Survey: If you had to abandon hsing....

[Ohio12]

what the ONE reason probably be?

[Beth in Central TX]

My death. DH would probably enroll the boys in our local classical Christian private school at that point. I have life insurance just to cover the cost of their tuition.

[Jenny in Atl]

At this time... I would agree with the post above, my death. However, my better half has already said he would just pack-up some bks, and bring the girls with him to work or move his shop back into our home, and continue to teach them the best he could.

[Antonia]

to continue my kids' home education if I were to die. He would use my life insurance to hire a nanny/educator. I guess the only other reason I'd ever consider stopping would be if my dh and I were to divorce and I was forced to return to work full-time. I just know I wouldn't have the stamina to continue hsing in that case.

[Daisy]

Death or chronic debilitating illness.

[bkpan]

my reason would have to be that homeschooling was no longer the BEST option for my dc or our family. We plan to be prayerfully willing to go any direction that the Lord leads us. If I look back just 5 years, we have gone through some life changes that we would never have imagined. Never say never. :)

 

Kim in TN (used to be in NV)

[Ohio12]

What a precious DH!

[Pegasus]

Even before reading the other posts, my first thought was death of either parent or divorce. . .or if the kids grew up and went off to college. I guess we'd be forced to give up homeschooling then too.

 

Pegasus

[Michelle T]

and with the real estate market so terrible, it's possible that will happen this year.

Michelle T

[Sue G in PA]

would be the only thing I can think of. We used to say we evaluate each year, but we are committed. Of course, my dh's job would be easy enough to do a work from home a few days a week so he could feasibly continue. If I had to go back to work, we'd work something out. My parents are very supportive and could take over some of the teaching if my job were close to them.

[beansprouts]

my reason would have to be that homeschooling was no longer the BEST option for my dc or our family. We plan to be prayerfully willing to go any direction that the Lord leads us.

 

That would be the reason for me also.

[Trivium Academy]

Doesn't this fall under "speak no evil, see no evil, hear no evil"? Life's unpredictability is what makes it worth living, so a better question is what are you going to do WHILE you're homeschooling?

[Ohio12]

I posted this because I have one or two main fears as I begin hsing my first dd and wanted to see if anyone else shared them. Most do not, I see, since death is the most common response! :)

[ConnieB]

Ok, my death wouldn't cut it....we purchased life insurance specfically with the idea that if I were to die DH would be able to take several years off to raise the kids. Now we also have insurance to cover the mortgage should something happen to one of us, so we'd have a paid off house, we are basically debt free, so my life insurance would go quite a way. That was the plan when the kids were all young....now that they are older and could probably keep up with their school work themselves with some Dad-teacher time in the evenings, he'd likely hire cleaning services to take that burden off everyone. If it were to happen right now, he may hire someone to be with the kids, as they're really at that "almost" stage, not quite ready to be home alone. But I see that not being necessary in another year or two....and I intend to be around for a while, lol.

 

If something were to happen to DH, we also have enough life insurance for the kids and I to go on, again, the house would be paid off. If something were to happen health wise to DH so he could no longer work, he would supervise their schooling and I would return to work, although in my mind that would be the most financially difficult. I haven't worked for over a decade, not sure I could find work to support us all. But DH is healthy so I don't worry too much about it. We have disability insurance, but that pays very little.

 

The only other way I could see not homeschooling any longer would be if the schools in our area did a miraculous turn around and started being in the top 10% of the country, instead of the bottom. But I figure that before that happens, pigs would fly, we'd win the lottery, and I'd become a famous rock and roll star.....so schooling would have to continue on our tour bus anyway.

[Nestof3]

Perhaps death of my husband -- my provider? We do have life insurance and only 3 more years to pay on our little house, but still -- I'm not sure about that.

 

Other than that, I can think of NOTHING that would stop me. Even then, I would fight tooth and nail.

[OnTheBrink]

Well, happily divorce didn't put an end to homeschooling my dd. EX is completely supportive of that and between child support, alimony and what I make babysitting, we're getting by.

 

However, if I were become very ill or if some unforeseen thing happened to EX where I'd lose the support and alimony, I'd have to work full time and dd would have to go to school. I'd probably try to see if any of the private schools here would allow for a scholarship or allow me to work there to pay tuition.

