s/o olders missing out on stuff because of the youngers

[razorbackmama]

We don't have the grandma issue (because the grandparents live too far away), but just in general, I think my olders miss out on stuff because of my youngers. I'm a solo parent for the most part, so it's me or no one to take my olders to things. And since I'm nursing the baby, it's not like I can take the olders and leave the youngers with a friend.

 

We don't even go on family vacations...literally...my oldest is 15 and we have never gone on a vacation, even a small one...because my husband doesn't want to until everyone is "old enough to appreciate it." There are 14.5 years between my oldest and my youngest...by the time the youngest (assuming she's my last, which we can't do) is "old enough," my oldest will be gone.

 

I DO try to take all my kids to fun stuff, and I try to find things that they will all enjoy, but let's face it...there are some things that appeal more to littles and other things that appeal more to bigs. I feel like my olders have to suck it up far too much and put up with little kid activities, simply because there's not enough me to go around and because my husband isn't willing.

 

Those of you with big families, or those of you from big families...how are/were these issues handled in your family?

[razorbackmama]

For regularly occurring activities (Taekwon-Do, for example), it's like that. My current 5yo started TKD when she was 4 simply because we were already there. When my olders were that age, TKD wasn't even a blip on the radar LOL!

 

I don't drag every kid to every other kid's activity, but I do insist that they make the big stuff. And I allow ds to read during gymnastics meets... :D

Yeah, every kid isn't required to come to each class, but big events, yes. Now to get my husband to come....

 

What I'm talking more though is special, non-recurring activities. Particular field trips, other special activities (say, a major league baseball game...not all the time, but maybe ONCE, ya know? Or an amusement park), etc. I mentioned vacations above. My kids have gotten to do things like that, but with other families without little kids who have invited them along. I hate that the special memories doing stuff like that are not with our family.

[Melinda in VT]

Can you discuss this with your husband? Is his reluctance money? The logistics of going somewhere with a family that size? Or is it the age of the younger kids and feeling like they won't enjoy it?

 

If it's the last one--you need to just badger him until he relents. ;) I can't offer much help with the other two. I only have four kids so I can't pretend to give you advice.

[happypamama]

Sometimes we bring the littles along. Sometimes DH takes the big kids to do something without me and the little(s) -- it's kind of a big deal when you're Old Enough to go off on an adventure with Daddy but not Mommy. If we could afford to do so, we'd take a vacation and just bring the little ones along. . . I lugged DS2 around Williamsburg when he was almost 1 and almost 2, so that the big kids could participate in the homeschool days there.

 

I'm the oldest of four kids, with almost 9 years between myself and the youngest (my sister). Sometimes my sister got dragged along to things for the older three of us, and sometimes I was asked to bring a book or otherwise be patient so the younger three could enjoy an activity. It just works out that way.

 

Also, with things like amusement parks, we went to more kid-oriented places like Sesame Place a few times, but we didn't go to things like Busch Gardens until I was a teenager, but by then, I was able to go off with my brothers or then-boyfriend to ride coasters while my sister rode the younger rides. But then once I was grown and married, I think my parents continued to go with my younger brother and my sister for a while. I got the privilege of doing things first, but my sister got the benefit of more experienced parents who let her do things at younger ages than I was allowed to do them. With our family, we went to Hersheypark a few years ago, but only DH and I could ride most of the coasters (DD could ride a couple); this year, the boys can't ride enough to make it worth the money, but DD can ride all of them, so DH took just DD, and they had a special day together. (Being the oldest child, the only girl, and the oldest grandchild on both sides has worked out well for DD, haha.)

Edited September 7, 2012 by happypamama

[2squared]

Yes, both olders and youngers miss out on things. My age gap is only 8.5 years, but I definitely have kids in very different developmental spots. We divide and conquer a lot. One of us takes a group on an outing....anything from shopping to swimming to plays....while the other stays home with the rest of the kids. During work hours, though, I have all of them.

 

I use the public school for field trips too. My school aged kids go on all the public school field trips while I stay home with the littles. This has worked out very, very well for us.

 

ETA: I take the kids on vacation by myself every summer. We travel back to my home state and explore sights along the way. The kids love it. Our destination is 9 hours away, and we spend a total of one week away from home. We cram ourselves into one hotel room (with permission), and I do it all - driving, bedtime, swimming pool, whatever.

