I just could "into it" with our librarian! AND LOST IT!!

[Alaska Mom]

:rant:

 

OKAY, HERE I GO:

 

I'm severely sleep deprived due to my last-minute (3 weeks now) stress out over "being ready" to start school and have all my ducks in a row. I stopped and got a caffeinated coffee (I'm decaf-only person - not a good choice for me :eek: ) So now I'm sleep deprived, stressed, and WIRED....... and now I'm just needing to vent.......

 

I've spent HOURS researching recommended books lists, and, logically, after finding ones I deem worthy, checking my local library for them. Well, our newly constructed, beautifully decorated, art-adorned, "green", multi-million $ library (at taxpayer expense) doesn't seem to carry many of the "top 100 classical books of all time", or the "top 1000 classical books of all time", or really many others of the titles I find recommended here there and everywhere.

 

So... without much choice, I've been ordering books like crazy on-line (shouldn't have sold my stock in Amazon a couple of years ago - darn :mad: ).

 

So...here's my raging :angry: moment of sleep deprivation coming to a head:

 

I make a quick stop at the library with my ds3, while my dd6 is at home with babysitter (trying to get some one-on-one with him). After only 90 seconds from entering the closed off beautifully decorated children's room, with not a soul there except a librarian who followed us it (I think she just wanted to "monitor" our movements), and I'm looking up on the computer, only to discover they don't have "The Little Engine that Could" - wow, that was a surprise :cursing:; when I hear over my shoulder the librarian disciplining my son for being on a bean bag chair with his shoes on, complete with a full comprehensive lecture to him (he's 3) on how "the seems will come apart and the white stuff will fall out" (that's the paraphrased version of the lecture he got). He wasn't unruly, he wasn't jumping, he was sitting on it with his shoes on, I'm sorry, there was no sign on the door that said "shoes off!"!

 

I LOST IT!!!!

 

I began by explaining my sleep deprivation situation, and that I'm not a decaf person on a major buzz, and that my credit card is maxed with Amazon.com purchases for books that this library SHOULD HAVE, and that if my 3yo is acting like a 3yo I AM SORRY, but he's NOT HURTING THE BEAN BAG, and I ended with my opinion that our library - which has ONE CHILD IN IT AT THE MOMENT but 25 internet users lined up outside on the computers, was NOT A PLACE OF HIGHER LEARNING , NOR A PLACE WELCOMING TO CHILDREN , but a overprice internet Cafe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!AGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I walked out. My 3yo was so upset we didn't get a book, I had to turn around in the parking lot and go back in......like a shamed puppy......we are in a small town - ouch! I'm so ashamed of myself....

 

Please Lord, forgive me!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

I did go and apologize, and she told me to fill out a suggestion card.....:crying:

[Alaska Mom]

:banghead: I'M NOT HAVING A GOOD DAY!!!!!!!!!!!

[elegantlion]

Okay, while your reaction may have been a little extreme, your summation about the internet cafe may not have been wrong.

 

If it is a new library I would start requesting titles.

 

Yes, if the librarian treated my 3 year old in that manner, I would not thinking kind thoughts either. Didn't the library used to be a fun place for small children?

[Mrs Mungo]

awww.....:grouphug:

[Slartibartfast]

:grouphug:

 

 

 

 

I am not having a good day either.

 

:glare:

 

 

The baby has not had a good day either. I wish when I was having a bad day someone would hold me all day while I sucked on something comforting...only I want tequila in mine. And salt

[Mrs Mungo]

:grouphug:

 

 

 

 

I am not having a good day either.

 

:glare:

 

 

The baby has not had a good day either. I wish when I was having a bad day someone would hold me all day while I sucked on something comforting...only I want tequila in mine. And salt

 

*checks fridge* I have jose quervo pre-mixed margaritas or mike's hard lemonades, take your pick.

[mommaduck]

Hugs to you, hon.

[camibami]

Personally, I say "hear, hear".

 

Sometimes temper tantrum is the only way to say what *needs* to be said, and sister- you said it!!!!!!!!

 

:lol:

 

Now have a Mike's and enjoy all thsoe fun boxes coming your way!

[Slartibartfast]

*checks fridge* I have jose quervo pre-mixed margaritas or mike's hard lemonades, take your pick.

 

 

 

I am afraid I will get bad rep for drinking the Mike's while nursing...only a very different kind. :lol:

[Brigitte]

Don't beat yourself up over it. We all have days like that. And, frankly, your frustrations were justified. I hope the caffeine wears off soon and you are able to get a good night sleep.

[Crissy]

I'm sorry you're having a bad day, Alaska Mom.

All this planning stuff will get better over time.

 

Regarding the librarian. Was she perhaps trying to help a little boy understand that the furniture is new and that we want to treat it gently so we can enjoy it for a long time?

It is my experience that many kids don't treat library stuff respectfully. Maybe she's hoping to prevent that sort of behavior with preventive conversations?

[PiCO]

Didn't the library used to be a fun place for small children?

