This was a first for me

[Daisy]

I got hit up for cash in a strip mall parking lot by a perfectly healthy male.

 

He was probably 19-22yo, clean cut, had on major name brand clothes (clothes I could never afford), and was smoking a pack of cigarettes.

 

He said, "My brother and I are homeless and are just trying to get enough money for a hotel room. Can you help us out?" I said, "Sorry, no," and kept on walking.

 

I watched him hit up an old lady and then another lady about my age. The other lady yelled (very loudly), "No, I'm not giving you any money! You look young and plenty healthy enough!"

 

I usually see mom with kids, pregnant teens, elderly street people, or people who are strung out. It is very common here. You get asked for money in the middle of the grocery store, in parking lots, at the gas station, etc. I usually try to keep water bottles or granola bars or something in the car that I can pass out. Because the weather is so nice year most of the year we have a huge homeless population.

 

But I've NEVER seen a perfectly healthy, clean, very well-dressed, literate male asking so brazenly for money.

 

So my question is this. Are you seeing more of this where you live?

 

Do you think the kid was really having trouble or is this was a joke or what?

 

I normally try to help people and I'm feeling a tad bit badly that I immediately blew this guy off. Tell me it was intuition and okay. :glare:

[Impish]

My MIL got suckered by a young man claiming he needed the $ for a locksmith. My eldest, (who was 12 at the time) was telling her it was a scam. :glare:

 

Same guy hit her up again 20 mins later.

 

I'll buy someone a meal, a snack, a drink (I'm broke a lot, lol) but I never give cash.

[Mama Geek]

Dh and I both got hit up by the same person at different times.

 

I have also seen one pack up his sign and be picked up in a $35000 SUV at the end of the day.

[4wildberrys]

That happened to me once probably 20 years ago. I also said 'No'. They're just playing a game due to young male cockiness. It's a joke to them. Very sad. :glare:

 

That same year I was hit up at a grocery store for food for money by a really lousy looking older man. I said no and drove away feeling really guilty, even though dh and I were struggling at the time. So I went to another grocery store and bought enough food for a meal or two and drove back to the other store and handed the bag to the guy----who was truly stunned and genuinely appreciative.

[AngelBee]

I have fallen for it more then 4 times in the past 10 years. The always say they ran out of gas. :001_huh:

 

I used to get angry. I figure though that I will let God judge.

 

Still sad either way.

[Tree House Academy]

This happened to me in a big city a few years ago while I was visiting my mom in the hospital. I had gone out to get something at the store and accidentally went to the bad side of town. This man came up asking for money and I told my son to GET IN THE CAR. What did he do??? He went and stood next to me! I felt it would be unsafe for my son if I said "no" and tried to make a quick dash and I ended up giving the guy my last $5! Then, he walked straight over to a woman driving a black mercedes and the sped off! GRRRR I still get annoyed with my nosey son over that one!!

[mom2denj]

We get alot of this here. People will come up to you in the grocery store and say they ran out of gas and ask for 3 or 4 dollars. I fell for it once.

I have fallen for it more then 4 times in the past 10 years. The always say they ran out of gas. :001_huh:

 

I used to get angry. I figure though that I will let God judge.

 

Still sad either way.

[BMW]

When I had to turn for financial aid last year and needed some documentation from a local state agency, I was astounded at the name brands... the expensive clothing and shoes that we could never buy... on people in line to get services. Truly sad. I would like to give more of an opinion... but I wont...

[The Girls' Mom]

Yep, happened to me just the other day at Target, only his "wife and kids are in the store" and he needed just $13 to make the hotel bill for the night. :glare: He turned down my offer to buy them some food..the scammers usually will.

[Hankins3]

I see it here too... I'm afraid it is just the times we are living in.

[KnitWit]

We are self-employed and can use *laborers* often. It's interesting to me that these guys never want a *job*. :glare: (Yes, we've offered)

[TXMomof4]

I have fallen for it more then 4 times in the past 10 years. The always say they ran out of gas. :001_huh:

 

I used to get angry. I figure though that I will let God judge.

 

Still sad either way.

 

I always offer to fill a gas can for them and if they can get their car to the gas station I'll fill their tank. I've never had any takers.

[Mejane]

I once handed someone a meal, then watched from my car as he dumped it in the trash, pulled out a wad of cash, and start counting it. :glare:

[Wabi Sabi]

When I had to turn for financial aid last year and needed some documentation from a local state agency, I was astounded at the name brands... the expensive clothing and shoes that we could never buy... on people in line to get services. Truly sad. I would like to give more of an opinion... but I wont...

 

I wouldn't be too quick to make any assumptions simply based off of shoes and clothing. You never know the back story. Perhaps those items were purchased before the family fell on hard times, they were gifts, they were bought on clearance or are hand-me-downs/cast-offs from a friend. Are some people irresponsible with their money and buy things they can't afford? Sure, but that's certainly not limited to those with lower incomes.

[IlluminatedAttic]

When we lived in a warmer climate we often saw panhandlers drive away at the end of the day in vehicles that we could never afford. Every once in a while there would be an article in the paper about some reporter that tried his or her luck at it in popular areas and came away with $200 to $400 a day all week. We would offer a meal if we thought the person was truly in need, but otherwise we just said a prayer and went on our way.

[LidiyaDawn]

I wouldn't be too quick to make any assumptions simply based off of shoes and clothing. You never know the back story. Perhaps those items were purchased before the family fell on hard times, they were gifts, they were bought on clearance or are hand-me-downs/cast-offs from a friend. Are some people irresponsible with their money and buy things they can't afford? Sure, but that's certainly not limited to those with lower incomes.

 

^^^ quite true. We have a fairly high (for the size of the city) homeless population here and when you see them, they are often wearing "expensive" clothing - because those are the donations that the shelter & second hand shop receive from city residents and businesses.

[beaners]

When I lived in Memphis, you couldn't swing a dead cat without someone asking you for change. The majority of the panhandlers had some serious drug issues. I know some people say that they always give something because they don't know who is lying and who actually needs the money. I think that those people have never lived in an area where you could get hit up for change by 50 different people in less than a mile's walk between your apartment and your job. I was a pretty heavy smoker at the time. I didn't give out change, but I did offer a cigarette to the guys who didn't curse me out for not giving them money.

 

There were a few well-dressed individuals from time to time, but the guys who slept in the alleys tended to run them off pretty quickly.

[msjones]

Pan-handling is rampant around here. We do offer snack bags that we keep in the van, but I never stand and open my wallet on the street.

 

The pan-handlers are almost always men, usually young-ish (under 40 or so).

 

There are many meal programs and shelters around here, so I think our area attracts a large transient population.

[Desert Rat]

Well, I don't know if you made the right decision or not, Daisy. But I do know that you never ignore your intuition.

I wouldn't judge him based on what he wearing (although he probably needs to find something more grubby if he's going to be panhandling successfully). Lots of people are hitting hard times or have been in hard times for awhile. Maybe he was doing well and had great clothes then fell on hard times. Maybe he got them from a friend. You never know. Jobs are hard to come by and it's hard to make enough money to live.

I work in a food pantry doing the paper work. I see lots of people who are employed full time (sometimes both parents in a family) and have to visit us to tide them over. Lots. I would estimate at least 25% of our clients are employed. That's really scary.

Anyway, trust your gut but I would still have handed him a granola bar if that's what you usually do (which I think is a great idea and I will be doing this also).