I'm not ready for this---not at all . . .

[Michelle in MO]

Yesterday morning, before I rushed off to take my test, I discovered that my youngest daughter, who just turned 11 in December, has officially entered puberty (kwim?). I was shocked---stunned---and I'm embarrassed to bring this up on these boards, but has anyone else had this experience with a child so young?

 

I think some of this has to do with beef and chicken raised on hormones and antibiotics. Probably years ago I should have known about this and avoided it.

 

Nevertheless, I have a very young, 11-year-old daughter who is still my "baby" who is going to be experiencing this every month.

 

Any advice? I guess I can't turn back the clock.

[abbeyej]

Um, I was eleven when I started. I was never given to believe that that was particularly early, even 20 years ago.

 

I know it's emotional to see our babies grow up... ((hugs))

[A home for their hearts]

Yesterday morning, before I rushed off to take my test, I discovered that my youngest daughter, who just turned 11 in December, has officially entered puberty (kwim?). I was shocked---stunned---and I'm embarrassed to bring this up on these boards, but has anyone else had this experience with a child so young?

 

I think some of this has to do with beef and chicken raised on hormones and antibiotics. Probably years ago I should have known about this and avoided it.

 

Nevertheless, I have a very young, 11-year-old daughter who is still my "baby" who is going to be experiencing this every month.

 

Any advice? I guess I can't turn back the clock.

 

I really don't have any advice, but just to say, I hit puberty one month before my 12th birthday. I was so mad, my sister who is 2 years older then me had just started herself 2 months before I did. I hope she's coping with it ok.

:grouphug:

[Audrey]

Yesterday morning, before I rushed off to take my test, I discovered that my youngest daughter, who just turned 11 in December, has officially entered puberty (kwim?). I was shocked---stunned---and I'm embarrassed to bring this up on these boards, but has anyone else had this experience with a child so young?

 

I think some of this has to do with beef and chicken raised on hormones and antibiotics. Probably years ago I should have known about this and avoided it.

 

Nevertheless, I have a very young, 11-year-old daughter who is still my "baby" who is going to be experiencing this every month.

 

Any advice? I guess I can't turn back the clock.

 

Umm... 11 isn't too young. The "normal" range for the onset of menses is between 8 and 15 years of age. I was barely 11 when I got my first period. My mom didn't make a big deal out of it. That was probably the best thing she could have done. She simply lent me some products and told me I could either continue to share from her stuff or choose my own products to try. She gave me a few pointers on cleaning up, and treated it all as if it were the most natural thing in the world... which it is.

 

Now, maybe on the inside, she may have been reacting differently, but her calmness and straight-forwardness was very reassuring and helpful to me.

[Angel]

Dd was a couple months shy of 12 when she started. I was expecting it. All the signs were there. I also was 11. Had she shown physical signs of beginning puberty? My dd had signs the year before, right before turning 11. I guess because I started so early, I always look on the side that those who started later were not the norm :001_smile:

 

Angel

[Melissa in Australia]

I was 9, and so was my mother, and my grandmother.

MelissaL

[Plucky]

How old were you Michelle when you started?

 

I had just turned 12. I recently found out that in my dh's family the girls start at 11. I made sure to prepare my dd since she was 10. Nothing big, just a few chats and hugs. BTW, I was extremely irregular for years, not sure how other girls' cycles were. Your dd may not get it monthly for a while. Hugs to you.

[Tammyla]

Ah, my little girl started at eleven. For me it felt way too early, but it was just her time. We talked openly about it, read a book and went on with life. Now it's just part of life. They do grow up too quickly.

[Jann in TX]

In my family 9 is about average! My oldest dd was/is very petite (read this as skinny as a rail) and she did not start until her 12th birthday (what a present). Her 9yr old sister followed her 2 weeks later. Both girls were prepared and knew where the 'supplies' were and how to use them.

 

My sister was 11--and my mother was too embarrassed to 'have the talk'--so I CLEARLY remember my sister screaming like she was dying. I got the 'talk' that day with my big sis--and I started the next month!

 

11 is not young--and it has nothing to do with hormones in milk and beef (as far as I'm concerned as I grew up 'organic')--people just talk about it more now!

[mommybee]

I was twelve. Always seemed about average to me.

 

My 9 ds is starting to have bodily changes as well and it's a bit strange. My 13 ds is just beginning himself, he didn't start early like his brother is.

[JFSinIL]

so I am really dating myself! But my dd#1 was almost 14 before she started...and dd#2, almost 12, hasn't started at all. So go figure.

[Angela in TN]

I was 11 years old also and my mom wanted to take me out to dinner!! It wouldn't have been sooo horrible but she told my dad and brother, do I still sound traumatized?! My best friend in high school didn't start until she was 15 I was very jealous. Just give her a hug and sounds like you need one too!

[Michelle in MO]

I guess I had just turned 13 when I started, but my oldest daughter started closer to about 11-1/2 and my middle daughter when she was 12. It's just that----she's only 11, so she really does seem like my "baby"!

 

I was calm---just very surprised, and wondering, "What did I do wrong? Did I give this girl too much beef or chicken with hormones in it?" (Not that I would know how to prevent that, unless I bought my meat prepared somewhere else.)

 

Anyway, it's comforting to know that she's not out of the norm. She is very independent, so she had already read a book or two on her own on the subject.

 

It was just so strange---here I was, rushing off to take my big test (GRE) and then---another big event! There was very little time to sit down with her except to help her get started with the basics.

 

A strange day. But---I'm very relieved that she's in the range of normal.

 

Thank you all! A big hug to all of you!

[mommybee]

I was 11 years old also and my mom wanted to take me out to dinner!! It wouldn't have been sooo horrible but she told my dad and brother, do I still sound traumatized?! My best friend in high school didn't start until she was 15 I was very jealous. Just give her a hug and sounds like you need one too!

 

 

 

I had one of those mom's that announced it to the entire world!

 

I was so embarrased!!:blush:

[mktkcb]

Well, if it were hormonal chicken/beef/milk, I'm sure my dd's would have been early, as I don't scrutinize my meat like some do, but they both were 13 (as was I). I think there are many other factors involved, and I know MANY girls who started MUCH earlier. Its really not that big a deal. Just a part of life. For your dd's sake, try to be matter of fact about the whole thing, and you both will survive the shock just fine :o).

[KarenNC]

I was 9, and so was my mother, and my grandmother.

MelissaL

 

I was 9 as well, but my sister had to go on birth control meds to actually bring hers on after she was 16 (and later needed fertility treatments to get pregnant).

[urban_mom]

to please get more comfortable with saying PERIOD! My mother ruined each of my sisters and myself by acting like it was something "weird" and I REALLY wish mothers (homeschooling mothers at that!) would please talk about it like it was totally normal and not embarassing. It's NOT! It's your PERIOD! This is a board full of WOMEN! We can say period here, can't we?

[Janet in WA]

Yesterday morning, before I rushed off to take my test, I discovered that my youngest daughter, who just turned 11 in December, has officially entered puberty (kwim?). I was shocked---stunned---and I'm embarrassed to bring this up on these boards, but has anyone else had this experience with a child so young?

 

I think some of this has to do with beef and chicken raised on hormones and antibiotics. Probably years ago I should have known about this and avoided it.

 

Nevertheless, I have a very young, 11-year-old daughter who is still my "baby" who is going to be experiencing this every month.

 

Any advice? I guess I can't turn back the clock.

Well, with all you had on your mind, it's a wonder you were able to concentrate on the test at all.

[Scarlett]

Well, if it makes you feel any better, *I* was mad when my niece started at age 10!!! She was still a baby to me! Sigh. She is going to be 20 this year....and survived early puberty.

 

I was three months past 13. Excited by then. 10 would have traumatized me.

 

Hug your girl and life goes on.

[LG Gone Wild]

I don't want my dd to grow up! I just don't. I so adore her now at age 5. Isn't there a moping icon I can pick?

[Guest Katia]

Well, this might cheer you up a bit: remember that when girls first start having their periods they can be really irregular.

 

One of my dds started at 12yo and didn't have another period until 1 YEAR later. She is 18yo and still goes every two to three months between periods. That is 'normal' for her.

 

Other dd started at 13yo and didn't have another period for 6 months. Then, she was regular every month, and now, at almost 16yo, is every two-three months as well.

 

Actually, I am VERY jealous of them. I started at 12yo and was regular every 28 days unless I was preggers (and yup, I started back up 28 days after each birth, even with breastfeeding), until I had my hysterectomy.

 

So, there is hope that your dd will not have to deal with this every month from now on out. :001_smile:

[KidsHappen]

My mother was eleven, I was eleven and all three of my older dds were eleven as well. I always thought that 11 was about average. My current 11 yr. old will be any day now. I am taking this one much harder than the rest as she is not as emotionally mature as the rest were. I am sure she will handle it just fine though.

[Janna]

My oldest child, my dd, is turning 10 this month. She is just now starting to bud a little bit. She is the skinniest little thing - quite unlike how I was at her age. I too, am feeling the "I'm not ready for this!" panic.

 

I was 11 when I got mine, so chances are she'll follow in that footstep. But I truly thought it would be later for her because she is such a stick -no hips whatsoever, can see her ribs through her shirts sometimes - esp. when she bends. But with this new "development" (pun intended), she may be sooner than I thought. And fwiw, we only eat organic meat and dairy, and it's precious little at that because of the cost - so I know it's not hormone related.

 

(((Hugs))). I feel your pain. :cheers2:

[Karen sn]

A good mineral blend to stave off cramps (Enzymatic Therapy Kreb Cycle Chelates) and some fatty acid/omega acid supplement for moods.

[ArwenA]

My mom didn't make a big deal out of it. That was probably the best thing she could have done. She simply lent me some products and told me I could either continue to share from her stuff or choose my own products to try. She gave me a few pointers on cleaning up, and treated it all as if it were the most natural thing in the world... which it is.

 

Now, maybe on the inside, she may have been reacting differently, but her calmness and straight-forwardness was very reassuring and helpful to me.

 

This was the same as my mom. I was so relieved that she was so calm and organized. One of my friends had gotten her period a few moths before and her mom made a big deal about it, I was scared my mom would do the same thing. But there was no fuss, I suppose she told my dad but he never mentioned to me. A few years ago my sister asked me when I got my period. We were both 12 and a 1/4, her period is usually begins one day before mine.

[Halftime Hope]

but a friend's pediatrician told her that periods usually start around the time a girl reaches 90-95 pounds. Something about that set point in body mass triggers certain things, and voila!

 

It has been true in three or four IRL families that I know...past that, I haven't hired Zogby to do a poll. ;)

 

I started when I was 14, but dd was much later--and it fits with the weight pattern.

[Cathycam]

My friend was panicing about one of her daughters beginning things early and I found a research website that listed ages of menarche through history. It was so interesting...girls traditionally began in the same age range we see today. But during the industrial revolution the ages increased. So girls began an average of 15 yo to 18 yo....then over the last century the ages declined again. The researcher hypothesised that it was primarily because of nutrition - people leaving agraian ways of life to live in cities, etc.

 

I started looking because I kept wondering if girls are so much younger now how did they get married so young and start having babies at 14 "back then".

 

I think 11 is pretty average too...

[Lizzie in Ma]

I got and discussed the American Girl Book, "The Care and Keeping of You" two years ago and recently took her for "supplies".

 

Heaven forbid she was as unprepared as I was and the only supplies in my house were my Mom's 1950's :tongue_smilie: horrid old chastity belt looking thing!!

[Jenny in Atl]

Dd12 finally got hers a few months ago. I say finally because she was driving me nuts, complaining she was the only one of her friends who had not yet got hers. A number of her friends had gotten theirs at 10 & 11. She was right on time at 12 like me, and both grandmothers on each side.

[Quiver0f10]

I was 10 and both my DD's were 11.

[crazycoffeechic]

I was 11 when I started, my mom was so happy, she hugged me and told me that I was a young lady now :hurray:

My daughter started when she was 11 too.

[Linda in NM]

I have a friend--a nutritionist--who says that you really should have your children drink organic milk, as well as free-range chicken and beef...so we spend all our money at Whole Foods...:-)

[cricket1178]

I was 12 and in the 7th grade when I started, but I remember many of my friends had already started their periods. I talked with my dd about it when she was 9 because this was the age my sister was when she started and that was the ages of her 1st 2 dds, but her 3rd dd was 14. My dd is 12 (just turned) so I imagine mother nature will be visiting our house soon, too. She is my youngest as well so I completely understand. Our babies grow up, but we don't have to like it:sad:! Here's my hug to you and to all of us whose little ones arn't so little anymore :grouphug:

[Rebecca in GA]

Awww...I'm sorry it was upsetting to you! :grouphug:

 

I'm one of the "late bloomers." I started at 14 when I was in 9th grade. (I was tiny for my age.) My mom was 15 or 16 when she started, same story on size, and my Gram had to take her to the gynecologist to make sure nothing was wrong with her. Could be different for my DD, who's 8, because she is more of a normal size for her age.

[Doran]

I can't remember exactly how old I was. I'm pretty sure I was in 9th grade which would've made me 14. I know I was starting to think something was wrong with me because EVERY girl I knew had already started. I was so relieved -- and pleased, I might add. My mother says she was also a very late "bloomer".

 

Michelle, I see you've gone through this with two other daughters, so I'm assuming your little girl will have plenty of support from you and her sisters on what to expect. I know that if my littlest, my eleven year old baby (who is so much younger than her sister was at the same age, kwim?) started her period today, I'd be very surprised. Only yesterday we had a conversation about how she needs to start using deodorant - stinky armpitted little thing that she was. :D So, I think we've a ways to go yet. But, I know so many girls who start right around eleven or earlier. I think it's just that she is your youngest and probably, like mine, acts the part.

 

I wanted to encourage you, though, by reminding you that it's all good. It's her time to experience this special gift that women have. I hope you can share some of the joy with her instead of just that she'll be "experiencing" this every month.

 

Mommybee would not have enjoyed being my daughter ;). We planned a special ceremony in honor of my oldest dd's first period last summer. We invited women who have known dd all her life (if my mother lived closer, she would have had a place of honor in our group for sure!) Dd was thrilled to be celebrated for her passage into womanhood. She wanted the gathering (otherwise, I wouldn't have done it), and it was a very special evening for all of us.

 

It is hard, though, not to miss the times when they were so young. Our babies grow up faster than we want, don't they!?

 

Doran