newborns and bedding

[chocolate-chip chooky]

I'm trying to help my pregnant eldest daughter. This will be her first child and my first grandchild. We've been looking at nursery furniture together, and we're both a bit overwhelmed at the range of options and all the pros and cons of each.

What are your experiences with cots vs bassinets vs Moses baskets etc?  Ideally, she'd like her baby to be within arm's reach during the night, but not in her bed. 

What have you used for your newborn to be in and near you when you're doing things around the house? 

Thank you 🌻

 

 

[Shoeless]

I used a bassinet until DS outgrew it. It had wheels on the legs so I could easily move it around, plus a storage basket underneath for diapers, wipes, extra bedding and sleepers. I liked the bassinet because I'd had a c-section and needed to sleep semi upright on the sofa for a while, and I wanted to keep the baby near me. We had a crib set up, (a giant wooden thing), but with my short height and the c section, it would have been hard to get baby DS in and out. 

FYI, I discovered that standard pillowcases fit the little bassinet mattress, so I didn't need to buy lots of expensive bassinet sheets. I just popped pillowcases on and off when the sheets were in the wash. 

Edited September 4, 2023 by Shoeless

[kbutton]

We had something like this, but it was more round, and the mesh completely closed up and wasn’t a desperate piece.

I can’t remember what it was called. 
https://statloveov.live/product_details/1823843.html

Edited September 4, 2023 by kbutton

[Elizabeth86]

I used the arms reach co sleeper with some of mine and liked that very much. I used a graco pack n play with one and I liked that too. I got the one with a changing table that people on the internet said was useless and I’m glad because I loved the changer feature. Cribs were useless at my house. Most of mine ended up in bed with me anyway.

This was what we got and I love it. https://www.target.com/p/graco-pack-39-n-play-travel-dome-deluxe-playard-allister/-/A-76908017#lnk=samet

 

This was good too. https://www.armsreach.com/collections/co-sleeper-bassinets/products/mini-ezee-3-in-1-co-sleeper

Edited September 4, 2023 by Elizabeth86

[Momof4sweetkids]

I like the Pack and Plays where the mat can be raised up close to the top (like this  https://a.co/d/3K0ubDn ) then before baby is rolling I can set up one side with diapers and wipes and he can sleep on the other side. DS is 4 months and has been sleeping in it since birth next to my bed. I also have a little travel bassinet that's more compact but don't use it often. In my kitchen I have a bouncer ("infant to toddler rocker") that he sits in a lot. He will not be able to use it once he's rolling more. He naps in it too but I think that's against guidelines? 

[Melissa in Australia]

My Dd used a cot that was adjustable. She had it on a high setting when the baby was little and lowered it as he grew. 

[Rosie_0801]

Make sure you use crocheted blankets so the Bub can't suffocate if the wriggle down. Dd nearly died that way.

[Clarita]

For sleeping I used the pack n play with the mat raised up. It was a hand me down and worked great.

For around the house, my favorite was the baby k'tan. https://babyktan.com/ I liked that the k'tan was sized to me so I just easily popped the baby in and was ready to go. (I'm petit so the one size fits all wraps would take forever for me.)

For our and about I had the lillebaby. 

The baby carriers depend so much on your shape on which one you would choose. IMO there isn't a perfect one for all. Also my first never liked going in the sling. He would rather explore on the floor. So I got a large foam mat for him. Even the most most active babies it takes a month before they get anywhere. After that I put up a fence thing around the mat, until they are able to pull it down.

[Elizabeth86]

I missed the part about baby wearing. I love my ergo. 

[Carol in Cal.]

I used a sling around the house for my newborn.  Then when she was about a month or two old I switched to the Baby Bjorn, which was awesome—very secure and cozy, and hands free.  Then the sling was helpful as a side carrier again when she was a toddler—I’d sit her in it on one of my hips, with one leg on each side of me, and one of my arms around her, and it made it much easier to carry her around for long distances than just using my arm.  That’s about it.  

[KungFuPanda]

We have a pack n play for our grandson that we use at our house. We used the bassinet and the changing table a LOT but he outgrew the bassinet quickly. Last time he stayed (a few weeks ago) he used the elevated sleeping surface that covers the full perimeter of the playpen. Next time he visits we’re going to have to drop the floor all the way down. He’s six months old and got so mobile so quickly! At home they used a co-sleeper until about 5 months then transitioned him to his crib. All of these gadgets were very useful but the window to use them is so very short. 
 

They use a baby monitor to watch him when he’s sleeping and they’re in another room. 

[Clarita]

Don't spend too much money on that first sleeping situation it only lasts a few months. 

[kbutton]

15 hours ago, Momof4sweetkids said:

In my kitchen I have a bouncer ("infant to toddler rocker") that he sits in a lot. He will not be able to use it once he's rolling more. He naps in it too but I think that's against guidelines? 

The one I had with my first was no all that robust. My mom had the infant to toddler rocker type at her house, and he liked it so much better. We got one for number 2. It was a great purchase.

I didn’t do well with wraps and carriers—they hurt me (hips or shoulders) or were too hot. I held my first on my hip a LOT and really whacked out my back, but it was that or listen to him scream—boredom, frustration, etc. 

Mine also liked their exersaucer. I had to keep moving them from thing to thing often because they got bored or felt left out of what I was doing.

I had alert babies who didn’t sleep much and did not want to be confined because they couldn’t see what was going on. My first was amazingly mobile early; he rolled over at two weeks (the hard way first!), and it just accelerated from there. We later identified convergence issues with his vision, and in hindsight, those slowed him down a bit with walking, but he still walked at 9 months after weeks of using one finger on the wall while he walked around. I don’t want to know what he might’ve been doing had he been endowed with perfectly functional depth perception from the get go. 

Anyway, all that to say that some babies are different in case this mum encounters uncharted waters—if so, it’s not likely her imagination. In those cases, I recommend buying a range of things secondhand and just tossing it all up against the wall to see what works.

[wathe]

1 hour ago, Clarita said:

Don't spend too much money on that first sleeping situation it only lasts a few months. 

Agree.  We re-purposed a plastic laundry basket.   Lined the bottom with a well-fitted piece of firm foam.   

That was for a portable bed to move about the house and take out onto the deck. We also had a proper crib.

 

Edited September 4, 2023 by wathe

[wathe]

1 hour ago, Clarita said:

Don't spend too much money on that first sleeping situation it only lasts a few months. 

I'm also reminded of the Finnish baby box - a package of baby care items provided by the Finnish government; the box it all comes in is meant to be used as a baby bed.

Why Finnish Babies Sleep in Cardboard Boxes (BBC)

Edited September 4, 2023 by wathe

[chocolate-chip chooky]

1 hour ago, wathe said:

Agree.  We re-purposed a plastic laundry basket.   Lined the bottom with a well-fitted piece of firm foam.   

That was for a portable bed to move about the house and take out onto the deck. We also had a proper crib.

 

We went out looking for a cot or bassinet the other day, and only came home with a new laundry basket, so this made me laugh.

 

[chocolate-chip chooky]

1 hour ago, wathe said:

I'm also reminded of the Finnish baby box - a package of baby care items provided by the Finnish government; the box it all comes in is meant to be used as a baby bed.

Why Finnish Babies Sleep in Cardboard Boxes (BBC)

Wow. Go Finland!

[chocolate-chip chooky]

Thanks everyone. I appreciate all the input and ideas, and I'll be passing it on to my daughter.

[Faith-manor]

Our daughter kept a co sleeper crib thing attached to her side of the bed. So baby wasn't in their bed, but if she needed to, she could sleep with a hand right there on baby. She could slide him over to nurse, then tuck him back in without ever leaving the bed.

She also had a Moses basket because she spends a lot of time outdoors when the weather is nice. She liked tucking him in, pulling the sun shield up, and then leaving him nearby while she worked in the garden. The Moses basket was so cute...dino themed. I loved using it with little T, and carried him all over the big yard, set him down, and then fertilizer fruit trees and pulled weeds or helped his older brothers pick blueberries. Little man was very cozy in there.

[kbutton]

Oh, for those having baby in the same room…that might necessitate sleeping separately from dad. My husband could not sleep in the same room—he would toss and turn all night sure that the baby needed something. For years after having littles, he still had nightmares where I would wake up to him patting my back like he was soothing a baby back to sleep rather desperately (these were extremely unpleasant dreams for him). I think we had a baby in our room for a matter of a week or two, and it effected him that much. For years. 

Again just trying to help de stigmatize the more atypical and difficult experiences—if we talk about them, someone can feel more normal if this happens to them.

[Halftime Hope]

15 minutes ago, kbutton said:

Oh, for those having baby in the same room…that might necessitate sleeping separately from dad. My husband could not sleep in the same room—he would toss and turn all night sure that the baby needed something. For years after having littles, he still had nightmares where I would wake up to him patting my back like he was soothing a baby back to sleep rather desperately (these were extremely unpleasant dreams for him). I think we had a baby in our room for a matter of a week or two, and it effected him that much. For years. 

Again just trying to help de stigmatize the more atypical and difficult experiences—if we talk about them, someone can feel more normal if this happens to them.

Poor Dad!

[Clarita]

3 hours ago, kbutton said:

The one I had with my first was no all that robust. My mom had the infant to toddler rocker type at her house, and he liked it so much better. We got one for number 2. It was a great purchase.

I didn’t do well with wraps and carriers—they hurt me (hips or shoulders) or were too hot. I held my first on my hip a LOT and really whacked out my back, but it was that or listen to him scream—boredom, frustration, etc. 

Mine also liked their exersaucer. I had to keep moving them from thing to thing often because they got bored or felt left out of what I was doing.

I had alert babies who didn’t sleep much and did not want to be confined because they couldn’t see what was going on. My first was amazingly mobile early; he rolled over at two weeks (the hard way first!), and it just accelerated from there. We later identified convergence issues with his vision, and in hindsight, those slowed him down a bit with walking, but he still walked at 9 months after weeks of using one finger on the wall while he walked around. I don’t want to know what he might’ve been doing had he been endowed with perfectly functional depth perception from the get go. 

Anyway, all that to say that some babies are different in case this mum encounters uncharted waters—if so, it’s not likely her imagination. In those cases, I recommend buying a range of things secondhand and just tossing it all up against the wall to see what works.

Walking by 6 months, you can guess how I know. Good news is 6 months is the earliest a baby can walk due to physical development. Climbed out and fell out of the crib at 9 months.

[chocolate-chip chooky]

38 minutes ago, kbutton said:

Oh, for those having baby in the same room…that might necessitate sleeping separately from dad. My husband could not sleep in the same room—he would toss and turn all night sure that the baby needed something. For years after having littles, he still had nightmares where I would wake up to him patting my back like he was soothing a baby back to sleep rather desperately (these were extremely unpleasant dreams for him). I think we had a baby in our room for a matter of a week or two, and it effected him that much. For years. 

Again just trying to help de stigmatize the more atypical and difficult experiences—if we talk about them, someone can feel more normal if this happens to them.

I'm so sorry this has been your experience, but I really appreciate you sharing this. Thank you.

[Halftime Hope]

On 9/3/2023 at 7:28 PM, chocolate-chip chooky said:

I'm trying to help my pregnant eldest daughter. This will be her first child and my first grandchild. We've been looking at nursery furniture together, and we're both a bit overwhelmed at the range of options and all the pros and cons of each.

What are your experiences with cots vs bassinets vs Moses baskets etc?  Ideally, she'd like her baby to be within arm's reach during the night, but not in her bed. 

What have you used for your newborn to be in and near you when you're doing things around the house? 

Thank you 🌻

 

 

We took the crib mattress and put it between the wall and my side of the bed, on a platform we had made out of the strong cardboard boxes that hold cases of copy paper, then a piece of thin plywood on top of that.  (The paper boxes for brand name paper tend to be stronger. I remember thinking I wasn't planning to support just the baby's weight, but also mine if I leaned over and put my weight on one hand on the crib mattress, and so on.) The crib mattress was the same height as our very firm mattress, and the two were jammed tightly together, so there was no way anything was falling between the mattresses and the wall or between the mattresses themselves. 

There is a lot that is marketed as being super safe for babies, and families ought to use this or that product, but I tend to think that common sense and everyday items that are at hand can work just as well...they have for millennia.

Our story was that nursing my first was a hard-won battle, taking about 6 weeks before babe was nursed strictly at the breast. (Subsequent babies were nursing champs, and I was a much more confident mama.) In my experience, it takes newborns and new moms awhile to learn to nurse well lying on their sides, especially since newborns need to learn to latch well. It may be a couple of weeks before a mom and baby can nurse on and off throughout the night without having mama need to get up -- at least sitting up -- and turn on a light.  It's really after baby learns side-lying nursing that the magic of co-sleeping really kicks in.

 

 

[Elizabeth86]

6 hours ago, kbutton said:

Oh, for those having baby in the same room…that might necessitate sleeping separately from dad. My husband could not sleep in the same room—he would toss and turn all night sure that the baby needed something. For years after having littles, he still had nightmares where I would wake up to him patting my back like he was soothing a baby back to sleep rather desperately (these were extremely unpleasant dreams for him). I think we had a baby in our room for a matter of a week or two, and it effected him that much. For years. 

Again just trying to help de stigmatize the more atypical and difficult experiences—if we talk about them, someone can feel more normal if this happens to them.

Poor guy. I don’t think any of my 5 had ever made dh lose a wink of sleep.