I'm looking for some too. Last January I desperately needed an underwear overhaul, so I bought a bunch from Victoria's Secret, because that was THE place to get them when I was late teens/early 20s (that or Jockey). Out of 10 or 12 pairs, 3-4 just fell apart within a few months. Two unravelled where the elastic is sewn in, and one or two split open along a seam. Most of the rest are looking shabby, with the exception of the solid-color cotton ones with lace trim. I'm wearing the correct size and taking reasonably good care of them. They're just not built like they used to be.

Cold brew might be a nice introduction to coffee for you. It's smoother, less acidic, and potentially less irritating to the tummy. You can dilute it to your preferred strength, or use milk or cream to dilute it. Very drinkable hot or cold. DH's cousin worked in a coffee shop when we got married and gave us a cold brew system as a wedding gift. IIRC that's how DH started appreciating coffee, and now he'll drink all kinds of coffee. But he's by no means a coffee addict, or in it just for the milk and sugar (for crying out loud, Hive!). You don't need to buy the official cold brew setup, unless you find it more convenient. My MIL cobbled something together from Pinterest and it works just fine. I've mostly given up coffee because it was getting hard on my tummy, and I've returned to tea, my first love. :)

We always do cheese fondue.

Good for you! I've decided that if I'm going to be The Keeper Of The Stuff, in terms of sorting, organizing, cleaning, hounding others to pick-up, etc, then I darn well deserve a larger say in which Stuff we're going to Keep.

This is why I haven't gotten a dog yet. I know that I'm not in a place in life to train it properly, and I loathe badly-behaved dogs. We used to have neighbors who regularly let their Alaskan Malamute chase our small children. We tried talking to them about it, but they blew us off and said they couldn't help it, they had five kids. So what did they do? Got another Alaskan Malamute and had another kid. SMH. You're the owner. Figure.It.Out. And don't even get me started on my relatives and their nasty little yippy dogs who are rewarded with treats for bad behavior ('cause the poor little dears are acting out because they need love and attention), and are allowed and encouraged to urinate and defecate indoors because it's easier than taking them outside.

Normally I try to show my kids what death looks like, what grief looks like, what community ritual looks like, etc, as it naturally comes up in our lives. I believe it takes away some of the fear of the unknown, because someday they will have to deal directly with it. But that is NOT what's going on here. Your mom wants your kids trapped 24/7 in a grieving stranger's face, with no private space, no place to retire to when it's too much. I think that would freak anyone out, and probably affect the kids for a long time. I wouldn't want my kids to get it into their heads that wishing you were dead is a normal response to death. And finally, people who are in deep grief can sometimes do really off-the-wall things. They don't need to be exposed to any of this. Definitely do a hotel or similar.

Mostly Goodwill because it's quick and convenient, although they can be picky. There's also the Habitat for Humanity store. They're a lot father away from me, but they accepted things that Goodwill wouldn't take (curtains and a whole bunch of light fixtures), at a time when I had to get them out of the house ASAP. I keep meaning to bring old towels and blankets to an animal shelter, but when push comes to shove, it winds up at Goodwill because of their proximity and hours. Maybe one of these days... Curbside works well around here, as long as the quality is reasonable. And my city does "large item pick-up" every other week, which I think is the best. Drag your stuff out to the curb the night before trash collection, and if a neighbor or metal scrapper don't take it, the city does. I'll be honest: I just don't have the brain space to care and research about every company's specific business practices. I do have some pet causes that I'm passionate about, but the operation of Goodwill isn't one of them.

What a stinky way to end Christmas. I can only echo what others say: let your DH handle it. It sounds like he's at the end of his rope. Now, there is a type of person who goes around cutting people off left and right, but it doesn't sound like he's that type. Regular people don't cut off family for no reason. That he's been pushed that far, and especially since he already knows the pain of going no-contact, says a lot. Sometimes it's possible to maintain cousin contact even when the parents aren't getting along. Maybe you and your SIL can have occasional play dates at a neutral location.