[Christy B]

But I'm going to say it anyway:

 

 

Exhaustion.

 

 

 

Physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual exhaustion -- can and (as far as I know, already has) brought me to the end of my homeschooling journey, at least for one child, at least for this coming year.

 

Mind you -- I don't think it's the homeschooling that has brought me to this point. But, being at this point means I am no longer an effective teacher. Therefore, homeschooling is (apparently) no longer in the best interest of our family.

 

Like someone else said -- never say never.

[mcconnellboys]

I agree with this,

 

Regena

[Kris]

Nothing new here. If I died, my husband would want to continue, but he wouldn't feel up to the task. He doesn't think he's "smart enough" -- but he certainly is. If he died, I'd have to go to work. So that would end it there, too, probably.

[Zee]

Extreme deterioration of the relationship between my son and I. Having an only child puts a LOT of focus on the relationship between ds and I. Sometimes we are on each other's nerves because we spend so much time together. Also, ds is constantly under the microscope of parents who don't have other children to pay attention or compare to. The expectations on ds can be too high sometimes - we forget he's a kid and expect him to act like an adult. Also, there's friction because he thinks he's one of the adults (some of that is our fault, some of it is not). That causes a lot of grief for us at times. He is socialized and spends lots of time with other kids, so it's not that kind of issue. But sometimes, when we are having behavior issues with ds, it can get intense between the two of us. My husband has occasionally brought up the idea of school when we are having tough times but I fight against his thinking. DH always feels we should consider all options when trying to solve a problem. I see dh's point logically, but ds schooling anywhere but home isn't one of the choices for me. I still think homeschooling is the best option and I don't feel led by God to do something else, at this point. If I felt, it was best for ds and that God was leading us to send him to school, then I guess I would have to be obedient to His will. But, if we were to send him and I didn't feel peace with the Lord about it, it would be like a death to me. I know that's not right....but it's how I feel. Everytime dh brings up to possibility of school, I get VERY defensive and feel like I would go into mourning. Maybe some of you know what I mean. It would be against every thought, every fiber of my being....I am so sure that I am doing what God created me to do at this moment in our lives.

[Rhesa]

But I'm going to say it anyway:

 

 

Exhaustion.

 

 

 

Physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual exhaustion -- can and (as far as I know, already has) brought me to the end of my homeschooling journey, at least for one child, at least for this coming year.

 

 

Wow- I really appreciate this honesty. It describes how I feel. My husband & I decided we would reevaluate each year. But in this, our first official homeschooling year, I have felt more exhausted than I ever thought possible!

 

I can't just blame homeschooling, though- we made a really big move 9 months ago.

 

But there have been so many days where I thought, "I can't do this if I'm going to be this physically and emotionally drained."

 

So I keep lurking (and occasionally posting here) because I receive encouragement to keep going.:)

[TracyR]

I would be death for me . I've worked and homeschooled .. I can't say illness because my youngest was born with multiple birth defects in 2006 and we did it ! It was mighty hard but we did . She still has health problems but not as much she did her first year . Its still difficult but we manage :>) But so worth it because our school system is terrible where we live and the private schools we only have 1 in our area and another that requires a 3hr bus drive . They are too expensive and no way would I expect my children to sit on a bus 3hrs one way .

[PeterPan]

Ohio12, I guess I wondered what your fears are. My guess is whatever they are, you're going to be able to work through them, most people do. And my guess is most people who end up putting their kids in school DON'T end up doing it for reasons they would have predicted. Just a thought.

 

The top issues I think most homeschoolers face are:

-health disabilities (either their own or their dc's)

-discipline

-lack of organization, personal discipline, or structure to make it happen (fortunately life goes on, even when we aren't doing as well as we'd like there)

 

You can perservere through a lot, if you work at it. Don't buy trouble you don't have. I see you're in Columbus. Are you planning to go to the CHEO convention this summer? http://www.cheohome.org They have a WONDERFUL getting started session that is worth going to. She'll explain the law, give lots of tips, talk about all the things you're worried about. It's just a wonderful, nourishing convention where you'll come away recharged, refreshed, and equipped to go forward.

[LadyAberlin]

Nothing. My mother homeschools and my sister plans on homeschooling when she has kids. I think one of them would do it for me if something happened to me. I know I would do it for them.

[Ohio12]

Thank you for this response. It was actually encouraging because I don't have ANY of the fears you describe! I am very organized and love teaching dd. I was a teacher by trade before having kids. I am more worried that dd will not have enough friends to play with and that she will miss out on fun stuff she hears her friends doing at school. That I am cheating her out of the "school" experience. I know that if I think this is best for our family I should do it any way, but I second guess myself. You are wise to say too, that what ends up being the hardest part is sometimes not what we THINK the hardest part will be!

[Ohio12]

Thanks for your honesty. I am glad to hear it isn't a breeze for everyone but me!

[PeterPan]

Well I have an only, at least until the baby this fall (though even then she's still more or less an only), and I have to tell you the loneliness thing is WAY overrated. Does your dd have friends? I bet as you get more active in local homeschool activities, she's going to make new friends, homeschooled friends, and that comparison isn't going to be such an issue. I know I talked with my dd flat up about it, and she looked at me INCREDULOUSLY, wondering why she'd want to be cooped in school when she could be at home reading and actually doing things (sewing, crafting, playing with her cats, exploring). And frankly, most kids aren't all-fired to leave their mothers at this age either. Not that my dd is a skirt-clinger (not by any means, hehe!), but at age 5 or 6 she'd much rather have been with me then off in a cold-antiseptic building with strangers. I think most kids would.

 

So don't WORRY. Your kids are going to want to be with you and they're NOT going to feel deprived, especially with a sibling. But you are going to get them involved in some things and keep them connected. Find something they want to sign up for (swim lessons, a class, whatever). Get connected with a local homeschool group and do fieldtrips with them to the fire station, etc. Join a play group. Find some other homeschooled friends for her to meet with once a week.

 

Really, the "I need friends" thing crept up on my dd pretty heavily just this year. And honestly, I took it as a providential thing, that God was preparing her heart for the baby. She started having these strong feelings of being alone, wanting something more, would cry and cry in the evenings. And this was despite being in daily sports, having every Saturday with her grandma to shop, having numerous relationships with older couples in the church (you know, the type who bring you presents and coddle you), relationships with other adults who were teaching her knitting and things, weekly co-op classes with homeschooled kids, and friends coming over for long afternoons every week. I mean I don't know how you could possibly GIVE the kid any more than I was, and it wasn't that she wanted school, just something more. Well then I found out I was prego! I started working her up toward it, talking with her about what it was she wanted (something to hold and love on, something to dress and play with, which she finally concluded ought to be a puppy, hehe!), and I suggested she pray about it, that God would give her everything she needed and make her content with the rest. Well she grappled with that in her own 8 yo soul for quite a while there, and I let her, knowing that the spiritual issue was important and that she truly had everything she "needed" socially. Well when I told her about the baby coming, she just totally turned around and all that was gone!

 

So you can't assume, even if they SAY they're lonely or want to go to school or whatever, that that's REALLY the issue. A wise parent sorts through what's going on. Sometimes I think it could be a maturing thing and needing a change in how you do things, not that they need school per se.

 

You're going to be fine! I'd definitely encourage you to get connected and find a homeschool group or two where you feel comfortable. You have access to so much in Columbus and you'll feel so much more connected, not alone. I know I've been so blessed by relationships with older, veteran moms, even if I don't see them very often. Sometimes they come just at the time when you have a real question or issue you're struggling with and they can give you just the right words. Sometimes those meetings open up doors to new friends and new opportunities for your dc. (Our co-op classes this year are because of someone I met like that!) So get connected. You're gonna do great! :)

[elegantlion]

I have an only too, he plays with the great neighbor kids. He gets lonely sometimes, but there is so much to do during the day, he thinks it's special to be out when all the other kids are 'stuck' at school.

 

My death would be the only thing that might end homeschooling. I know my dh would move to be nearer my parents and my mom would try to homeschool. If something happened to my dh, I probably move in with my parents and continue to homeschool.

[PeterPan]

BTW, that's not to say I never had doubts or fears or misgivings about the loneliness thing. Believe me, I have! But you have to find that balance of knowing you've done as much as is sensible and knowing this is still the best path for your dc. You have to know WHY you're doing this if you're going to stick with it. In fact, I'll say that again. Figure out WHY you're homeschooling and write it down. You want to know, so when you're unsure and shaken, you can go back to those reasons and see if they still stand.

 

Sometimes you're not chosing between a clearly bad and a clearly good option. Sometimes you're chosing between two (or three or four!) really good options, and you have to sort through what is best. Homeschooling is not about slamming every other option or even closing the door on things. To do that is to tempt fate and providence, frankly. (Man, I'm not going to be the one to get on this board and say over my dead body, because I like being alive and not humiliated by huge life changes either!) Things happen.

 

This past summer I really hit a low and wondered what I was doing. I had only my one dc, no hope of more on the way, and *I* felt empty. Is that a good reason for putting a dc in school? I don't know, but I know my life had changed and everything wasn't good. I started checking into some degree options, working toward a degree with the idea of going into teaching, talked with a dear teacher at a school I'd consider teaching at and putting dd in, if it were right for us. Now our life has changed again, and with me prego I'm on a different course, not pursuing that. But you know, I'm woman enough to say that, as stuck on homeschooling as I am, I'd probably be pursuing that right now if I hadn't gotten prego. NEVER say never.

 

You will have doubts and feelings over the years. Know why you're doing what you're doing and work through those issues, making your best decision. Now I know some people who approach homeschooling on a year to year basis, re-evaluating each fall if it's going well, if they feel they ought to continue, etc. That's not what makes me feel most stable. For me, I'm on the path of homeschooling unless God (or life or whatever) whomps me on the head and says, "Go this way you mule!" I think we're all humble enough to know those things can come, despite our intentions or current preferences, and that we'd go in the way that seems best at the time. It's not about being unstable or uncommitted (remember I already said to write down why you're doing this and be committed). It's about being flexible with life and how things change.

 

You're going to do great with homeschooling, don't worry about it! Just enjoy this age! K5 and 1st grade are just the sweetest age/stage. Now I'm looking forward to doing it again. By 2nd grade and 3rd it's just work, work, work, but oh for K5 and 1st!! Have fun with it, snuggle, read aloud long hours in the sun, take picnics to do your schoolwork. Be happy!! :)

[Magic Wand]

Without elaborating anymore than to say dh wants a divorce, I'm not sure what we're facing with regard to homeschooling. The good news is dh seems and expresses, at least at present, that he's in favor of us continuing to homeschool.

 

Now we'll see what time and logistics offer up. I'm certainly not opposed to doing whatever necessary to make it work. I'm organized, so I don't foresee juggling several things as a problem. I'm willing to sacrifice. Money would likely be the bottom line, but my faith tells me that if it's in God's plan...it'll happen. I'm putting my trust there for now.

[Heather in VA]

Without elaborating anymore than to say dh wants a divorce, I'm not sure what we're facing with regard to homeschooling. The good news is dh seems and expresses, at least at present, that he's in favor of us continuing to homeschool.

 

Now we'll see what time and logistics offer up. I'm certainly not opposed to doing whatever necessary to make it work. I'm organized, so I don't foresee juggling several things as a problem. I'm willing to sacrifice. Money would likely be the bottom line, but my faith tells me that if it's in God's plan...it'll happen. I'm putting my trust there for now.

 

I just wanted to give you some ((((((((HUGS))))))))) and send prayers your way.

 

Heather

[PeterPan]

Zee, I know what you mean! With my dd this year, that was coming to a head and I decided she needed some time where she was acountable to other people. The way my dh puts it is "You need some time apart!" He made a huge effort to make sure I could get to Curves nightly, until I got prego and was too wiped to continue. I started her in piano lessons specifically to give her some time accountable to someone else. You're right, it can get VERY intense and sort of funny when it's just the two of you. Everyone says dd talks like a 20 yo. ;)

[Magic Wand]

Oh Heather,

 

Thank you, truly. Prayers and hugs are just what we need. Thanks for reaching out. I'm off to read to the girls.

[Pensguys]

My death. DH would probably enroll the boys in our local classical Christian private school at that point. I have life insurance just to cover the cost of their tuition.

 

Same here for us......we haven't discussed the boys actually staying home and doing their work while dh is at work, but it may be a possibility depending on their ages if something were to happen.

