Great DD moment today...anyone want to share something?

[OneStepAtATime]

DD13 has been taking art lessons from a local artist.   There is a picture hanging at the art gallery where the lessons take place that DD fell in love with the first time she saw it. She has been quietly saving money for it and hoping it wouldn't get sold before she had enough.  She loves this picture so much that she has me drive her there early so she can study it.  

 

Today, the owner of the gallery put a label on the picture as we were leaving.  DD asked what it said.  The woman told her the picture had been sold.  DD told her she thought that was great since it definitely deserved a home.  When we got to the car I expected her to be upset since she was now away from others and could be honest about her feelings.  She smiled, admitted she was really disappointed but told me she knew it was a long shot to be able to save enough money to buy the picture before someone else and she was just grateful that she had gotten to view it for so long.  I was so proud of her maturity in the situation.  

 

 

[Jean in Newcastle]

What a mature attitude.  

[PeterPan]

My ds5.5 walked through a store with me today without destroying anything, crying, melting down, or otherwise forcing us to leave early.

 

(yes, that should be read with gravity and amazement!)

[Jennifer-72]

Well today was a bit tiring, but we did have a big highlight from Sunday and yesterday. Ds on his own told me we should go buy a birthday gift for his friend and he even had an idea of what to buy. He based this idea on something he knew his friend liked. Then on Monday he reminded me that we should phone said friend to sing happy birthday. I know it seems very small but it makes me happy to see him thinking of others and doing such a good job of being thoughtful.

[OneStepAtATime]

My ds5.5 walked through a store with me today without destroying anything, crying, melting down, or otherwise forcing us to leave early.

 

(yes, that should be read with gravity and amazement!)

 

Absolutely being read with gravity and amazement...and a big cheering section! :)

Well today was a bit tiring, but we did have a big highlight from Sunday and yesterday. Ds on his own told me we should go buy a birthday gift for his friend and he even had an idea of what to buy. He based this idea on something he knew his friend liked. Then on Monday he reminded me that we should phone said friend to sing happy birthday. I know it seems very small but it makes me happy to see him thinking of others and doing such a good job of being thoughtful.

 

Yeah!  Good going for DS!  This IS important.

 

I remember being utterly stunned when my 4 years younger brother reminded my parents that my bday was coming up and he wanted to pick out his own gift to give me, not just stick his name on a card.  He was 6.  I honestly didn't think he thought much about me at all.   :)  He seemed a lot cooler after that.

[Jean in Newcastle]

DS16 has been talking about getting a summer job.  He is notorious for talking about things and not following through.  Yesterday he found a listing for a job that he is qualified for but it requires a first aid/ CPR certificate.  He found and signed up for a course that he will take all day tomorrow.  

[OneStepAtATime]

DS16 has been talking about getting a summer job.  He is notorious for talking about things and not following through.  Yesterday he found a listing for a job that he is qualified for but it requires a first aid/ CPR certificate.  He found and signed up for a course that he will take all day tomorrow.  

Awesome! :hurray: 

 

 Honestly, I have some difficulty with follow through, too.  I guess it is an EF thing.  It wasn't much of an issue prior to breast cancer but now I have to really, really watch myself.   :glare:

 

Which reminds me, Mom and I took a course a while back but we never got the certificate.  Better call in the morning.  Thanks for the memory jog, Jean.   :lol:

[iammommy]

Ds, 15, is a junior firefighter with our volunteer company in town. They guys do a LOT of kidding the juniors, and ds has taken it all in stride. Today he got compliments from the chief and several other firefighters for the good job he did in training tonight! So proud.

[OneStepAtATime]

Ds, 15, is a junior firefighter with our volunteer company in town. They guys do a LOT of kidding the juniors, and ds has taken it all in stride. Today he got compliments from the chief and several other firefighters for the good job he did in training tonight! So proud.

Whoohoo!  Terrific that he got the compliment and terrific that he handles the kidding so well.  Yeah!

[Violet Crown]

We're again out of the country; and again Wee Girl was asked by security to confirm her name as the name on her passport. This was such a disaster last year that I bought her an ID band with her full name and "non-verbal" on it. But she managed to whisper her name audibly, and we were through! Of course, UK security is magnitudes gentler with children than the TSA. But still - I was amazed and thrilled.

[Jennifer-72]

We're again out of the country; and again Wee Girl was asked by security to confirm her name as the name on her passport. This was such a disaster last year that I bought her an ID band with her full name and "non-verbal" on it. But she managed to whisper her name audibly, and we were through! Of course, UK security is magnitudes gentler with children than the TSA. But still - I was amazed and thrilled.

That is truly fantastic! Good thinking about the non verbal id band.

[OneStepAtATime]

We're again out of the country; and again Wee Girl was asked by security to confirm her name as the name on her passport. This was such a disaster last year that I bought her an ID band with her full name and "non-verbal" on it. But she managed to whisper her name audibly, and we were through! Of course, UK security is magnitudes gentler with children than the TSA. But still - I was amazed and thrilled.

Yeah!! And I agree with Jennifer, the ID band was a great idea.

[Princess Ariel]

Ds 15 actually cooperated and took his newly prescribed med for ADHD. 

[OneStepAtATime]

Ds 15 actually cooperated and took his newly prescribed med for ADHD. He has been very anti-med (anti anything actually!) in the past. He is at the age where we have tried many things to try to deal with it, including other meds which did not do much, and we have to do something.  So for him, that was a major accomplishment.  This morning he actually got up and asked for it. Not sure how fast this one is supposed to work, but wondering if he noticed something different yesterday....will have to have a talk later on and find out.

Keeping fingers crossed that this will help.  And yeah to DS asking instead of resisting!  Good luck, Mom.

[Heathermomster]

We have family visiting. Last night I asked DS to empty the dishwasher. As I thanked him, he told me that it was no problem and that he should have done it sooner. He was happy to do it. :)

[OneStepAtATime]

We have family visiting. Last night I asked DS to empty the dishwasher. As I thanked him, he told me that it was no problem and that he should have done it sooner. He was happy to do it. :)

Whooohoo!  Big hi five!  

[PeterPan]

We have family visiting. Last night I asked DS to empty the dishwasher. As I thanked him, he told me that it was no problem and that he should have done it sooner. He was happy to do it. :)

Whoa.   :svengo:   

 

 Send some of that here!  LOL  I'll have to tell dd it can happen.   :thumbup:

[Timberly]

.

[OneStepAtATime]

Yesterday DS9 made us fried eggs, toast and microwaved sausage. I was in the kitchen, but not doing the work. Today he made scrambled eggs, toast and microwaved bacon.

 

He's not wanted to work near a hot stove or outdoor grill before and I never put in the effort to get him comfortable. For some reason, yesterday was the day he decided he wanted to try cooking.

 

I need to go check the date on our smoke detector batteries and fire extinguishers.

:hurray:  :lol:

[Mukmuk]

We just came back from a nearly 2-week long holiday. Ds was cooperative and not nagging to cut the holiday short (well, just a wee bit). He was also okay with the long visits to ruins and the various museums. When he got tired, he asked to wait by himself. This is really quite something; we had already seen some of this positive development from last summer, but this holiday is different in that it's about sightseeing and history (not his thing at all), with something new to do everyday - ds craves a rigid schedule. When he got bored, he entertained himself by reading or by testing various hypothesis about the ruins or the various rock formations (he's very much into science factoids). At the airport lounge, he noticed that the guy next to him had a stack of papers that were filled with mathematical symbols. He was curious enough to ask what they were about (mathematical modelling of bone growth) and tried hard to understand. The professor was impressed and complimented ds on his interest and calm questions.

 

I think ds coped by taking long baths and other habits that he does at home. On the flight back, he was already arranging to slide back into his regular activities that same afternoon. It worked wonders!

 

Dh and I are hoping this spurt of self management sticks.

[OneStepAtATime]

We just came back from a nearly 2-week long holiday. Ds was cooperative and not nagging to cut the holiday short (well, just a wee bit). He was also okay with the long visits to ruins and the various museums. When he got tired, he asked to wait by himself. This is really quite something; we had already seen some of this positive development from last summer, but this holiday is different in that it's about sightseeing and history (not his thing at all), with something new to do everyday. When he got bored, he entertained himself by reading or by testing various hypothesis about the ruins or the various rock formations (he's very much into science factoids). At the airport lounge, he noticed that the guy next to him had a stack of papers that were filled with mathematical symbols. He was curious enough to ask what they were about (mathematical modelling of bone growth) and tried hard to understand. The professor was impressed and complimented ds on his interest and calm questions.

 

Dh and I are hoping this spurt of self management sticks.

Awesome!  

[Princess Ariel]

Just want to say THANK YOU to  OneStep for starting this thread!  I tend to get so caught up in the negative with my kids and this has been great to read about others  and share these successes!  I really needed this! Very uplifting!

[OneStepAtATime]

Just want to say THANK YOU to  OneStep for starting this thread!  I tend to get so caught up in the negative with my kids and this has been great to read about others  and share these successes!  I really needed this! Very uplifting!

I'm glad it helped.  I have to keep focused on all the positives and it really is easy to forget that.  

 

We honestly had a pretty tough day today (starting with Mom's cat being attacked by a dog and badly injured...we had to put her down :( ).  Then I found out my favorite cat in the whole world is ill and we have to make some decisions on how to deal with that.  Other stuff, too.  Lots of emotional ups and downs.  Re-reading this thread helped me refocus, the kids and I played some games and now we are getting Jason's Deli take out and hanging out with Mom to give us all some emotional support and a little fun.  I know that these things, too, shall pass.

 

Big hugs to everyone.  I hope everybody can find something to be happy about today.  Best wishes.

[Tiramisu]

Just want to say THANK YOU to  OneStep for starting this thread!  I tend to get so caught up in the negative with my kids and this has been great to read about others  and share these successes!  I really needed this! Very uplifting!

 

I agree. Reading about all of these wonderful success made my eyes tear up with happiness, instead of the sadness as I had been feeling a moment before. They got me to focus on the good in our house, too.

 

Here are some things I've been feeling good about and need to focus on:

 

Dd13 cleaned the house last week for a big party we had over the weekend. She went through everything and decluttered and organized better than I could have ever done. She's taking ownership of it now and we've had a tidy little home all week. It's been so nice.

 

Dd13 struggled with math and getting her facts down for many years. Things became rough with lots of mistakes in the early part of this year, too, but things improved this spring, thanks to VT. She has to take a placement exam for the high school she'll attend next year so we worked through two sections of practice tests today, and she got all the math questions correct!

 

Dd18 is taking a local college class this summer to get a statistics requirement out of the way. Our reasoning was that taking it here would allow her to avoid having to take her school's math placement test and a likely prerequisite, and she would only have to pass to get the transfer credit and wouldn't have to worry about it affecting her GPA. Obviously, she does not consider herself a math person. The concern was, however, that the classes are each four hour long lectures and she has CAPD! Well, guess what? She got an A on the first test, and an A+ on the second. It's crazy. The really cool thing is the confidence it's giving her. She actually asked me if I thought she could handle the science she would need for medical school and about the requirements for applying to a PA program. She was also invited back to the children's hospital's volunteer program and got a great placement.

[Storygirl]

I'm so glad I clicked on this thread today, because it was one of those days. I need to be reminded that good things can happen!

 

So, we haven't had anything big to report on lately, but there have been several times over the past week or so when I gave DS10 an answer that I knew he wouldn't like.  We have a major problem with him pestering for a different answer. I tend to steel myself in anticipation of his poor response. So how refreshingly unusual it has been on several occasions recently to hear him just say, "Okay, Mommy," instead.

[Mukmuk]

 

So, we haven't had anything big to report on lately, but there have been several times over the past week or so when I gave DS10 an answer that I knew he wouldn't like. We have a major problem with him pestering for a different answer. I tend to steel myself in anticipation of his poor response. So how refreshingly unusual it has been on several occasions recently to hear him just say, "Okay, Mommy," instead.

This would be huge in my house! I've just had this done to me, the negative, that is. Keeping the positive memories is helping me to bite my tongue.

[kentuckymom]

Yesterday, during his sister's speech therapy session, my dyslexic son with ADD tendencies (no diagnosis for the latter), willingly did a page in his summer review packet from school and then read a chapter in a book that's rated at a third grade level. He still had enough time during the half hour session to rebuild the Lego vehicle he brought with him.

[OneStepAtATime]

Well, we had a surprise last night.  When I called DH to discuss our situation with our ill cat (may have to be euthanized) he was out of town.  As soon as we got off the phone, he told his boss he would attend the last meeting by phone and he booked a flight back.  He arrived at 11pm last night.  When he walked in the door, DD's latest art piece was in the living room.  Her art teacher had framed it beautifully and had gifted it to her the day her favorite gallery picture got sold.  DH thought it was a professional piece I had purchased for the house.  He was really surprised to find out DD had done it.  When I told DD this morning, she was thrilled.  And it meant a lot that DH would cut his trip short to support me.

 

Edited to add I am really grateful it was DDs piece.  I think DH was getting a bit stressed that I was running out to buy art pieces when we are facing a fairly large vet bill.  :)

[Princess Ariel]

What a great husband you have! 

[OneStepAtATime]

What a great husband you have! 

I was honestly pretty stunned.   :)   I think I'll keep him.   :lol:

[Heathermomster]

All by his lonesome, DS is currently pulling up my carpet, padding, and tack strips in my formal dining room.  We are getting new flooring late next week. :D

 

I kind of see this as an exercise in "What do I want to be when I grow up?"

 

If DS doesn't complain, I'll have to do something nice for him, but he can't know ahead of time.

[OneStepAtATime]

All by his lonesome, DS is currently pulling up my carpet, padding, and tack strips in my formal dining room.  We are getting new flooring late next week. :D

 

I kind of see this as an exercise in "What do I want to be when I grow up?"

 

If DS doesn't complain, I'll have to do something nice for him, but he can't know ahead of time.

Goodness, does he want to hire out?   :hurray:   :)

[Storygirl]

Ooh, we need new carpet.  We could use him over here!!!

[Jean in Newcastle]

Dd12 mastered 4th grade math on Khan Academy today!  Woo hoo!  (This sort of makes up for how tough things are with ds today.)

[Heathermomster]

Maybe I can hire him out.  DS keeps telling me he wants things, and I suggested he find an alternate source of revenue outside of his immediate family.  :ohmy:

[Snow]

Great stories!

 

Ds has completed an entire week of math with zero tears and almost entirely by himself! In fact this morning he did math at breakfast so he could get it done before my mom came in to town.

 

Then we were talking about how he wants to take guitar lessons and I asked about what he thought about it from a frustration standpoint and he said well I think I can do it because it's just like math... It feels good to get better at it.

:thumbup1:

[OneStepAtATime]

Dd12 mastered 4th grade math on Khan Academy today!  Woo hoo!  (This sort of makes up for how tough things are with ds today.)

 

 

Great stories!

 

Ds has completed an entire week of math with zero tears and almost entirely by himself! In fact this morning he did math at breakfast so he could get it done before my mom came in to town.

 

Then we were talking about how he wants to take guitar lessons and I asked about what he thought about it from a frustration standpoint and he said well I think I can do it because it's just like math... It feels good to get better at it.

:thumbup1:

 

O.k. for all those parents with kids who are doing math with zero tears, think they can come tutor me?  I am getting a bit frustrated with remembering all the procedures in fractions from moment to moment!  I am having ps fractions flashbacks.  :)  Thank goodness I can just keep flipping back and forth in my Key to... workbooks but it does get a bit time consuming.

[OneStepAtATime]

Maybe I can hire him out.  DS keeps telling me he wants things, and I suggested he find an alternate source of revenue outside of his immediate family.  :ohmy:

 

Awe yes, outside revenue.  Love Christmas and birthdays when someone other than me gives the kids money.  :)

[Ivey]

I'll admit that I when I saw this thread earlier in the week, I couldn't think of anything to share. We've had a rough couple weeks to say the least.

 

But! Every day is a new day and today, a boy on Ds9's baseball team invited him over after the game! When the game ended, I stuck around and chatted with a few moms while the boys packed up their equipment and threw water at each other. I wasn't really paying attention when one of the boys came over and asked his mom if his best friend could go back to their house, but when he added "Can I ask if Rory wants to come too?" I nearly fell off the bleacher! This is the first time that he's ever been invited over by another kid without the parents arranging things. Rory handled it like an old pro, accepting the invitation, then walking over to Dh and announcing that he didn't need a ride home. :lol:

 

Also, he got walked twice today, which is his goal every time he steps up to the plate. Actually hitting the ball hurts his ears.  :001_rolleyes:

[OneStepAtATime]

I'll admit that I when I saw this thread earlier in the week, I couldn't think of anything to share. We've had a rough couple weeks to say the least.

 

But! Every day is a new day and today, a boy on Ds9's baseball team invited him over after the game! When the game ended, I stuck around and chatted with a few moms while the boys packed up their equipment and threw water at each other. I wasn't really paying attention when one of the boys came over and asked his mom if his best friend could go back to their house, but when he added "Can I ask if Rory wants to come too?" I nearly fell off the bleacher! This is the first time that he's ever been invited over by another kid without the parents arranging things. Rory handled it like an old pro, accepting the invitation, then walking over to Dh and announcing that he didn't need a ride home. :lol:

 

Also, he got walked twice today, which is his goal every time he steps up to the plate. Actually hitting the ball hurts his ears.  :001_rolleyes:

 

I am so sorry that the weeks have been rough.  BTDT and it isn't easy.  Huge hugs!

 

But so, so awesome that he got invited and handled it like a pro!  Whoohoo!!!!

[OneStepAtATime]

I have another one.  We will probably have to put our cat down on Monday and DS, DH and I are really sad.  DD seemed to not be terribly affected by it, but she is more practical.  Cat sick?  Can't be cured?  Then euthanize it.  That attitude was really hurting DS, though.  He felt like she didn't care at all.  It bothered him.  This morning DD took our cat out in the front yard with our dog so that he could enjoy the sunrise and the dog could cuddle with him (all the cats love our dog to pieces).  She stayed out there quite a bit and shot video of them.  She plans to do it again tomorrow before we take him back to the vet.  It helped DS to see that she really does care.  She just doesn't get as weepy as the rest of us.

[Dmmetler]

DD9, who has sensory and anxiety issues (and a lot of ASD traits), and is terrified of being off the ground, stunted at shoulder height with teenage bases last Monday. She is turning 10 in November, and if she needed to stay on u10 (where she's big enough that she can be a base or spotter instead of flying, while on u13 or u18 (this summer it's u18 and there's not a separate u13 skills class,  in the fall, it should be separated so she'd be on u13 for competition) , we'd have to get a waiver, so we tried her with the older girls this summer, where there's no competition. Both the coach and I really expected that, maybe, by the end of the season, she'd be able to manage it without a panic attack.

 

She managed it the first practice with the new team.

 

Really, she's been doing very well socially with kids lately in general.

 

 

[OneStepAtATime]

DD9, who has sensory and anxiety issues (and a lot of ASD traits), and is terrified of being off the ground, stunted at shoulder height with teenage bases last Monday. She is turning 10 in November, and if she needed to stay on u10 (where she's big enough that she can be a base or spotter instead of flying, while on u13 or u18 (this summer it's u18 and there's not a separate u13 skills class,  in the fall, it should be separated so she'd be on u13 for competition) , we'd have to get a waiver, so we tried her with the older girls this summer, where there's no competition. Both the coach and I really expected that, maybe, by the end of the season, she'd be able to manage it without a panic attack.

 

She managed it the first practice with the new team.

 

Really, she's been doing very well socially with kids lately in general.

 

I am so, so excited for her and for you demmetler!  That is so awesome!   :hurray:

 

How often do they practice?

[Dmmetler]

She practices weekly for 90 minutes with the team, plus two separate tumbling classes a week. It's not the sport I would have necessarily picked for her, but she's worked so hard at it, and I think in many ways it's been good for her to have something where audience response is a big deal, where they actively practice making eye contact with the judges. It's a sensory challenge, but she truly wants to do it.

 

It helps that her coach has a daughter with aspergers.

[OneStepAtATime]

She practices weekly for 90 minutes with the team, plus two separate tumbling classes a week. It's not the sport I would have necessarily picked for her, but she's worked so hard at it, and I think in many ways it's been good for her to have something where audience response is a big deal, where they actively practice making eye contact with the judges. It's a sensory challenge, but she truly wants to do it.

 

It helps that her coach has a daughter with aspergers.

I am so, so glad that things are going well!  And thanks for the clarification.  I was curious.  :)

[Storygirl]

DS10 has made a friend at vacation Bible school this week. His first real friend, I think. :hurray:  He refers to some of the other boys on his gymnastics team as his friends, but he really has no relationship with them outside of class.

 

His VBS teacher happens to also be his Sunday school teacher. She has taught his class for about four years in a row, so she knows him fairly well. Today she mentioned that DS10 and the other boy have really bonded.  I said that I was glad, because making friends is not easy for him, and she responded that she knew that and so wanted to be sure to mention it to me.

[OneStepAtATime]

DS10 has made a friend at vacation Bible school this week. His first real friend, I think. :hurray:  He refers to some of the other boys on his gymnastics team as his friends, but he really has no relationship with them outside of class.

 

His VBS teacher happens to also be his Sunday school teacher. She has taught his class for about four years in a row, so she knows him fairly well. Today she mentioned that DS10 and the other boy have really bonded.  I said that I was glad, because making friends is not easy for him, and she responded that she knew that and so wanted to be sure to mention it to me.

Is there any way to extend this past VBS?  Do what you can to get to know the parent and invite them over or to meet at the park or something?  Have a playdate really, really soon?

[Princess Ariel]

Just wanted to update about my ds 15 and the new meds he started several days ago for his ADHD.  After small improvements last week, when I spoke to the doctor's nurse with an update, the doctor  decided to increase it to what is still considered a lower dose.  Well, after this week, ds is saying he feels like he can actually "think", that his head was usually a jumbled mess. He is actually "working" this week at a summer job.  He gets up, eats, takes his meds, and off he goes.  I am getting good reports (family members supervise him) and  so far that he is doing a great job. He is excited about earning money, spending a lot less time on video games and being bored at home.  So we will see if it continues.  The doctor told him it was a month long "experiment" for ds  to try and see if it made a difference because he was so anti meds. I really want to sneak in some math or something to see if it has affected his academic skills! Wish me luck with that! He was able to read for a  longer period of time  with a novel he had previously started.

[Storygirl]

Is there any way to extend this past VBS?  Do what you can to get to know the parent and invite them over or to meet at the park or something?  Have a playdate really, really soon?

 

I had the same idea. I have to see if I can get his contact info when I pick DS up the next time. There are a lot of people who come to our VBS from other churches, so I'm not sure if his family attends regularly or not. If I don't get his family's info this week, I might lose my chance :thumbdown: . I'll tell DS to ask for his phone number, but that plan may or may not succeed.

 

So the really interesting thing is that DS was sitting side by side with another boy today, looking at a book together and discussing it, when I picked him up at the end of VBS. As we left, I asked DS if that was his new friend, and he said, no, it was another new friend!  :ohmy:

 

To illustrate how unusual this is, DS is starting his third year on a gymnastics team. He sees the same group of boys three times a week for three hours at a time (so he knows them pretty well), but when I drop him off for class, he begs me to stay with him until class starts and stands by me instead of talking to anyone else. I encourage him to go talk to someone, but he shakes his head. He has anxiety, and he's shy.

[Storygirl]

Just wanted to update about my ds 15 and the new meds he started several days ago for his ADHD.  After small improvements last week, when I spoke to the doctor's nurse with an update, the doctor  decided to increase it to what is still considered a lower dose.  Well, after this week, ds is saying he feels like he can actually "think", that his head was usually a jumbled mess. He is actually "working" this week at a summer job.  He gets up, eats, takes his meds, and off he goes.  I am getting good reports (family members supervise him) and  so far that he is doing a great job. He is excited about earning money, spending a lot less time on video games and being bored at home.  So we will see if it continues.  The doctor told him it was a month long "experiment" for ds  to try and see if it made a difference because he was so anti meds. I really want to sneak in some math or something to see if it has affected his academic skills! Wish me luck with that! He was able to read for a  longer period of time  with a novel he had previously started.

 

:hurray:  :hurray:  :hurray: