s/o one alcoholic drink with dinner thread

[Laurie4b]

http://peele.net/lib/sociocul.html#viii

 

This is an interesting link with research about the social aspects of drinking and comparing social practices that are associated with low levels of alcohol abuse and those associated with high levels of alcohol abuse. I went looking for this type of info because I live in an area that was "dry" (no alcohol could be sold) up to a couple decades ago. Rates of alcohol abuse were quite high. This is consistent with research. Groups in which children see adults drinking moderately, socially, and particularly in religious rituals (like a Passover meal) have the lowest rates of abuse.

 

Here are two sites listing health benefits of moderate alcohol consumption:

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/alcohol/SC00024

http://lpi.oregonstate.edu/infocenter/foods/alcohol/

 

Heavy drinking has health risks that most of us know about. But for the portion of the population who is not pregnant or breastfeeding, no history of breast cancer, no strong family history of addiction, moderate drinking has health benefits.

 

What do you base your practices on in terms of what type of alcohol consumption you do and don't expose your children to? I realize for some groups, alcohol consumption is forbidden by religion--I don't want to start religious debates on what scripture of whatever religion does and doesn't say, so perhaps if you want to share that that is your reason, could you just say, "Our religion forbids it." I would be interested in hearing how people form their beliefs about what their children should and shouldn't be exposed to.

 

For us, we wanted our children to see us drink on the occasions when we do have a glass of wine, etc. We figured the more they see reasonable drinking role-modeled, the better. We drink occasionally--not even moderately. Dh's family is total teetotalers at the generation of his parents based on the interpretations of that generation that alcohol consumption was forbidden by their religion; however, I don't know anyone of dh's generation who is a teetotaler--different interpretations of scripture; same religion. My extended family included only occasional drinkers except my great grandfather was an alcoholic and the negative impact on his family was discussed.

 

Our kids are all teens and have no problem distinguishing drunkenness from moderate consumption. Our older two have seen others experimenting with alcohol, drugs, etc. We've seen no evidence that they experiment at all.

[Impish]

Wolf will have beer on the wknds.

 

Generally, I don't drink around the kids...not about setting an example or anything, but b/c I want to relax and enjoy it, which makes waiting for bedtime a good idea :lol:

[IsabelC]

The kids see us and other people drinking occasionally, and that doesn't bother me. They have also observed me decline alcohol because I was breastfeeding, or not feeling well, or thirsty and wanted water instead, or had drunk enough, or didn't feel like drinking.

 

I wouldn't want to expose my children to drunk people, and have managed to avoid that to date.

 

So far we've taught them three basic things about alcohol:

1. Alcohol isn't a proper drink as in something to hydrate you.

2. Alcohol is optional, not something you automatically start using when you grow up: some people like to have a little but plenty of people choose not to.

3. Large quantities of alcohol damage people's health and cause them to do silly things.

 

I think the kids have taken this to heart, because sometimes when they hear about someone committing a crime or doing something extra stupid, they will comment "Oh, he must have drunk too much alcohol." I guess they'll eventually learn that there are other reasons for people making bad choices!

 

 

ETA - Strewth, I have 2000 posts - this means I must never post again!

Edited October 24, 2011 by Hotdrink

[ThatCyndiGirl]

For us, we wanted our children to see us drink on the occasions when we do have a glass of wine, etc. We figured the more they see reasonable drinking role-modeled, the better. We drink occasionally--not even moderately.

 

 

This is us exactly. We drink VERY occasionally, but we drink whenever we want to. (make sense? We just rarely want to.) I recently threw away a bunch of wine coolers b/c I wanted the fridge room more than I wanted them.

[regentrude]

What do you base your practices on in terms of what type of alcohol consumption you do and don't expose your children to?

 

Cultural and family history.

I am from Europe, where alcohol is not such a taboo. there is no drinking age. Kids grow into the tradition of drinking wine with meals by being exposed to responsible drinking in their parent's house. I started having small glasses of wine, diluted with water, maybe in preteen age. A 14 year old has a champagne toast for her confirmation, as a completely normal part of celebrating. My parents always drank wine or the rare occasional beer. I have never seen a family member drunk or even tipsy. My family has modeled responsible drinking. It was the same in my DH's family.

The only time I had more alcohol than I should have was when drinking one glass of a sweet homemade wine as a teen at a friend's house - it was an unpleasant and embarrassing experience that I cared never to repeat again.

DH and I model responsible drinking for our children. We drink in moderation, because we enjoy the taste of good wine, not because we want to feel drunk. All our friends drink responsibly; I can not recall any party or event as an adult where somebody from our circle of friends had too much to drink.

We believe that it demystifies alcohol and that kids who grow up with alcoholic beverages as part of the culture feel less inclined to binge drink just because it is forbidden. My kids may ask to taste (they don't like it). (And no outcry please: it is legal in MO for parents to serve their own children alcohol in their home) They know it is not something special.

We educate our kids about the dangers of driving and drinking; about safe behavior at parties; about the bad things that can happen if one drinks too much. But we do not believe a zero alcohol rule the right way to go.

Edited October 24, 2011 by regentrude

[4wildberrys]

We do drink wine in front of our kids on a daily basis now. When they were really little, dh would drink beer daily and I would occasionally. There is alcoholism on both sides of the family, but we feel like we know how to control ourselves. Our kids have seen LOTS of drunkenness, at some family gatherings over the years but mostly from our drunkenness saturated town! It's a VERY small town, very isolated chock full of all sorts of addicts---mostly alcoholics but many other drugs too. They are totally disgusted with alcohol and don't even like the taste---yes, we have offered them sips of champagne and wine and beer for the last few years. They have no interest, even though their friends get drunk regularly. I was raised in a very Eurocentric culture in CA, and so wine and very demystified. It was a classy thing to drink, enjoyed in moderation and appreciated for it's flavors, etc. Our town is also VEERRY Mormon, with everything closed on Sundays---yet has a 75-80% divorce rate, high incest rates and VERY high alcoholism rates. Go figure :001_huh:

[Crissy]

 

What do you base your practices on in terms of what type of alcohol consumption you do and don't expose your children to?

 

I never thought of it in terms of my children's exposure. I suppose that because there is no alcohol *abuse* in our home I don't view it as having a different place in my life than any other beverage.

 

I find the connection between food/drink and culture, and the seasonal nature of our meals fascinating. I think we all have personal traditions, and I don't put alcohol in a unique category in that regard.

I don't eat a piece of chocolate cake without a big glass of milk. I love hot tea on a cold night when I'm reading a book. I want a glass of big, oaky chardonnay with an appetizer of smoked salmon and capers. I find myself making beef stew with Guinness when the weather turns in the fall.

 

The statements folks are making in the other threads about not needing alcohol to have a good time and getting 'boozed up' don't make sense to me. For us, and I suspect for most people who drink, that sort of thing doesn't even enter into the equation.

Edited October 24, 2011 by Crissy

[PinkInTheBlue]

For me I feel I'm setting a more healthy environment discussing the safety of alcohol now rather than the environment I was previously a part of that stressed not allowing children (even teens) to see alcohol consumption and only discuss complete abstinence. I feel more responsible teaching rather than forcing fear.

 

Just this morning during school something brought up drinking and I said, "Hey guys, you know Dad and I don't believe consuming alcohol is wrong, correct? Of course abuse of anything is a bad idea. However, how often do you see Dad have a drink? Me? Right. Just because we don't believe alcohol is a sin doesn't mean that results in drunkenness. Even if I had a glass of wine with dinner doesn't mean that. Abuse is what we are teaching avoidance of."

 

They were gracious enough not to roll their eyes and too loudly say, "We know! We knew". :) We cover this in different topics often.

 

That's how we have come to feel in our house. :)

[ThatCyndiGirl]

I never thought of it in terms of my children's exposure. I suppose that because there is no alcohol *abuse* in our home I don't view it as having a different place in my life than any other beverage.

 

I find the connection between food/drink and culture, and the seasonal nature of our meals fascinating. I think we all have personal traditions, and I don't put alcohol in a unique category in that regard.

I don't eat a piece of chocolate cake without a big glass of milk. I love hot tea on a cold night when I'm reading a book. I want a glass of big, oaky chardonnay with an appetizer of smoked salmon and capers. I find myself making beef stew with Guinness when the weather turns in the fall.

 

The statements folks are making in the other threads about not needing alcohol to have a good time and such don't make sense to me. For us, and I suspect for most people who drink, that sort of thing doesn't even enter into the equation.

 

Yes, it is a different way of thinking. It reminds me of the kids who come home from the DARE program proclaiming to one and all that "Grandpa is a drug addict because he smokes cigarettes". :001_huh:

 

There seems to be no room for cultural awareness, differences, etc. I don't have a taste for wine, so when someone like the PP who I've quoted says, "a good oaky Chardonay" I can only nod and smile because I have no idea what that really means or how good it is. :confused: But,.....that doesn't mean that she is bad or wrong, just that I don't understand that particular experience.

[ktgrok]

We drink in front of the kids, and always have. Not to excess by any means. ONe or two drinks I would say. WE have had adult parties where some people drank more than that, but again, were not drunk or acting inappropriately. Not a big deal in my family culture. My son has also seen drunk people at theme parks, when we ran into friends that had been drinking too much. (and were not driving). We discussed their behavior with my son, and remarked on the fact that alcohol makes people act younger, and silly. I think this will help to counter the idea that keg parties make you seem grown up, lol.

[EmilyK]

I never thought of it in terms of my children's exposure. I suppose that because there is no alcohol *abuse* in our home I don't view it as having a different place in my life than any other beverage.

 

I agree with this. Until I read the other thread it wouldn't have occurred to me that it was a problem to have my kids see me or others drink in moderation, and I doubt we abstain in front of other people's kids when they're over. I'm more embarrassed about my dependence on a morning cup of coffee! That I do every day; drinking I don't.

 

Maybe some of this is regional? My husband and I grew up in other parts of the country, but here in the Pacific NW, brewpubs are just part of the social fabric, not like seedy bars. Our two neighborhood restaurants are brew pubs where they serve local beer and wine, as well as burgers and the like. They are both dominated by families with kids at meal times. I take my kids there even if I don't want beer or wine, just for some casual dining.

 

I certainly know people who don't drink and I respect that, but here (and the other places I've lived) drinking wine or beer with dinner isn't a loaded (im)moral statement the way it seems to be for some who posted.

[Crissy]

"Grandpa is a drug addict because he smokes cigarettes". :001_huh:

 

 

That reminds me of a conversation I overheard between my boys a few years ago.

My older son said, "Mom did NOT use drugs when she was a teenager!"

Younger son replied, "Yes she did! She smoked cigarettes. She told me."

[ThatCyndiGirl]

I agree with this. Until I read the other thread it wouldn't have occurred to me that it was a problem to have my kids see me or others drink in moderation, and I doubt we abstain in front of other people's kids when they're over. beer or wine, just for some casual dining.

 

I certainly know people who don't drink and I respect that, but here (and the other places I've lived) drinking wine or beer with dinner isn't a loaded (im)moral statement the way it seems to be for some who posted.

 

 

In the Midwest it ends up being a statement about many different topics. I once ordered a SAMPLE of wine with lunch while out with colleagues and you could hear a pin drop. It was like I had farted in church. :confused:

 

ETA: Please don't judge me for using the F word in this reply. I will likely be in therapy before the week is up. It may take some alcohol just to get over it!

Edited October 24, 2011 by ThatCyndiGirl

[Parker Martin]

Before we had our first son, I found a study done in the United States that showed that lower levels of alcohol exposure in the home correlated with lower rates of alcohol abuse. People who had no alcohol whatsoever in the home and never drank it in front of their children had the lowest rates of alcohol abuse among their children when the children became adults. I wish I still had a link to it.

 

Because of that study (and life experience that matched up to it), there is no alcohol in the house, and we don't drink at restaurants. Alcohol is only part of our lives at religious services.

 

As for the health benefits, we eat so many different things in the name of health benefits that I don't think we could fit in another one anyway. :tongue_smilie:

[Parker Martin]

The statements folks are making in the other threads about not needing alcohol to have a good time and such don't make sense to me. For us, and I suspect for most people who drink, that sort of thing doesn't even enter into the equation.

 

It enters into the equation for a lot of people. When my husband and I didn't want alcohol at our wedding celebration dinner, several family members were angry about it. The argument was that it made social situations so much easier. I think we relented in the end, but I don't remember.

 

How did I get old enough not to remember?!

 

I also know plenty of people who will say that that isn't part of it, but they get tipsy at every social function where alcohol is available. Being buzzed is clearly incorporated into their social functioning. Or they'll tell you that they don't drink much, but they get intoxicated enough to become boorish and annoying whenever alcohol is served.

 

But I agree that that isn't the deal for everyone. I've known people who truly enjoyed trying to pair the right wine with a meal or who drank specifically for health benefits.

[Crissy]

 

I also know plenty of people who will say that that isn't part of it, but they get tipsy at every social function where alcohol is available. Being buzzed is clearly incorporated into their social functioning. Or they'll tell you that they don't drink much, but they get intoxicated enough to become boorish and annoying whenever alcohol is served.

 

 

Unfortunately, I am familiar with that brand of drinker as well.

My experience is that they are the minority, although they are certainly the easiest to recognize. :D

[nono]

ETA: Please don't judge me for using the F word in this reply. I will likely be in therapy before the week is up. It may take some alcohol just to get over it!

 

You owe me a new keyboard. :lol:

[Mjfb]

What do you base your practices on in terms of what type of alcohol consumption you do and don't expose your children to?

 

Ahhh..

 

I come from a family who treated alcohol as a loaded gun. Many members of my mother's family are alcoholics. My father's family as well. My dad was an alcoholic when he was younger.

 

My father still reminds dh and I (on the rare day we are going to have some alone time) that we, "don't need alcohol to have a good time!" We're in our mid-thirties :lol:

 

BUT.

 

I think my own attitudes actually started before dh and I had kids. We had gone to a party, the host's 8yo daughter was there. The host got falling down drunk in front of her, slobbering all over her... it was awful.

 

Now, even if I wanted to actually have a drink in front of the kids, it is very very difficult for me. The thought makes my stomach turn. Dh occasionally has a beer, but never more than that.

 

Neither of my children has ever seen anyone drunk in real life, ever. Both know a little bit about alcohol (they know it is an adult beverage, they know it can make you act like an idiot), but we haven't really sat down and talked about it much. We try to make it mostly a non-issue: neither overly interesting, nor taboo.

[TravelingChris]

We don't have problems with alcohol in our household but my dh has alcoholics in his family. For that reason, we planned on having no alcohol at our wedding reception. My FIL, who at that time was still denying that his number three son was a full blown alcoholic, thought that was awful, left the reception and came back with a case of beer. That was promptly drunk by a few for my FIL and almost all by BIL. We certainly did not like that.

 

But what does that have to do with my dh getting a beer or two at a restaurant or ordering a glass of wine? He doesn't drive then, I do and he doesn't change his behavior from that little of alcohol. Yes, some people do. In particular, most Orientals can't handle hardly any alcohol. I read a book by a person who was a Peace Corp volunteer in China and he and his fellow Peace Corp volunteer (both Caucasians) were put in the strange position for them of drinking everyone under the table. It was some kind of strange faculty ritual that they soon tired of but the fact was that the Chinese got drunk on just a glass or two while the Caucasians certainly didn't. I don't know if that is why the Amerinds have such problems with alcohol. But anyway, not all, and in America, not most people have such extreme reactions to alcohol.

[nono]

. In particular, most Orientals can't handle hardly any alcohol. I read a book by a person who was a Peace Corp volunteer in China and he and his fellow Peace Corp volunteer (both Caucasians) were put in the strange position for them of drinking everyone under the table. It was some kind of strange faculty ritual that they soon tired of but the fact was that the Chinese got drunk on just a glass or two while the Caucasians certainly didn't. I don't know if that is why the Amerinds have such problems with alcohol. But anyway, not all, and in America, not most people have such extreme reactions to alcohol.

 

OK, I just fainted. :001_huh:

[In2why]

Alcohol is a mixed bad in our lives. Alcoholism does run in our family and I can't stand being around drunk people. I don't mind people drinking though and DH drinks beer and on rare occasions will have a mixed drink.

 

The kids know that drinking is an adult behavior and that some people can drink without problems and some people can't because they are alcoholics. They see drinking at social events like family cookouts, or other gatherings, but there are many events where there isn't any drinking so they know that people can have a good time without it.

[Mrs Mungo]

Oh dear.

[Lisbeth]

I am Mormon, but newly so. As in, I've been Mormon for two years. I have had drinks in the past, but now I've not had one for 3 years... the year of my LDS investigation + the two years I've been LDS. I don't miss it one whit, but I was never a major (or even moderate) drinker. My husband was raised Catholic but never drank. Never. He never has a great reason why - he just said it has no appeal for him.

I like the idea of not doing anything that alters my agency - or ability to make sound choices - but that is my personal religious viewpoint.

 

I think the test for whether people would drink without the buzz would be to sell alcohol-free 'wine' that tastes EXACTLY the same as real wine and see how it goes.

 

I believe that majority of people who drink wine "for the taste" are kidding themselves. I'm sure there are people who do, and to each his/her own! I would NOT impose my beliefs about alcohol on others. As long as there aren't drunken rages directed at me behind the wheel or otherwise...

 

As for the attitude in Europe vs. here...I saw the recent story of the young women lying in their own vomit and having sex in bushes in Britain and how it's become so out of control that the country is getting concerned... Nothing I would aspire to. The stats on alcohol use by high school and college aged students HERE are terrible as it is.

 

As Mormons, we of course teach our kids that alcohol is a big no no, but the funny thing is, my parents (atheists!) taught me close to the same thing - not that it was a sin or huge problem but that it was just foolish and embarrassing (THEIR words!). And I was never a big drinker. ;)

[TravelingChris]

I don't think you can make wine or beer that tastes the same with no alcohol.

[nono]

I think the test for whether people would drink without the buzz would be to sell alcohol-free 'wine' that tastes EXACTLY the same as real wine and see how it goes.

 

 

From your lips to some winegrower's ear! I don't like sodas, mixers, etc. Nothing sweet. I do like wine's taste; wine doesn't like me so much. Not in a drunken reaction, but in a lousy feeling of sluggishness the next day. So not worth it. Hence, I appear to be a wine snob, 'cause I'll go to tastings and do the spitting, because I enjoy the taste and eliminate the sluggish feeling in the morning.

 

I have found a pretty good non-alcoholic beer, and I drink one regularly now after my long runs (esp. because they end around 10 a.m.!)

[Elinor Everywhere]

DH and I drink regularly with meals (and without). We don't get drunk. I never drink when I'm out (not even one drink) if I'm going to drive. We mostly drink at home.

 

I don't base that on anything. We just do it. :lol:

 

Ok, ok. DH is from Germany. His entire family drinks regularly. Again, not to get drunk, but it's just part of what they do. So I guess I kinda just got into it with him. :tongue_smilie:

 

Both kids have had sips of wine out of curiosity. Neither one of them liked it though.

 

I would say this sounds like us (except the Germany part :D). We drink wine with dinner, although we'll have our first glass while dh is cooking dinner and we share news about our day. We've always done this - before & after kids.

 

I'd say my kids have been exposed to a lot of different things (good and bad, domestically and abroad, etc), but rarely have they seen drunk people. Well, there was my niece's wedding shower we had here, but let's not get into that.... :lol:

[Elinor Everywhere]

most Orientals can't handle hardly any alcohol.

 

Wow, that sure wasn't my experience living in Hong Kong for a year. They certainly can down the beer (saw that hugely in Japan, too), but most middle class Chinese are gaga for red wine. Expensive is best, lots is better. :D

[mcconnellboys]

I didn't say I was upset about it because I object to someone drinking in front of children or to them having a single drink with dinner.

 

I objected because if I ever have a minor in my charge who belongs to someone else, I am not going to do anything whatsoever that might even accidentally cause even a slight impairment to me or cause me any sort of problem.

 

What if I took out my son and a friend and had a drink with dinner. Then what if I got stopped by the police on the way home for any sort of minor infraction and they smelled alcohol on my breath and wanted to do a breathalyzer test, etc., etc.

 

I'm not saying such a thing is likely to happen, just that I don't want to take ANY sort of risk, no matter how small, with someone else's child in my car.

 

What if I'm taking some sort of medications or supplements and have no idea that they might react badly with my body chemistry mixed with even a little alcohol? What if that one drink does cause me some sort of inconvenient and unexpected impairment?

 

I just don't think it's my right to take such a chance, no matter how small, with someone else's child....

 

I can drink when I get home....

[TravelingChris]

Here is a wikipedia link that has more about ethnicity and alcohol tolerance and how it has to do with genetics, at least in part.

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alcohol_tolerance

[Ipsey]

My father is a beer drunk.

He probably gets tipsy/drunk on beer several times a week, and did so all of my years growing up.

 

It was horrible, and traumatic.

 

I can't stand alcohol, typically, but don't really have much of a problem with others drinking in moderation. I don't know how much of my dislike for alcohol is psychosomatic, or just. . .I don't like its taste.

 

My husband has one beer or a glass of wine once a week or two with dinner.

 

Maybe some of you remember my post a couple of months ago about finding something I could enjoy, tippling-wise. I wound up at the alcohol part of our local grocery store, planning on getting some fruit liqueur, but when I told the man there my challenge, he suggested this already mixed Kahlua White Russian stuff.

 

It's pretty good. I've it three times since that last thread (however long ago that was), I liked it well the first night, less the second time, even less the third time. I think I'm going to add some Hershey's syrup the next time I try it. :)

 

After this stuff is gone (it may take me another 5 months), I'll go back to the thread and see what else. Someone said hazelnut liqueur, which sounds AMAZING!

 

We went through about a year when my daughter (9) would get very mad and tearful about her dad having a beer with dinner because she told him it was a drug and he shouldn't do drugs.

 

It was strange, and we spent a lot of time talking, and still do from time to time, sometimes when her Daddy has a beer or wine.

 

Anyway, that's it here.

[In2why]

From your lips to some winegrower's ear! I don't like sodas, mixers, etc. Nothing sweet. I do like wine's taste; wine doesn't like me so much. Not in a drunken reaction, but in a lousy feeling of sluggishness the next day. So not worth it. Hence, I appear to be a wine snob, 'cause I'll go to tastings and do the spitting, because I enjoy the taste and eliminate the sluggish feeling in the morning.

 

I have found a pretty good non-alcoholic beer, and I drink one regularly now after my long runs (esp. because they end around 10 a.m.!)

 

 

You must share! I tried an O'Douls once and thought I was going to choke.

[Laurie4b]

In the Midwest it ends up being a statement about many different topics. I once ordered a SAMPLE of wine with lunch while out with colleagues and you could hear a pin drop. It was like I had farted in church. :confused:

 

ETA: Please don't judge me for using the F word in this reply. I will likely be in therapy before the week is up. It may take some alcohol just to get over it!

 

:lol::lol:

[nono]

You must share! I tried an O'Douls once and thought I was going to choke.

 

Kaliber, by Guiness (but not dark). I've also had Clausthaler once, which I think was even better, to my taste buds. Hard to find around here. I did bring it back from FL when I had the chance though. ;) Be aware, though, not calorie free. :glare:

 

Yeah, O'Douls is like the worst of both worlds (the soda world and the beer world).

[Ipsey]

:lol::lol:

 

Adding to funny church/alcohol shocks.

Where I grew up, Church of Christ meant Campbellites--alcohol was a HUGE no- no. Jesus drank grape juice, yanno. :)

 

So, imagine when I moved and was invited to a Chocolate Night at a Church of Christ. I about dropped dead when I saw women walking around sampling wine. It was a wine tasting, chocolate party with massages! I told them I had never seen such a Church of Christ. And they told me they had never heard of Campbellites.

 

Too Funny :)

[In2why]

Kaliber, by Guiness (but not dark). I've also had Clausthaler once, which I think was even better, to my taste buds. Hard to find around here. I did bring it back from FL when I had the chance though. ;) Be aware, though, not calorie free. :glare:

 

Yeah, O'Douls is like the worst of both worlds (the soda world and the beer world).

 

 

Thanks I will have to try them. We have a fabulous shop that will order them if they don't already carry them.

[ktgrok]

I didn't say I was upset about it because I object to someone drinking in front of children or to them having a single drink with dinner.

 

I objected because if I ever have a minor in my charge who belongs to someone else, I am not going to do anything whatsoever that might even accidentally cause even a slight impairment to me or cause me any sort of problem.

Would you drive them if you had gotten less sleep than usual the night before? Also a risk.

 

What if I took out my son and a friend and had a drink with dinner. Then what if I got stopped by the police on the way home for any sort of minor infraction and they smelled alcohol on my breath and wanted to do a breathalyzer test, etc., etc.

 

Then the would do the breathalyzer, and realize you were not over the limit. No problem. By the way, why would they stop you?? Are you saying you might speed while driving another person's child? How risky.

 

I'm not saying such a thing is likely to happen, just that I don't want to take ANY sort of risk, no matter how small, with someone else's child in my car.

 

What if I'm taking some sort of medications or supplements and have no idea that they might react badly with my body chemistry mixed with even a little alcohol? What if that one drink does cause me some sort of inconvenient and unexpected impairment?

 

I just don't think it's my right to take such a chance, no matter how small, with someone else's child....

 

I can drink when I get home....

 

I don't drink when out to eat with other people's children, I don't think, or really around them, not because I think it is unsafe, but because I don't want to upet someone if they have a religious opinion on the matter. A lot of Baptists here.

[ktgrok]

Kaliber, by Guiness (but not dark). I've also had Clausthaler once, which I think was even better, to my taste buds. Hard to find around here. I did bring it back from FL when I had the chance though. ;) Be aware, though, not calorie free. :glare:

 

Yeah, O'Douls is like the worst of both worlds (the soda world and the beer world).

 

When I was pregnant I had that, at a local pub. Good stuff as far as non alcoholic beer goes!

[Cassy]

My family, my parents generation, could probably have been described as heavy drinkers. No alcohol abuse. All were hard working, good, decent people. DH's family could probably be described likewise, although FIL is quite careful to drink very moderately.

 

In my twenties, however, I developed something of a drinking problem. I then abstained totally for five years. Nowadays I have half a bottle of wine with DH about once a month. The main reason I drink so infrequently is that I find that it drains my energy, and I have to be very careful about my energy levels.

 

My experience suggests to me that it's not the alcohol itself that causes problems. For me, it was unresolved emotional/psychological issues that caused my drinking problems, not the presence or absence of alcohol in my family/culture. Once those issues were dealt with my relationship with alcohol was no longer a problem.

 

DH has a small bottle of beer or a glass of wine every night. He is the most moderate man in every way that I've ever met, I have never seen him even remotely tipsy.

 

Cassy

[nono]

Here is a wikipedia link that has more about ethnicity and alcohol tolerance and how it has to do with genetics, at least in part.

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alcohol_tolerance

 

Not a lot to support that person's experience you related on a wider, cultural level. Up to 1/3 of Asians experiencing Asian Flush means that 2/3 don't. And Asian Flush doesn't equal an instant drunken state. It equals a blush. Which is uncomfortable! And, could lead to less drinking, not more!

 

Let's say a Chinese man came to visit a US college during homecoming. He might well return to his country and tell folks that Americans drink to excess, stay up too late and have loose morals. :glare: He'd be wrong to generalize to the entire culture based upon his singular experience. It's stereotyping, and as such has a nugget of truth extrapolated too far and it turns into an untruth. That's why I was fainting earlier. :)

Edited October 24, 2011 by nono
can't spell. even sober.

[SailorMom]

I think the test for whether people would drink without the buzz would be to sell alcohol-free 'wine' that tastes EXACTLY the same as real wine and see how it goes.

 

I believe that majority of people who drink wine "for the taste" are kidding themselves.

 

 

:lol::lol::lol:

 

This whole thread has me rolling....

 

Just an fyi - I do like wine FOR THE TASTE. Many people do. I do not like beer, whiskey, vodka, etc. - therefore I don't drink it. I like wine, so I do. Just because some people do not develope the taste or appreciation of good wine does not mean it doesn't taste good.

 

Me thinks you must not have had any good wine :D White Zin is pretty bad, and yet - everyone seems to buy it. Merlot - blech. But that's just me.

[SailorMom]

Orientals

 

:huh:

 

Wait - what decade are we in???

I don't think I've heard anyone use that term (or believe it was a good one to use) in about 30 years.

[Jenny in Atl]

:huh:

 

Wait - what decade are we in???

I don't think I've heard anyone use that term (or believe it was a good one to use) in about 30 years.

 

A Taiwanese friend of mine once said, "Orientals are rugs, not people."

 

Another fun bit... When some friends of mine hosted a Japanese Zen Buddhist Priest for a week, they almost went broke keeping his Sake cup warm and full. That man could drink all of us under the table in no time. :lol:

[nono]

:lol::lol::lol:

 

This whole thread has me rolling....

 

Ahem. Wait 10 years. Aging has not been kind to me in that way. :tongue_smilie:

[Crissy]

:lol::lol::lol:

 

This whole thread has me rolling....

 

Just an fyi - I do like wine FOR THE TASTE. Many people do. I do not like beer, whiskey, vodka, etc. - therefore I don't drink it. I like wine, so I do. Just because some people do not develope the taste or appreciation of good wine does not mean it doesn't taste good.

 

Me thinks you must not have had any good wine :D White Zin is pretty bad, and yet - everyone seems to buy it. Merlot - blech. But that's just me.

 

:iagree:

Have you had the unfortunate experience of having a glass of White Merlot poured for you? :ack2:

And, I have had non-alcoholic wine. It's worse.

 

 

I can drink when I get home....

 

When the point is pairing a great wine with a wonderful meal, having a glass at home hours later sort of misses the mark.

[mcconnellboys]

"Would you drive them if you had gotten less sleep than usual the night before? Also a risk."

 

I wouldn't be taking them out to eat at all if I were sleep deprived, and I thought we were discussing impairments caused by things that might be imbibed while dining....

 

"Then the would do the breathalyzer, and realize you were not over the limit. No problem. By the way, why would they stop you?? Are you saying you might speed while driving another person's child? How risky."

 

Actually if we proceeded back to the child's house and the first thing they told their parents was all about our police stop and my being checked for alcohol levels, then yes, it might be a problem between my family and theirs. And I was thinking of other times I've been stopped as an officer suggested that my stop had been a bit too "rolling;" stopped to tell me I had a signal light out or a brake light, etc. There are many reasons other than speeding for which one may be stopped.

 

The OP asked a question and since I replied shortly to the original thread, I thought I would attempt to explain to her why *I* would not do this and that it has nothing to do with religious beliefs, etc., for me. I believe I am allowed to pursue my beliefs on this issue, am I not? I have no idea why another person would wish to argue with me about my opinion.

[higginszoo]

I was raised in a home where one drink (usually wine) with dinner was a common occurrence. We were all given small amounts. As curious teens, we could have tastes of various things from beer to hard liquor and mixed drinks. It was all at home under supervision. And it took the mystique away pretty much completely. Two of us rarely drank while underage and never binged (we're both 30-something now). One did go through a phase (as a young Marine), but has pretty moderate attitudes toward alcohol now. Though my baby brother developed very expensive tastes, as my parents could afford fancier stuff with two of us grown and gone. Thankfully, his best friend is on the editorial staff of the Miami Herald's food and drink section, so he gets to go lots of places with her and her husband or as her escort when her dh can't be there.

 

Since it seemed to work much better than dh's family's complete prohibition of exposure to alcohol (though it was ok for adults, and sometimes Dad overdid a bit), it's the approach we're going with. At special occasions, the dc are offered a taste. We probably don't have wine or beer as regularly as my parents, but like them, it's generally only one. Sometimes they take us up on the offer of a taste, but most of the time, they pass.

[justamouse]

I love drinking, I cannot STAND being drunk (not you, if you're drunk I'll think you're hysterical and makes jokes with you-see why I cannot be drunk? Someone will think I'm hysterical and play with me, so I only get drunk for Dh)..

 

I just wanted you all to know that Dave Matthews Dreaming Tree Cabernet is good. Really Good. And inexpensive...

[ThatCyndiGirl]

Dave Matthews makes music AND wine?! :confused:

 

That man can do ANYTHING!!

[justamouse]

Dave Matthews makes music AND wine?! :confused:

 

That man can do ANYTHING!!

 

It just goes to show how perfect he is. :D

 

Edited October 25, 2011 by justamouse

[Rivka]

Adding to funny church/alcohol shocks.

Where I grew up, Church of Christ meant Campbellites--alcohol was a HUGE no- no. Jesus drank grape juice, yanno. :)

 

So, imagine when I moved and was invited to a Chocolate Night at a Church of Christ. I about dropped dead when I saw women walking around sampling wine. It was a wine tasting, chocolate party with massages! I told them I had never seen such a Church of Christ. And they told me they had never heard of Campbellites.

 

I grew up Congregationalist, and although our congregation was very socially liberal, there were aspects of our Calvinist heritage that were never relaxed. So the biggest shock to me after I converted to Unitarian-Universalism? Wine and beer are served at church dinners! I like it, but I don't think I'll ever get used to it. ;)