Edited September 7, 2012 by 2squared

[MeaganS]

I don't know. I was the oldest of 6 kids. My youngest two siblings are still home and there is a 12 year difference between me and my youngest brother. While my family has been able to do stuff they didn't do while I was home, we still did plenty that I don't feel like there is a problem. My parents didn't have as much money when I was young as they do now, but we still took family car trips and camping trips. My parents, bless their souls, once took our entire family on a day trip to NYC at Christmastime to see all the sites when I was 14. Sometimes my mom would stay home with the youngers on trips and my dad would take the olders to do fun things (like Disneyworld) or sometimes the youngers would get dragged along. I don't feel like I was neglected, though.

 

Now my family goes on ski trips at Christmas and flies places and stays in hotels (we always drove and camped). But my mom has more time for my kids now as the only grandbabies than she will when she has 20 grandkids. It's a payoff

 

My husband is also the oldest of 6, and we talk about this a lot. There are definitely some payoffs and some sacrifices depending on where kids are in the lineup. Dh drove a crappy car in high school and his parents bought his littlest sister a nice SUV to drive when she was in high school. But we have been given a lot of their furniture as they've bought new stuff or been given great deals on the cars they don't need anymore (our minivan, for example). His younger siblings won't really have that opportunity. It would be easy to get jealous, but we both try not to. Our parents loved us and did what they could for us when we were home and love their grandkids and do what they can for them now.

 

Last Christmas, my mom bought my girls a really nice play kitchen. When I said that it was too much money, she told me that she has that money to spend now and didn't when I was little. My younger siblings have been able to enjoy it, and now I can too, for my girls. It works out, you know? Not that they're rich or anything, it's just not as tight as it was when there were 6 of us and my dad was getting laid off every few years.

 

I guess that's the kid's perspective. I don't think life shouldn't happen because there is a baby around. So they won't remember it? Oh well, they'll have their own experiences. In a large family like that, there are actually several versions of the family. There's the version that the oldest will remember, with chaos and lots of little kids. There's also the version the youngest will remember, with all their big siblings moving away and getting married and nieces and nephews. And there's everything in between.

Edited September 7, 2012 by MeaganS

[Trish]

If you don't vacation for monetary reasons, that's understandable, you need to do something you can afford. But as far as waiting for the youngest to be old enough to "appreciate it" :confused:

 

Why do they have to appreciate it? You feed them when they're too young to appreciate it. In our case we take them to church when they're too young to appreciate it. Is he worried that there will be some sort of wasted admission fee or something? At really young ages children tend to be (I hate to put it this way) baggage -- not an unpleasant burden, but you need to manage them. However there is no rule or law that says they need to "appreciate" anything! I mean, you might take great grandma even if she's too senile to 'appreciate it' -- so what? Just enjoy having family with you and appreciate THEM.

[happypamama]

But my mom has more time for my kids now as the only grandbabies than she will when she has 20 grandkids. It's a payoff

 

Our parents loved us and did what they could for us when we were home and love their grandkids and do what they can for them now.

 

 

So very true. My oldest child will also have had a decade more with DH and me, and with her grandparents, than my youngest child. I was struck by Elizabeth Foss's comment on her blog (ebeth.typepad.com) that her oldest child will have 20 years more with her than her youngest. But her youngest has so many older siblings to love on her. So they all get different opportunities and benefits.

[razorbackmama]

If you don't vacation for monetary reasons, that's understandable, you need to do something you can afford. But as far as waiting for the youngest to be old enough to "appreciate it" :confused:

Money isn't necessarily the issue. I mean, yeah, it's as expensive as all get out, but we could save up for something we really wanted to know, KWIM? And actually I think we'd all be happy doing something that didn't cost a lot.

 

I think it's mostly the hassle.:confused:

 

Why do they have to appreciate it? You feed them when they're too young to appreciate it. In our case we take them to church when they're too young to appreciate it. Is he worried that there will be some sort of wasted admission fee or something? At really young ages children tend to be (I hate to put it this way) baggage -- not an unpleasant burden, but you need to manage them. However there is no rule or law that says they need to "appreciate" anything! I mean, you might take great grandma even if she's too senile to 'appreciate it' -- so what? Just enjoy having family with you and appreciate THEM.

Thank you. My thoughts exactly. I really do not understand his POV at all. But he is very much whatever is convenient for him...if something that is a hassle is voluntary, it just doesn't happen due to it being inconvenient. (I hate that word!)

