A change in the homeschool movement since I started 13 years ago

[8filltheheart]

But maybe these people have different reasons for educating their children at home, reasons that don't necessarily require minimal involvement with the public schools. I think the home educating community now is much more diverse than it once was, and includes a lot of people who are not ideologically opposed to the systems of public education. I've known families who brought their kids home because of bullying, because of mis-managed medical needs (type 1 diabetes), because of mid-year moves, etc.

 

Personally I am glad to see a variety of educational options, including independent homeschooling, private co-ops, cyber schooling, flexible charter school programs, etc. I don't think old-fashioned homeschoolers have disappeared, they're still around. But the homeschooling community overall has grown much larger and more divers, so they may no longer be a majority in some places. I don't quite understand why someone who themselves values the freedom to birth or educate their children according to their personal priorities would be disappointed when other women also embrace that freedom but with different priorities.

Maize, I agree with you. The only problem I have is when parents are told they can't possibly do it as well at home. That is counter to the entire homeschooling movement. If individual parents decide to outsource BC that is their personal decision(which I do myself!) that is not the same as presenting the image that outsourcing is the only viable way to quality ed. (which does exist amg the professional co-op business.)

[maize]

Maize, I agree with you. The only problem I have is when parents are told they can't possibly do it as well at home. That is counter to the entire homeschooling movement. If individual parents decide to outsource BC that is their personal decision(which I do myself!) that is not the same as presenting the image that outsourcing is the only viable way to quality ed. (which does exist amg the professional co-op business.)

 

I agree this sounds like a problem, not one I have noticed but that might just be because I'm not on the lookout for it and I've always felt confident that I could teach my kids at home. We're not in an area with big co-ops though.

[Ellie]

But maybe these people have different reasons for educating their children at home, reasons that don't necessarily require minimal involvement with the public schools. I think the home educating community now is much more diverse than it once was, and includes a lot of people who are not ideologically opposed to the systems of public education. I've known families who brought their kids home because of bullying, because of mis-managed medical needs (type 1 diabetes), because of mid-year moves, etc. 

 

Personally I am glad to see a variety of educational options, including independent homeschooling, private co-ops, cyber schooling, flexible charter school programs, etc. I don't think old-fashioned homeschoolers have disappeared, they're still around. But the homeschooling community overall has grown much larger and more divers, so they may no longer be a majority in some places. I don't quite understand why someone who themselves values the freedom to birth or educate their children according to their personal priorities would be disappointed when other women also embrace that freedom but with different priorities.

 

I remain unmoved by your arguments. :D And I'm a little annoyed at your use of "old-fashioned homeschoolers." What?

 

Part of the issue is that people do not understand that they are doing public school at home. They see the money (as in California, where some charter schools give the parents stipends to buy whatever they need, including dance lessons or other extracurriculars) or the "free" curriculum (in the case of, for example, those who use K12, or with the charters that provide enrollment with other distance-learning schools that are not computer based). And the mass numbers of people who are doing public-school-at-home in California make it difficult for homeschoolers, because public school officials put pressure on homeschoolers to enroll in the charters. At the conventions, some exhibitors are becoming reluctant to attend, because the charter school people walk through, get information on products they like, and give their lists to the charters, which then buy directly from the publisher, not the exhibitor, so the exhibitors are out the money they spent for their spaces...and that affects homeschoolers.

 

You can homeschool, or you can enroll your children in a public-school-at-home. They are not the same.

 

And yes, I know this is a hot topic. Happy Monday! :laugh:

[maize]

I remain unmoved by your arguments. :D And I'm a little annoyed at your use of "old-fashioned homeschoolers." What?

 

Part of the issue is that people do not understand that they are doing public school at home. They see the money (as in California, where some charter schools give the parents stipends to buy whatever they need, including dance lessons or other extracurriculars) or the "free" curriculum (in the case of, for example, those who use K12, or with the charters that provide enrollment with other distance-learning schools that are not computer based). And the mass numbers of people who are doing public-school-at-home in California make it difficult for homeschoolers, because public school officials put pressure on homeschoolers to enroll in the charters. At the conventions, some exhibitors are becoming reluctant to attend, because the charter school people walk through, get information on products they like, and give their lists to the charters, which then buy directly from the publisher, not the exhibitor, so the exhibitors are out the money they spent for their spaces...and that affects homeschoolers.