One of my kids gave me a battery in an old earring box, a handful of marbles, and a couple lumps of wax. He's been planning this gift and putting it together since June or so. 😄 I feel really happy with how our gifting went this year. When we decluttered over the summer I paid a lot of attention to what DH actually likes and needs, so my gifts to him were better than usual, even if IMO a little boring and utilitarian. I got a very long strand of irregular multi-colored pearls that I can wrap around my neck a few times. So pretty! I can't stop looking at all those unique beauties. And a new bullet journal and pen. What a lovely way to spend Christmas afternoon, drawing next year's calendars and planning out my whole year. The hugglepod was a huge hit with the kids, along with rubber band guns and nerf guns. My kid who likes snaps circuits and radios was thrilled with the snap circuit radio kit. My girl loves her new baby doll, fairies, and unicorn. We had an all-around great time.

What if you go to the small church by yourself (or with whichever family members would like to come too) once or twice a month. To feed your soul. After a while of doing that you can decide if you want to make it more permanent or not. Side note: I once kind of got burned by a tiny church. It was suffocating to have everyone on top of you, knowing you so well, nosing into your business and considering it their "Christian duty" to personally check up on you. It was a highly self-selected group that attracted certain types and after a while I felt like I was on a runaway crazy train. Different churches have different dynamics, and small church dynamics are different from large church dynamics. I'm surprised to find myself happier in the anonymity of my large church. Introvert that I am, it's somehow actually easier to focus on Christ.

On the one hand, duh. On the other, I was horrified when I came home to find that the babysitter had put the adult-sized teething necklace on my crawling age baby. I had even told her beforehand, this goes on you, while you're holding the baby. I'm all for raising awareness.

I'll just chime in that my special needs kid has really thrived in school. I was so worried that the stress of it would exacerbate his behaviors. And while it is stressful, it's also broadening (to use Patty Joanna's excellent word), it's structured to the point where he never acts out, and it leaves me free to just be Mom, which has improved our relationship. All of his relationships have improved. I mention it just because the situations you describe would be a non-issue in a B&M school. There would simply be no option to do it. At the very least that buys you (and the kids who are expected to "babysit" him) 8+ hours, and then maybe that would help you relax about after-school screen time. I know you're worried about bad influences at school. But at 14 the fact is that you don't have much control over him for much longer, anyway. He's growing up and spreading his wings no matter what. I wouldn't give away his personal property, either. I don't think that accomplishes anything at his age. It's not like he's a toddler and it's a toy that's causing problems, so you're going to put it in out of reach for a little while. Good luck with everything. I know you're in a difficult place.

If you don't need the table for eating, I'd replace it with a comfy sofa or chair, then add a rug, side table or coffee table, cozy blanket, maybe some bookshelves.

I don't know if that's a good price or not. I got my 6 quart pot in July for $49, which I think was a record low. I like it for making hard boiled eggs, because the shells peel off so easily. And for stock, because it goes quickly and doesn't leave the house smelling for hours on end. I also use it for cooking large batches of meat, like chicken or pork. I sear it, pressure cook in liquid, then shred and freeze. It's also nice for pot roasts and such. Oh, and beans and lentils. I've also used it to steam larger veggies like beets. One of these days I'm going to try yogurt - I used to have a yogurt maker but it didn't survive my last kitchen purge, because I didn't use it much. I've only made a couple of full meals in it, so I can't really answer if it makes everything taste the same. I would caution you that veggies cook at different rates, and usually faster than meats, so pay attention to times or you'll wind up with mushy stuff. Honestly, I kind of forgot about my instant pot for the last couple of months. Part of it was that life got crazy and looking up special instant pot recipes is more work. I'm also an experienced cook and sometimes when life is hectic it's just easier to go with what you know, rather than experiment with a new doohicky. Ironically, during the time I forgot about using it, I was eating a lot of instant pot meat out of the freezer. 😄 I know a lot of people who rave about it and call it a game changer, but if you're already a good and experienced cook, you probably already make things that are just as delicious. I kind of suspect that those people just don't know a lot about cooking technique, and/or needed some inspiration, kwim? For someone who already cooks a lot, the instant pot really shines when it saves you time. So if it's likely to help with meals your family already enjoys, it might be worth it. For what I get out of it, I think the money I paid was worth it.

Should be fine, just keep an eye out for mold. When I was in Europe, the family I lived with would buy a wedge of cheese each week and keep it on the kitchen counter in a special cheese dish with a clear glass lid.

I once did that with a kazoo I bought on Amazon. Stupid thing didn't work! Neither did the replacement. Then my toddler came along and was just tooting away on it. I had never realized, after years of playing various woodwind and brass instruments, that you're supposed to hum into them.

I think it all depends on the backstory. I could also see it being an issue of family culture. In my family of origin, and some church events, potlucks are the norm. In other circles, a dinner provided entirely by the host is the norm. I could see a potluck person bringing food because, in her mind, that's just what one does. Although the amount and variety mentioned in the OP, I don't think that's what's going on here.

The inside of our washer is stainless steel and never gets gunky. We use a gel detergent, and I think it gets pretty hot in there. We don't have hard water. I don't know which factor or combination of factors keeps it clean.

Even if there are no secrets, there can be a lot of trauma, and I think you're missing the trauma side of this. I won't go into the details, because it's someone else's story, but I have personally witnessed the trauma of being the one that Mom decided not to keep. This was an open adoption, from birth. There were no secrets whatsoever. Just believe me when I say that this kid is deeply, deeply traumatized. There is no way, after seeing what I've seen, that I'd dig this up. Especially being so far removed from the situation.

I could do it. I've only had a smart phone for two years. Sure, it's convenient for taking pictures and checking email, or as a TV remote when the real remote goes missing (which happens a lot - my kids shove it in the cracks of our sectional couch to hide it from one another. Today I decided they were no longer allowed to use my phone. If they want to watch TV they can gosh-darn hunt out that remote for themselves!). I've used the GPS maybe two or three times in the past year. I greatly prefer sitting down with a good map and getting totally comfortable with the route and how it fits in with the rest of the city. I never use the internet on it because I'd probably wind up distracted while I'm supposed to be watching the kids. That's not a lot to give up. But I'm not about to go through whatever song and dance publicity stunts they have in mind for a chance at winning the money. Not worth it.

I know a lot of families who have all sorts of silly fun with EOTS. And good for them! It's just not my thing, though. I like a quiet, simple Christmas, which is increasingly difficult as my kids get bigger and more involved in the community. There's a lot more saying "no" this time of year, just to maintain sanity. I don't need an elf on my plate, as well. We do Santa, but in a really casual, don't-care-if-we're-found-out way. I was another kid who believed for way too long and was scarred by it. OTOH I think if you go about it right it can be harmless fun. We gently start introducing the concept of Santa being a fun game that we're all in on. All of which is to say: we're not going to go out of our way to invent "proofs" of his existence.

Do they drive? If so, then maybe some winter gear for their cars. Scraper, regular blanket and/or foil emergency blanket, flashlight, first aid kit. In college I knew someone with a mini collapsible shovel. It really came in handy in snow storms, or when snow plows trucks left huge piles around his car.

This thread inspired me to tackle the last couple areas in the house that needed a good decluttering. I also went through my baby boxes again. That just leaves the garage...Lord help us!

We were once at an aquarium far from home that turned out to have a reciprocity agreement with our local zoo. We were kicking ourselves for not bringing our membership card. But the nice people at the front desk actually let us call our zoo and verify to the aquarium that we were members. I think it saved us $60. Never hurts to ask!

We're meeting my parents at Disney, but staying in a house off site. Enjoy your trip!