 

I've actually been thinking about starting to go tent camping with the kids. I will plan on going by myself since dh is concerned about bears, but if he wants to join us, it will be a bonus (provided he's not cranky about going!). But I'm tired of NOT doing stuff with them simply because he's unwilling.

 

I haven't quite figured out how to navigate things that typically we would divide and conquer with, since it's just me (amusement parks, for example). But maybe I could go with another solo mom sometime?????

[mom2scouts]

We have a big age gap between our youngest and oldest. The little ones have been dragged along to older sibling activities since they were born.

[MomatHWTK]

I think a lot of how you feel will depend on what you consider "missing out." The kids have a life, it's the one you are living. Anything you do is part of that. Stuff you don't do is just stuff you don't do, it's not necessarily missing out. KWIM?

[razorbackmama]

I think a lot of how you feel will depend on what you consider "missing out." The kids have a life, it's the one you are living. Anything you do is part of that. Stuff you don't do is just stuff you don't do, it's not necessarily missing out. KWIM?

Very true, and an important reminder. Although I do feel badly that anything outside of "survival" that they do is with other families rather than ours.:glare:

[MedicMom]

There were 16.5 years between me and my youngest sibling. If it wasnt something the little kids could be dragged to, we didn't do it. Amusement parks, movies, vacations, extended lessons auch as dance, just didn't happen.

 

This was a huge factor in choosing to have my kids two years apart and greatly limit my family size.

[Anne]

I've actually been thinking about starting to go tent camping with the kids. I will plan on going by myself since dh is concerned about bears, but if he wants to join us, it will be a bonus (provided he's not cranky about going!). But I'm tired of NOT doing stuff with them simply because he's unwilling.

 

I haven't quite figured out how to navigate things that typically we would divide and conquer with, since it's just me (amusement parks, for example). But maybe I could go with another solo mom sometime?????

 

This sounds like a great idea! And it looks as if you've got a couple of older teenage boys - they would probably get a big kick out of "being the men" on an outdoor adventure!

 

It is too bad that your dh doesn't want to do something like this - but don't sit there and be resentful - if you want to make memories, do it!!! :auto::auto: Maybe sit down and brainstorm with your olders what kind of adventures they'd like to have - if they're on board, it will be much easier for you to make it happen on your own!

 

:grouphug:

 

Anne

[Ottakee]

We only have 7 1/2 years between ds and the girls. At times dh will take ds and do things---they have taken trips out west twice without us. I have taken the girls and done younger things without dh and ds.

 

How about a vacation--even just 1-2 nights at an indoor water park where the olders can enjoy the bigger stuff and the littles the kiddie splash zone? I would try to do something though if dh is agreeable as soon the time to do stuff with the olders will be gone. My dh is BIG on the song "We'll have a good time then".......about how the dad never had time to do anything with the kids when they were growing up and in the later years his son never had time to spend with the dad who was now lonely. He makes sure he spends time with the kids and we do things together.

 

I was a child that missed out on a lot as my mom was a single parent and I was the oldest and the youngest was 9 years younger. I missed out as she couldn't/didn't drive me places to meet with friends/go to activies. I missed on camps, etc. as there just wasn't money when we were all 4 home. I really do regret not being able to ever go to camp, some trips with the youth group, etc.

 

If you can afford it and have someone trustworthy, it would be OK to take the olders away overnight for a weekend or something and leave the little ones home once you are done nursing.

[bettyandbob]

do you go to a state park and set up a tent? A vacation doesn't have to a big to do for someone to "appreciate" like scuba diving in Hawaii or WDW. It's about family time together.

 

My family has a lot of special issues and not a whole lot of financial wiggle room, but we've still done a few things together. We've also done somethings as a partial group (dad and son, mom and youngers, etc). When my dc move I hope they have some memories of doing stuff with us.

[razorbackmama]

There were 16.5 years between me and my youngest sibling. If it wasnt something the little kids could be dragged to, we didn't do it. Amusement parks, movies, vacations, extended lessons auch as dance, just didn't happen.

 

This was a huge factor in choosing to have my kids two years apart and greatly limit my family size.

