reading at 3.5

[kiwik]

If I could search I could probably find an old thread.

 

My ds3.5 doesn't know all the letter sounds but he knows quite a few and most letters. I was planning on just keeping on with those like I did with ds5.5 who I sent to school at 5

just starting to read.

 

But the last couple of days he seems to be trying to sound out words on signs and labels etc. I know a lot of you had children reading early.

 

Bother really all I want is reassurance that it is ok to encourage him when my family, parenting experts etc will all be accusing me of trying to steal his childhood somehow.

 

Eta. I know he is a very long way off reading but he is ahead of where dd5.5 was and I got disapproval with him too.

[SKL]

You don't have to tell anyone. :) If someone notices your child reading a sign or whatever, and it's a judgmental person, just say "yeah, he's been doing that lately" or "darn Sesame Street" and change the subject. What are you supposed to do, cover his eyes? Good luck.

 

My kid was intently reading people's emails over their shoulder at age 4. Ugh. Trust me, I had no desire to rush her into that. Imagine warning your business colleagues to shield their Blackberries from a nosy preschooler. However, it sure is nice now that I never have to work with her on reading, since her sister has so many needs.

[kathkath]

You don't have to tell anyone. :) If someone notices your child reading a sign or whatever, and it's a judgmental person, just say "yeah, he's been doing that lately" or "darn Sesame Street" and change the subject. What are you supposed to do, cover his eyes? Good luck.

 

My kid was intently reading people's emails over their shoulder at age 4. Ugh. Trust me, I had no desire to rush her into that. Imagine warning your business colleagues to shield their Blackberries from a nosy preschooler. However, it sure is nice now that I never have to work with her on reading, since her sister has so many needs.

 

 

My boys both are/were early readers. We provide time and opportunities but no formal "lessons.". I actually think it is great bc they can sit quietly and be engaged in something good. It also checks one more thing off the mama worry list ;)

[LMD]

I LOVE that stage, where they start seeing and understanding letters all around them, like a whole new way of seeing the world! I really have trouble seeing any problem with encouraging their natural curiosity...

 

ETA - I don't know how I'd stop my 2 y/o from pointing out 'O's when we're out and about, it's the only letter he can reliably pick (thanks to those leapfrog letter fridge singing things, not to any effort on my part...)

[theYoungerMrsWarde]

I blogged about our experience with ds3.5 learning to read really early.

 

Here is the thread that I started on this board that was very helpful.

 

jenbrdsly's blog Teaching My Baby to Read has a lot of wonderful ideas and resources. It's her Leapfrog recommendations that lead to Early Bird's early reading. The LeapFrog Word Builder toy recommended on my blog post is the BEST toy for learning ever. I can not recommended it enough.

 

A bunch of parents on here who blog did a blog tour this summer, writing about different challenges they have encountered teaching gifted or 2E kids, and the things that have helped them.

 

As for people noticing your little kid reading, well, it's going to happen. I think what is most important is to not damper your child's enthusiasm. If they're trying to sound out a word in public, help them. You can't spare the whole world from possibly feeling bad. What you can do is use the real world as a learning experience the same way you would with an older child. I read on a blog a few weeks back that said that they homeschool because learning shouldn't have to wait. I completely agree with that.

[StartingOver]

My youngest three all started reading before 4, on their own. When they show that much interest I get out some phonics ( OPGTR) and work on the white board. I want them to have phonics instruction, even though they are putting words together on their own, very simple, very short lessons. I leave books at their level down, all of mine have wanted to get them and read to me. Before age 5, everything done in my house is interest based. Although most of mine wanted to do "school" like their siblings. I don't see a reason not to teach them if they want you to.

 

As long as little ones are enjoying it, and there isn't frustration, I say go for it.

[boscopup]

What parenting experts tell you you're stealing your child's childhood by letting them develop reading skills in a perfectly normal way? :blink: They don't sound like "parenting experts" to me.

 

You'll be fine. I agree - don't talk about it to disapproving family. And if they do find out, just say, "Oh, he just taught himself! Isn't it cute?" Because basically, he did. My oldest learned to read at 4.5 by playing starfall.com (and he'd known his letters/sounds since 2.5... it took him 2 years to be able to blend, and then he took off). I didn't teach him. My youngest can read a few Bob books and such and sound out words. He's 3.5 and has been doing this for a while. He is not anywhere near reading independently, and in public he mostly just reads "stop" (then sounds it out and says it again). Technically he's reading early (earlier than my other two, for sure), but again, I haven't been teaching him. He just learns on his own, picking things up from his big brothers. When I have DS2 sounding out a word from WRTR that I've written on the board, DS3 often beats him to it. :rolleyes: The only way I could prevent him from reading is if I duct taped his eyes shut for the next 2 years.