 

You can homeschool, or you can enroll your children in a public-school-at-home. They are not the same.

 

And yes, I know this is a hot topic. Happy Monday! :laugh:

 

I can't find any reliable statistics for the number of private homeschoolers in California today compared to fifteen years ago, but I am not convinced the numbers have shrunk given the overall growth in homeschooling during that time. Do you have evidence to the contrary? Unless the numbers of independent homeschoolers have actually diminished, I am not sure that changes in, for example, vendor sales at conventions are directly related to the number of families using charter schools; other factors are likely in play, including the ease of internet ordering. 

 

I agree that independent homeschooling and enrollment in publicly funded charter schools are not the same thing. I share some of your concerns about potential loss of homeschool freedom if charter schools come to be perceived as equivalent to independent homeschooling, and would fight fiercely to prevent such loss of freedom. At this point in time though I haven't seen a trend towards less freedom from homeschoolers. Are homeschoolers in California under more pressure now from the official educational establishment to join charter schools than they were in the past to enroll their kids in regular public schools? I started homeschooling in California about six years ago, and experienced no such pressure. I did enroll in a charter school to provide more opportunities for my kids. When I got tired of jumping through hoops I pulled out of the charter and filed a private school affidavit. I never felt any official pressure either way.

 

My personal perception is that home education is coming to be seen as less of a fringe choice, that more people are viewing it as an option on equal standing with public and private schools. When I mention homeschooling to parents with children in public school very often their first response is "you know, I've thought about doing that" followed by a description of issues they are facing in the school system. I know many families who have gone back and forth between schooling their children at home and sending them to school. I live in a state which allows part-time enrollment in the public schools, and I also know many families who take advantage of that. There is no clear-cut line between "homeschool" and "school". I guess that can be a source of concern to some, but I am not sure it has to be.

 

If there needs to be a stronger voice encouraging parents in their ability to educate their children independent of government or private schools and co-ops, those who have experience can and should speak up and share their wisdom. I love learning from more experienced homeschoolers. 

 

I just don't see the charter schools, co-ops, private classes, etc. as problematic in and of themselves. 

[ebrindam]

Interesting.  I've often heard a different version of the very same song: "We fought so hard for equal pay, equal access to higher eduction, and equal access to the professions.  Now here you are, with all of these opportunities, and you're just staying home with your kids.  We don't understand it at all, and it is so frustrating and disappointing."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is why I'm uncomfortable with that viewpoint as well. 

[SeaConquest]

I see that we have moved beyond the mommy math wars to the mommy real homeschooler wars. Sigh.

 

There are a myriad of reasons that people homeschool, and a myriad of forms that a homeschool may take (and that form may change as the years go by and different forms serve different purposes). We happen to love our CA public school charter (for now); it fills a critical need for my extremely extroverted (but accelerated) kid. And I remain unconvinced that because my my son enjoys taking optional charter school classes in Lego, gardening, art, music, Spanish, and robotics -- free classes which I believe many would leap at the chance to take if the possibility existed in their state -- that I am somehow less of a homeschooler than those who choose to file the CA private school affidavit. I am primarily responsible for my son's education -- not the school. I pick his curricula, I choose the pace at which he is taught, and I am the one who spends hours each week researching and teaching my son. We made this decision after diligent research and reflection, and without one iota of pressure from outside influences.

 

I'm thankful for the veteran homeschoolers, who helped secure our freedom to choose a learning method that works for us, and who so graciously share their wisdom and experience on this board, but I don't believe that we are selling them out because we elected a hybrid method of homeschooling that is working beautifully for our family.     

[laughing lioness]

Since this is my 24th year of homeschooling, and we were very much part of the group that fought for the right to homeschool, I think I qualify as an early homeschooler as much as anyone.

