Depends on how much work you want to do. Using Expedia is probably fine. I love travel planning so use a large number/variety of websites etc. For flights I generally check on Kayak (working with various combinations of dates/airports). Hotel prices I try to use a comparison website/different providers/the hotel/resort's own website. Depending on what I am looking for I may look at hotwire/priceline/ebay I use TripAdvisor to check out the quality etc. of hotels Depending on what kind of trip it is I may use various forums (for Disneyworld, cruises, timeshares etc.) As far as sitting on their own is concerned, I wouldn't worry about it for teenagers. Maybe have a talk with them beforehand to speak up if something untoward happens (would never have occured to me)

Is there a specific reason for her visit? Has she done this before (just show up and stay without an end date)? It sounds so strange to me (but may not be depending on the individual family) I would wonder if there is a reason for it (e.g. money is tight and she can't afford to heat her own home or all of her friends have died lately and she is lonely etc.). If there is a reason it would make a difference to how I would feel and solving the underlying problem would get her out faster. If there is no such reason I would think this very strange if she were to stay more than a week (at the most). I definitely would talk to your dh - he needs to step up.

I think there is a difference though between when people are actually able to be completely independent and when they should legally be adults. The first depends on so many things, from personal maturity to educational choices. And most families are willing to help kids after they turn 18. Even when I was in my thirties my parents still helped me if needed and I know they would have let me move in (or whatever) if it had been necessary. That's just what families do. However, that doesn't mean people shouldn't be able to make their own decisions. I was not "independent" at 25 - I was still in college and my parents were paying (I live overseas and that is quite normal here). But I lived in a city 2 hours away from them and did my own thing. And honestly, I was never "wild" and my behavior was far from risky. Even if choices aren't always the best, the same can be said at any age.

Is there a place your husband has always wanted to visit?

Well, I know several blended families that seem to work out fine (though of course you never know). I have kids but am not married so can't speak from experience but honestly don't see why it should be more of a mess than other families. Obviously, the more people you add into the mix the more likely there are some problems and different family styles will be harder to reconcile when the kids are already older. But I don't see why one couldn't care just as much about a partner's kids as ones own? I used to work as a nanny and I just adored the kids. If I were to meet someone with kids it would be an important factor how I felt about them. Unless they were already grown up, I would never marry someone if I didn't feel I could deeply care for his kids. So kids might be a reason not to marry someone for me but if I did I would care about the kids.

I wouldn't worry about it. I generally carry cash/credit cards/passports in a small pouch under my shirt whenever I travel (no matter where) and it is a good idea to keep track of your purse (i.e. carry it more in front). Anything else is overkill in my opinion. And Austria is hardly a hotbed of crime.

Not really. I am not prone to anxiety though so that may explain it. I am more worried about end-of-the-world scenarios than I used to be. I think it is due to recent political developments but it may be that I am just paying more attention than I used to. Still, it is more an intellectual worry than anxiety so not sure that counts.

I say leave - tell them that your kids just need you more than you expected and it isn't working for you.

I am not sure if my point is coming across - I do think she could save money. But I don't think she is unusual or necessarily wasteful. She is having fun and living within her means. Obviously, a bit more savings would be good. When I was talking about eating most meals out I was mostly thinking of lunch in the cafeteria. I have worked in various offices both of large companies and government agencies and teams just go to lunch together. Of course you don't always have to go but if you do not have a good reason it would seem strange. After all, everyone has to eat and it is generally cheaper than most alternatives (if you don't want to bring something along). At the last job I worked I actually never went along as I only worked part-time and left around 1 (and would have had to stay longer if I took a lunch break). So I did have a good reason that people understood - still I think it hurt a bit as it makes you the odd one out. When I worked as an auditor we generally ate lunch together (either in a client's cafeteria or a restaurant). If at a restaurant, the manager often picked up the bill. If not, people went to cheaper places. But not going along would have been weird - especially if out of town. It is just part of the culture.

I would assume so. And I think it depends - I have eaten at various cafeterias (I used to be an auditor so ate at various clients' cafeterias) and I don't recall ever seeing someone do that. You probably could and if you are really hard up for cash you might have to. But it doesn't sound like she is having problems making ends meet, just saving enough for a house. Most places I have been it would be a bit strange. I didn't really read it as her complaining. I think being able to buy a decent apartment as a single person in London would be difficult. Sure, you can do it but personally I don't think it would be worth the sacrifices. I would not want to spend years not going out with co-workers etc. just so that I could maybe one day afford something. Yes, you could probably save by buying cheaper food etc. but depending on the job it may be necessary to eat most meals together. Most places I have worked at (obviously this may be quite different in other industries/businesses) you are expected to share lunch at least. And there would be a social cost if you don't. I once was out on a job with someone who did not come along and if I had to choose someone to go to the same client the next year I probably would not have chosen her. Wwell, I would have if she had been outstanding otherwise but all else being equal I would have prefered someone to eat lunch/dinner with (and if it is customary it does give the impression the person just doesn't like you). I guess I can see the going out for dinner part as being a bit excessive but lunch in the cafeteria? I give my kids about that amount (4.50) if they have afternoon classes so they can eat in the cafeteria/get take-out etc.

II honestly don't quite understand why most here seem to think the spending is excessive/wasteful. I absolutely do agree that she could save money but it doesn't seem like she is spending more than she makes (she saves a small amount every month I believe). In my experience, eating in the work canteen is often part of the job. I have had various jobs where everyone eats there and you would definitely be the odd one out. I once had a colleague who did bring in food instead to save money and of course it is okay - but it also seems a bit "unfriendly". Most places I have worked at, people in an office/team stop working at say noon and go to eat together. Not going along would not necessarily be conducive to good working relationships (not necessarily horrible but just a bit strange). Often people also talk about work stuff there, it is a chance to get the manager better etc. It really is almost a necessitiy. Again, it depends. Obviously, saving is always good but life is quite a bit less precarious in Europe. Not sure about the UK but assuming it is the same as where I live, people rarely get fired (unless down-sizing of company or doing something really wrong), you get paid (maybe a bit less but still) if sick even if it is for a longer period etc. Of course stuff still happens but if you are healthy, well-educated, and young, there isn't much need for existential worries (especially if there is some family in the background that would help if absolutely necessary). Also, most of her "excessive" expenses are ones she could easily cut out (holidays, going out etc.). I would be much more concerned if she bought an expensive car, furniture etc. and had to pay them off. I am not saying that saving would be a bad idea or that she couldn't cut down but I think her lifestyle seems fairly typical and as she does still save money and does not spend more than she can afford it seems fine to me.

Actually, I don't find the spending wasteful/unusual given the circumstances. I just skimmed the article, but lunch seems mostly to be at work/fairly inexpensive. Then the author goes out quite a bit after work for dinner/drinks. Obviously, most of us are in a different phase of life but for someone that age without family it doesn't seem unusual (nor do the amounts seem excessive). Of course, it would be possible to save money but it doesn't sound like the writer spends more than she earns (she even manages to save a bit). Saving up for something big doesn't seem a huge priority and honestly, while it is great to own your own home it isn't absolutely necessary (especially for a single person). Also, assuming she wants to stay in London the cost for a decent place is probably so high that it would take quite a while and a lot of saving to manage it. Honestly, I am not sure I would advise someone in their twenties, living in London, going out with friends etc. to completely cut all that out and to save up for the next 20 years. ETA: When I was a bit older and living in LA, I definitely ate lunch out most days (think Chilis, TGIF etc.) and had take-out etc. for dinner. Granted, I rarely had to pay as it was part of work and generally paid for by the client but as far as the lifestyle is concerned it seems fairly normal. I am somewhat boring so didn't go out that much on the weekend etc. but obviously most young people would do that. And depending on work hours, it rather makes sense. I generally left for work at 8 am in the morning and rarely got back before 10 pm. Unless you love cooking, it doesn't seem to make sense spending the little free time you have in the kitchen (especially for one person which often isn't that economical anyway).

I am sure you are right - it is a very different experience staying for a longer time with people living there and enjoying the atmosphere of a city (we did enjoy what we saw and the atmosphere). So I didn't mean to imply that it isn't a cool city - I just couldn't find many sights that sounded exciting when I thought we would spend another day there. But I will follow the thread to see what else people are recommending in case we do get to go back again!

I have to admit I am far from an expert as I only have been to Athens once on a cruise but personally, I think it is one of the less interesting cities. It definitely is good for a day (or maybe two) - we visited the acropolis (kids were rather disappointed due to the scaffolding/renovations etc.), the plaka (I think that is what it was called), and the old town/shopping area. It was nice but I don't think there were many sights we missed out on (well, we didn't visit the main museum but that is it). We went on a second cruise to Greece and I had a hard time coming up with something to do in Athens (I could find weeks of stuff to do in London, Rome, etc.) but as it turned out that stop got cancelled and we went to Split instead! Maybe take a look at Tripadvisor/a travel guide to see which attractions you are interested in? Don't get me wrong - I did enjoy the day we spent there but I just don't think there are that many touristy things to do for a longer stay. Personally, I would combine a day or two in Athens with some time at the beach/on an island etc.

How about some cool, mad scientist Alfred Einstein-cocktail? You could probably look at Halloween drinks for some inspiration. Or a Merry Monroe salad? Small pizzas in letter shapes for Shakespeare? So much fun planning a party like that (I am unfortunately not so good with the follow-through). Be sure to let us know what you decide!

Maybe something cool looking with Jello? You could give it a Jetson-like look or something space-blue and maybe suspend something nifty in it? Or you could choose a dish/snack for each of the main characters and make something that goes with it. Like a pizza that looks like a painter's palette for Renbrant or something like this the party paper desert plate I found when googling to put something on? Or something mathy for Einstein - maybe something with numbers or dice or something like that?

Maybe you could serve chips, salsa, and some other dip(s) in some sort of weird contraption? Otherwise I am a bit stumped. What is the murder mystery about? Maybe that would help with some ideas...

I would definitely and always get travel insurance. We have had to use ours several times. As we live in Europe, our experience probably doesn't quite apply to you but at least here the insurance is quite cheap (we pay around $25 per year for the family) and will pretty much cover everything. Regular insurance may cover only part - when the kids were smaller they got sick in Spain and our regular insurance did pay what is considered "normal costs" but the doctor was associated with the hotel and came to the room etc. and cost a lot more. Luckily we got reimbursed by the additional travel insurance. And yes, you will likely be required to pay upfront as long as it isn't a large bill.

Maybe check some more on dude ranches? I went many years ago and it was a lot of fun. I think there are ones at different levels of fancy - and price, though I think they are generally not the cheapest. Otherwise, I would go for a national park in the west. Maybe Yosemite - I think there are planned tours too.

Interesting. I feel so so bad for these kids but I don't feel especially vengeful to the parents (and I am not the most merciful). I guess I think they must be be so "off", sick, mentally disturbed that I don't even feel mad at them (though their actions are of course horrible). I guess I feel that no reasonable normal person could voluntarily treat their kids like this while having a grasp on reality.

I would stay home - I think going to church with small kids when there is so much flu around and you feel worried about it would be kind of hubris. While in college I once went to church in spite of iced over streets and fell and hit my head hard - I promised myself then not to do something so silly again. Watch a service on TV/internet/radio etc. if you feel guilty. Also, just wanted to say that I envy you the packed church (outside of flu season). We have a large church with a loud organ but othern than on special holidays there are many completely empty pews and most just have a couple of people at most. Quite depressing actually.

We have been on several Royal Caribbean cruises and really liked them. As far as I have heard, Norwegian is quite similar as far as quality is concerned though there are certain differences (offered activities, dining choices etc.). I don't think you can go really wrong with either one (well, there is always the unlucky cruise with bad weather, illness etc. but that can't be predicted). I would look at the cruises offered from where you want to leave from and see what itineraries/ship activities sound good to you. And then I would choose based on price. Also, as it sounds like you want to avoid party cruises I would go for a longer (i.e. at least 7 days) cruise as shorter cruises tend to be wilder (I have heard, no personal experience).

Well, I am kind of in between. I think there should be some regulations/controls and these will stop a certain amount of abuse. But to completely eradicate all abuse you would have to have so many controls that it would seriously impact freedom. Obviously, there will be different ideas about the right amount of controls. But either extreme seems to me less than optimal.

Well, the whole scenario is so far out of my realm of experience that it is hard to wrap my head around it but... Sometimes we get caught up in a situation and do stuff we shouldn't have done. It happens. There may have been more or less valid reasons. But ultimately our actions are our responsibility. That doesn't mean we have to beat ourselves up about it but we need to own it, learn from it, move on etc. I hate disagreements/disharmony but this is just taking it too far. If you don't want to go home with someone just say so. And if you feel uncomfortable get up and leave (I am assuming here that there is no violence/threat of violence involved as nothing like that was indicated). I mean if you feel uncomfortable saying "I don't want to have S** with you" you can just say "Gee, I remember I need to feed my cat" or whatever (yes, that is maybe kind of cowardly but still better than the alternative). And I am sorry but if there really is a significant number of women who will go along with almost anything because they are conditioned to it by society, then society must change. BUT it is not the responsibility of a stranger to ensure that her unspoken (and possibly unconscious) wishes are fulfilled. He is not a mind reader. And honestly how patronizing would it be if one went home with a stranger to have sex (okay, still can't quite wrap my mind around this but let's assume) and he suddenly stopped because he "guessed" that you would rather not do what you were doing? I am feeling kind of bad for Anseri - I was looking for a show to watch on Netflix and started Parks and Recreation (which I have never seen) and apparently he is in it. Anyway, every time he shows up on screen I can't stop myself from thinking about intimate details I now know about him that I have absolutely no business knowing...

Aside of some sort of oversight for homeschooling, a mandated health check every one or two years might be reasonable. It could find major abuse (injuries, malnutrition) and some stuff that just didn't get noticed without any malicious intent. It would also be fairly non-intrusive as long as guidelines were clear and not too strict (i.e. not every little bruise on a kid is a sign of abuse).