 

No way would I allow someone to berate me for allowing my child to develop good reading habits at a young age!

[genny]

I totally think it's nuts that people think teaching your child to read is stealing his/her childhood. I have a little one who just turned 4 and is reading at least a first grade level or higher. He's loving every minute of being able to pick up a book and read it himself. Now he can enjoy a book whenver he wants not just when there is someone available to read to him. What part of childhood is being stolen???

 

I wouldn't worry what others think. If your little one is ready and willing go for it.

[YourFidgetyFriend]

My daughter began reading at 2.5 and almost no one noticed or cared. Even if they had noticed and disapproved, she enjoyed it and that was much more important.

[TeachingMyTwo]

DD began sight reading around 13 months and decoding phonetically outloud at 19 months. DS was decoding around 16 or 17 months I think? I purposefully began "teaching" DD once I learned it was possible to start that young, although at that age it's more about exposure that direct instruction. Infant and toddler literacy is just misunderstood so people can get very judgemental about it, but it's truly the best decision I ever made for my kids. For anyone that doesn't approve of that? Well, they can raise their kids however they like! :glare:

 

Go for it!

[zaichiki]

 

Bother really all I want is reassurance that it is ok to encourage him when my family, parenting experts etc will all be accusing me of trying to steal his childhood somehow.

 

 

 

Oh nuts, encourage the kid already! Ignore the naysayers. You know what's best for your kiddo. It won't kill him if he's reading early.

 

Okay, I get it that people may give you strange looks. Some will protest that *their* kid didn't read early and he/she is fine. This is the reaction of those who feel like they must measure themselves against others. They are defending their approach so as not to feel inferior b/c your approach is different.

 

Still, we have to do what's best for our children no matter how other adults/kids feel about it. I get it. I do. I recently got some really bonkers looks from some homeschooling moms who saw my 6 y.o. reading The Hobbit at the park. Whatever. LOL! (It was a nice change of pace when one mom told me she had early readers, too, and then asked DS about his favorite part. We've since gone on to have several friendly conversations.)

[laf919]

My husband taught himself to read at age 3. My MIL says that one day he just picked up a new book - one she knew he had never heard/seen before - and started reading it. I have been kind of glad she told me this, as my younger dd did the same thing as a young 4. Yes, we had talked about letter sounds and such - but some kids just figure it out on their own. My older dd read the first 3 Harry Potter books to herself in kindergarten. It's just who he is - and I would encourage him, let him pick books he's interested in, etc. If he is interested in doing some simple phonics work on a whiteboard, then go for it - a few minutes a day won't kill him and will help improve his skills - but my dd was totally not interested, so I dropped it. She still reads - and one of the reasons (among many, many reasons) that she is currently in public school kindergarten is that she has a wonderful teacher who is going through basic phonics with the class. DD will gladly and happily participate at school - but won't do anything for me. I do think going through basic phonics at some point is important for almost all early readers. There are some exceptions, but my dds' have seen their spelling skills go way up with some phonics work. It's like they figured out how to decode on their own - but needed some guidance on the encoding part. YMMV - and in any case, I wouldn't worry too much about it for a few years. Just have fun!

[kiwik]

Thanks. He's only just starting I think (he is one of those kids who suddenly does stuff and you are totally taken aback). I think I will just keep quiet around my family until he lets them know.

[DoppeltGemoppelt]

I hear your concern! So many people think it's fine to let their kids vegetate in front of a screen all day, but working with them for five minutes on phonics will definitely ruin their childhood (note the sarcasm in my voice)!

If I had not tought my kids phonics before kindergarten, they would now learn in public school that the words horse, hose, nose, house and dice all end in -s- ...

 

Go ahead and praise you child's efforts, it will certainly not harm him!

[TracyP]

I have never had anyone take offense, make rude comments, be anything but kind and supportive when either they(the adult) noticed on their own or were told by my kids what they were doing.

 

My .02.... Many (maybe most?) other parents do not like being told by you how advanced your kids are. Even when they are telling you how advanced their kids are. Even when your story fits the conversation perfectly. It doesn't seem to matter. I just keep my mouth shut except for a few close family members and friends.

 

So don't hold your child back and let him be himself. What you share with others...only you can decide. :)

[Kathy G]

Don't worry about what others say. I hear you about the weirdness though. When DD was almost 4 she was at a friend's house and apparently started reading books to her friend (not surprising since her preschool teacher encouraged that) Her friend's mom caught on and made my daughter read several books to the Mom. My daughter didn't really understand and came home upset so I called the Mom to see what had happened. She told me she was quizzing her to see if she just knew the books by memorization. Seriously?! Why would it even matter.? The Mom proceeded to attack me about pushing my kids. HA I never even taught her to read, just pointed out letters. I am sure it was jealousy.

 

I didn't push or stop mine from reading. We all read a lot here and the only problem is we have to keep buying bookshelves! :laugh: Let them read whatever they want. Why is it we face weirdness for our kids reading/doing math early but nobody questions sending a 5 year old to a 6AM sporting practice? I haven't met a lot of academically advanced kids who are pushed, but I have met a lot of burned out child athletes from pushiness. OK, off the soapbox for now...

[TeachingMyTwo]

I used to work in youth sports administration, a job that I "fell into" by chance in my life before kids. There is a HUGE double standard in this country when it comes to valuing sports vs. education. I don't personally get it, but hey, to each their own.

 

A friend of mine just laughed after she quite easily taught her young toddler letters using the Preschool Prep series and then shared it with a family member so she could teach her child too. The mom insisted her child was not "ready," but this is the same kid that had already memorized every single pokemon character and facts about each. :D Hilarious!

[Crimson Wife]

Well, *IF* you've got your child spending 15 hours/week at drill-and-kill Jr. Kumon in an attempt to get "ahead" at 3 1/2 so that the child will get into the "right" kindergarten and down the line to an Ivy League college, then yes, I'd say you are stealing his childhood. Those "hothousing" parents do, in fact, exist. There are plenty of them in my neck of the woods and frankly, I feel very sad for their children being subject to so much pressure at such a young age. It isn't healthy, and TBH the kids who are actually future Ivy League material don't need to be "hothoused".

[babysparkler]

I totally think it's nuts that people think teaching your child to read is stealing his/her childhood. I have a little one who just turned 4 and is reading at least a first grade level or higher. He's loving every minute of being able to pick up a book and read it himself. Now he can enjoy a book whenver he wants not just when there is someone available to read to him. What part of childhood is being stolen???

 

I wouldn't worry what others think. If your little one is ready and willing go for it.

 

I agree. I think early reading enhances their childhood by opening them up to worlds of knowledge they can easily access on their own :)

[kubiac]

If you need some moral support from "experts" about early childhood reading, here are some resources:

 

* http://larrysanger.org/2010/12/baby-reading/

* Native Reading: How To Teach Your Child To Read, Easily And Naturally, Before The Age Of Three by Timothy Kailing

* Raising Confident Readers: How to Teach Your Child to Read and Write--from Baby to Age 7 by Richard Gentry

 

All three are non-crackpots, in my humble opinion. :)

[kiwik]

I tried to quote but it didn't work

 

I don't think sending him to a 6 am sports practice would go over well with my family to be fair.

 

slightly off topic but have you noticed how so many people are convinced that boys have to be less able academically than girls at 5. I know all the research etc but from what I can see most boys are just fine.

[serendipitous journey]

well, <hugs> and agree with everybody above that it's okay for him to learn to read, and with CrimsonWife that if one does find oneself drill-and-killing a 3.5yo perhaps one should take a step back :) .

 

My tot is interested in letters & words, and I'm so grateful! Button is really incredibly bright, but hated almost all books as a tot and preschooler. When we started Kindergarten I would bribe him with a piece of white chocolate for the first time through a new book (repeat reads were okay). He hated phonics and I finally forced him to do some each day (as in, phonics or time-outs) halfway through kindergarten because he was frustrated at not being able to read.

 

so from that perspective: hallelujah for the language-loving little one!

[alwayslearning]

It's sad that you can't just be proud, and have family be proud as well. I fail to see why early reading is a bad thing! I got the lectures and criticism too, though. My oldest was very advanced and I was in awe all the time. I just encouraged and supported. It seems silly to stop that process; think what that teaches them.

 

Jen

[poiema]

slightly off topic but have you noticed how so many people are convinced that boys have to be less able academically than girls at 5. I know all the research etc but from what I can see most boys are just fine.

I think the only reason boys are suppose to be less able academically at 5 is because they are less "mature" at that age. Meaning it's harder for them to sit still and learn in a classroom. I agree, my boys are just fine! I actually think reading early has helped their learning overall because, like someone else said, they can read about whatever they want and not have to wait for someone to read to them. As long as they want to learn, the idea that learning to read before school is "stealing their childhood" is ridiculous! Reading is such a huge part of my boys' childhood because they love it! Getting them to stop reading and go to bed is the hard part...

[StartingOver]

I don't get why folks think kids should "sit still" to learn. Mine usually bounce all over. My son will hang from the couch upside down while doing math, when he comes across a math fact he hasn't memorized he will jump, skip, roll, flip to the number to get it. LOL Whatever gets it done. He loves learning.