For those who have moved: please talk me off the ceiling

[Alicia64]

Ugh. Dh was up for a job in Richmond, VA. We live in CA. I have sooooo many days when I would love to move to the other coast and just try something new.

 

But dh never heard back and we thought the job went to someone else. Well, he got the call from a head honcho asking if he was still interested. He said they'd had changes in HR and needed to get this IT position filled.

 

Now I'm freaking out again. I don't want to move back east in the middle of the winter, for one. But mainly, I'm just scared. I'm rather introverted so it's not like I have 100 good friends here, but you know, I have some very well established roots.

 

Of course, we hs so that's not an issue. There's more $$ involved, so that would be nice.

 

I've just heard so many people saying, "Californians don't know how good they have it till they leave."

 

For all my big talk of wanting adventure, I'm a big wimp.

 

Has anyone successfully moved after being scared about the wisdom of it all. Remember, California is going south financially rapidly and my husband works for the state. He's nervous that his job won't always be there.

 

We're all nervous for CA.

 

Alley

[Ellie]

Yeah, California really is a very kewl place to live, but you know, Virginia is wonderful, too (even though the hs law is better in Calif, IMHO). It's beautiful, and there's SO much history, and you're close to a gazillion *other* historical places, and Washington, D.C. You're gonna love it. Wait until the spring when the azaleas are in bloom. There's nothing like azaleas. And forsythia. And tulips and daffodils. And history. Did I say history? What a great adventure you'll be having!

[Margo out of lurking]

I grew up in California, lived in Colorado for 20 years, and have been in Virginia for just over two.

 

I LOVE it here.

 

And the hs law is pretty easy, the only place I *wouldn't* want to hs is CA. CA is nice to visit, but I haven't even done that in a long time.

 

Moving in mid-winter shouldn't be that bad. I'm several hours west of Richmond, but it's a lovely city, with nice shopping (that's not a priority for me, but hey, it IS nice).

 

Yep, people love California. I would never consider moving back. Both of my (relatively young) parents have moved away from there too and don't miss it a bit.

 

I love, love, love VA, and I love the weather too...although CA and CO weather were very different!

[Vida Winter]

We have lived in the West for a good many years. Around 10 years ago we lived in Virginia for 3 years (dh doing residency at Univ of VA) and I absolutely hated to leave. We were in Charlottesville which is about 1.5 hours away from Richmond.

 

They do not have bad winters; maybe a little snow but not like the West. I would absolutely leave CA for VA, which is much more affordable. Just think of the history, the museums, etc... - it is a homeschooler's dream.

 

Go for it - and good luck!

[Alicia64]

Seriously, I got teary reading your responses. What a relief. I'm a huge history buff. I was afraid you'd say, "once you've seen stuff, you've seen it."

 

Can you tell me about the summers? And bugs? I'm spider phobic.

 

I hope people will keep posting -- it's really helping.

 

Alley

[Vida Winter]

Seriously, I got teary reading your responses. What a relief. I'm a huge history buff. I was afraid you'd say, "once you've seen stuff, you've seen it."

 

Can you tell me about the summers? And bugs? I'm spider phobic.

 

I hope people will keep posting -- it's really helping.

 

Alley

 

The summers are very hot and you will need a/c, but it's not as bad as a Florida summer, because it is shorter. They get some spectacular thunderstorms at times. The beach is a good day trip when it gets hot. There are four distinct seasons. Spring is absolutely glorious -- I'll never forget the beautiful blooming dogwoods and other brilliant colors. Same with autumn - spectacular.

 

We did have a few large spiders, but again - not as bad as what you'd get further south. We had no cockroaches. No fleas on our dog.

 

It would take *years* to see all the historical sites and museums that are worth seeing. If you love history, it is incredible. I want to go back and see more (our 26 yr old son still lives there).

[ThatCyndiGirl]

A couple years into our marraige we moved to Panama. (the isthmus, not the city in Florida) Then, four years later we moved back to the States, but to a different state than we started out in. It was an adjustment, sure. DH is the introverted one. I am not.

 

Panama was hot and nasty and had flying roaches the size of a standard sandal. (I'm not kidding) But,....we made it and are stronger people for the adventure.

[Daisy]

I've lived in all four corners of this country.

 

I've spent the last 13 years in California.

 

I'd leave this state in a nanosecond and never look back.

 

Flee, while you still can. Run away! :001_smile:

[ThatCyndiGirl]

I'd leave this state in a nanosecond and never look back.

 

Flee, while you still can. Run away! :001_smile:

 

 

I feel the same way about Oklahoma. (Earl Gray, if you are reading this, I mean I don't like Oklahoma EXCEPT FOR YOU!!!)

[Mrs Mungo]

I grew up living in the same house, my entire life, until I got married. A year after our marriage, we started our adventure. Our first duty station was in the middle of the Mojave desert, an hour from the nearest town of Barstow (and if you're from CA, you know what that means). I probably cried most of the way to California. We've since lived in Virginia, 2 different places in Germany, North Carolina and Hawaii. I won't say that I've loved every minute of it. There are good and bad things about everywhere you live. It's sometimes very hard to be so far from our families. But, we make it work. We find a church, we plug into activities, we find a homeschool group, whatever there is to do we give it a try. We stretch our boundaries. We find new hobbies. We miss old friends and favorite restaurants. We find new ones.

 

It will be okay. :grouphug:

 

eta: Cyndi, ha! How funny that I would post right under you, I'm from Oklahoma originally!

[ThatCyndiGirl]

Well, Mungo, I'm sure it was TONS BETTER when you were here! ;)

[hsbaby]

We moved from CA about 4 years ago. It was, of course, hard to leave our friends and family as that as where both my dh and I grew up. However, now that we have "roots" in our new town (we're in TN), I would never go back!!! I don't miss the crowds, the traffic, the crazy cost of living....I could go on and on. In fact, I think my distaste for CA grew once I actually got out. I came out here and was shocked that the freeways were tree lined, random people will wave to you when you drive, the hills aren't covered with subdivisions (they actually have trees!). My point is, i'm sure there will be a lot of positives to living in VA. You just have to find them and know that you will have to work at establishing roots. For me, I had to join play groups, homeschool groups, etc. to get out and meet people. Now I have a great group of friends. Best of luck to you!!!!

[DawnM]

We moved from Los Angeles to Charlotte, NC four years ago.

 

Please PM me if you want to.

 

Here is what I did mentally:

 

I told myself I was willing to do it for TWO years minimum. I can do anything for two years. I asked DH if we could move back to CA after two years if I absolutely hated it.

 

Now, I won't tell you that it is always peaches and cream. Somedays I miss CA so badly that I have tears.

 

But I now have friends and it is a great place to homeschool! We could literally do something with homeschoolers all 5 days a week if we chose to!

 

Dawn

[DawnM]

Oh, and we drove across the country in February, so we have moved in the winter.

 

Dawn

[MidnightHM]

We are doing something very similar. We are moving from Fl to Indianapolis in mid Dec. I was born here and have seen snow maybe twice. Just know your not alone.:grouphug:

[lllll]

We've moved a lot. Born in TX. Moved from SC to NC to Northern VA to ID to NH to Southwestern VA. I also lived in GA and LA in my younger years. (Our dc were born in SC, NC, Northern VA, and ID.) And I moved to 3 of those places sight unseen! And .... dh's job is moving to a nearby city this winter. So we may be moving/renting again. Depends on whether we can hold on to this house and get a place to live over there - all at the same time. We may end up in the camper if we want to hold on to this property. :001_huh:

 

The way I came to look at it was that I may as well enjoy the sights where I was at, because chances were we wouldn't be there long anyway. There were things I loved and things I hated about all the places we've lived. But we always seemed to move at just the right time. Relatives becoming difficult. Better hs'ing laws when I needed them. Cheaper cost of living. Etc. I learned to relax and realize the Lord had a purpose behind all of it.

 

Also, it might help to realize that there could be a definite culture shock, initially. Just because we all live in the same country doesn't mean we all function in the same 'culture'. Get hold of it up front and it could make your adjustment smoother.

 

HTH

Kathy

[abbeyej]

...Somedays I miss CA so badly that I have tears....

 

It's been more than five years now for me (hard to believe!) since making a similar move (LA to Atlanta). I really am content where I am. But sometimes the sun feels just a certain way and the temperature and the breeze... And I just desperately miss my old home.

 

But I'm also not sure I would move back. I have friends here, community here, and while I loved my time in LA, there were certainly drawbacks as well.

[Mary in VA]

I grew up in Washington and Oregon and then joined the Air Force and married another AF member. We have lived all over the world - Asia, Europe and three tours in VA. When my husband retired we stayed right here in northern VA. The winters aren't bad and as others have said the spring and fall are beautiful. The summer is HOT and HUMID! The first time I came here straight from Oregon and I felt like I was constantly covered with a wet wool blanket. But now I'm totally used to it :001_smile: Last August I was talking with a visitor from California who was wilting under the heat and I realized it wasn't bothering me. So, you will get acclimated. Plus, everything is air conditioned.

 

Also, within a reasonable drive from Richmond you have Williamsburg, Yorktown, Jamestown, DC and all sorts of Civil War battlefields!

 

You can do it!

 

HTH,

Mary

[Ritsumei]

We've moved quite a bit too. Church a wonderful thing for us! It's a group of people to get to know, to do things with. If you're not religious, then I'd definitely find some other type of service organization, get involved at the library... something. Something that will help you make commitments to get out there and meet people. Maybe do a unit study on the new area to help you get acquainted. I'll bet the librarians would love to help you do that sort of thing. Plant a garden. It'll help you get in tune with the new climate, plus it'll lead to meeting new people. Look into city programs. I just found out that our parks department has a group of herbalists that meets monthly. Who knows what other sort of interesting stuff I'm missing because I've never asked!

[Ritsumei]

We are doing something very similar. We are moving from Fl to Indianapolis in mid Dec. I was born here and have seen snow maybe twice. Just know your not alone.:grouphug:

 

You have GOT to go to the Feast of the Hunter's Moon! It's a wonderful French & War reenactment in the fall. We went when my husband was a student at Purdue (Lafayette, about an hour north), and love it. We'd hoped to make it back this fall, but didn't have the money at the right time. I don't know Indy very well, but the Lafayette area still feels like home 10 years later. We just loved it there. Lots of happy memories. And they don't get the snow like they used to.

[newbie]

I've lived in all four corners of this country.

 

I've spent the last 13 years in California.

 

I'd leave this state in a nanosecond and never look back.

 

Flee, while you still can. Run away! :001_smile:

 

I agree, run and never look back.

[Brigitte]

I grew up in Charlottesville, VA and currently live in the southwestern tip of the state. After high school I moved around quite a bit (CA, TX, FL, CT, NC). We are happy to be back in Virginia. If I had to live in a big city, it would be Richmond. It has a great central location (close to the beach, mountains, DC). It has a lot going on culturally. Yet, Richmond still has a bit of a small town feel in certain areas. The cost of living in Richmond is going to be far less than what you have in CA and it is lower than Northern Va. or Charlottesville.

 

Spring and fall are spectacular. Winter is pretty mild. Summer gets hot and humid, but not unbearable. People are friendly, too.

 

I think you will like it.

[lionfamily1999]

This has been a very mild winter so far, but then... winter doesn't usually kick in till the end of December through February ;)

 

I've lived here nearly all my life (6 mo stint in Md), I wouldn't live anywhere else. The neighbors we have from CA (there are a couple, go figure), tend to say that we're more "real" (?). None of them want to move back and they're all pretty happy to raise their kids out here.

 

Enjoy and (almost) Welcome!

[Alicia64]

Ha! Ha! Those of you who are posting "run and never look back" are cracking me up. Are you sure that isn't just a So. Cal feeling. No. Cal is a little less congested.

 

My parents are from So. Cal and my sister lived in San Diego for years and I have no interest in moving down there.

 

I really, really, really appreciate your perspectives. You've seriously helped me to feel better.

 

It really is a neat opportunity for dh and here I am acting like a big baby. If we moved every 2 years or something, it would be one thing. But I've been in this town for 25 years. Do people move at 45 years of age successfully??

 

Thanks again!!!!!!

 

Alley

[Guest janainaz]

I lived in CA most of my life and I have a difficult time with change now that I have kids (everything is a memory for me). However, I have always loved the idea of living on the east coast and experiencing life over there. I would jump at the chance. Change does make life exciting, even though it can be a big adjustment. I know what that feels like to want the change, but to be terrified at the same time.

 

I'd love to be you moving from AZ to Virginia! Just flow with it and know that being freaked out is pretty normal. You only have one life though - just enjoy the adventure part of it.

[AFwife Claire]

We also are stationed in VA right now, and we are really enjoying it. We live in Northern VA, but my dh's sister's family lives in Richmond, and we have been down there many times to visit. We love it that we can stay the night at their house, then drive over to Williamsburg and all the historic places, without having to spend a lot of money on a hotel! Richmond seems to me to be a lovely city. And I don't think the winters are bad at all! Last year my boys hardly wore more than a hoodie the whole season! It snowed a few times, so they would put on their show stuff to play in it, but they never wore their big coats around otherwise. So I wouldn't worry at all about moving here in the winter!

 

My brother and sister-in-law moved from the Sacramento area to Texas a few years ago. My SIL had never lived outside of northern CA (except for 4 years of college at Liberty, which she did really enjoy), and you could never have told her a single bad thing about CA because she was convinced it was absolute paradise on earth! Every time she came to visit us in Ohio or wherever we were living, she was all about how great CA was in comparison--although she would agree that the cost of living was outrageous, the schools were becoming more and more liberal, etc. But still--paradise on earth! (While we on the outside all thought there was not enough money on earth to convince us to EVER move to CA!!) She was convinced she would hate Texas, mainly because it wasn't CA, and she had a terrible attitude about the move for a few years, even while enjoying the lower cost of living, more house for the money, etc. But now that she has been there for 4 years, she is really liking Texas, and she is seeing that really there are wonderful things about each place you move. And she is not really interested in moving back to CA, which is something I find totally amazing! She is now able to clearly see a lot of CA's serious issues, which she just really couldn't see while she was living there, and was convinced that no other place on earth could possibly measure up. I will say that it is a lot easier to talk to her now, LOL! : ) So I would just advise you to be open to the good things that are here, and I think you will really enjoy VA! It's a great place to live!

[5LittleMonkeys]

My family and I moved from TN to CO in 2004 then 2 years later sold our house in CO and traveled exclusively for about 8 months all around the western states (2 adults, 4 kids and 2 dogs in a 38ft. 5th wheel RV

...fun, fun, fun) then moved back to TN. I loved it!

 

When we first decided to move to CO I was very nervous because we had been in TN for 18 years at that point and had friends and routines, etc. etc. But the more I thought about it the more I became excited about all the new things we would get to see and experience and realized that ultimately I didn't care where we lived as long as my husband, myself and my kids were all together. It actually made us much closer, especially while we were traveling.

 

One other benefit of us moving is that up until we moved to CO we only had 3 girls and thought since girls are prevalent in both our families we would continue to have girls but SURPRISE, while in CO we had our 1st and only little boy! When we moved back to TN we had another girl. We tell everyone that it was the increase in altitude that gave us that boy. LOL

 

I bet if you were to list the pros and cons of moving vs. staying you would see the logical choice clearly. If you're a logical person that may help ease your fears. If you're like me and follow your heart then send out those We're Moving postcards to everyone and dive in to your new adventure!

[Michelle in AL]

I've moved a lot as child, but only had one major move post children. We moved from the South to the Midwest.

 

When I began to get the blahs, due to being lonely, feeling out of sorts etc, I would load the kids into the van and take them somewhere fun, usually the Children's museum, state park or the zoo. It helped tremendously. You'll probably have lots of great places to explore in VA, both outdoors and in. Winters won't bee too bad either.

 

Joining a homeschool group helps too. A friend of mine moved to Richmond yrs ago and they had lots of hs activities to choose from.

[Jen in PA]

Richmond is absolutely lovely. I can't say enough good things about that entire area and the folks who live there.

[grace'smom]

We live in Richmond, VA. I don't think there's a better place to homeschool as far as your access to early American history. Your are driving distance to so many major historical sites and museums. DC is two hours away, Williamsburg/Jamestown/Charlottesville are all one hour. Richmond itself is FULL of civil war history. There are canons laying around in random places that were just left there after the war. (No ammo though, don't worry). It's an opportunity to see so many wonderful things... I love that we can decide on a whim to visit somewhere that so many people have to plan months in advance to visit. It's a wonderful, wonderful benefit to the area.

 

If you get to choose the area that you live in, Chesterfield County has many homeschoolers and is pretty organized in that regard. Field trips, co ops and homeschool classes/events/sports teams are all located easily in that county. I think there are homeschoolers everywhere, but Chesterfield is more plentiful. I believe there are 2000 homeschoolers in Chesterfield. Richmond City has a good many as well. The West End in Henrico is nice too if you are a shopping kind of person (Whole Foods, Trader Joes, massive malls).

 

The homeschool laws here are pretty easy. And the people are friendly. Email me if you want more info on the area. There's 3 counties that are all close to Richmond, so you have many places to choose from for housing, and they are all different.

 

I don't think there's any more spiders here than in CA. The weather is pretty tame out here. Not many major storms, wildfires, floods, tornados, earthquakes or anything like that. Just 4 beautiful seasons and the occasional snow.