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  2. I actually think your new job sounds adventurous and exciting! Flying to meet clients! Learning new programs!! A boss who is flexible about your responsibilities!! I feel like you can really steer this career and relationship with your new boss - he’s not entirely sure what he needs, and you are new, so you do what you can do and be bold and strong with your boundaries and plans. Set the stage now for who you are and how you respond to guidance and wishy-washy plans... from reading your posts over the years, I can see that you are a natural leader and planner and very creative. A very small organization has tremendous potential for growth and leadership and formulating your own path in a way that a “normal” library type job doesn’t. I would recommend not burning down this bridge yet. You were drawn to this career change for a reason. Give yourself 3 months. If it’s a disaster, you will know within 2 months and you can start applying for jobs back in the field where you have been comfortable. But it sounds like there’s a good chance that after 3 months, you will have found your footing and will be a huge asset to your new team. I can’t wait to hear all about it. PS - there’s no growth without a little fear and mess!
  3. I would jump into the new job and take it from there. You've resigned from the old job and it sounds like a bit of a sinking ship anyway. The onboarding stuff is not unusual. If you start with the new job, you will gain new skills and experience and substantially raise your baseline of pay. Stay there long enough to do that and to decide where you will draw the line on clients and such in the future. I'm not clear on what you do (last I recall was tutoring, lol) but unless you work for yourself you will never have control of the client list. Unless you gain experience, you will never work for yourself. It does not help to scope out the client list of a potential employer beforehand, because of course they are always trying to gain new clients. Only you can decide if potentially working with certain clients is a dealbreaker. If it is, then I'd say you need to reconsider pursuing this type of job, simply because it is something you will have no control over. If there are certain firms where you can be confident they will never accept those clients, due to their mission statement or such, then you can start working towards that as a long-term goal. This job could be a valuable stepping stone to getting there. Quitting the new job is going to put you in a bad position. I'm not saying not to do it, just to be aware that it's probably going to be a step back for you.
  4. Oh dear, I'm so sorry for your poor puppy girl!
  5. The vet called me at noon today to say that she wanted Winnie to be brought back in to stay overnight. Her liver enzymes are elevated -- three of the four are twice as high as normal. They are giving her IV fluids and antibiotics and running more tests. She says that elevated liver enzymes suggests she may have eaten something toxic, but we can't think of anything. She is always on a leash when she goes outside. If not that, it could indicate a portosystemic liver shunt, so they are testing for that. I've been googling, and what I read is not especially encouraging. I hope it's not the diagnoses that we get. But part of me thinks it may happen, since we doubt she has ingested something. I'm preparing myself to hear bad news but hoping for good when the vet calls sometime tomorrow.
  6. And it's not just that! Many kids coming off their meds will have a transition time, maybe 30-45 minutes, that are pretty ugly. I couldn't imagine dealing with that if the dc did not have the cognitive/coping skills to do that safely. It's a huge issue. And I'm so glad your dc have made progress! My ds has made progress too, but with these kids sometimes it's counter-intuitive how you do it and very slow. People's first instinct, when they deal with something this hard, is to want to go in, SWOOP, and make it all better, when sometimes you have to be very patient with incremental progress, looking at it and saying well it's still bad and not want we want, but our data show it's getting BETTER. So like with my ds, we were looking for shorter times for recovery, not zero, less of something we wanted to extinguish, that kind of thing. And, you know, I hadn't really pondered it in a while, but he seldom comes up to me anymore and tries to engage physically to calm himself. That was a really dangerous stage. And even if we had used psychotropics, that wouldn't have dealt with the underlying issues, both biomedical and with his understanding of how to regulate himself. Now he does safer things, like breaking things in his room. THAT we can deal with. We might not like it, but he makes much safer choices now and understands. And it took a long time and doing stuff that people thought was maybe counterintuitive or not really addressing it. I don't know when you got your team, but I think we've had ours 3 or 4 years now. I lose track. But yeah, they all view it as long-haul like that, not a fast fix kinda thing. It's just the degree of the problem and what it takes.
  7. Okay, I'm going to buck the trend and say that one of my FAVORITE childhood holiday dishes was the esteemed "Pink Salad." Raspberry or strawberry jello, mayo, cream cheese, crushed pineapple, Cool Whip, and walnuts, whipped up into a "fluff" and chilled. I still can eat massive quantities of it if I let myself. If I know my mom is going to make it, I'll sometimes pass along some vegan, dye-free gelatin. And my grandma's red jello, with mandarin oranges, pineapple, grapes, bananas, and sometimes (I think) mini-marshmallows suspended in it, topped with Cool Whip. Lovely. 🙂
  8. Well I think I'm more confused than when I started this thread, lol! Maybe I'll narrow it down a bit by putting them in categories and cross things I've decided against. Things I have already: Math mammoth and Math lessons for a living education (mlfle) Free options: MEP, Arithmetic village, Buy: TGAB K, Saxon, Right start, Miquon, R&S, Horizons, Things that are important to me: Games, real life math, some drill, review, and not too expensive. It seems like these fit what I want that I haven't crossed off: TGAB, Saxon, mlfle (with some tweaking). I'll have to think about this as I'm back where I started, sigh.