[kfrench]

One my husband pushed and pushed and I slowly lost my confidence in myself. Second I had an out of control 3 year old boy that really needed more one on one time with mommy. My husband felt that he was missing out on having a mommy and considered an interuption and a nusance. Truthfully I felt awful when he would act up just to get my attention. School started taking until 4-5 pm. My daughter got an additude. My daughter was playing sick to get out of school work. routinely. I could never tell if she was sick of faking it. One daughter couldn't pay attention. I started yelling at my kids everyday because if the frustration of my husbands lack of support, my kids negative additudes and a 3 year old bugging everyone constantly.

So I gave in and gave up. I am enjoying just doing preschool with my 3 year old but I do miss my girls and I feel guilt and like I didn't persevere as I should have. But I did find out everything that I was weak on in Homeschooling and all my hs strengths. My daughters both have learning disabilities that had not been diagnosed and so now I know why I was hitting brick walls. The PS put my daughter back a year which really helped decrease her stress in school. Probably why she gave me additude and playing sick school had just gotten too hard. The PS thought It was that I didn't teach phonics until I talked to their reading specialist and told her we used Spalding-that's what they use for kids behind in reading. Found out my kids knew all their phonograms and rules just didn't use them in their reading. Found out that daughter couldn't pay attention at school either. One of hubby's arguements was that there were too many distractions at home so she needed to go to school.

 

I am praying daily that God will guide me in where the girls should be next year and which curriculum to use. I hope to bring my daughter that is a slow learner home she has bad test anxiety and so does great when she studies at home and then flunks tests and doesn't know why except she gets nervous and is afraid she will fail. My younger daughter loves school and I think she will stay there. She just wasn't finding friends that liked the same things as her at home and in the homeschool groups. Now she has found her nitch. I think that after voluteering in the girls classes I have a lot more confidence in my self as a teacher and I know now what weaknesses my girls need to improve and I know were to focus. Now I go to their school and tutor the slow kids-figure that. Now I know why they say that kids sucess at school is dependant on parent involvement with homework and at the school. Because it is the parents that make sure the kids learn what they need at home- spelling words, math facts, reading practice, editing all writing papers.--really I am still teaching them all the r's at home.

I also am learning it is ok not to homeschool your kids God still will take care of them. So it doesn't have to be death that sends them to school.

Still hope they can come back home It is so boring being home without them. Love preschool though for some reason I didn't think of doing it with my girls beyond crafts. Funny thing my husband want's me to HS the youngest until 2nd -3rd grade not sure I want that heart break of sending him to school but I think that I know more now and will do a better job and focus more on reading and math facts.

 

kris

Kris

[8filltheheart]

I think the most realistic answers you received were Christy's and Elizabeth's. And whoever said....never say never. It is absolutely impossible to know how you will respond to circumstances until you have actually worn the shoes.

 

I began homeschooling 14+ yrs ago with the conviction that homeschooling was not simply the best option, it was THE ONLY option. Life and time has definitely taught me that those beliefs and values were not only egotistical and arrogant, they were hollow. I totally disagree NOW that other options are inherently worse. The reality is they are inherently different. I totally disagree NOW that homeschooling is always the best decision.

 

All educational choices have pros and cons. Homeschooling is no different. There are tradeoffs. Christy's honest exhaustion reply.....btdt, doing it now. I am tired, too. I know exactly how she feels. I miss having extra lovey time with my littler ones b/c I am having to spend so much time schooling my older ones. I also readily recognize that others are capable of providing a better education than I can provide (thinking specifically about high school here......there is truth in the saying "jack of all trades but master of none." Masters in a subject CAN offer more depth and breadth to subjects than I can with my superficial knowledge.)

 

So far, for me, the benefits of homeschooling the majority of my children have outweighed the realistic cons of not. For one child who is now in school, the negatives of homeschooling definitely outweighed the benefits of school.

 

This simply isn't a question that anyone can answer for anyone else. Until you have lived through what life has in store for you and you weigh in all the available information at that time----firmly planting yourself in one place or the other seems to me to be the wrong answer.

[Nestof3]

Momof7,

 

While I agree that we never know how we will react when various trials come, I think it is unfair to think we could consider every possible trial and whether we would continue to homeschool through it. The question was posed for us as something to consider, and I think everyone answered the best they could with the information each person had at the time.

 

I, for one, find it interesting to see the various reasons why people homeschool here, and what would happen for them to change educational methods.

 

For some, having enough money to send to a private school would be enough to cease homeschooling, for another having children without special needs would be the impetus. For others, having highschoolers and feeling inadequate is enough.

 

For me, honestly, it is something that is a part of me down to my core. I have homeschooled through high school and I have homeschooled from birth, I have homeschooled while beginning a new marriage and having a stepson all at once. Of course, I do not know if I will be inflicted with cancer next year, or have a stroke, and so on, quite honestly, I didn't sit here and think about all the various horrible things that could happen.

 

So, let's just say it would take something very horrible -- not just more money, better schools, or a desire for more free time.

[ArwenA]

Having homeschooled through divorce and since DH is in full support of homeschooling it would have to be something so difficult I cannot imagine.

[8filltheheart]

Momof7,

 

While I agree that we never know how we will react when various trials come, I think it is unfair to think we could consider every possible trial and whether we would continue to homeschool through it. The question was posed for us as something to consider, and I think everyone answered the best they could with the information each person had at the time.

 

I, for one, find it interesting to see the various reasons why people homeschool here, and what would happen for them to change educational methods.

 

For some, having enough money to send to a private school would be enough to cease homeschooling, for another having children without special needs would be the impetus. For others, having highschoolers and feeling inadequate is enough.

 

For me, honestly, it is something that is a part of me down to my core. I have homeschooled through high school and I have homeschooled from birth, I have homeschooled while beginning a new marriage and having a stepson all at once. Of course, I do not know if I will be inflicted with cancer next year, or have a stroke, and so on, quite honestly, I didn't sit here and think about all the various horrible things that could happen.

 

So, let's just say it would take something very horrible -- not just more money, better schools, or a desire for more free time.

 

I guess I didn't make my point very well. My point is simply that no one else's answers are really going to matter. A person's reasons for no longer homeschooling are valid for that individual person. It isn't necessarily a wrong decision. Just as no one answer for why they homeschool or how they homeschool negate other homeschoolers valid replies.

 

THe majority of the replies stated death. That is a pretty all or nothing POV and a rather intimidating one, especially for people at the beginning of an unsure journey. Homeschooling takes commitment. But I don't agree that the commitment needs to be that drastic.

 

I had a homeschooling friend die just a couple of weeks ago. Her dd started going to ps about 2 yrs ago when she first got ill. What some are stating, I have witnessed. It certainly wasn't a failure that her dd was in school while her mother was ill. It was a simple reality.

 

I think the response to the thread boarder on the dramatic, not the realistic. There you go. Life can change overnight. I didn't state reasons like "not just more money, better schools, or a desire for more free time." But even if I had, until I lived w/o the money, or poor education, or so stressed that my children were suffering from my lack of space.....I wouldn't say that those reasons were frivilous and not serious. We simply can't know what will push us to the brink.

 

For me it was having a 16 yos who was kicking in doors and punching holes in walls and scaring his siblings. It boiled down to either finding him a place to go during the day or moving him out of our home. Would you like to visit??

[Osaubi]

All the books in the world vanishing :)

[Riverfront Headmistress]

Mondays. :sneaky2:and Fridays when no one wants to work:closedeyes:

[PeterPan]

I have a friend who had been homeschooled by her mother (quite excellently I might add, with latin, orchestra instruments, etc. back when that wasn't the norm), who had to go to school to finish high school because her mother became extremely chemically sensitive and ill after their house was pesticided for termites. They had to move, live in separate apartments because the mom was made sick by her own kids, etc. Momof7 has already given her example of extreme health problems, in this case with her ds, necessitating a change. The things that cause people to stop homeschooling don't seem to be things they would have anticipated. We might also want to consider that there are probably people on here reading this thread who put their dc in school at some point, for reasons they decided were best, and that no one is condemning them or making them seem less hardy than the rest. We all have breaking points, things that would make us change our mind, even if we can't imagine those things at the moment. Some people have just had the experience of reaching that point.

[Lynnatbeach]

Acceptance into an awesome Performing Arts high school in our area! :party:Yippee!

[MelissaMinNC]

my reason would have to be that homeschooling was no longer the BEST option for my dc or our family. We plan to be prayerfully willing to go any direction that the Lord leads us. If I look back just 5 years, we have gone through some life changes that we would never have imagined. Never say never.

 

 

Yeah, what she said! I can't imagine not homeschooling at this point, but I would stop if I felt the Lord leading me somewhere new. (It's my experience that he usually has something way better planned for me, than I could ever dream up on my own, ;). )

 

:)

Melissa

[Closeacademy]

Finances.

 

I do have a homeschool for my dc to go to if I was to die and if we both died I have picked out a nice little classical school where they would be living.

[rafiki]

.

[KAR120C]

The ones that come to mind are:

 

1. Needing to work (for whatever reason DH couldn't support us himself)
   
2. DS outpacing me in his areas of academic strength
   
3. Exhaustion
   
4. Our homeschool group ceasing to be a good support (I really do need people around me...)

There's a private school I would definitely consider here, that some of the kids in our church go to, and which I think DS might really fit. We don't need to use it now because he's doing great at home and we're enjoying ourselves, but if we needed it I'm happy to know it's there. There's also a math-and-science school that I'd love for him to go to, if only because I know at some point we'll have done all the math and science I can handle. And while it's way up there (I can certainly go through regular high school level without difficulty, but this school has some college level courses too) he's approaching it rather fast.... eek!

 

I have worked and homeschooled at the same time, and I would be willing to try it again, but I can certainly see situations where that would NOT work, no matter how hard I tried, and situations where trying it would lead very quickly to exhaustion. Not to mention that it would make it more difficult to participate in the homeschool group that I find such a necessary support...

[Nestof3]

THe majority of the replies stated death. That is a pretty all or nothing POV and a rather intimidating one, especially for people at the beginning of an unsure journey. Homeschooling takes commitment. But I don't agree that the commitment needs to be that drastic.

 

This is exactly what I read into your post. I am not sure why people get tense when some homeschoolers are very drastic about their commitment to homeschool. I couldn't care less if a family decides to enroll their child in a school -- either public or private. The reasons do not matte to me -- the children are not my children, and it is not my decision to make.

 

It doesn't threaten me at all, and it doesn't make me insecure about my decisions. My reasons to homeschool and my homeschooling path has no bearing on anyone else, so I don't understand anyone feeling "intimidated." It's not a competition to see who can hold out the longest. Each family is responsible for its own decisions.

 

But that doesn't mean anyone should be less zealous in their commitment to homeschool.

 

For example, I asked the question a few days ago about to see which families on the board homeschool because of religious conviction, or because it helped them fulfill what they felt God required of them. Those who didn't need not feel threatened by the question, if it didn't apply to them, who cares? I had someone leave me a feedback that said "I homeschool to keep my kids away from the religious." I cannot for the life of me figure out in what school his/her children would have encountered so many "religious" people that caused this person to need to homeschool.

 

Or was this just some knee-jerk reaction because it bothers this person that some people see it as a spiritual thing?

 

In conclusion, when I hear that someone homeschools because they feel that the public school down the street does not provide strong enough academics and the budget is too tight for private school, I don't think to myself, "Boy -- do they homeschool for the wrong reasons." I think, hmmm -- I think my children receive a better education too. I love seeing all the various reasons why people homeschool and what they think would stop them from doing so.

[Nestof3]

We might also want to consider that there are probably people on here reading this thread who put their dc in school at some point, for reasons they decided were best, and that no one is condemning them or making them seem less hardy than the rest. We all have breaking points, things that would make us change our mind, even if we can't imagine those things at the moment. Some people have just had the experience of reaching that point.

 

Again, I do not think that those who are homeschooling should have to censor their answers just because some people have chosen to/been forced to stop homeschooling. We all need to be secure in the decisions we make. I am sure the people you are referring to will be able to receive support and understanding when they post their situation.

 

For example, we homechurch with several families who are all quiverfull. We are not persuaded that we should have as many children as my body will allow, and their decisions don't make me doubt ours. We choose to have as many children as we feel WE can adequately care for, give attention to, afford and homeschool. I have had completely overwhelming times in our marriage, and I've always said that if I had 9 children, I don't think I could hold up under it. It is a personal decision -- one no one else need make for me.

 

Why can't we share where WE are on this board without worrying about offending others, and why can't we be mature when we disagree?

[Zee]

Thanks for understanding what I mean. We just need some space, occasionally. We enjoy each other's company most of the time, but time apart can be a good thing sometimes, too.