Yep, this is exactly what I don't want to happen with my kids. I would love for them to look back and not have any regrets about how our family operated

 

if you want to make memories, do it!!! :auto::auto:

That's why I'm starting.:D

 

Maybe sit down and brainstorm with your olders what kind of adventures they'd like to have - if they're on board, it will be much easier for you to make it happen on your own!

Good idea!

 

I would try to do something though if dh is agreeable as soon the time to do stuff with the olders will be gone.

You are preaching to the choir. This is what I keep telling my dh.

 

My dh is BIG on the song "We'll have a good time then".......about how the dad never had time to do anything with the kids when they were growing up and in the later years his son never had time to spend with the dad who was now lonely.

My dh is big on that too, but from the opposite perspective. That is totally the song to describe our family. Ever seen the movie Hook? Yep, that's us too.

 

I really do regret not being able to ever go to camp, some trips with the youth group, etc.

Yep, just what I want to avoid, especially since it's not even for financial reasons (necessarily).

 

do you go to a state park and set up a tent? A vacation doesn't have to a big to do for someone to "appreciate" like scuba diving in Hawaii or WDW. It's about family time together.

Even small things is what my dh won't do. That's why I fully intend to start.

 

When my dc move I hope they have some memories of doing stuff with us.

:iagree:

 

The only thing we've done is go visit his parents. The kids do enjoy that, but boy oh boy is that so NOT a vacation.:cursing: We've done that twice. Once it was dh taking the older 3 and leaving me home with the younger 3 while I was incredibly pregnant with #7. The second time we all went and while we were there I herniated a disc that required surgery when we got home.:thumbdown: Needless to say...I want to do something actually enjoyable for ALL PARTIES (even me!) for once!;)

[coffeegal]

There were 16.5 years between me and my youngest sibling. If it wasnt something the little kids could be dragged to, we didn't do it. Amusement parks, movies, vacations, extended lessons auch as dance, just didn't happen.

 

:thumbdown: That's rough.

 

There was almost 13 years between me and my youngest sibling and I was encouraged to participate in activities. Mom and Dad didn't show up to regular events, although they made an effort to show up for the major recitals and meets. It's turning into a similar situation with my oldest 3. Thankfully they can walk to most of their activities so the tots and I can be home.

[IsabelC]

Well, we seemed to function the opposite way--the little guys got dragged along to all the olders' stuff!

Yep, same here. Eldest child got taken to mother and baby groups, playgroups, pre-kinder, and a heap of ASD interventions and therapies, while neither of his sisters got any activities before the age of four. There just aren't many things you can take a baby or toddler to if you have a hyperactive, ASD older sibling who has to come with you.

 

Also, because we have 2 years age difference between #1 and #2, but 3 years between #2 and #3 (we originally planned to have them all 2 years apart, but had to change the plan) - we are now in a situation where the elder two are growing out of certain things and I have to keep reminding myself to do little kid stuff for the youngest (eg making playdough).

[Mommyfaithe]

Well, we seemed to function the opposite way--the little guys got dragged along to all the olders' stuff! I've done many a dressage show with one in a stroller and one in a backpack. That's one thing that we got s*cked into--starting with the little guys into activities that I wouldn't have done if the little one was the oldest. I'm thinking mostly of swimming. I would not have had my youngest two in competitive swimming most likely, but as long as we're all sitting there... :D My little guys learned early on what appropriate behavior was for concerts and meets. And I missed a few orchestra concerts because we were out in the hallway. I remember how much fun ds had wearing his Scout uniform to the end of Plebe Year for his older sister. We're a family--we all went. Often, the older ones would just jump in and help out with younger activities. I figured it was good job training for being parents. I don't drag every kid to every other kid's activity, but I do insist that they make the big stuff. And I allow ds to read during gymnastics meets... :D

 

Yep...it worked opposite for us too. My little guys have the tired out, burnt Mamma. I am on the mend now....but for a while there...oy!

 

My older kids got to do everything....from dance to Disney.....sports, arts, museums, concerts....you name it. Babies came along for the ride....

 

Now that it is their turn, I cringe....but I am getting past that by choosing wisely, and remembering to take care of me too.

[Firestar Academy]

I totally agree with the poster who said ask your olders what they want to do and how much they would be willing to help with youngers.

 

would they be willing to be buddies for a few hours at the water park if they get a few hours by themselves during nap time. Those indoor water park/ hotel places have babysitters who would sit while napping so you could be with the olders near the water.