 

The library was a good place for small children back when most people expected their children to behave in public places. Now librarians assume that parents are not going to expect proper behavior out of children, so they feel like they need to follow kids around.

 

I think it's too bad that the librarian reprimanded the op's child who was actually behaving himself, but I have seen so much bad behavior out of kids at libraries that I kind of understand where these librarians are coming from.

 

 

I agree that the op should request books. My library is very good about researching book suggestions.

[Trivium Academy]

(((Alaska Mom)))

 

Wow, even though it might not have been the best thing to do, I admire your spunk. I kept my cool while a previous librarian handed my then 3 yo boy a lollipop and then asked me if it was okay, only to tell him two seconds later that he couldn't eat it in the library. I am so glad we moved!

 

I turned red, and immediately left the library b/c I was going to lose it myself and as a pastor's wife in a small town- that wouldn't have been good.

 

Tomorrow is a new beginning. :grouphug:

[Saille]

Oh, sweet pea. I wrote a LONG, angry letter to the library over much the same thing...no children's librarians available in the children's section, librarians surfing eBay instead of helping kids, no kiddie lit. knowledge whatsoever, and a completely condescending attitude quite likely to drive folks less comfortable with their literacy away from the library altogether.

 

There's hope. I live in a *much* better library system now, with lovely, lovely librarians who care for children. Frankly, if there's a smaller, shabbier branch somewhere within fifteen miles of you, go there. Odds are, those librarians will know how to fix every problem with a smile and some duct tape.

[TwinMominTX]

I have a similar rant...

 

I was so disgusted today with our library. I want to do a comprehensive study of American artists. I was looking at my library for "obscure" artists such as Andy Warhol, Rube Goldberg, Grandma Moses...you know, the ones no one has ever heard of. My library had NOTHING.

 

What burns me more is that I once justified my giant Amazon bill by telling myself I would simply donate the books to our library when I was done. They wouldn't take them because it was too much work to sort through the books. These are brand new books (that they don't have) that someone is donating to them free of charge. Ugh.

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

Oh, girl, you *apologized*. What more can you do? Don't beat yourself up. You were right, she was a nutjob. (And if you were a teeny tiny bit high strung, I vote that you had a pretty good excuse.)

[Elaine]

:grouphug: Alaska Mom :grouphug:

 

 

That is so frustrating, I feel for you.

[Nestof3]

If she thinks kids are going to take their shoes off before getting on a bean bag chair, she is in for a huge surprise!

 

Thankfully my library is good about ordering 95 % of what I request, because I saw the sort of "visual" improvements they made a couple of years ago, and if they didn't have any money left for books, I'd be talking to someone! Then, there are so many computers facing people chatting away on the internet.

 

Kids in the kids section of the library? Unless you're counting the ones on the computers playing games, or the boy who always seems to be having a tutoring lesson, I can count the number of children I see in our kids section on one hand. Oh, there was the one boy who couldn't read Amelia Bedelia but was asking me where the Judy B. Jones books were because he could read those. That poor boy clung to me like he's never had any affection. He followed me around like a lost puppy. I never did see a parent.

 

Or, there was the one daughter whose mom wouldn't check out any books for her because she was unable to read the words to the book her mom had in her hand. She was the little girl who was crying because her mother kept berating her for not being able to read and how SHE (the mom would not do the reading for her). They left with empty hands.

 

Ugh -- I actually get sad whenever I go to the library.

 

Sorry about your horrible experience.

[klmama]

I did go and apologize, and she told me to fill out a suggestion card.....:crying:

 

Actually, besides being the right thing to do, this was probably the best thing you could have done to further your cause. It showed the librarian that you realized you overreacted, had the guts to own up to it, and generally showed you have decent character, despite your little rant. She will probably take seriously any suggestions you make regarding your library's book selections, rules for children, etc. Take advantage of the opportunity to give written suggestions so they can consider them!

[GSMP]

:grouphug:just lots of:grouphug:

[Alaska Mom]

:001_wub: I'm all better now.....:blushing:. You guys are the sweetest......THE best!! :grouphug:

 

I'm going to write a letter to the library advisory board. For having a big, beautiful, expensive library, we have an unacceptable shortage of quality books. Our closest alternative is 80 miles away and the inter-library loan program is $2/book (when they can get them).....I may as well just order them on amazon.....so frustrating.

 

Okay, I'm over it........the caffeine is still killing me..... ..... :nopity:.........okay, I'm done now ;). Thanks you all.

[Margo out of lurking]

(Side thought: Why do people who dislike children work in a children's section?)

 

I live in Stickville, and my closest library is very small. I came from an amazing library system which continually won national recognition. We have many "good" books (by classical hs standards), but they are old, ancient; my kids would not want to touch them.

 

I began working there part time this summer, ending up, shockingly, in the children's section.

 

We order new books all the time for patrons. I'm talking ALL the time, we get several boxes in every month. (And you should see some of the dumb--sorry--stuff that people order.) Ask how to request books to add to the collection. I am quite certain that the money allocated for books would come from a different fund than money allocated for redecorating.

 

I'd complain to someone higher up about the way your child was chastised. Do they think kids should take their shoes off? (I doubt it.) On the off chance that your child's shoes had sharp heels (such as dress shoes), the appropriate comment might have been, "Hon, please try to keep your shoes on the floor!" And NOT say anything again unless the child is later jumping on the bag. :)

 

We've had patrons "lose it" occasionally. I keep in mind (and remind my co-workers!) that we have no idea what's going on in someone else's life, not to take it personally.

 

 

You poor thing!!!!!!!

[JFSinIL]

I would make a list of all the classic books they do not have yet should have and give it to them. Fill out as many purchase request cards as you can each visit- enlist friends/neighbors to do the same.

[cin]

What burns me more is that I once justified my giant Amazon bill by telling myself I would simply donate the books to our library when I was done. They wouldn't take them because it was too much work to sort through the books. These are brand new books (that they don't have) that someone is donating to them free of charge. Ugh.

 

 

Um, can you donate them towards Cincinnati? Sort through, heck. I'd even pay MEDIA MAIL shipping! :D

 

 

NOTE TO SELF: Give Donna a big hug the next time I go to the Library. I do so love my librarian. There are several, but I call her mine because she will come out of the office if she sees me standing at the desk, to check me out. (Not me personally....nevermind) And she KNOWS how I want my stuff checked out...never bickers about MY books going on my teacher card, goes and gets my holds for me before I say something.....Ah yes. Give her a hug.

[Nestof3]

Our library has a request system on their website, so I can just request away from my desk. :D

 

I just requested -- and they ordered:

 

For SOTW:

Mario's Mayan Journey

Stories from the Silk Road

The Story of Salt

 

Children's Lit:

The Magic Pudding

The Little Bookroom

Jenny and the Cat Club

Ellen's Lion (author of Harold and the Purple Crayon)

The Dr. Seuss Learning Library books

 

Science:

Building Foundations of Scientific Understanding (Bernard Nebel)

[Dayle in Guatemala]

the small library we had in my hometown in MN. They were so great! They LOVED kids and you could tell by their very active kids section. They reached out to the "tweens" in town with book clubs, a whole section of their own in the library with movies, magazines, cool books, etc. They loved homeschoolers and asked me regularly what could they order to help us out with our studies each year. Whenever we went in, they were helpful and happy to see our whole family.

 

I didn't realize how rare an experience that is. I took it for granted. Now I want to e-mail them and let them know how much I appreciated their work.

[Heather in the Kootenays]

Of all the things that you could care enough about to lose it over, I think it's great that you chose the library. Your librarian probably isn't used to that level of passion over her work.

[Paula in MS]

I understand the frustration over a library that is not learning-oriented. Our library now carries video games. Yes, you heard me right. How is this a good thing? It makes me wonder what a library's purpose is. I always thought it was learning, but apparently it is media distribution.

 

The funny thing is that there are a lot of books that I would like our library to purchase but I never ask because I assume that they just won't do it. (The One Small Square books are an example.) I was at the counter a couple of weeks ago checking out some books. Several librarians were behind the counter including the children's librarian. My dd6 spoke up and said, "Hey, do you think you can get those Land of the Lost movies in?" The children's librarian said that that sounded like a good idea and wrote them down. She said she would check to see if they could get the entire set. So, apparently, they are looking for suggestions. I never knew.

 

Paula

[readwithem]

(Side thought: Why do people who dislike children work in a children's section?)

 

 

 

I couldn't agree more.:iagree:

[4kids4me]

....you'll look back at this and laugh. You really will. You may even use this exact situation to encourage someone else.

 

:grouphug:

[TexasRachel]

Wow, do you live near me? Okay, probably not, but I completely agree. There's a $5 MILLION dollar brand-spanking new library near me with *no* books. Rows and rows of bookshelves with only 15 or so books on *one* shelf per bookshelf. But lots of computers. Give me a break. There was an article in the paper where they only had $40,000 to spend on books for the library so they were requesting people to *donate* money for books. Like I haven't donated enough with my taxes. I guarantee you the electronics in the library cost more than $40,000.

 

Oh, yeah, there's also a "cafe" at our library. Or will be. It's empty now.

 

And no, nothing wrong with telling the librarian your son was behaving.

[FlockOfSillies]

when I hear over my shoulder the librarian disciplining my son for being on a bean bag chair with his shoes on, complete with a full comprehensive lecture to him (he's 3) on how "the seems will come apart and the white stuff will fall out"

 

Imagine if she had chastised him for being a homeschooler with new shoes that other kids couldn't afford. :lol:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(If you don't get the joke, years ago one of the moms here was in the doctor's office waiting room and was told by another patient that it was unfair for her to homeschool because other kids' parents couldn't afford new shoes like she could for her kids. IIRC, the shoes weren't even new or expensive. It was such an absurd line of thought that it became a running joke around here.)