 

Because I have kids who have graduated using a less rigorous methodology, I think I'm pretty qualified to speak to outcomes. Yes, there is a difference= in character, ability, desire and motivation. Clearly, we are going with the pedagogy that we see/believe and experience to be the most effective. Having 5 kids over 16 years, and having homeschooled for over 2 decades has given us a unique longitudinal view. No one has to agree with us. I'm talking about our experience, having homeschooled long term in 5 different states for the long haul. 

 

 

To be crystal clear: we in no way "public school" at home. We offer our kids a highly individualized academic program utilizing a number of different resources. One of my pet peeves about the homeschooling community has been the lack of education passed off as a pedagogy (i.e. unschooling), "play is a child's work" "they are learning all the time" etc.. Truly reading and understanding the likes of Holt and Colfax, et al revels a very intentional pedagogy of education, not an apologetic for mom just not getting to math or whatever (which is, let's admit, what 80% of unschoolers are really all about these days- I can cough up example after example of this, far more than examples of people truly unschooling via Holt). Just witnessed a discussion on a local board of homeschoolers who are totally not schooling at home all talking about how they really hadn't gotten to school today (or this month, this fall) and yea, they felt guilty, and their kids were bickering and bored and anxious but hey, that's the "beauty of unschooling"...

 

 

[momacacia]

I would be frustrated, as well, not that people weren't homeschooling the same way I had, but that they had chosen to do public-school-at-home instead of privately homeschooling. We early homeschoolers fought hard for the freedom to teach our children at home with as little intervention from public schools as possible, so to see people jumping onto the public-school-at-home bandwagon is disappointing. It's not unlike the way we fought for the freedom to have our babies on our own terms, as natural and unmedicated as possible, and we're now disappointed (and totally puzzled) at the number of women who actually choose to have c-sections just so their babies can be born on specific days. :-)

 

I find the analogy interesting. As a mom who birthed all three of her children at home, two in water, I guess I just don't get disappointed that other women choose to birth differently---as long as we are all free to choose what we determine to be the best births for ourselves and our babies. Would I love for moms to be able to choose hospital births with attending midwives--yes! Would I love for more moms to be able to choose a safe, home, waterbirth--yes! Do I think there is a better choice, considering the science we have available, than to have an elective C-section--sure! But, those are those parents' choices--the first in a long line of decisions they will either have to make for their kids or help counsel their children about.

 

As a homebirther, I could view the hospital natural birth similar to how some might view a K12 education. Could that family have made an *even better* birth (just like mine! ;))? Maybe. But that's a big maybe and they've probably made a really good choice for their family, given the alternatives they feel they have. Could they have researched more? Should they have hired a doula? Should they have taken the "best" birthing classes, instead of just the ones offered by the hospital---ad infinitum. I'm just not going to get into that battle and look down my nose at people because they made a different choice for their kids than the one I did for mine.

 

I just can't see damaging relationships over choice of school, as my MIL has, for example. There is one DIL who is alienated from her because of this (their children <gasp> go to private Christian) and I can see where one DIL could in the future have to choose something like K12 to school her children at home. They cannot come near affording private and would not do public at school, and depending on the mother's ability to "keep up" K12 might be a solid choice for them. Is it "subpar" educationally to having two former attorneys educate you where the father can stay at home until 10am and do math and history, and a private tutor can come and teach writing and critical thinking, and art classes and music classes can be paid for? Yes, I guess one could say that it's subpar, but until I get into that mom's house with her kids it's tough to really judge how subpar that is for that particular family.

[8filltheheart]

 

Because I have kids who have graduated using a less rigorous methodology, I think I'm pretty qualified to speak to outcomes. Yes, there is a difference= in character, ability, desire and motivation. Clearly, we are going with the pedagogy that we see/believe and experience to be the most effective. Having 5 kids over 16 years, and having homeschooled for over 2 decades has given us a unique longitudinal view. No one has to agree with us. I'm talking about our experience, having homeschooled long term in 5 different states for the long haul. 

 

 

But simply b/c outsourcing was a more rigorous outcome for your family does not mean that outsourcing equals more rigorous outcomes for all homeschooling families.  I personally have seen more outsourcing opportunities which offer inferior educational outcomes compared to what we do at home than more rigorous outcomes.  I do outsource, but mostly to local universities.

[PeacefulChaos]

Give me a minute to put my head between my knees now that I realize I've been homeschooling for 13 years!!!!!

 

Anyways! I've noticed that when I started this journey there were lots of hs groups that met weekly at a park and the kids just played. Just played. the teenagers all the way down to the newborns. Well, obviously newborns didn't play, but they got admired and held, etc. The moms sat and talked. Jus talked. Talked about what was going right, going wrong, what was for dinner, what they missed about working, their pets, whatever.

 Then we met once a month and had some kind of educational activity. A field trip. A science day. International Night. Etc.

 

Now, there are way more groups and they still meet weekly but instead of just...gasp!...hanging out, it's all day educational classes (aka co-op) and homework assignments. And MAYBE once a month fun things like skating. Maybe.

 

I'm really not fond of this shift. What was wrong with just going to a park and letting kids PLAY?

 

How do teenagers play at the park? ;)

 

Just kidding.  Seriously, though, where we live, playgrounds and parks are made for little kids.  Like, Pink's age.  There is one out of the way park that includes older kids (toddlers, on the other hand, would not do well at this playground).  

I've noticed that, in my local 'circle' of homeschoolers that I know, I'm pretty middle of the road.  There are those that approach schooling much more rigorously than I do, and those are the ones I'm closest with and would most enjoy these times with.  Needless to say, that isn't happening with them. :)  

But honestly, I don't know that I *want* another thing to do.  I think we do enough.  This is the first year we've done anything outside of home that is during the day/'for homeschoolers', and I wouldn't want to add anything else to our plate.  (While both of ours are classes, they are of a relatively laid back/extracurricular nature: art every other week, movie making class twice a month.  I organize field trips once a month for local homeschoolers.)  That's enough for me.  :)   My social time is found elsewhere.

[Justmeandyou]

Since this is my 24th year of homeschooling, and we were very much part of the group that fought for the right to homeschool, I think I qualify as an early homeschooler as much as anyone.

 

Because I have kids who have graduated using a less rigorous methodology, I think I'm pretty qualified to speak to outcomes. Yes, there is a difference= in character, ability, desire and motivation. Clearly, we are going with the pedagogy that we see/believe and experience to be the most effective. Having 5 kids over 16 years, and having homeschooled for over 2 decades has given us a unique longitudinal view. No one has to agree with us. I'm talking about our experience, having homeschooled long term in 5 different states for the long haul. 

 

 

To be crystal clear: we in no way "public school" at home. We offer our kids a highly individualized academic program utilizing a number of different resources. One of my pet peeves about the homeschooling community has been the lack of education passed off as a pedagogy (i.e. unschooling), "play is a child's work" "they are learning all the time" etc.. Truly reading and understanding the likes of Holt and Colfax, et al revels a very intentional pedagogy of education, not an apologetic for mom just not getting to math or whatever (which is, let's admit, what 80% of unschoolers are really all about these days- I can cough up example after example of this, far more than examples of people truly unschooling via Holt). Just witnessed a discussion on a local board of homeschoolers who are totally not schooling at home all talking about how they really hadn't gotten to school today (or this month, this fall) and yea, they felt guilty, and their kids were bickering and bored and anxious but hey, that's the "beauty of unschooling"...

 

Clapping!!!

[laughing lioness]

But simply b/c outsourcing was a more rigorous outcome for your family does not mean that outsourcing equals more rigorous outcomes for all homeschooling families.  I personally have seen more outsourcing opportunities which offer inferior educational outcomes compared to what we do at home than more rigorous outcomes.  I do outsource, but mostly to local universities.

 

I totally agree. I don't outsource much for "enrichment" at all. 

[PeacefulChaos]

So I just saw this thread today, so I'm replying to some old posts.  Forgive me.   :p

And on a side note, I never expected it to be so heated!  Sheesh!   :D

 

 

I have also noticed a complete obsession with organised classes and field trips :) Back when we started, everything was DIY. Now, outsourcing is very popular. I'm not so pleased about that.

But... why?  What is wrong with organized field trips?  Some places require a minimum number of students in order to qualify for field trip rates or field trips in general (including homeschoolers, minimums are required).  There's really no way around that, unless we were to just decide to not go as a field trip at all.  This will often result in more money and will take away the 'field trip' portion, whether that be a specific tour or program or whatever.  

It's probably worth mentioning that I'm an extrovert.  I think it's fun to go to the art museum and the apple orchard with a group of friends.  I could choose to be exclusive and *only* invite the people I'm really good friends with, but it's a good deal so I choose to open it up to the local homeschool community.  We took 50 people to the apple orchard and it was super fun.  We took 15 to the art museum and it was fun, too.  

It's also probably worth mentioning that there are already a lot of things that I've done with the kids previously that some people would call 'field trips'.... I don't call taking my own kids to the zoo or the science museum a field trip.  I just call it 'us going to the zoo.'  There have been a couple things we did specifically because it lined up with our studies, and those, sure, they were field trips (I can remember 2-3 over the last 4 years).  So I guess I'm just saying I distinguish between a 'field trip' and just the family taking a day to do something fun.  I think there's plenty of room for both.   :)

I don't think anyone said there was anything wrong with co-ops. :-) What I said was that co-ops in many communities have replaced support groups, which I don't think is a good idea. There needs to be support groups.

I will admit I don't get this.  Why?  What are they for?  I don't think I'd even like them.  I don't want to sit around with a bunch of women and talk about curriculum and the supposed hardships of being a homeschooler.   :blink:

I have friends.  If I ever had a reason to talk to anyone about homeschool stuff, I would be able to talk to them - some are homeschooling moms themselves.  But honestly, I don't know why I'd want to do that.   :confused:

Idk, the whole concept seems really foreign to me.  I don't see the point.

 

Oh, the other thing I've noticed is that home school groups, activities and events used to be 'public'...if you were a newbie, you could find out about everything that was happening for homeschoolers.

 

Now, a lot of these things are private - only advertised to friends or people known to the organiser. It's fine when you're established, but really tough on new moms.

Hmm... I'm not sure which category our stuff would fall under.  I don't know how to make homeschool things 'public' in the truly, really PUBLIC sense - advertise on the radio?  Put up a flyer at the library (where I don't even go, so it wouldn't really be public, either)?  We open our stuff on facebook, and the setting is public until the deadline, when I close it for privacy reasons (when I post where we're meeting, etc).  There is a FB group where I post everything that encompasses much of the surrounding counties.  There are, of course, those who are not a part of the group, but I don't know how that information would get to them.  I don't think that's anyone trying to be exclusive, but if they haven't stepped out to try to become a part of the larger homeschooling community, then there's really nothing that can be done about that.  They've made their intentions pretty clear.  All they need to do is meet one other homeschooler who is plugged into that community to join - it isn't exclusive.  

 

 

 

Once a month, the co-op meets at a local food bank and preps the food for the people who need it.  (Like prebagging groceries, etc.)

 

THIS is an EXCELLENT idea!!!!  I need to remember it!

 

If I may butt in...
Those of you who are not part of a co-op, where do your children meet their friends? 
This has been my sole reason for seeking out a co-op when my daughter is old enough. We live in a small town and the nearest HS groups are an hour away (that I know of anyway). We are 45 minutes from our church, so it's not as if we can just jaunt over to our Sunday School friends' homes. 

I am sure there are other homeschoolers in our tiny town, but the only ones I know of are from a super crazy, uber-strict religious sect that I would not want (or be allowed) to be a part of. 
I guess, for right now, I see a co-op as a means to finding some friends and have some play time with someone other than mom and any siblings that come along in the next few years. 

Well, we've been in the same church since we moved here 12.5 years ago (and it's the church DH had been in his entire life until college).  So our kids were born into it, and their friends came automatically.   :p

The boys made good friends with the boys next door, who were their age.  Unfortunately, the neighbor boys moved.  

Pink just had a best friend move, too.  They were born 2 months apart.  Now she's in PA.

To top it all off, we are leaving our church.   :(  But the friends are already there, and the families aren't going to exclude us just because of that.  So their friends will still be their friends.  Now we'll all just go through the transition of trying to make new ones as we try to find a new church home.

 

I thought this until I went to museums and theatrical productions where school field trips were attending too.  The school kids were loud and crazy, every time.

^^^ :iagree: Kids are just loud.  They're crazy, loud, and run around.  (Not all - personality obviously plays a big role here!)

On the upside, at least homeschool field trips generally have a much higher ratio of chaperones to students.   :D

 

 

 

 

Look, I get it.  I purposely didn't have anything to do with a lot of co-ops or classes.  I never felt guilty.  I wouldn't feel guilty if we didn't do them now.  I insisted on ONLY doing an art class that *I* had a hand in coordinating, so a lot of my own values passed on to it - it isn't a co-op, there's no Statement of Faith, there's no exclusivity, there's just a class, there's an art teacher, here's the time and place, here's the cost, sign up if you want.  The kids who aren't in class will just play outside or whatever.  It's all pretty laid back and I *like* it that way.  I have no interest in super structured stuff right now, and I don't think I will unless we happen to stumble across something that 1. goes along with what we are already planning on studying and 2. seems worth the effort, time, money, etc.  

[8filltheheart]

I totally agree. I don't outsource much for "enrichment" at all.

I'm not sure we are saying the same thing. I am not talking about enrichment. I am talking about core academics through to graduation.

[maize]

I just saw the post about co-ops having replaced support groups. Personally I suspect that it is the internet, not co-ops, that is pushing support groups aside. I have one gigantic support group right here!

 

We do have local support groups as well, but I rarely attend. Like many others, I rely on local homeschool Facebook and yahoo groups to establish connections and learn about local opportunities. I am part of a small group (four families) that gets together twice a month for educational activities and playtime. Right now that is meeting my family's need for involvement with other homeschoolers.

[lea_lpz]

Thinking of actually moving to a more rural area. Hope it leads to more old school, relaxed homeschoolers.

[LucyStoner]

There are definitely a zillion options here outside of structured co-ops. Actually, the most structured co-ops seem to be religious groups. Most homeschoolers here are secular and the largest homeschooling group functions as a set of weekly park days with some neighborhood/affinity based park days and a few clubs and many field trip offerings.

 

This is what we have on tap for the next month or so through various homeschool lists/pages:

 

Swimming (this is e/o week, meet at a pool during open swim)

Park

Soccer lessons (weekly meet at park, mom led and free)

Museum of Flight

Park

Puppet show

Visit an urban farm

 

None of these events cost more than $14 for all three of us total and many are free. Most are coordinated on Facebook.

 

If you are looking for something more laid back, why not start a generic FB group for homeschoolers in your area, set up a couple of laid back events and see what happens.

[LucyStoner]

Ack, I responded to a zombie thread. Oh well.

[SunshineMom]

I have noticed a change in our homeschool population demographics...very few teens.  

[SnMomof7]

The local HS group here may be smaller - around 30 children at a meeting (maybe 6-7 moms). It started as a coop kind of thing before we moved here, but quickly turned I to let the kids run and play while the moms sit and talk. We love it! We hit the park when it's nice out and terrorize a large, local church when it isn't :). Heading into our 7th year homeschooling this fall. The oldest hs'd child who still attends (sometimes) graduated, went to college, and is working in her field. She sits with us now ;).

 

We have large families, tiny families, Christian ones, secular ones, ones who've sent then oldest children back to public school but who stills come to visit or to bring babies/toddlers. A bit of everything. It's lovely :).

[Guest]

The (d)evolution of a homeschooling chestnut:

 

"All you need is a library card and love."
~1992

"All you need is a library card, love, and an internet connection."
~2002
 

I just realized that I don't even know the modern version.

 

How did we get so old?

[mom2scouts]

.

[AndyJoy]

My area has every type of group geared toward homeschoolers you can imagine. There are academic, all-day co-ops. There are church-based twice-a-month co-ops. Some are secular, some have strict dress and conduct codes. There are private schools with part-time enrollment options. There are support groups with park days and MNOs. There are monthly groups for: field trips, Nerf gun play, skating, and hiking. There is a a weekly park day group. The local libraries offer LEGO and science explorations. Various nature & environmental groups offer lessons/outings. The rec center has weekly PE and swimming classes (plus open swim) for homeschoolers. Our state even allows dual enrollment in PS for just the courses or sports you desire.

 

I think this is awesome, because everyone can find a group that meets their family's needs. And yet even with all these options, I'm currently forming a new co-op with two other moms :) We met at an open-to-anyone nature walk and just clicked. Our kids are a good fit, we're a good fit, and we felt that the other support groups/co-ops/activity groups we'd tried were not. So we decided to form our own.

 

Our co-op is specifically for enrichment/exploration and encouraging friendships, not intended to replace any subject. It will give us a chance to pool our skills/knowledge and offer our kids a chance to explore new topics and maybe discover things that excite them that they'll want to pursue further. It will also give the moms a chance to connect and support each other in our homeschooling endeavors. We plan to have periodic MNOs to plan topics and just chat with each other away from kids. It is going to be an "exclusive" invite-only group because we don't want our group's focus to be shifted away or accidentally open it up to someone who is not a good fit for us and our kids.

 

For me, a traditional support group does not seem useful because I don't feel this kinship to the greater "homeschooling community." It feels just as silly to feel like I HAVE to hang out with a bunch of random homeschoolers for support or fun as it does to HAVE to send my kid to a class of random age-segregated peers. IME there are too many different personalities/styles/approaches in such a large group. It seems like the moms spend so much time tip-toeing around saying anything about homeschooling specifics for fear of offending others who do things differently. Or there are the ones who are so sure their method is the best that they argue and judge and dominate. In a large group, I'd want to focus my energy on catching up with those with whom I felt most bonded/compatible and this might seem cliquish or exclusive to others who didn't share our methods/values/interests. I (and these two new friends) have personalities that crave time with a few close kindred spirits much more than big-group "support". We've found our "tribe" so we're going to spend our very limited outside-the-house time on what we think we need most at this point, with people who we know are compatible. And I'm SO glad to have found them. I've always been an extroverted, storytelling, life-of-the party type but it's a temporary sugar-high kind of rush. I NEED one or two close friends much more and struggle with depression when I don't have this. I look fine on the surface, but I feel restless and dissatisfied.

 

I am sure others have different personalities and needs so I am glad there are myriad options and I can say "to each their own" without feeling guilty about creating/protecting what WE need.

[Bluegoat]

I think there are probably a lot of things going on wiith this, some negative and some positive. 

 

The increasing organizing and controling of childrens lives is probably a bad thing - kids should have enough time to get out and play once a week.  I think a lot of homeschoolers now feel they need to spend a lot of money on the right fancy curriculum and classes, which isn't generally true and is probably negative.

 

On the other hand, options for education make sense to me.  It's great to have options for class work for subjects that a parent can't teach - I would love to have something available and affordable for French or French conversation practice, and we pay for music lessons.  And with some activities it is really ideal to have a group, especially as kids get older.  Resource sharing can also be very practical, for things like bulk purchases or sharing expensive equipment.

 

We actually do not have a lot in the way of formal homeschool co-ops here, but a lot of activities are around a specific purpose -  like art classes run by the gallery  during school hours rather than the typical evening or Saturday classes.  People organize meet-ups more informally and casually, often over the Facebook group if they want to extend a general invitation.