kid's chores before breakfast

[abreakfromlife]

So I'm in the middle of reading a long thread on the curric. board about chores and scheduling, etc.....and I've wondered this for awhile. I keep seeing people saying that their kids have to clean their rooms or do chores before breakfast, and breakfast is at 8:00 or whatever.

 

What if they're not done? I've tried doing this a few times and always the kids dink around and 'I can't do it, it's too hard'......and the times I have tried it, their rooms haven't been that messy and they know how to clean their rooms; there wasn't any reason why they shouldn't have been done in time.

 

So then, breakfast is either late, which means school is late, or I let them come and eat without finishing their room, and so their room is still a mess for later in the day. And both ways end with me being ornery at them and them being in a bad mood from whining and carrying on.....and then school is so much more difficult because everyone is in a bad mood.

 

 

So I gave up. But I love the idea of them having certain things done before breakfast. I just don't know how to make them work faster.

[MamaT]

My kids have to come down to breakfast at a certain time with their rooms tidy and their beds made. We do another "household" chore after breakfast before school.

 

The punishment for not being done on time, or not doing the chore well, is sentences. They have to do their sentences after schoolwork is completed, before they can do anything else - no TV, no computer, no outside, no nothing.

 

They finally found out that it was easier to be on time and do a good job than to sit and write sentences while everyone else was free.

[Cedarmom]

On the positive side when my son was younger, if he was ready on time with chores, he could have hot chocolate with breakfast.

 

We had a scheduled break time during school. If morning chores were complete, then it was free time, otherwise he had to do his chores then. And no screen time before chores were done.

[klmama]

If chores aren't done, they get less time for breakfast, which starts on time without them. Go ahead and eat, Mom, and feed the little ones who don't do chores yet! When breakfast time is over, it's over - you remove food from the table and clean up, expressing sorrow and understanding when they complain: "I'm sure you are hungry, son. I know I've felt hungry when I didn't eat breakfast." Be kind, understanding, but enforce the rules, and don't get sucked into an argument. (Read a Love and Logic book if you need help with this part.) School starts on time, and they participate, whether or not the work was done or breakfast was eaten. If their chores still aren't done by the time school starts, they do them during the break before they get a mid-morning snack, which also starts and ends at the appointed time. If not done by then, before lunch.

 

Yes, they are grouchy. Yes, everyone suffers a bit for it that day. And yes, if you stand your ground they will learn to work faster and will do so the next day or the day after that. It's amazing how much faster they will work if they realize you mean what you say about start and end times. Eventually, they will do their chores promptly and without the constant reminders, and everyone will enjoy a peaceful start to the day. It may help to give them a visual reminder of what to do, so you can enjoy your breakfast prep and eat in peace - a list for readers and a picture list for non-readers.

 

ETA: I assume you are talking about usual morning chores here, not huge amounts of work. My dc all have to make their beds, put away pajamas, and feed their pets before breakfast. Floors were supposed to be cleaned up by bedtime, but if they weren't they get done before breakfast, too. They should be dressed with hair brushed and faces washed. That's it. Other chores happen after breakfast and before school.

Edited June 29, 2009 by klmama

[Haiku]

I don't have my kids do chores before breakfast. They are hungry when they get up, and my dd is a slow-starter. Trying to make the kids work when they have low blood sugar from an overnight fast and when my dd is still trying to crawl into the land of the living would be a recipe for disaster.

 

The kids eat breakfast first thing and get 1/2 an hour to play/wake up. Then they do their morning routine. After that we start school. If they haven't finished their rooms by school time, then they have to finish immediately after we finish school, thereby sacrificing some of their play time. This is sufficient motivation that they normally get their morning routines done on time.

 

Tara

[Sarah CB]

We have a rule about clean rooms before we go to bed. So, before breakfast the kids just have to get up, get their clothes on, put their pj's away, make their beds and then come down for breakfast. After breakfast they do their morning chores which generally take 15 minutes. School and music practice both start on time. If they have leftover chores they do them during their free time at lunch (instead of playing).

 

I wouldn't make room cleaning part of the morning chore because that can be a really long chore depending on how messy the room is.

[Laura Corin]

Mine get no time to themselves until it's done, so all breaks in the day are cancelled. If they consistently fail to do it, they know I will wake them earlier and earlier until it is done.

 

Laura

[lvbnhome]

Don't you think all this would depend on the ages of your children? Seeing the ages of your children, I noted they are all pretty young still. Why couldn't they just have a 20-30 minute clean up time before bed, at night?

8, 6, 3, 2, 1... You really can expect more of them (and yourself), when they get older. Lots of Love:)

[Peela]

My kids have got their own breakfast for years. We jsut have a time when they need to be ready for school- chores done, dressed, breakfast. If they start early- my son likes to- he gets to finish early, thats all. Dd likes to start late, just because :glare:, and she gets to work in the afternoons when her brother is finished.

I dont connect chores to breakfast- sometimes they have brekkie first.

[Gretchen in NJ]

I KWYM. Who would want to wake up if they have to do their chores and then go to school right away? When my girls were younger, I picked their favorite play thing to motivate them. In our house, it was riding their bikes.

 

If my girls were able to complete their chores by 8:00, then they could ride their bikes until 8:30.

 

If they were 5 minutes late, no bike riding.

 

If they were early, they still could ride their bikes until 8:30. So, If they finished by 7:30, the they had an hour before school to ride their bikes.

 

My girls were addicted to bike riding.;)

[NancyNellen]

This is how we deal with this issue, as well. We stick to the schedule. It doesn't take too many days of only getting three bites of breakfast for them to realize dallying during chore time is a bad idea.

[mom31257]

My kids are STARVING when they wake up, so I don't make them do any chores before eating. I prefer they clean up their room before bed, so they only have to get dressed and brush teeth. For the coming year, I plan on having ds clean up the breakfast dishes and dd straighten up the bathroom before school. I hope that is the only morning chores to be done. (I'm working on a new cleaning plan/schedule).

[abreakfromlife]

Why couldn't they just have a 20-30 minute clean up time before bed, at night?

because that turns into an hour and they are staying up later :tongue_smilie:

 

I guess I just need to lay down the law a little bit better and not be such a pushover with them. I'm talking simple stuff - getting dressed, bed made, minor room messes picked up, pjs back in their drawer. I've let them get away with bad habits so now I have to fix it. Fun fun fun.

[bunnytracks]

I think it is easier to do chores in the evening that way in the morning all they have to do is get dressed, make their bed and eat. Plus I like waking up to a clean house.

 

For us we eat early in the evening (5pm) and then clean. If everyone finishes on time we have popcorn and watch a movie or play a game together. Those that don't finish are working while the others have a snack and play. Bedtime is at 9. I think 4 hours is plenty of time to expect general chores to be done.

[NancyNellen]

Well, we have both afternoon and morning chores. Mean mom :-)

 

We do our major picking up in the evening, but in the morning pets get fed, beds made, and they get dressed and put away jammies before breakfast. They are also required to do their memory page before breakfast (reviewing Scripture, poetry, math facts, Latin vocab, etc.) My husband doesn't leave for work until 9AM, so we tend to have large breakfasts (pancakes, french toast, eggs, etc.) After breakfast they brush and have one special chore for the day, such as emptying wastebaskets or watering plants.

 

To me, a solid, consistent chore set is crucial for the happiness and well-bring of all in the home :-)

[elise1mds]

I have tried chores before and chores after breakfast, and it doesn't matter for my son. He'll piddle either way. All he has to do is make his bed and change his clothes/put his PJ's away. Sometimes he does have to put a few things up if he has made a book mess during his after-tuck-in reading time the evening before, but that's all. He can drag this out to HOURS. I have finally had to do like some of you and give breakfast a set time. If he's not done eating by the end of that time, breakfast is over, regardless. He absolutely hates it, and there are weeks he pushes and pushes for no other reason than he is who he is, but overall it does work. DD gets herself up and puts her PJs away; sometimes she'll also dress herself, but I make her bed for now since it's shoved against a wall (she'd LIKE to do it but can't yet). She never fights with me. Crazy how opposite kids can be!

[tadbhoward]

Well my kids have chores that they have to complete before breakfast or they don't eat. Of course I am a slave driver so we are talking, get up, get dressed, make your bed, put your pajamas away. :lol:

[laurad1125]

We have both morning and afternoon chores at my house. I wake the boys at 9 and they have until school starts at 10 to eat breakfast (they fix their own cereal/waffles/muffins) and do morning chores (clean off desk, dress, brush teeth, feed hamsters, make bed.) I don't care what order eating/chores occur in. This usually leaves ds10 with 30 mins or so to lay in bed and contemplate getting up (which I also need to do each morning) and ds6 gets about 30 mins to play before school. We are not morning people at my house and trying to get people up with rooms clean, etc. by 8 would be a complete disaster.

 

Any work not completed before school is done during breaks.

 

In the evening we do the bigger chores. I start at 5:30 so the house is clean when dh comes home at 6:30. The boys have to clean their rooms, feed the cats and dogs, pick up the downstairs, check chlorine in the pool, and straighten either the book shelves or the bathroom. At 6:30 we eat. If chores are done, they get screen time immediately after dinner. If not, well finish those chores first.

 

I think the important thing is to think about how you and your kiddos work best. For some families, it feels great to get it all out of the way early. For others, that would be almost tortue.

[linders]

If I asked my two DS to do much of anything before eating, it would be a disaster. They wake up hungry. So we have a breakfast-wash/brush/dress-room clean routine here. At mid-morning we do a break where they do a chore then get a snack and playtime.

 

Since I can't do anything in the morning before coffee, I understand. We would be a disaster as a farm family.

[Garga]

Chores. Yuk. I need to start assigning them regular chores, don't I? They're 6 and 4. Right now they just do what I ask them to do when I ask them to do it.

 

Meaning: I don't have any set chores for them. Just, "Hey guys! Put those toys back in your room!" when I happen to notice a mess.

 

It's so tiring training up these younglings! Gotta always be on the ball pushing them forward into self-sufficiency.

[katilac]

Have you tried breakfast first, then chores? Some kids (well, some people!) just don't do the rarin' to go thing as well as others, and a simple adjustment might make life go more smoothly.

 

It doesn't have to mean starting the day later; just have breakfast earlier, end it at a set time, and a set amount of time to do the quick morning chores.

 

Or, do the cleanup later in the day, but not right before bedtime. After evening cleanup, have a rule that only certain toys can be taken out.

 

If you adjust the schedule with no improvement, then you'll have a better idea that it's a disciplinary issue.

[abreakfromlife]

I think the important thing is to think about how you and your kiddos work best. For some families, it feels great to get it all out of the way early. For others, that would be almost tortue.

 

LOL. That's part of my problem.......I have 2 early risers who have loads of energy first thing in the morning (until it comes to work), and then dd who is like me and is not a morning person and takes awhile to get up and get moving.

 

If you adjust the schedule

haha......first I have to make a schedule to be able to adjust it. lol.

[dirty ethel rackham]

I haven't read the other responses. I don't care if my kids get their chores done before or after breakfast, as long as they complete their morning routine (which includes chores) by my deadline. My kids need to eat in order to function. Also, breakfast is self-serve around her (all my kids know how to make what they want - including cooking eggs.) Big things like pancakes or waffles are a weekend-only deal:).

 

I, personally, would have trouble with chores before I eat. The only reason why I do anything before I eat is that I take meds where I need to wait at least an hour before the meal. I exercise first thing. If my med schedule allowed me to eat first, boy howdie, I would.