  9. And yes, I’m going to take her to the doctor this week. I’ll call for an appointment in the morning. I’m posting here hoping someone else has been through this, so I know what to expect. She’s 18. Over the past year, several times she has complained about tender, swollen lymph nodes. I’ve read that it’s not uncommon for this to happen to teens, but she keeps getting them. Today she told me she has a swollen node in each armpit. First time she’s had two at once. She says she feels fine. She hasn’t been ill recently. She did have the flu several weeks ago but no secondary infections from it. Anyway, after she told me about the 2 today, I’m a little worried. Trying so hard not to Google this!
  10. As an introvert, and someone who does not love shopping, I can relate. I do think, however, it would be nice to accept the invitation. Dress shopping sounds special to her, and it is nice that she has included you in as someone to be there to share that special time with her. If I had any concern that there were going to be many more invitations to share in her special times and it was turning into an intolerable self-centered bride-to-be focus, I would much rather politely decline some of those later invitations. (I have known mothers-of-the-groom to be invited on bridesmaid bonding trips, etc.) This seems like an activity, while not enjoyable, can be participated in somewhat quietly.
  11. He is risen indeed! 2 Corinthians 5:21 He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him. So grateful that we serve such a holy God who gave His greatest gift, Jesus, who paid the ultimate sacrifice to purchase our salvation and to restore fellowship with Himself. What wondrous love is this, O my soul! He is alive!
  12. There are behavior plans where that happens too. But no, actual physical restraint is pretty common in schools, and I'm surprised they aren't doing it in your country. Maybe they are and it's just a different classroom from what you've been told about? My ds has an IEP with the ps, and he would be placed in an ED classroom where both ways are the norm (restraint and having everyone else leave). There are a lot of issues with it, so I'm not saying I like that. There was an autism school that we otherwise liked that we totally turned down because they were so pro-restraint. It's a pretty hot-button thing in the disability community here I guess. Maybe that's why people are responding so strongly to that word? Yes, I would have had to sign papers agreeing to restraint to enroll my ds in school. I can't think of ANY school prepared to handle his level of disability that would not use restraint. They all would here. It's a reason people pull their kids out, because the dc start to see out the fights of the restraint to get the sensory input. Totally perverse, sigh.
  13. Are you on ranitidine or another H2 blocker? (Ranitidine is available OTC as Prilosec). It blocks a different type of histamine, and along with a regular antihistamine, like Zyrtec, is more effective against hives than just an H1 blocker. Prescription hydroxine stops itching pretty well, but really can only be taken at night because will knock most people out (it is used for pre-operative anxiety for that reason).
  14. she knew enough they didn't always live in the same house because the one the children were in was so filthy. the baby was actually treated well. she knew the difference. and they were taking the chains off the three kids who were chained up when they realized Jordan had escaped. (they'd gotten the chains off of two when the cops arrived.) there are rumors of s3xual abuse of some of the girls in my grandmothers family. while I can feel sorry for her experiences as a child - she was an *adult* when she did what she did to the next generation. that doesn't excuse the damage she did to her daughter or grandchildren, she CHOSE to treat us this way.
  15. If you're looking for a whole color scheme: SW Sea Salt semi gloss enamel on doors BM White Opulence OC-69 (white) or BM Cotton Tail 2155-70 (ivory) for trim BM Revere Pewter for walls. In a very dark room perhaps BM light pewter.
  16. Like Stacia, we bought white bowls at Crate & Barrel to accompany our china (in our case one of the Dansk Bistro patterns). We've had our bowls for twenty plus years and have lost only one of twelve due to dropping. Regards, Kareni
  17. Ha, we used to have that too, I remember that name! Also known as 'chipped beef', but I wonder to this day what kind of meat it really was, or if it was real at all. My mom would make it out of 2 small packages and slice it up. City chicken anyone? Again, what kind of meat was that? It was on a popsicle stick! And pickle and bologna sandwiches, no thank you! Gosh, what our parents did to make the food bill stretch. I must admit, idk how they did it with such a large family. However, I do love a good pot of simmering pinto beans!
  18. Oh I added pencils with crosses (plenty came in the package), too and noticed one of the bigger kids took home a pencil and notebook when I told her she could get something. I mainly had her in mind when I got the notepads. Dd didn’t care about eating out and only wanted to rush home to paint so we painted as soon as we got home from lunch lol
  19. (((hugs))) I'm not even religious and didn't enjoy the day. I didn't go home as I have a ton of school work, so I went to IKEA thinking it would lift my mood - and I wanted meatballs. I live in an area of fancy restaurants and shops (not that I can afford them, but...) and families were waiting to eat, women in their pretty dresses. Then at IKEA couples were shopping together and I felt really alone. I miss being a couple with someone.
