Oh, I love my chooks too! I cant get my family to share my excitement though. It's amazing how life turns out, isn't it? I would never have guessed I would be married for 20 years and living in the burbs! Enjoy!

Industry uses (and wastes) soooooo much more water than domestic in my city. Yes, we live in a city and its on the edge of a desert and we are supposed to be somewhat water conscious. I honestly feel my showers do not make much difference and we are not in a dire water problem issue at the moment. I probably waste more watering my vegie patch which is rather unproductive at the moment. I have lived with water tanks and adjusted my shower time accordingly- I can save water very well if I need to- I just don't reallly need to. I have some short showers (1-2 minutes) and some long showers (10 minutes) and sometimes a bath. Other days we have a spa and I don't shower at all. What is wastage anyway? Wastage would be if I just left the water running and didn't use it. If I am using the water and appreciating it and it gives me great joy- how is that different from the thousands of other ways people use resources for recreation? I consider dh to be wasting electricity when he puts the air conditioner on all day every day in summer even though our house is well designed and I don't feel the need for it many days, or at least mornings. But to him, thats not wastage and he is prepared to pay the (exhorbitant) electricity bill because being cool in hot weather is very important to him. Wastage is a very subjective concept. I would consider plastic wrapping a waste of resources, but we all use them. Water- I consider a natural element essential to life.

Yes, don't let him bite- he's old enough to understand that one. I yelled and pushed them off. They stopped biting pretty quickly. I breastfed my first for 5 years and my 2nd for 3.5- they tandem fed for 3.5 years and then weaned themselves together after having a discussion with each other! Its unpredictable...but as others have said, you can set boundaries. I night weaned my younger when he was 2.5 and put him to bed with his sister- I needed my sleep. He cried once and then accepted it. I remember having lots of discussions with my kids around breastfeeding and lots of negotiations in that last year or 2. By 3.5 you should be able to set some boundaries- such as not at night time (except when going to sleep perhaps), not while you are out and about at the park anymore- that sort of thing. I think my dd decided to stop breastfeeding because she was going to kindergarten and then preprimary school and realised it was very uncool- and ds just took her lead. Without those sort of influences, who knows when they would have stopped. Mine also enjoyed their bottles so that helped.

I just wanted to add- make sure you tell her what they are for, too (I imagine you would anyway). That way the power of suggestion is there too and she can gain some security from them- I know some kids who take drops for similar reasons to your daughter, ask for their drops and gain a lot of comfort from them. BTW I agree with the magnesium, epsom salts, lavender suggestions as well.

:iagree: And...she's 6. Its a bunk bed. In the big scheme of things...its not worth getting upset about for long (although I understand its annoying). When she's 16 and goes away for the weekend without telling you where she's gone....you can get really upset :)

I have had wonderful experiences with flower essences and have 2 complete sets of different Australian flower essences, so I guess I would have to say I think they work- as in, they have some effect :) I haven't played with the Bach ones much but have spent years with others and have great respect for them. Sometimes they are great for that sort of thing- nightmares. Worth a try. I used to call them "fairy drops" when I gave them to my kids when they were little. Sometimes I put drops in various family members' drinks :)

Not toys, but dishes and rubbish. Ds15 has decided the couch is his and his alone and he sometimes won't shift for hours. If I ask him to clean the area surrounding him of dirty plates, cups and lolly wrappers, he is known to simply push them under the couch. Well, it gets me off his back until I notice!

I feel sorry for her that she doesn't enjoy motherhood as much as she could. I feel sorry for her that her life is such that being with her kids appears to get between her and what she loves to do, and she chose her career. Many women manage to find a better way to balance both than moving so far away from their kids. But it takes all types and it isn't as extreme as the title said. I feel sorry for the 7yo but the others might well be able to cope ok. What's better- that she stay and resent it or she go and is able to be totally present when she has them? I feel sorry for her that she didn't want to even be a mum- and sorry for her kids if they ever, ever hear that- but I don't think she is evil or the worst mother out there. Plenty of mothers behave much worse yet stay physically close to their children. Plenty are abusive because they feel trapped and dont know how to meet their own needs while doing the intense job of mothering. Given healthy community and support, I think most kids could survive such a situation fairly intact. Considering the epidemic of fatherless children out there I cant see that it is much worse- especially since she was there for the first, most important years. I feel she is probably in some denial about the impact on her children and also about her own need to do what she wants...but in the big scheme of things....it doesn't upset me much. My aunt told her daughters than now they were grown up she wanted her life back and she wasnt available for babysitting or much at all. When my uncle died, she became very self centred and still is. I wonder if she could have perhaps balanced her own needs more while she had her daughters still at home, so that she wouldn't feel so much resentment and need to push them away now? I know they are hurt by her attitude and they are adults. People do what they do.

I loooooove water and how it makes me feel to bathe in it. It feels like it washes away more than dirt and grease- it washes away the night, the day, it washes away the past, whatever past that is. I love it. I will sometimes have 3 showers a day if I want to. Whether its the ocean, the spa, the pool, the hose, the bath or the shower.... I love to bathe. I always feel fresher and i love to feel fresher. I never use soap, although I do wash and condition my hair 2-3 times a week. Since I shower a lot, I just don't need soap. I also have coconut or sesame oil in my shower and sometimes will moisturise my skin with oil while I am in the shower. The water rinses off some but not all of it and the towel wipes off some too, but my skin is always moisturised and soft afterwards. I also finish every shower with the cold tap only- even in the middle of winter. THAT wakes me up! It is very good for circulation but also for snapping out of a funk! Having said that...I don't think there is any need to wash more than twice a week for hygiene, most of the time. But thats not why I do it.

I would say that people tend to be inauthentic when they could just as easily tell the truth, a lot of the time. We do tend to walk around putting a shiny face on no matter what is going on underneath and I think society would be a lot better off for some more realness. I try and tell the truth when I am asked how I am, even if its not meant to be a deep question- I purposefully take it as if the person really does care and want to know and in the moment often make an attempt to say something different to just "Im fine, thanks, how are you? ". I get very tired of that social nicety. Dh has an amazing knack for sharing with supermaket cashiers- he makes them laugh, he shares with them. Its quite possible to be more real with even strangers and often they appreciate it. It doesn't mean you dump on them or offload all your problems- you are just real. If they dont like it, thats their problem- you haven't sold out at least. Yesterday dh and I were in a music store to buy a percussion instrument for me. The guy who was helping us was a big, jolly, overweight Italian guy, very friendly and helpful. He was looking up how much discount he could give us on his computer when dh made a comment on the photograph he had above his desk of himself with a little toddler, and dh said "what a cute kid". The guy looked up and said, yes, he was the light of my life- he passed away last year. He is there looking over me. Dh and I snapped into the moment and said how sorry we were to hear about it. I felt the guy was open to talking about it- I asked him if the child was born with something- he shared that yes, he was, and gave us a long name of a genetic condition. Dh said, "we have kids too- I understand that what you've been through puts the rest of life into perspective, doesn't it?". The guy said, yes, it does. Just getting through a day is a huge thing for him. If he can get through the day and make someone else happy- its a great day. He gave us a huge discount and made us happy, and we felt honoured that he shared his real pain with us and that we could genuinely connect with him. I am so glad he shared himself with us that he told us about his pain- we didn't feel he burdened us with it- we felt we got to share in his journey and we were touched by it deeply. Dh said to him "you have really touched me by sharing your story- I just want you to know that your son has now touched my life, too.".

I just saw the trailer and I definitely want to see it. It looks very beautiful. I havent read the book.

I have one, I love it, I am glad I have it- but I use it sporadically. Usually when I use it for one thing I whip up a few things to fill it up. I tend to do things like dehydrating soaked nuts (makes them more easily digested), making raw crackers and cookies and making raw granola. I bought mine because I got into raw foods and dehydrating is a great way to make foods seem cooked, but which are still raw and retaining their full nutrition. I make raw corn chips. Yum. I have not particularly got into dehydrating fruits- it all goes when its fresh around here. I have a friend who just dehydrated a batch of tomatoes because he had so many growing in his garden- he said they turned out very well- but the rats ate my tomatoes! I suppose I should buy bulk fruit or tomatoes when I see it on special but I haven't done it yet.

Yes, I've been having one for 6-12 months although I am not feeling in crisis at the moment. It happened for me when I realised homeschooling was finishing and it was time to move on- but I didn't know what to move on to. Kind of like empty nest syndrome with the kids still living at home :) I still don't know what to move onto and am instead going to the beach every morning with dh before he starts work. The kids are getting themselves off to school/college just fine and we all leave about the same time. Yes, it is great. But I am kind of living in limbo and it would be easy to make myself very busy for the sake of it. I think mid life crisis is usually spurred on by a sense of "is this it? Is this what my life is all about? " which does sound like what you are going through. I think the challenge in it all is to find your true passions and follow them. Even if it means squeezing out 15 minutes a day for yourself at first. I think its about finding what you feel you were put here for, rather than living the life others think you should live. It's a time to re-evaluate your priorities and take care of yourself, even amongst the chaos of a busy family life. Its a time to dig inside and listen to your callings rather than just make everyone else happy.

We have satellite TV. I do often say I dont watch "normal television" because people are always mentioning shows and we just dont watch normal commercial TV and haven't for years- our satellite TV doesn't even pick them up. So I am probably one of those annoying people you are referring to :) I also watch maybe 2 hours a week. But the rest of the family watches plenty.

I am currently considering Australian Indigenous Studies and Creative Writing as a double degree. I dont know if I can justify the debt though as its not a career oriented thing. I am also interested in Anthropology, Ethnobotany, Permaculture and Sustainability. I think I need a few more lifetimes to cover it all :)

:grouphug: Yes, I have had to let go of old friends and open up to making new ones in the last few years. Homeschooling changed my life so much, my old friends couldn't really relate so much. I just trust its a healthy thing though to move on and make new friends. It is stretching me, and I am just saying to Life- ok, I am ready for new friends, please bring them to me or help me with that. And it is happening and I feel enriched and happy with it and the new people I am meeting. It is taking me out of my comfort zone, though, but I think that is good, even though it can be hard. And at the same time one of my old friends is reconnecting too as she has been through a change recently and wanted to share it with me. Although it hurts to let go of old friends...I think sometimes it is Life's way of saying, time to move on and let something new in. When you look back at your age now from say age 60, you might see that the friends you made in your mid thirties were better suited to you, and maybe some of them will be "old" friends by then too. Life never stands still.

It would just make no difference to me at all. However our mechanic is so, so generous to us. We have given him a lot of business (word of mouth) but he does our cars so cheaply and he seems like such an honest guy. We realised he was a born again type Christian and reckon he runs an ethical business because of his values- and we are glad to support him because of his honesty and his good business ethics- not particularly because he is Christian. I just mention it because he is Christian.

Since my kids are in school now...well, yes, but we can't afford it and ds got into a good public school so we are ok with how it all turned out. However for dd16- I think the pathway she is on is probably better than any private school would have given her. I went to a private school for half my schooling- it was a good education but the social side of it was so ....conservative. Dd16 would have had to pull her horns in and controlled her rather vibrant personality....I am glad she got to homeschool right through to going into our TAFE college system where she is treated as an adult. It has worked well for her. She's a free spirit. So...yes and no. We certainly didn't homeschool for purely academic reasons.

Yes! I think that is the case with mine as well! I was reading the thread...not sure if I know what they would be like if they hadn't home schooled but we did notice a huge change in ds's personality when we pulled him out of school aged7. He became sweet and innocent again- it was so noticeable, and thats why dh supported homeschooling, the difference was so huge. And we pulled dd out age 9 at the same time because we were losing her to her peers already in a big way and we could see the path she was going down- that we just weren't going to have much influence over her but her friends would. She is still very peer oriented but such a sweet and refreshing young woman. I think keeping them home and in the homeschooling world allows them to grow up more slowly and absolutely, in a less jaded way- i have noticed that about other homeschooled kids too. They are totally excited by life and optimistic and fresh. Mine both have fairly solid self esteem, too- nor do they have a hostile attitude to us as parents- we all get on pretty well.

40 weeks of school (standard in Australia) Always took summer completely off, but for us that is around 7 weeks. Holidays here are spread more evenly through the year- basically, 4 ten week terms with 2 weeks holiday between each except for the summer one. It always seemed like a good system to me so most homeschoolers I know here tend to stick to it too.

Thats the thing- it varies from school to school. If you knew the actual school you could specifically ask them...and they may not even know which ones they would use the next year. ANd maybe different teachers in the year use different texts? Not sure about that. But there are Australian maths text books. Australia uses a spiral method of teaching maths- but not as in Saxon- more, that all topics are taught each year, but each year they are taught more in depth. So geometry is taught each year etc Yes, its possible the ACT /Canberra has a different system. ANd I think schools in Australia are moving towards having years 11 and 12 more separate. But dont be misled by the word "college". We call "college" university here so when we use the word college it is often just a fancy word for highschool probably intended to make teenagers take it all more seriously or something :) I just wanted to add that I think Australia is a good place to be in the world nowadays. Apart from major flooding and fires :) things are pretty good here.

That sounds exciting! There are are few here from Victoria- Sandra and Rosie at least. They would be able to help you with the education system part. Victoria used to be the best state to homeschool in and I think it is still pretty easy. Highschool still covers years 11 and 12, they just changed the name for some schools :) Highschool here is from either years 7 to 8, through to y12. Many schools do something to separate ys 11 and 12 (at my son's school its call "senior school" and they wear white shirts instead of red) but often its still on the same campus. My son has gone from homeschool into y10 here and he is doing well. I think its actually easier here than in the U.S. My son could have gone into y11 but years 11 and 12 are the big years here and I wanted to ease him into the system before he had to perform at a high level. In Australia kids who transfer from state to state or even from school to school, have to adjust, as presently there is no common curricula. There is a new national curriculum coming in but it's not here yet. My son has done various maths programs including U.S. ones, but is surviving y10 maths- I wouldn't be too concerned about it unless he is significantly behind. Yes, the maths is different here, but if there is something they don't understand, they learn it. He would be ahead in some areas and behind in others, just like many kids who go from homeschool to highschool (most likely anyway). On the other hand I think there is a nice homeschooling community in Victoria- I am sure you will hear about it :)

I like the ideal of keeping them separate but in our reality, we needed something to be able to take away from the kids if they didn't do their chores. So, they didn't get paid to do their chores but they did get fines if they didn't do their chores. Dh instigated that because he was so frustrated all teh time when they didn't do their chores - he wanted to hit them where it hurt- money! I cant say the motivation was huge though- it didn't make much of a difference- but it made dh feel better :) I have found the best way to get chores done is to make it a routine, and to ask nicely and follow through every single day. The routine is good- but recently here when the kids went to school the routine changes and chores went out the window again. So I started asking nicely and they appreciated that- but it means I have to remember. In other words- getting kids to do chores can be harder work than doing them yourself, but patience and persistence helps.

Probably a good idea to respond from the most gracious place you can- she would have just received a shock and she was in a place to apologise and now she cant. And the truth is, there ARE always 2 sides to a story. Life has it's own way of dealing with people- we don't need to help, especially if its not our direct business.

I've been to non religious ones here (supposedly inclusive and for all homeschoolers) that seem awfully religious to me.