever calling Darren different names, pretty sure one was Darwin. Every time I went to say his name I would think of Bewitched and get it wrong. It was so embarrassing. Kelly Edited July 21, 2019 by SquirrellyMama 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MaBelle Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 Bless her heart! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MaBelle Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 5 hours ago, arctic_bunny said: The next time she approaches him, he can say, “oh, Darren isn’t here this week, I’m ____.” She will be completely confused, but at least he can be himself! She'll think they're twins. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arctic Bunny Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 4 hours ago, MaBelle said: She'll think they're twins. Imagine if Darren actually appears one Sunday! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Storygirl Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 I let an older lady in my Bible study call me "Mary" for a pretty long time. My name is not Mary! The first time or two, I just thought that she had made a mistake and would figure it out, when she heard me referred to by my real name. But time went on, and I remained Mary. This went on for a long time. Probably months. Finally, I just said, "I hate to tell you this, because you are so sweet, and I don't want to hurt your feelings, but you have my name wrong." It was awkward, but she laughed it off. She kept joking about it for a few more weeks, while I would have preferred that she not do, because I felt badly each time. But I decided that I couldn't let it go on, and I just told her. I wish I had done it sooner. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmseB Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 I would just say, "I realized after church last week when you introduced me to your mom that you think I'm someone else! So awkward I haven't noticed before, but my name is so-and-so. Sorry for the misunderstanding!" 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pen Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 13 minutes ago, EmseB said: I would just say, "I realized after church last week when you introduced me to your mom that you think I'm someone else! So awkward I haven't noticed before, but my name is so-and-so. Sorry for the misunderstanding!" Perfect! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arctic Bunny Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 2 hours ago, EmseB said: I would just say, "I realized after church last week when you introduced me to your mom that you think I'm someone else! So awkward I haven't noticed before, but my name is so-and-so. Sorry for the misunderstanding!" Well, if you’re going to be all sensible and helpful... 😛 ... yes, that is perfect. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moonflower Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 I think I'm abnormally non-confrontational; I'd just quit going to that church, like, forever. 3 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LMD Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 1 hour ago, moonflower said: I think I'm abnormally non-confrontational; I'd just quit going to that church, like, forever. 😄 Fake 'Darren's' death, then marry his twin? I might just start pointedly calling dh by his name in front of her... 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 An elderly lady in my congregation started calling me Karen a couple of years after we moved here. She rarely attends so I just let it go. One day she started calling me by my real name again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
school17777 Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 If I learned I was calling someone the wrong name, I would probably not remember their real name because once I have a name associated with a person, I have a hard time changing it in my head. So, I’d avoid using a name around him! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SquirrellyMama Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 8 hours ago, moonflower said: I think I'm abnormally non-confrontational; I'd just quit going to that church, like, forever. Me too! Kelly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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