 

I'm sure your kids are smart and they know that if they don't all pitch in, they won't go anywhere. I bet they are ready to help and go places.

 

I do recommend if you camp get a site with electricity and plug in a microwave. I pre-cook EVERYTHING and just reheat. even burgers. i buy frozen microwavable vegetables. I refuse to 'cook' on my vacations.

 

Robin

[MomatHWTK]

My kids have a few extra needs, but even taking the three olders to something is a bit of a trial. Everyone has to be fed, dressed, fed again, brush teeth, oops I forgot... By the time we get there, "I'm hungry..." I forgot...

 

Maybe it's different without the special needs thrown in and I just don't know what I'm missing? ;)

 

So regardless of ages, I can understand your DH's reluctance to do things. I know some folks are pack up and go, but we aren't. I guess we are just bad at it. Even if I have everything ready- or think I do, it still takes a lot to get us out the door. Often on the return trip, usually right after someone gets car sick (despite our best avoidance efforts) we say, "never again." :001_smile:

 

Perhaps you could negotiate with DH to take a single trip that you think would be worthwhile and feel that you would need the help. Then you could see how it goes and start doing some smaller stuff on your own.

 

I have to say- and again, this may be just me, I would not put camping on my list of first things to try on my own. :tongue_smilie::lol:

[teamturner]

I've actually been thinking about starting to go tent camping with the kids. I will plan on going by myself since dh is concerned about bears, but if he wants to join us, it will be a bonus (provided he's not cranky about going!). But I'm tired of NOT doing stuff with them simply because he's unwilling.

QUOTE]

 

 

Your older sons will be very helpful on a camping trip. You should do it! And my guess is that your dh will want to join you all for the next trip once he hears of all the fun you guys had!

 

Maybe leave the younger two home w/dh. That might be an incentive to join you guys for the next trip as well. ;)

[countrygal]

I think you should go camping! You can even rent cabin's for the weekend or something that have kitchenette's. Buy a few fishing poles, a baby carrier.... hit the lake and the hiking trails. Plan it all out before you tell dh (book it too) and go if he doesn't want to. Then let him know how fun it was! Maybe he'll then want to come the next time :001_smile:

[razorbackmama]

I totally agree with the poster who said ask your olders what they want to do and how much they would be willing to help with youngers.

 

would they be willing to be buddies for a few hours at the water park if they get a few hours by themselves during nap time. Those indoor water park/ hotel places have babysitters who would sit while napping so you could be with the olders near the water.

I only have 1 that would nap at some place like that, and honestly I doubt she would actually nap. She'd just scream instead.

 

I do recommend if you camp get a site with electricity and plug in a microwave. I pre-cook EVERYTHING and just reheat. even burgers. i buy frozen microwavable vegetables. I refuse to 'cook' on my vacations.

What an interesting idea! Do you bring your regular microwave? Or do you have a small one that you bought just for camping?

 

Your older sons will be very helpful on a camping trip. You should do it! And my guess is that your dh will want to join you all for the next trip once he hears of all the fun you guys had!

:lol: Nah. He'll thoroughly enjoy his weekend alone.

 

Maybe leave the younger two home w/dh. That might be an incentive to join you guys for the next trip as well. ;)

Now THAT is an IDEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:lol::lol::lol:

[Trish]

There were 16.5 years between me and my youngest sibling. If it wasnt something the little kids could be dragged to, we didn't do it. Amusement parks, movies, vacations, extended lessons auch as dance, just didn't happen.

 

This was a huge factor in choosing to have my kids two years apart and greatly limit my family size.

 

There's 14 years between me and my youngest sib (6 kids total), and we still did all that stuff. Cheap vacations, yes, but we did them.

[cathmom]

Honestly I have to say that this is one reason my younger children are all in school or preschool now...I no longer felt that it was right to sacrifice my older children's lives for the younger ones. But my situation is a little different, plus we are done having children and are looking forward to life with just children older than 5 or so.

[Firestar Academy]

I only have 1 that would nap at some place like that, and honestly I doubt she would actually nap. She'd just scream instead.

 

What an interesting idea! Do you bring your regular microwave? Or do you have a small one that you bought just for camping?

:

 

then you could institute a quiet hour or 2 where they can't leave the room and must read quietly.

