HeatherL Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 My DS (5) is friends with all girls. Some he has known for years and is very close to. There is one who he gets along with really well. They make each other crafts that we take back and forth, they talk about getting married. Her mom says she always asks if my son can come over and play and vice versa. She came to his birthday party in March, her birthday was last week. Do you see where this is going? Her mom and I are facebook friends. Last Friday she invited us over to play, but we couldn't since it's enrichment class day. She said her daughter was really hoping we could visit, but she understood and we would plan another day. Fast forward a few days and I see her posting about planning her birthday party. At this point my feelings are a little hurt, but I figure it's an all girl party (we've already been excluded from one of those from another friend, which is silly though, cause they now my son and he is all game for throwing on a princess dress and joining in the fun!), but whatever, I try to understand that. Well she just posted pictures of the birthday party and it's huge! With tons of boys and girls!! I am hurt! I am mad! I posted a snide comment on the photo post that said how much my son would have loved to be there to help her celebrate had we been invited. She quickly responded with, oh the list got too big and they talked about inviting my son, but he just didn't make the cut, she hopes no hard feelings. He's 5! Of course he's going to be hurt when/if he finds out. I won't bring it up to him, but if they ever play agian, it's bound to come up (becuase they also play a lot in a group and EVERY ONE else from this group of friends is in the picure!) That's why I think her excuse is a lie! and size? The party was already huge and there were kids there that were mom's friends' kids, not her daughter's. I am just so mad and sad and hurt! Thanks for listening. I just needed to vent. My DH is sleeping and I'm sitting on the computer crying. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jpoy85 Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 :grouphug: Id be mad too. Maybe talk it over if she is a good friend (rather than a play date fellow mom) and if not, then id personally pray and move on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: What a horribly petty woman -- sounds like she was still mad because you couldn't get together when she wanted to. :glare: It never ceases to amaze me how cruel some moms can be toward other people's kids. I mean, your ds is 5, for crying out loud. :angry: I would be sad and mad, too! "He didn't make the cut, but she hopes there are no hard feelings???" Oh. Yeah. Right. Like there wouldn't be MAJOR HARD FEELINGS over "not making the cut!" What kind of an idiot does she take you for? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wy_kid_wrangler04 Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Audrey Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 That is one craptacular "friend" you have there. :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cindergretta Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 I hate birthday parties. :( They seem to bring nothing but drama and hurt feelings and ill will. :glare: I'm sorry your family is now in the midst of it all. :grouphug: (I used to try to do them for several years for my dc but now it is all family and close close friends who are the same as family. And I can count on one hand how many my dc have been invited to in their entire lives between all 6 of them. ::sigh:: To heck with all that madness. The corker was several years ago when my sweet oldest dd invited about a dozen "friends" to her party and we got maybe 6 RSVPs saying they couldn't come. We didn't hear from anyone else. My poor child sat and waited for anyone to show up and no one did. My heart broke in half that day and I swore we would never do that again. I am crying again over that just typing about it.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bear23 Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 I hate birthday parties. :( They seem to bring nothing but drama and hurt feelings and ill will. :glare: AGREE Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anne in CA Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 All I can say is, that really sucks. I'm sorry. I absolutely would avoid her at all cost from this moment on, including removing her from my fb.:grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnTheBrink Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 Want me to kick her butt? I'm just in the mood. :boxing_smiley: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Refined by Silver Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 I hate them too! Even my own which I had at the beginning of he month, but I won't go there. My dd hasn't been invited to any since she was in public school. She's now 12 and she was 7 then. Not even to her cousin's that is the same age as her. :glare: She got invited when she was in public school, but not any more. Last year she talked about her cousin's bday party because they were talking about it at a family wedding. I tried to play it off and tell her I didn't think she was having a for friends one. I know this year she had one because I saw her mom post about it on fb. It makes me mad, but mostly sad for my kids. I don't even have fb. I look on my mom's occassionaly. I hate fb too! My ds has never been to a child's party except for a relatives. His bday is actually next week and I am dreading it. He was recently looking on a website and I didn't realize that people could upload things on the site. It was nothing inappropriate, but it was of a 8 year old's bday party. The theme was the same as this site. These people had this elaborate birthday party for this boy with tons of friends and it was all themed out with his favorite characters. He asked about having a cake like that, but I really think it was the party he wanted. It just made me sad. Anyway, sorry for the long post. Just venting a bit myself. Not trying to take over your thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tex-mex Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 All I can say is, that really sucks. I'm sorry. I absolutely would avoid her at all cost from this moment on, including removing her from my fb. :iagree::iagree: OP, if it helps... this also happened to my ds when he was that age. Now he is 17 and cannot even recall the friend from years ago. To him, it doesn't matter. To us "Mama Bears", it means a lot. I learned to pull back from the mean mom and not let her actions affect me. I hope this helps. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dolphin Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 :iagree::iagree: OP, if it helps... this also happened to my ds when he was that age. Now he is 17 and cannot even recall the friend from years ago. To him, it doesn't matter. To us "Mama Bears", it means a lot. I learned to pull back from the mean mom and not let her actions affect me. I hope this helps. :grouphug: :iagree::iagree: :grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IsabelC Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 OP, if it helps... this also happened to my ds when he was that age. Now he is 17 and cannot even recall the friend from years ago. To him, it doesn't matter. To us "Mama Bears", it means a lot. I learned to pull back from the mean mom and not let her actions affect me. I hope this helps. :grouphug: :iagree: It's often far more hurtful for us mamas than for the kids. But I still feel like slapping that woman for you. Same with Cindergretta's dd's mean "friends" (where is that slap-upside-the-head emoticon when you need it?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 I hate birthday parties. :( They seem to bring nothing but drama and hurt feelings and ill will. :glare: Ugh after reading stories here, I agree. I would be hurt for your ds too. Sounds like mom wanted a party. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lailasmum Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 Wow it seems so strange for your ds to be left out of that party. Especially as the kids are so close. It does seem like a petty thing to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Rain Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 All I can say is, that really sucks. I'm sorry. I absolutely would avoid her at all cost from this moment on, including removing her from my fb.:grouphug::grouphug: :iagree: The line about not making the cut was pretty cold. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jrn Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kesmom Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 That's awful for your son. That said, I wouldn't have made that comment on her FB. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest submarines Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 Wow it seems so strange for your ds to be left out of that party. Especially as the kids are so close. It does seem like a petty thing to do. :iagree: Could it be that the other kids were all cousins and other family members, and they really didn't have space? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
labst60 Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 This is one of the reasons that I dont' post the kids bday party pics on facebook. You just can't invite EVERYONE (not saying OPs son shouldn't have made the cut) and why would you post pics showing "friends" you didn't invite a party with "friends" you did? That being said.... when my little ones were younger, I dictated the guest list and it was often MY friends with their families - it kept it easer, kwim? This little girl might adore your son... but Mom picked her friends and their families. Or maybe the little girl is the kind of little girl that adores just about everyone she plays with (I have one of those kids). She genuinely loves playing with them at the time - but at the end of the day, there are kids that she would rather pick to play with - but to a more reserved child - they think she is their bff. (I've talked with her about it!) I think the real problem is pubicizing the party in a way that could hurt people's feelings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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