4 year old, Relax or nip this in the bud?

[warriormom]

My daughter is adorable and very curious (sounds like the beginning of Curious George). She is 4 years old. She has always "gotten into everything." I kept telling myself that she would grow out of this, but I am thinking this might be here to stay. Her fine motor skills are really weak probably because I did not give her markers, paint or crayons because it would end up everywhere. Now I am really concerned about her fine motor skills. I give her a tray filled with washable markers, stickers, washable glitter glue, scissors, glue stick, paper of different colors and tell her to have fun. I do set some ground rules: 1. no cutting hair or clothes 2. Do not color yourself or your clothing 3. Do not color the table. She has violated every time 1 of these no-nos since I started the craft tray. I am pretty frustrated. Normally I would take the supplies away since she misused them, but she needs the fine motor practice. She refuses to color or do anything academic.

 

Should I nip this in the bud or relax...she's only four...the preschool years need to be messy? I am concerned enough about fine motor skills that I am considering getting her evaluated for dysgraphia. ADVICE PLEASE :tongue_smilie:

[AK_Mom4]

DD11 still tends to color on herself when she uses markers. Does that help?

 

We survived this by restricting the use of scissors (since they made irrevocable changes!) and making sure all markers were washable. When she wrote on the table, I handed her the wet cloth and made her clean it up. Gradually she got more neat. Sort of.....

[Jean in Newcastle]

Are you sitting down with her when you give her the tray? I'd sit down with her and make my own art too. If she picks up her scissors to cut her hair or clothes, nip it in the bud right there. Same for the other behaviors.

[QueenCat]

I agree with the others... sit with her while crafting. When I taught preschool, my assistant sat at the craft table when it was open, guiding the kids. I also agree that these activities are necessary for both fine motor skills and encouraging creativity.

[LibraryLover]

What do you mean by 'behind'? IS it that she can't/doesn't want to hold a pencil well? Unless there are other issues, I would say that sounds pretty normal for a 4 yr old. Some kids love to write at that age, true. Yet it's not typical to have fab handwriting skills at 4. And not all kids like to color. I loathed coloring books and the like when I was a child, but I liked making paper chains for every occasion. It's not just for Christmas. :)

 

Some ideas: A chalboard easel and chalk (not the fancy kind from Germany- those stain ;)), is excellent fine motor practice and kids love it. Very low maintenance. Playdough , plastic knife and a garlic press is not really messy. Even if there are bits and pieces falling to the floor, they dry quickly and you can sweep them up. It doesn't do lasting damage, not in my experience at least. Same for water colors. She could do that at the easel as well. When my kids were little, I often put the easel & paint outside in the yard. That limits indoor issues. If you do collages, let her tear the paper (this works similar muscles), or you tear the paper or pictures, and give her a fresh gluestick. Put a strainer and spoons and an old pot in the the sandbox.

 

Helping you set the talble is workking those muscles, as is dressing up dolls, or playing with Lego or Playmobil. Balling up socks works too. Look around at your every day life and you will see that pretty much everything involves fine motor. Brushing her teeth, turning the pages of a book, pouring water in and out of cups in the bath , all involve the use of those muscles. Look at her activity through a day outside of academics. You will be surprised by what you see.

 

Sit with her inside as she works, bring very messy paints and such outside on the grass. (If that is available to you.)

Edited September 14, 2012 by LibraryLover

[QueenCat]

One more thing..... a variety of activities is important to use the full range of muscles in the hand, lower arm, to develop fine motor skills. Cutting using different muscles than painting, for example.

[Tohru]

Do you sit with her? If you're just putting her in front of all that stuff and saying "have fun", how can you expect her not to??

I'd sit with her and occasionally have specific things to do, not just a free-for-all at the craft table! If you can't watch her, then remove the scissors until you can be with her. She's only 4. This is the age for exploration, and you said everything else is washable.

 

:iagree:

 

It helps to have a point of the craft time. And only give her one thing at a time - One day, color with crayons on paper. Next time, just cut paper. Another day, do stickers. Or color all week and the next week cut paper everyday, etc.

 

If you simply can't sit with her - Band-aids are great for fine motor skills. Give her a box of character Band-aids and let her open them, peel and stick them to paper, stuffed animals, or even herself. This will keep her busy for at least 30 minutes.

 

 

ETA: Giving her a ton of things at once can be extremely overwhelming and might really be the only problem....My 4yo daughter gets 4 crayon colors and is very happy to color. If I give her more than that, she gets overwhelmed and will start peeling the paper off of them, coloring on the wall or table, or even breaks them. She has a huge bin of crayons, we just take 4 colors out randomly when it's craft time.

Edited September 14, 2012 by jadedone80

[deacongirl]

Montessori inspired fine motor activities are great and work wonders. Just google.

[QueenCat]

:iagree:

 

It helps to have a point of the craft time. And only give her one thing at a time - One day, color with crayons on paper. Next time, just cut paper. Another day, do stickers. Or color all week and the next week cut paper everyday, etc.

 

If you simply can't sit with her - Band-aids are great for fine motor skills. Give her a box of character Band-aids and let her open them, peel and stick them to paper, stuffed animals, or even herself. This will keep her busy for at least 30 minutes.

 

 

Band aid idea is cute but I disagree on the one at a time thing. That inhibits creativity. This is a prime age to encourage creativity via fine motor activities. Options are a good thing.

[The Girls' Mom]

When mine were little, this is what I did:

 

I had a little tykes plastic table that they did most of their messy stuff on. It sat in the kitchen. (You could also just keep a vinyl table cloth on hand for your kitchen table)

 

I removed clothing down to undies when using messy craft items. They were allowed to get it all over them. (That's part of the fun, IMHO)

 

I only allowed scissors when supervised. (because, yes they WILL cut hair)

 

A clean, but messy activity is to tint shaving cream with food coloring and let them "paint" in the tub. It all rinses right down the drain.

[Tohru]

Band aid idea is cute but I disagree on the one at a time thing. That inhibits creativity. This is a prime age to encourage creativity via fine motor activities. Options are a good thing.

 

It may inhibit creativity initially, but it might solve the OP's problem until her dd can learn to use materials appropriately. What she's doing now is obviously not working.

[celticmom]

Kumon has some graduated workbooks with coloring and cutting skills practice that may help. They are also fun, dd7 would probably still do them if I would buy her one.

[QueenCat]

It may inhibit creativity initially, but it might solve the OP's problem until her dd can learn to use materials appropriately. What she's doing now is obviously not working.

 

Aah, but sitting with the child while she uses the materials, would eliminate the misuse issues. There can be long term issues when a child does not get their creative juices flowing at a young age, as well as fine motor issues...

[Amy in NH]

I give her a tray filled with washable markers, stickers, washable glitter glue, scissors, glue stick, paper of different colors and tell her to have fun. I do set some ground rules: 1. no cutting hair or clothes 2. Do not color yourself or your clothing 3. Do not color the table. She has violated every time 1 of these no-nos since I started the craft tray. I am pretty frustrated. Normally I would take the supplies away since she misused them, but she needs the fine motor practice. She refuses to color or do anything academic.

 

Should I nip this in the bud or relax...she's only four...the preschool years need to be messy? I am concerned enough about fine motor skills that I am considering getting her evaluated for dysgraphia. ADVICE PLEASE :tongue_smilie:

 

If she doesn't have experience using these items, you should not leave her alone with them, especially if you are concerned about her ability to follow the rules. If you are concerned about her fine-motor skills, you should be sitting right next to her showing her the proper way to hold them and use them, otherwise she will be practicing incorrect pencil grip, etc.

 

Supervise and be involved. Model.

[myfunnybunch]

Band aid idea is cute but I disagree on the one at a time thing. That inhibits creativity. This is a prime age to encourage creativity via fine motor activities. Options are a good thing.

 

Options are good once the child knows what to do.

 

Perhaps combining the two approaches would give the child the best of both worlds. One activity at a time at first, to teach and to keep the child from being overwhelmed. Many unknowns can be confusing or overwhelming for some children.

 

Once the child knows how to use the scissors properly and comfortably, how to use the markers properly, how to use the glue to stick down bits of paper, then start combining materials and activities and offering more choice. It's much easier to foster creativity once the child knows what to do with the materials. :)

 

I think of it like cooking: If someone placed a tray with a bunch of completely unfamiliar foods on it in front of me, I'm sure I could be "creative" with them, but I have a much better idea how to create something interesting and edible if I have at least a basic understanding of each food.

 

Cat

[QueenCat]

Options are good once the child knows what to do.

 

Perhaps combining the two approaches would give the child the best of both worlds. One activity at a time at first, to teach and to keep the child from being overwhelmed. Many unknowns can be confusing or overwhelming for some children.

 

Once the child knows how to use the scissors properly and comfortably, how to use the markers properly, how to use the glue to stick down bits of paper, then start combining materials and activities and offering more choice. It's much easier to foster creativity once the child knows what to do with the materials. :)

 

I think of it like cooking: If someone placed a tray with a bunch of completely unfamiliar foods on it in front of me, I'm sure I could be "creative" with them, but I have a much better idea how to create something interesting and edible if I have at least a basic understanding of each food.

 

Cat

 

I can agree with the above... Spend a short time on basic skills but then have more options to encourage the creativity.

[MomatHWTK]

I don't let the kids have the scissors until they learn not to cut their clothes or hair. Though I know two of mine have cut clothes at least once- they just have to experience it. LOL!

 

My kitchen table has paint and marker residue all over it. One of my walls has permanent ink (DD left out a Sharpie and the 2 y.o. got it). DD almost always has some ink on her somewhere, as does the 2 year old.

 

But, my walls are covered with DD's artwork and the 2 y.o.'s motor skills are moving right along. ;)

 

You'll have to decide where your line in the sand is. I tried caring about markers on clothes and paper all over the floor with the first few kids, but I really just don't. My line would be at the scissors. I do limit painting just because it's a hassle for me to clean up and it takes a lot of room to let 2 or more kids paint at once. :)

 

The first set of Mike's Imagination Station DVDs great at giving instruction on using various art supplies, btw.

[Susan in KY]

My dd didn't grow into her fine motor skills until age 7. I'm happy to say, she now knows how to color, cut, paste, and cross stitch. Her hand writing is pretty. My advice is to go with the path of least annoyance. The crafts come out when you have time to sit with her and they get put up afterwards. :)

[Joanne]

My daughter is adorable and very curious (sounds like the beginning of Curious George). She is 4 years old. She has always "gotten into everything." I kept telling myself that she would grow out of this, but I am thinking this might be here to stay. Her fine motor skills are really weak probably because I did not give her markers, paint or crayons because it would end up everywhere. Now I am really concerned about her fine motor skills. I give her a tray filled with washable markers, stickers, washable glitter glue, scissors, glue stick, paper of different colors and tell her to have fun. I do set some ground rules: 1. no cutting hair or clothes 2. Do not color yourself or your clothing 3. Do not color the table. She has violated every time 1 of these no-nos since I started the craft tray. I am pretty frustrated. Normally I would take the supplies away since she misused them, but she needs the fine motor practice. She refuses to color or do anything academic.

 

Should I nip this in the bud or relax...she's only four...the preschool years need to be messy? I am concerned enough about fine motor skills that I am considering getting her evaluated for dysgraphia. ADVICE PLEASE :tongue_smilie:

 

I think you are setting both of you up for frustration.

 

I would consider only using washable markers for a while, and not stressing at all if she colors on herself. I would use newspaper or butcher paper underneath the crafting.

 

There are some kids who need to have limited, supervised access *only* to these materials well past her age.

 

Beading is good for fine motor development, btw.

[Unicorn.]

If you don't let her color on herself or the walls, you aren't going to have any good stories to tease her about when she's older. :lol: btw, my 14 yo dd still gets caught drawing on herself w/ markers

 

Give her some play dough, and those crappy play dough scissors, and let her cut dough! Cleaning up her messes will also help develop motor skills. Scrub, scrub, scrub = strong hands. :D

[swellmomma]

The best way to make sure she learns to use the items properly and follows the rules is to sit right by her at all times that she is using those things.

 

As for other ways to practice fine motor skills you can do lacing boards and beads, legos, puzzles etc, these all improve those skills. Use sidewalk chalk outside etc.

 

Your dd is not going to learn to use the tools you have given her properly if all you do is hand them to her with a list of rules. Sit next to her and guide her gently with reminders of proper usage. SHe is 4, she should not be handed scissors, glue and markers without proper supervision imo.

[Mrs Mungo]

I think you should model what to do before just handing her a tray of craft goodies. Give her some ideas. Work on some specific projects together. Make one project a day for a couple of months. Supervise and work with her. She will be ready to come up with her own projects soon enough.

 

Think of it this way, if someone handed you yarn and a set of knitting needles (and you don't know how to knit), then you would get frustrated pretty quickly, right? You need someone to teach you how to use them. You would start off making simple things from patterns. Eventually, you would learn to just do your own thing, but that is not where you start.

 

Eta: I think you might need some direction as well? You might try the book "Montessori at Home" or "Montessori Play and Learn" or even the Enchanted Learning website for ideas.

 

I don't think this is an obedience issue at *all*.

 

Before my kids learned to color in the lines, I had them trace shapes and draw lines within the shape, edge to edge. That is a Montessori idea and the thing that helped my kids *see* those borders.

Edited September 14, 2012 by Mrs Mungo