 

we used a small one and sat it on top of a mini-fridge. now we have an RV but the rules are the same. i freezer cook (when I cook) and bring camping, lasagna, quiche, stew and the traditional dogs and burgers. all must be microwavable. I do not cook or clean pans on vacation. we just did disney that way and people were so jealous on the bus back to the campground when we were deciding between lasagna and stuffed cabbage. and also, this way, everyone can have what they want.

 

robin

[razorbackmama]

then you could institute a quiet hour or 2 where they can't leave the room and must read quietly.

LOL I totally missed the whole "hotel" part of your earlier post. I was imagining one of those water park places with my 2yo on a lounge chair, my 10mo in a stroller, with some teeny-bopper sitting with them while they "napped". Hence why I said it would so not fly.:lol::lol::lol:

[IsabelC]

LOL I totally missed the whole "hotel" part of your earlier post. I was imagining one of those water park places with my 2yo on a lounge chair, my 10mo in a stroller, with some teeny-bopper sitting with them while they "napped". Hence why I said it would so not fly.

 

:lol::lol::lol:

[Denisemomof4]

I have four kids. I always focused on the oldest kids activities/social life and took all the kids along. Always. I felt bad for the younger kids but knew their time would come. That doesn't mean I did nothing with the younger kids but I did do far less. Younger kids don't need activities and such like older kids do.

 

I think it is especially important to focus on the teens in this area.

[Denisemomof4]

I think a lot of how you feel will depend on what you consider "missing out." The kids have a life, it's the one you are living. Anything you do is part of that. Stuff you don't do is just stuff you don't do, it's not necessarily missing out. KWIM?

 

I do think kids feel like they're missing out when their friends are doing things that your kid doesn't. I'm not saying that's right or wrong, it just is.

 

One of dd12's closest friends is about to turn 13. (they both are). Her mom has a 2 year old, a baby, and is due to deliver in December. The kid is over loaded with activities in a homeschool group she doesn't like (I don't know if she told her mom this but she told dd) because the mom is heavily involved and friends with the leader. She is obvously busy with the babies. I feel badly for the girl at times because I am always, always, always doing things with my kids and regularly take dd12 out alone to get a little break from her sister. (she has behavioral problems). I have really tried to set up regular time for the girls to get together but something always comes up to get in the way. And the girl is always so excited when she is with dd. It makes me sad.

[Wheres Toto]

We went to Disney when my oldest was 13 and my youngest was 2. We had a great time. So many of the rides in Disney are for all ages, plus all the shows. My oldest had a great time sharing things with her brother and seeing his excitement.

 

We've done zoo trips, camping trips, museums. These all worked out fine with a big age difference.

 

I would definitely get out there and do things with the kids on your own if dh doesn't want to. The olders should be a big help so you have an extra pair of eyes on the younger ones.

[laughing lioness]

Well, we seemed to function the opposite way--the little guys got dragged along to all the olders' stuff! ... :D

 

:iagree:This has always been us, too. My youngers have really grown up in a household full of adults rather than in a kid environment. This year is shifting to be more about the youngers- but that's cause the older ones are driving themselves and getting adult lives. It's a tough struggle.

[razorbackmama]

I have four kids. I always focused on the oldest kids activities/social life and took all the kids along. Always. I felt bad for the younger kids but knew their time would come. That doesn't mean I did nothing with the younger kids but I did do far less. Younger kids don't need activities and such like older kids do.

 

I think it is especially important to focus on the teens in this area.

This actually is how we function for regularly occurring activities. For example, my oldest is involved in AWANA and Young Marines. (I've actually tried to encourage him to get involved in Taekwon-Do, but he has no interest. He has been involved in other sports as well, but they sort of fell flat.) My 14yo is in AWANA and Taekwon-Do. My 12yo just does AWANA, but she has been able to do things like cake decorating classes, etc. My littles just come along OR they stay home with any bigs who aren't involved.

 

I'm most talking about "bigger" things...field trips, vacations, etc.:001_smile:

[TGHEALTHYMOM]

Too many times our plans fall apart for

"discussion"

 

One night while getting supper ready, I started texting dh, it was so funny!

I texted him questions to ask everyone about what we had read that day for history.

 

Most of the time I am not able to do that so.. I do demand a time of quiet reading or napping... of course my oldest will sometimes try to nap!

 

I let him on occassion, but he is not as bad about it as he was at age 12.

 

It is hard to get it all done, and I am trying to ask dh to help... or at least help get little ones in bed earlier.:tongue_smilie: