what do teens do in the summer

[Danestress]

especially if they have working parents?

 

I'm frustrated trying to find some summer activities for a child I am mentoring who is 14 and going into 9th grade. It seems like he is too old for all the sports camps I can find. He's a bit immature and LOVES sports. He would just love a soccer camp, but he's not an advanced player. He needs coaching.

 

He lives in a terrible neighborhood and his mother is very strict and careful with him, so she will not just let him run around with the neighborhood children. Last year, I know he was very bored. I want him to at least have something to look forward to for a week or two this summer. His parents can't drive him, so I would have to do that, but the parents would let me - they definitely would trust me to pick something for him.

 

Anyway, why is it so hard to find non-academic programming for kid this age? Surely if parents are working, 14 is still a bit young to be home alone all day all summer?

Edited April 27, 2009 by Danestress

[athena1277]

I don't know about your area, but where we are there are all kinds of day camps in the summer. What else is he interested in or would like to learn? Art? Horseback riding? A new sport?

 

I would check with your local YMCA. They have quite a few things in the summer and you don't have to be a member (although you will pay more).

[PiCO]

Our local college has sports camps for kids entering high school. My daughter will be going to one designed for girls entering 8th through 10th grade that have never played volleyball, but want to try out for their high school team.

[Danestress]

I don't know about your area, but where we are there are all kinds of day camps in the summer. What else is he interested in or would like to learn? Art? Horseback riding? A new sport?

 

I would check with your local YMCA. They have quite a few things in the summer and you don't have to be a member (although you will pay more).

 

I started with our YMCA but almost everything stops at 7th grade. I did find one "outdoor adventure" daycamp for his age, so I might ask him how he would like that.

 

Sigh. I worry so much about this boy. He's the sweetest, kindlest, most pleasant child on God's green earth and so of course he doesn't fit in with other 8th graders. Plus he stutters. Plus English is his second language. Oh, and he's Muslim, so while I am sure the YMCA would let him attend, I would have to kind of work on the parents. He loves sports but doesn't "get" the rules, and I am afraid that I will pay for a camp and then they other kids will be jerks.

[Plucky]

Do you have a decent vocational school? I know you said no academics, but often these schools offer summer classes in computer science, engineering, corrections, carpentry, car mechanics, and so much more. That's what a lot of teens do here when they aren't taking sports at the Y or working.

[Plaid Dad]

The teens I know almost all have summer jobs or are involved in things like community theater.

[myfunnybunch]

Could he find some kind of volunteer work?

 

He could volunteer at the animal shelter, at a sports camp for children, at a community garden or find some other volunteer program that matches his interests.

 

Cat

[Danestress]

The teens I know almost all have summer jobs or are involved in things like community theater.

 

When my oldest was 14, I don't recall any of his friends having real jobs (like regular, paying taxes jobs as opposed to mowing lawns or baby sitting). I wonder if it's regional? It doesn't seem like you see 14 year olds working around here, even in fast food places.

[bettyandbob]

He could volunteer or be a CIT at summer rec programs or the YMCA.

 

Our church has mission opportunities for kids this age.

 

Some places do hire at 14. A student that age needs a work permit. I've been looking at this because my ds is 14 and needs to save a lot of money--he hopes to travel overseas next year. I've been asking around. The two places known to hire this young near me are Cold Stone and the movie theater.

 

Could he start his own business--dog walking, pet care?

[Danestress]

Could he find some kind of volunteer work?

 

He could volunteer at the animal shelter, at a sports camp for children, at a community garden or find some other volunteer program that matches his interests.

 

Cat

 

He's Muslim so I am not sure he could work at an animal shelter - he can't touch dogs. Also, I think you have to be 16 at our animal shelter because I did check that once when my oldest son was younger. But maybe that's not right.

 

He might enjoy being a camp counselor. I will ask him that.

 

The thing is, he missed so much of his childhood because he grew up in a refuge camp. I really want him to get to do something that is fun and that is *for him* because he's the oldest of 7 kids so I think sometimes a lot is expected of him in terms of caring for others. He's a really really good brother and is quite close to his younger siblings, but I want him to get to spend at least a week or two with kids closer to his age. My DH wants him to get to learn the fundamentals of a sport he would like.

[Plucky]

Community theater is hot here. We have drama camps at local churches.

 

Danestress, what options does his place of worship offer? Do they have any summer programs?

[Plucky]

When my oldest was 14, I don't recall any of his friends having real jobs (like regular, paying taxes jobs as opposed to mowing lawns or baby sitting). I wonder if it's regional? It doesn't seem like you see 14 year olds working around here, even in fast food places.

 

No one hires under 16 here. But a strong teenage boy can definitely find work with neighbors.

[Jenny in Florida]

Well, my 14-year-old is planning to audition for a community theatre production. She's already auditioned for a tuition-based summer stock program.

 

She'll also be taking voice and dance lessons.

 

And she's planning to volunteer for our church's day camp.

[Danestress]

Community theater is hot here. We have drama camps at local churches.

 

Danestress, what options does his place of worship offer? Do they have any summer programs?

 

I did ask him that. I think his mother goes to the Mosque but mostly doesn't take the kids except on special holidays. They receive their religious instruction at home from their parents more than they seem to go to corporate worship. I did ask if he has any Muslim friends and he said that he doesn't.

 

 

Transportation is a real problem for them, so that may be part of it.

 

You know, I'm inclined to say that community theatre would be bad because (1) English is his second language and (2) he has a serious stuttering problem which we are working on, but which is persistent.

 

I know kids can do non-speaking roles in theatre - lights, props, costumes. I can't see him being interested in that, but maybe he would be.

[newbie]

I didnt read all posts. But what about a docent at a Museum. My niece just got a volunteer docent position in a Museum close by. She loves it.

 

Or a local state park, like a Jr Ranger.

[DarlaS]

Are you near any nature centers? My kids took part in a field school type thing at a local nature center last year. It was only 4 days each but it was something they are looking forward to doing again. Might be considered academic but it was outdoors and they had fun.

 

How about a birding group? Photography? Astronomy club? Choir? (Stutterers don't generally have a problem with singing.)

 

Does he like to build things? Maybe there is a Habitat for Humanity project nearby that could use a little help.

[Danestress]

No one hires under 16 here. But a strong teenage boy can definitely find work with neighbors.

 

so I woudn't think there would be a lot of yard work. I wonder what else he could do? I'm not sure his parents would allow it though. The are really warm and friendly but they do. not. mix. with people who use bad language or otherwise misbehave. Their neighborhood is pretty sketchy, so they keep their children very close to them.

[Perry]

He loves sports but doesn't "get" the rules, and I am afraid that I will pay for a camp and then they other kids will be jerks.

 

Has he ever tried ice skating?

 

My son also has a problem "getting" the rules. The sport that finally worked out fabulously for him is figure skating. He took a couple group lessons but then started working privately with a coach. It's one-on-one, so he doesn't have to deal with the jerks (there have been plenty in other sports), and there are no team rules to remember. So far we haven't encountered any jerky figure skaters. Our rink offers week long summer camps for all skill levels.

 

Figure skating is not cheap though.

[LBC]

My DH wants him to get to learn the fundamentals of a sport he would like.

 

My boys don't enjoy rough teen sports. We recently discovered that there's an excellent badminton club in town, and they are loving it. It's a sport that seems to attract a gentler sort of teenage boy. It's also something he would be able to enjoy at home, since it doesn't cost much to set up a net in the yard. Maybe you could find a one week summer badminton camp. He could also teach it to his younger siblings once he gets good at it.

 

Last summer my two oldest took a week of tennis lessons and really enjoyed it. That might be another good fit for him.

 

Lori

[katilac]

It's not sports, but what about zoo camp? Around here, 14 is about the age that they get to do cool, actually useful things at zoo camp.

 

For camp counseling, all of the camps here require one or two years of attending as a counselor-in-training (meaning you still pay to attend camp) beforehand.

 

Summer theatre/drama is very pricy around here, and also very cliquey. Not where I'd put an oddball kid who doesn't have a strong interest in it, kwim?

 

Would it be possible for you and dh to include him in a few fun things over the summer? Could dh coach him in the basics of a sport? Take him to the water park? Give him a few 'jobs?'

 

I know you want him to hang around kids his age, but hmmm, that's sounding tough. Could you arrange a few activities or teen versions of play dates with one or two boys whom you know would be welcoming?

 

It's a tough age!

[Kathy in MD]

......

You know, I'm inclined to say that community theatre would be bad because (1) English is his second language and (2) he has a serious stuttering problem which we are working on, but which is persistent.

 

I know kids can do non-speaking roles in theatre - lights, props, costumes. I can't see him being interested in that, but maybe he would be.

 

Did you realize James Earl Jones stutters? Still, even after years as an actor. And there's a country/western singer who stuttered when speaking, but not when singing.

 

A speaking part in the theater may be good for him. A speaking part doesn't require that he understand what others say, then think of how to respond and almost immediately put it into words. He has plenty of time to memorize his part and the parts of the other actors and work on his delivery. It might also help him with his daily English.

 

If you're still worried, you might have him memorize some poetry or essay and practice his delivery. If he can do that without stuttering, the theater might be very good for him.

[BamaTanya]

everyday for a neighbor whose mom was working. My brother mowed a lot of lawns. My friend (who was aiming for a medical career) volunteered in a university hospital.

 

Of my dc's friends: one works with Make-A-Wish and a few volunteer at a camp for children with disabilities.

[Amy in TX]

Oh, and he's Muslim, so while I am sure the YMCA would let him attend, I would have to kind of work on the parents.

 

I'm Muslim, and we have a family membership at the YMCA. Do you know what objections they have?

 

Amy

:)

[Plucky]

I did ask him that. I think his mother goes to the Mosque but mostly doesn't take the kids except on special holidays. They receive their religious instruction at home from their parents more than they seem to go to corporate worship. I did ask if he has any Muslim friends and he said that he doesn't.

 

 

Transportation is a real problem for them, so that may be part of it.

 

You know, I'm inclined to say that community theatre would be bad because (1) English is his second language and (2) he has a serious stuttering problem which we are working on, but which is persistent.

 

I know kids can do non-speaking roles in theatre - lights, props, costumes. I can't see him being interested in that, but maybe he would be.

 

I may not be understanding the culture or the area and this may step on the parents toes, but it sounds like he needs to find friends that are of his background and/or religion. You may not be able to do this, but he should try a Muslim youth group/club.

[Danestress]

I'm Muslim, and we have a family membership at the YMCA. Do you know what objections they have?

 

Amy

:)

 

I doubt they have any. I do think one of their sons play on a Y soccer league.

 

I just want to be sensitive to how they might feel. They are refugees so they are still trying to get used to how things work here (though it's been four years) and to the language. The YMCA's in my town are open to everyone of every faith and are inviting, but they are also unapologetically Christian. I've never been in Ys with as much "message" as the one's here have. So I just want to be sensitive to how it would feel for these parents. But I think it would be okay.

 

 

I did find one Y with a week of basketball camp that allows kids his age, so I might just call the reference number and talk to someone about whether it would be suitable.

 

There is also a week long basketball camp at the Jewish Community Center, so maybe that would work.

 

There is also an Islamic School in town, so I wonder if the Mom has asked people there for ideas. I might ask her.

[AndyJoy]

Does he swim? What about swimming laps at the pool? Or if he doesn't, swimming lessons--my pool offers swimming lessons for beginners of all ages.

[Danestress]

Does he swim? What about swimming laps at the pool? Or if he doesn't, swimming lessons--my pool offers swimming lessons for beginners of all ages.

 

and I am planning to take him to our pool some this summer. I have doubts about how good of swimmer he is, since he has asked me twice how deep the water at our pool is. If it turns out that he can't really swim, I am probably going to get him swimming lessons and will try to find out how his siblings could also get free swimming lessons because I am fanatical on the topic. I want all of them to swim *well.* So we will see.

[Danestress]

I will have to tell him that and maybe rent some JEJ movies to watch together! Thaks for the info!

[Kate in Arabia]

He's Muslim so I am not sure he could work at an animal shelter - he can't touch dogs.

Just as an aside, I know many Muslims are super-sensitive about the "dog issue", but many others aren't. It isn't a "rule" that you can't touch dogs, many Muslim cultures have dogs, including the one where I'm living (Salukis http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saluki )

 

I do think it's a good idea in this particular case to avoid it, unless the boy himself has shown some interest.

 

I don't know where you are located, some mosques have summer camps and the like; the local Islamic school may have some ideas or even some programs. Any museums nearby with summer classes? Local park district? Even other homeschoolers in the area, do you have a support group there that might include him in summer activities?

[NCMom]

When my oldest was 14, I don't recall any of his friends having real jobs (like regular, paying taxes jobs as opposed to mowing lawns or baby sitting). I wonder if it's regional? It doesn't seem like you see 14 year olds working around here, even in fast food places.

 

It is regional, lol. There are buckets of jobs there and few here for kids, plus everyone works up there from the minute they can. My ds had paying jobs in NH from the time he was 11...sometimes he was paid in eggs or maple syrup, but still. ;)

 

I have the same problem with my nephew who comes from NH for the summer. He is only 12.5 but each year there are less and less options. Sports up there are not as advanced and although he is considered a good soccer player there he is barely past newbie here. :001_huh: Also has maturity problems, so I get where you are coming from there too. Volunteering and stuff like that is out until a LOT of maturing occurs...

 

So far I can still have him do swim, golf and tennis lessons though. Our swim team does a summer only group too, but he doesn't swim well enough for that.

 

But you may be out of luck for sports camps. In out area, only the MLS soccer camps seem to have the less competitive groupings for that age and I don't think they come to Charlotte. And as I have learned, do NOT put him in one that says Sr or Jr Advanced or whatever without checking it out with the coaches first, good golly some of those groups are really advanced!

 

Also, mine do a lot of nature stuff together. We go to parks to see demonstrations and hear talks, etc. I try to get them all hiking at least once a week. There are usually free concerts and other stuff around too.

 

hth,

Georgia

[Janet in Toronto]

I have a 14 yo son and am in a bit of a similar situation.

 

He will do two weeks at a "cyberArts" camp, one week doing graphic design and one week doing 3D animation. He will also take a First Aid course and a babysitting course as my brother is moving to town with three small children. He is going to look into being a Counsellor-in-Training at some local daycamps...the first one I looked at charges $1500 for 4 weeks, so that was a no-go. Another required you be have finished Grade 9 so he's not eligible this year. I"m sure there are some others though.

 

There is a local golf course that hires 14 year olds but by the time he contacted them, they were fully staffed for the summer. I think the boys collect balls, caddy, tidy up etc. I wasn't so keen on that because this son is very fair-skinned and I didn't want him outside all day every day, even with sunscreen and a hat.

 

So we're still trying to figure things out. I am planning to employ him for a week or so to scan all my books into my library database.

 

Janet

[Danestress]

. He will also take a First Aid course and a babysitting course as my brother is moving to town with three small children.

 

 

I am going to look into a Red Cross first aid class for him and me to take together. It wouldn't hurt either of us, and I think it would be good for someone in his household to have life saving training! He's the oldest of seven, so that wouldn't hurt. Thanks for the idea!

[Danestress]

I didn't mean to imply that all Muslims feel this way, but the boys parents don't want their children touching dogs, and so of course I would honor that. He always tells me, "Don't worry Miss Dana. Homer (my dog) and I are friends, but I just don't touch him." lol. I was wondering about that, though. Do some Muslims, then, use dogs for sheep herding or guarding livestock?

 

I have thought about calling the Islamic Center here in town to ask about summer programs. There's actually an Islamic school but they don't have any summer programs on their website.

 

I always feel a bit strange making inquiries for this child since I don't have an "official" relationship with him. I feel this way calling the YMCA or his teachers, and especially would feel odd calling the parents own place of worship. But his parents speak poor English, and they have absolutely no financial means, so his mother isn't likely to make that call. She wouldn't want to feel like she was finding things to do for him, knowing that I would have to pay and provide transportation, even if I tell her I want to. It's probably better for me to just find the opportunities and then ask her what she thinks of them and whether she would allow him to participate.

 

And I know I make it sound like it's just the mother. He actually has a really great Dad, but his father's English is very very minimal and I tend to mostly work with the Mom because she's the one who is home.

 

Also, can I ask one more question about the Islamic thing. Do you happen to know, in smaller city like ours with limited resources for Muslims, do Muslims from different cultures and with different cultural and even religious beliefs tend to get along well and interact well? This family is from Africa. I noticed that there weren't any black faces on the website so I am thinking that maybe there aren't a lot of African immigrant Muslim families here in town (though I know there are a number). Would there be much of the, "well, you aren't dressed like us" or "you aren't the same kind of Muslim" type attitudes that you sometimes get between Christian denominations? Just wondering. I have a very motherly feeling for this child - I want his paths to always be smooth, you know?

[Danestress]

thank you thank you thank you. You guys are, as always, so helpful and thoughtful and generally great!

 

I am going to call his parents this week and talk to them about basketball camp (I found one Y program in our area that will take a boy this age), swimming lessons, and working at a soccer camp for younger kids as an "assistant."

 

I still have a few other possibilities to explore, including calling the Islamic Center, but already I feel like he's going to have a much better summer and I can't wait to talk to him about it after I clear things with his parents!

[Kate in Arabia]

I was wondering about that, though. Do some Muslims, then, use dogs for sheep herding or guarding livestock?

There's a wide range. I know a lot of Muslims who have dogs; some have dogs for a purpose (like guard dogs, hunting, etc.) and some just like dogs. As you probably already know, it's a ritual cleanliness issue, so if you like dogs there are ways to do it and still adhere to a strict interpretation; and there are many Muslims who follow things to a different extent (I don't think I can count the number of Muslims I know who drink alcohol, for example, and I think that's more clearly outlined in Islamic scripture than the dog thing), and some may just have a different interpretation/understanding of the whole thing (like with the hijab issue, some feel it's a literal "you must cover from head to toe" and some feel it's "you should dress with some modesty").

 

Do you happen to know, in smaller city like ours with limited resources for Muslims, do Muslims from different cultures and with different cultural and even religious beliefs tend to get along well and interact well?

Yes. In general, the smaller the community the more integrated and "tight" the families are. When I first converted our local Muslim community was fairly small, we had families from all over -- like one or two from Pakistan, one or two from Somalia, etc. -- and we were all really close. The larger the community, the more likely they will split into different ethnic or sectarian groups, in my experience. I lived in Chicago for nine years, and it's a lot less integrated.

[elegantlion]

One of the private schools here had a "camp fair" recently. There were some national organization, I'll have to check my info and give you some websites, after the coffee kicks in.

 

I understand about the transportation. That's been an issue for us in the past.

 

If you have a local college/university you might check to see if they have summer programs specifically for kids in high school and under. I was surprised that ours had quite a few choices.