  20. I didn't bring extra candy/snacks for the box after all. I decided whatever we have leftover come Tuesday (when Dh returns to work) can just go to his work. The college kids/staff can eat it. My kids went to a birthday party Saturday and they did an egg hunt there. The other families couldn’t remember if they had offered to bring eggs or not and ds’ Sunday school teacher brought some with money. I think it worked out practically perfectly because the kids got a variety, no one got an overkill number of eggs and they could just share with cousins or siblings if they had too much (the smaller kids hunted and bigger kids hid. Three families were related and all going to eat at a family members’ home after church. The big kids were going to get to hunt at a family egg hunt and ds got to hunt at the birthday party). I put Starburst Duos in a few eggs. Those were a good fit. My kiddo didn’t seem to get an egg with the word prize but the other kids didn’t claim all the prizes and I offered the items but they didn’t take them all so dd got something she really wanted. It was a sun catcher paint set but the darn paint was like play doh consistency so we couldn’t use it. Luckily I have a stash of nearly every acrylic paint color here so we were fine. Hope the little boy that got a paint set had better paint!
  21. Contributing? Yes, but the definition of contributing can definitely vary. Healthy and happy? There will probably be a mix. Some will be upstanding citizens but perhaps with poor coping mechanisms. Others will be addicts to avoid the issues. Others will likely have kids taken into foster care themselves. Some will find something disciplined, possibly a religion that's very structured and discourages free thinking, that will make them feel more stable and safe. A rare few will go through a few tough years of adjustment and then go on to be remarkably amazing adults. It's sort of like how the happiest people I've ever met were refugees from African genocide. I guess once you live through hell on earth everything else is the small stuff.
  22. How neat! My view of accurate probably isn’t very accurate or realistic but I do enjoy Amish mysteries. A couple of years after we moved to England there was a reality show where several Amish teens came to live in England which was followed by British teens living with Amish families in the US. It was extremely popular and I spent hours fielding questions because I was American and I had read all sorts of fictional books. My mom and I had a good time trying to figure out the answers! So here’s some favorites: Kate Burkholder https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6115138-sworn-to-silence?ac=1&from_search=true These are NOT cozies, definitely adult content and should be read in order because of an ongoing storyline. @JennW in SoCal discovered these years ago and I love them. The main character left her Amish family under grim circumstances and returns the area as the chief of police. Marta Perry’shttps://www.goodreads.com/series/56307 I think I have read these. While my kids were little I subscribed to the Love Inspired Suspense series which frequently had books featuring Amish characters and I remember Marta Perry as being a favorite author from that time but have no records. I just checked my Overdrive for Love Inspired suspense and discovered quite a few are available so I checked one out to try, Plain Secrets by Kat Wilkinson https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/13545607-plain-secrets?ac=1&from_search=true. It’s been awhile! This is one of my favorites that I have kept. Karen Harperhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/373455.Dark_Road_Home. I believe Karen Harper has some other similar series I haven’t liked them as well. If you try any of these please let me know what you think.
  23. I'm what I assume is combination type...I was classified as inattentive because the obvious issues related to not being able to focus, not being able to sustain focus, motivation issues, etc. I was the kid in class who never had a pencil or paper or textbook. Maybe I'd remember one of those, but never all three. Even if I went to my locker. Even if I finally remembered to tell my parents to buy me more paper. It would sit in my backpack/locker/desk at home/whatever. I'd do the homework, but lose it or forget to turn it in. Or have the due date wrong. Lost my purse so many times it was ridiculous. My DH, when we were dating, carried a copy of my license because I would constantly lose or forget to bring it when we went out. More than once I've shown up at a store or restaurant and realized as I got out of the car that I was not wearing shoes. I couldn't focus on a conversation long enough to notice someone's name. As in, they would introduce themselves and as they were saying their name my mind had already wandered. And at that point you can't ask them to say it again, they JUST said it a few minutes ago! This was almost EVERY time I met someone. It had a huge impact on my social life, anxiety, etc. After all, why bother to try to make friends if you won't remember them anyway? A few days after starting medication I went to a company function with DH. I always dread these, and hate them. I didn't realize how much of that was due to social anxiety over this problem until an hour into the event when I realized I remembered all 7 people I'd met!!! I remembered their names!!! I seriously starting texting friends, bragging about this, and listing off all the names. So yeah, inattentive for sure, lol. The meds let me focus on the conversation long enough to hear the name,. But certainly don't make it so I HAVE to focus on things. I just CAN focus on things. Later, we realized I'm also impulsive, just not physicaly so. But I do things like adopt hound dog puppies while 7 months pregnant, lol. In school I got in trouble for chatting in class, A LOT. Every day. And I really really really tried to be quiet while the teacher was talking, but couldn't control myself, couldn't wait and just share whatever I wanted to say later. And later, as an adult, I would yell, lose my temper (not violent, just easily frustrated) and the meds let me control that, they give me MUCH more patience. Not sedated, just more able to see the big picture, not be overwhelmed by the immediacy of the emotion. Which all seems to be in the impulsive category. So I guess that makes me combined, my son is very similar. I have friends that are inattentive mostly, and others that are both. None mention anything like what you are describing...I wouldn't accept that either!
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