guess what happened in my 12yo middle school.

[mchel210]

There was a group of kids that joined the rainbow club. Have you heard of that? I didnt. It is when each girl puts on a different lipstick and goes to someone else and ...I wont say...but I think you can guess. Ughhh. My friend a teacher told me. Then yesterday I got a note home from the school that says please discuss with your children the appropriate places to have ___Relations and it shoudnt be in school. WHat?? I was told 2 boys and a girl had been expelled for this...and 2 teachers removed from classes as it occured in their classrooms. Hello??? What was that??? While they had been in the class teaching. UGhhh.

 

So I asked my son and he said a group of boys put there chairs in a circle around 1 girl...and he didnt know anymore. Im sure he has heard the whole story...but he said the teachers had been there. It was actually one of his classes that he had been switched out of.

 

What choice did I have but to have a little bit of a talk while waiting for the bus. I mean...I had to explain consequences of actions...especially on school grounds. Omgoodness. WHat a fun talk.

 

Can you believe this??? I have no clue what I am going to do with this kid for school> I am ready to pull him out. I may just do that. My girls are ok in Elementary...but I imagine they will get pulled out again in Middle school.

[NicksMama-Zack's Mama Too]

I would like to think that it was an exaggeration......

 

;-(

[mchel210]

I would too...but my hubby even told me he saw it on the news last night. It is online...wsvn7 ughhh....I just read it.

[Saille]

Ew. Just googled looking for news stories and found a facebook group. How big are your son's classroom sizes/how disrupted are they, that this could be going on *in class*? Holy moly. Is all your hair falling out?

[Starr]

Yes, this is for real and not an isolated case. You read and talk with people all over the country and they will tell you about it. I'm sorry you had to have such a lively discussion on such short notice. :)

[BabyBre]

I have no clue what I am going to do with this kid for school> I am ready to pull him out. I may just do that. My girls are ok in Elementary...but I imagine they will get pulled out again in Middle school.

 

 

O...M...G! I'm actually somewhat proud of having a notion of what kind of filth and debauchery is available to kids these days, but...in a classroom while the teacher was THERE! Are you kidding?! Essentially allowing this to happen! To 12-year-olds!!! Complete and utter outrage is what you're hearing in me! This little smiley doesn't do me justice! :cursing:

 

I have no intention (even before this story) of sending my dc to our 7th/8th middle school. Things were bad when I went there, and I can only imagine they're worse now. We may consider part-time enrollment in classes like music and art, but it's years away, so we'll have to see.

 

IMO, get your ds out of that toxic environment.

[BabyBre]

I almost hate to ask this, but can you post a link to the story? I couldn't find it on the news channel's web site. TIA.

[Tami]

I don't find this surprising at all. In our society, who is to say what is right or wrong anymore? Since kids are exposed to sexually charged television, images, music, and advertising, it's no wonder that their inhibitions are low.

 

I find it disturbing that these girls seem so anxious to please boys at all costs. Girls are being socialized to this. This is another topic, but is feminism dead? These days, girls seem to have no concept of their worth apart from their looks and their sexuality.

 

It is very sad to picture that young girl surrounded by a circle of boys, and to imagine what that young girl must ALREADY believe about herself. Heartbreaking.

[lionfamily1999]

I......... can't......... form........... reply..........

 

I love the way the school passed that buck to the parents. Didn't they make a big stink about teaching the kids sex ed because the parents weren't doing it? You would think "places you should not have s/r" would have been included in their curriculum. This is what happens when an entity decides it knows better and takes the responsibility from the parents.

[mchel210]

I almost hate to ask this, but can you post a link to the story? I couldn't find it on the news channel's web site. TIA.

http://www.sun-sentinel.com/community/news/miramar/sfl-flbglades1211sbdec11,0,3950863.story

 

http://www.miamiherald.com/news/broward/story/808107.html

 

You know...I did a search and it is all over the news even outside of Florida. Ughh.

[FO4UR]

Sorry this filth was brought into your family!!! I think I would seriously consider pulling your dc out of that system - just my .02

 

I've actually heard of this kind of thing happening quite a while ago. I can't imagine how a teacher could be clueless to this happening!!!!!:glare:

 

And, I don't care what the little girls SAYS...being surrounded by a GROUP of boys and ....um.....doing what she did is NOT something most little 12yo girls wake up in the morning and decides she wants to do that day. There has to some abuse/coersion going on there!:confused:

 

What REALLY bothers me is that this isn't a case of puppy-love gone too far, this is like gang - rape for middle schoolers! (no smiley could express how I feel about that)

[H.S. Burrow]

There was a group of kids that joined the rainbow club. Have you heard of that? I didnt. It is when each girl puts on a different lipstick and goes to someone else and ...I wont say...but I think you can guess. Ughhh. My friend a teacher told me. Then yesterday I got a note home from the school that says please discuss with your children the appropriate places to have ___Relations and it shoudnt be in school. WHat?? I was told 2 boys and a girl had been expelled for this...and 2 teachers removed from classes as it occured in their classrooms. Hello??? What was that??? While they had been in the class teaching. UGhhh.

 

So I asked my son and he said a group of boys put there chairs in a circle around 1 girl...and he didnt know anymore. Im sure he has heard the whole story...but he said the teachers had been there. It was actually one of his classes that he had been switched out of.

 

What choice did I have but to have a little bit of a talk while waiting for the bus. I mean...I had to explain consequences of actions...especially on school grounds. Omgoodness. WHat a fun talk.

 

Can you believe this??? I have no clue what I am going to do with this kid for school> I am ready to pull him out. I may just do that. My girls are ok in Elementary...but I imagine they will get pulled out again in Middle school.

 

It's sad to say, but this kind of stuff has been going on for years. This is exactly why my DC are homeschooled. We pulled the kids out of public school 3 years ago.

 

The things that I've heard from other parents and teachers in our district....well, you can imagine.

 

[elizam]

Doesn't surprise me. We put our then 7th grader in PS. I was appalled at al the s*xual stuff, even with the "good" kids (good grades, often "gifted", on all the sports teams and cheer squads)

 

My oldest was in PS kindergarten as well. He was propostioned by the neighbor girl and her cousin to have a little 3 way, 5 and 6yo style. :ohmy: Thsoe were some super troubled kids, though. Even their grandma had a live in boyfriend in the singlewide.

[Twinmom]

I can't say I'm surprised, either. I remember something similar going on in my science class when I was in 8th grade, right in front of the coach/teacher, who was clueless in general. I left the school after that year and moved on to private. Never told my parents or any authorities, though, so I can understand why the original girl who told kept quiet so long. No one wants to be the one who blabs, even if it is horrifying.

[Lovedtodeath]

Michelle, I am so sorry you have to deal with this. You obviously weighed your decision to put your DS into school carefully and now you are starting over again.

 

But yes, this was one of the reasons I wanted my DD out of school. One little girl that I babysat was talking about s*x in first grade, and she said that she had gotten all of her information there. :( This was a nice midwest neighborhood! It doesn't matter where you are anymore.

[SonshineLearner]

If you look at their s*x ed programs being discussed with their goals, even in our small community, you can understand why a child who is in a mixed gender class talking about s*x from when they are very little....that they would want to start trying something.... I mean...if they start in kindergarten, by the time they are 12, they've been talking about it for 7 years... I'm not against educating your own children about "family life" but a mixed gender class and talking about things in depth, doesn't promote modesty. (So, even in our small community, I've heard that students have been found in closets....) There seem to be no rules when you go visit the highschool here....about public affection....

Carrie:-)

[ack25]

OMG!

I have such nightmares about middle school. :grouphug:

[Julpost]

I must be incredibly naiive or somethings wrong w/me....I don't really understand what it is that the girls are doing. Anything I could imagine seems impossible in a class room.

 

And that's why it's a very good thing that we are homeschooling. Makes me think about when I was home after having ds #5 and was taking oxycodon for postpartum pain. I was talking to a friend of mine who has a son in high school. She told me to lock that stuff up, that it was a popular drug on the street and in the schools. I had NO idea what she was talking about. Boy, after talking to her, I felt like I had been living in a bubble-I seem to have very little concept of the outside world. Scary.

[EarleneW]

You would not believe the talk. My dd is in 2nd and the stuff she has come home and asked is unbelievable. We are pulling them back out after this week actually. This happens wayyyyy more then anyone would like to think.

[Tree House Academy]

Oh Ewww. Someone needs to really talk to kids about HIV in schools these days. I can't even imagine something like that happening whe I was in middle school...and I am only 29! I mean, we were thinking it was big to curse and not get caught...or to kiss a boy at the locker. My goodness...what an interesting and sad world this has become.

 

And honestly...I don't know many adults who would think it was even remotely cool to have oral relations with several men leaving rings of honor on their uh huh. Sick!

Edited January 14, 2009 by Tree House Academy

[hsmom]

now some places it is those colored plastic bracelets. I guess it is whatever color you are wearing you will do a certain act, I guess the goal is to get as many as you can. I just cannot believe that they do this and in schools.

[katemary63]

My middle daughter attended a wonderful elementary school in Kenosha, WI with a Christian principle. She had an idyllic experience there. Because my older 2 had attended our local Jr. High, I KNEW things were not going to be the same and so pulled her out. (My older son had told me after the fact that several girls had flashed him in the hallways during passing time!) We home schooled 6-8th grade during which time we moved to Dover, AR - a tiny little country town.

So she decides that she wants to go back to ps for HS and we agree. She attended there for 9th and half of 10th. During Christmas break she looks at me and says, "I'm not going back." What???? She loved many things about school. But she couldn't stand the debauchery! She said, "Those kids are disgusting! It is not a good environment for me." (She is graduating home school HS this May.)

During the time she was there, a couple of kids were suspended for having oral sex on the bleachers, in the gym, DURING AN ALL SCHOOL ASSEMBLY! He simply put his coat over his lap and she ducked her head underneath! My daughter tells me that this kind of activity is not at all uncommon on a DAILY basis at school. It is not something to hide. It is not a secret. The girls brag about it and do it with as many guys as they can.

My girlfriend had a child in the middle grades at this same time. She said the same thing was happening there and that the kids just consider it "part of making out". I am stunned - not in my wildest dreams! My reaction? My littlest will never see the inside of a public school!

[Alicia64]

So, I realize I'm going to the choir, but I need to hear what you think.

 

Among several other things, I pulled my five year olds twins out of a "great" school because one of my boys came home after spending time with his 3rd grade buddy (school coordinated) saying, "Dick! Dick! Dick!"

 

This probably sounds like small potatoes to parents with older kids, but it was so sad to hear this coming out of my little guy's mouth. He doesn't know what it means, but my thinking was along the lines of this is just the beginning.

 

I get desensitized to dick, dick, dick and this kind of stuff increases every school year until we're talking truly gross stuff.

 

Any thoughts? My dh has agreed with me, but my parents are saying that I've overreacted. (There were many, many other reasons I pulled them)

 

Thanks,

 

Alicia

[AnnetteB]

Roll back time....Ds, 7, October 1991, while preparing breakfast before school turned to his sister and told her to kiss his b___. Not only words that we had never heard him utter before, but in a tone I had never heard from that sweet boy :(( I had been told that there was an abused boy in his second grade class that swore and spoke of inappropriate things. Our ds learned the F word during his short stint in ps. Their policy was to ignore it. Not even a "shhh." I couldn't expose our kids to that anymore. He didn't go to school that day and graduated from our homeschool. We had home educated in California and had just moved into our home here in late September. It didn't take long to see that Oregon schools were not any different than anywhere else. Our MTV culture is poison. I don't think that you are overreacting.

[Guest Alte Veste Academy]

This probably sounds like small potatoes to parents with older kids, but it was so sad to hear this coming out of my little guy's mouth. He doesn't know what it means, but my thinking was along the lines of this is just the beginning.

 

I was a Social Worker working with the local public elementary schools before I became a mom. Based on that experience, I knew my kids weren't going to school. Lucky for me, my entire family has always been on board, starting with my in-laws who actually homeschooled my husband's younger sister.

 

What you described with your son is NOT small potatoes. If he was a high schooler, it might be small potatoes. When it's elementary kids, it's exactly what you said, a desensitizing precursor of much worse stuff to come. Much, much worse stuff--worse language, worse normalizing of inappropriate subject matter, worse actions based on that new normal... Worst of all? Mom and dad are now ridiculous dweebs who just. don't. get it. The surest way to lose your kids to America's low standards is to let other kids wield more influence in their lives than you do. (I love the book Hold On to Your Kids for its discussion of this problem.)

 

Any thoughts? My dh has agreed with me, but my parents are saying that I've overreacted.

 

You didn't overreact. Everyone else just underreacts. It's an alarming news story and then it's gone. Hey! Listen to this on the 6 o'clock news! It's shocking!

 

Next story...moving on... We accept the disturbing news story as the new status quo, shrug our societal shoulders and move on.

 

Sad.

[Mrs. Frankweiler]

I had heard of "Rainbow Club" activities years ago (on Oprah, I think.) I was appalled back then, but I'm still appalled whenever I hear something like that happening. I think there's an idea that everything but vaginal s*x ok...and it's all so casual nowadays. It just makes me sad. And scared about what kind of a world my children are growing up in. You don't want to keep them in a bubble, but you don't want to expose them to this depravity either.

 

I'm just glad we have the option to homeschool. I know they're going to learn about this kind of stuff someday (probably sooner than I want them...which would be when they're 42!) but at least by keeping them home we can help them hold on to their innocense a little longer and when they do end up learning of these sorts of things, hopefully they're a little older and mature enough to make wise choices rather than just going along with the crowd.

 

-Mrs. F

[Alicia64]

Annette ~ When I first read your post, I felt so much better. "MTV culture". Ha. I call it the "Hannah Montana culture".

 

Thank you again. Only having five year olds, it's only a guessing game on my part how far all of this bad exposure goes in schools. I know I heard the F word when I was in 5th grade and I'm over 40! I assume it's much worse today.

 

Alte ~ I can't thank you enough for your reply. Funny enough, I just finished the book Hold Onto Your Kids and then lent it to a friend. It's a great book, but at least the parts I read, didn't go far enough. I was hoping the author would advocate home schooling, but if he did, I didn't see it.

 

But he definitely ID'd the overall problem.

 

Again, thank you. With people like my parents in my ear acting like I'm making a big deal out of nothing, it's great to hear from people like you

 

I need a home schooling coach!!

 

I hope others will post on this issue. For those of us with young kids, it's great to hear from people who are in our future -- so to speak.

 

Alicia

[Garga]

Not surprised. I was 12 years old 24 years ago, and I remember girls offering to do that for the boys. I remember one particular discussion about it that took place before science class started and the girl and the boy were setting a time and place. I was horrified. I'd always been a sheltered kid. It was my first year of ps after being in private school. I just burrowed my nose farther in my Jules Verne novel... (Yes, I was a nerdy kid, and now I'm proud of it. I'd rather be nerdy than doing what that girl did.)

 

I guess it's just more and more prevalent now, 24 years later.

 

Oh, and 1 year later when I was a 9th grader, we went on a bus trip for marching band and a boy and girl in the seat behind me had s3x. Again, I was horrified and had no idea how to react.

 

I never told anyone about this. Never even considered it. I'm SO GLAD that I can homeschool!

Edited February 11, 2009 by Garga

[woolybear]

WHAT. IS. WRONG. WITH. THIS. COUNTRY??? Eeeek. In school? In the classroom? I am really out of things, but why would these girls want to do this? This is so sad and scary, really. I should have my mom read this, because she thinks I shelter my kids too much. And after all, maybe the school would be good "Why don't you just go and check it out?" I want to share this with dh, but I'm actually afraid he won't think it's so bad, lol. (Or maybe not lol.)

[dn42592]

Wow! Where in S Fl do you live? We just moved away--I hs'd because we didn't want to dare put my daughter in middle school there. I am so sorry your son and the other kids had to deal with this.

[mchel210]

We are in S. W. Broward....all the way west next to the Everglades.

[Sahamamama]

Roll back time....Ds, 7, October 1991, while preparing breakfast before school turned to his sister and told her to kiss his b___. Not only words that we had never heard him utter before, but in a tone I had never heard from that sweet boy :(( I had been told that there was an abused boy in his second grade class that swore and spoke of inappropriate things. Our ds learned the F word during his short stint in ps. Their policy was to ignore it. Not even a "shhh." I couldn't expose our kids to that anymore. He didn't go to school that day and graduated from our homeschool. We had home educated in California and had just moved into our home here in late September. It didn't take long to see that Oregon schools were not any different than anywhere else. Our MTV culture is poison. I don't think that you are overreacting.

 

Yes, this is the policy in most schools, because they don't want to bother correcting profanity, and after all, it's only a matter of opinion as to what actually IS obscene, so... the attitude of most teachers and administrators is to ignore it.

 

Back in my single days, when I worked in a suburban public HS as a teacher aide, I was repeatedly assaulted verbally by several large, male students who said to me in menacing tones, "Miss _____, you know you have to stay out of the stairwells during class change, right? Because you know you want me to r*pe you in the stairwell. You know you want it, and I know you want it. I'll make it good for you...." And they would lick their lips and grab their "parts," just to let me know something was actually in the pants.

 

Of course I reported this, and of course, nothing was ever done about it.

 

So I quit.

 

And resolved to homeschool.

 

End of story.

[clarkacademy]

I don't find this surprising at all. In our society, who is to say what is right or wrong anymore? Since kids are exposed to sexually charged television, images, music, and advertising, it's no wonder that their inhibitions are low.

 

I find it disturbing that these girls seem so anxious to please boys at all costs. Girls are being socialized to this. This is another topic, but is feminism dead? These days, girls seem to have no concept of their worth apart from their looks and their sexuality.

 

It is very sad to picture that young girl surrounded by a circle of boys, and to imagine what that young girl must ALREADY believe about herself. Heartbreaking.

 

I totally agree with all you said here. Poor girl indeed but, what about the boys?? Why is it OK so to speak for boys to behave this way but not girls? I would beat my boys and I never understood why today so many parents have the boys will be boys atitude??

[fast1]

The effect of entertainment and no parental guidance. :iagree: