Ettiquete for Dr.'s call-backs?

[CalicoKat]

so I'm standing in the mall at 9:30 pm with dh Christmas shopping and I get a call from my gyn. dr. telling me I've got another abnormal pap and he wants to schedule me for a procedure. . . .

 

(TMI following)

 

History:

-Not the first time for such a thing. Last time was 5 years ago. Also doing procedures on me is complicated because I have other medications that I have to wean off/on.

 

-Yes it's upsetting. And then when I proceed to confirm that it will mean a week of medication adjustment he swore, "sh$%&t."

 

- EVERY time I see this guy he's pushing procedures on me. He really wants me to do this thing where they cauterize the uterus--it's got a special name, don't know--and simultaneously he wants to do a chemical peel on the cervix. He wants to look at things with the microscope and then, "just a small biopsy .... ," and "oooh, let's also scrap some uterine lining cells." I hate pain. I loathe pain down there. I am really not into pain. I freak out with pain. Don't reach up my a@@ and start scraping whatever unless there is pain medication or you might find your head in an involuntarily vice grip knee lock.

 

-I don't like this man. I pretty much can't stand him. But his partner quit shortly after my surgery last winter and because he was part of that issue/resolution I thought I shouldn't jump ship until it was resolved.

 

- His bedside manner is horrendous, "You didn't get back here when I said so now you probably have cancer and it's all your fault . . . " That's how he greeted me for an appointment before I switched to his partner (lady) FWIW. . . I DID follow his directions on timing and he just had to consult my file to see that I had. No apology of course.

 

- I thought my last appointment with him was a followup for surgery. And when they had me change twice because it was a complete exam he then FORGOT to do the bre**t exam! I didn't think of it till after I was half way home.

 

- This is also the man who told me 17 years ago, "just relax, you'll be pregnant within 3 months. I promise." HAH! Not that it matters now, but he's cock sure of himself.

 

sooo . . . he's going to be out of town for the week. Can I "jump ships" on this medical event and get another dr?

 

The thing is that he calls me and blocks his number so I just can't screen his calls and not answer.

 

I've found a gynecological oncologist locally. Supposedly it's pre-cancerous cells or dysplasia or just inflamation. My hormones still aren't regulated right after surgery so I'm not surprised everything is wacked out. But this doctor sounds like he knows more. I'm thinking he'll have more experience and give better advice and direction. I'm not against procedures when they're truly necesary. I hate thinking I'm just paying for someone's vacation.

 

Seriously for parts of my body that haven't worked normally I'm spending giving them an awful lot of time and attention. Sheesh.

 

OK, back to Christmas.

[Elisabeth in IL]

I'd find another doctor. I don't think you need to worry about ettiquete. You are a paying customer not a friend. Find someone with whom you are comfortable!!!!

[Happy]

If you don't like his 'customer service' find another doctor. Make it more interesting (after you've found a doctor you like) and write a business formal letter to the him, detailing all the things reasons you left his practice.

 

Personally, I think it is high time for some doctors to realize we are consumers as well as patients. We left a general practictioners office because of the way the office, billing, and scheduling were being done. My hairdresser was doing a better job of taking care of me than that office. ;) Over booked appointments, bills sent directly to me (not insurance) a YEAR after the event....there's more, but you get the idea.

[klmama]

Jump ship now!!!! Life is too short to have someone like that as your current doctor, particularly for stressful problems like this one. Go to the new one you described and never look back! If the treatment for this drags out, needing multiple visits, would you really want to have to see this annoying doc again and again, with his rude comments and lack of bedside manner? Treat yourself the way you deserve and get a new doctor! Dsyplasia isn't something to mess with, and seeing a gynecological oncologist will mean you are seeing someone who really knows what he/she is doing. Call for an appointment now!!!!

[Jackie in AR]

The thing is that he calls me and blocks his number so I just can't screen his calls and not answer.

 

First of all, I don't answer the phone for callers who block their numbers. Period. If they want to talk with me, they can reveal their identity. Or leave a message. :D

 

Secondly, there is no way on God's green earth that man would get another dime of my money, or another second of my time. No way, no how. I would get my medical records transferred somewhere else, ASAP.

[Parrothead]

I agree with everyone else. It is time to find a new doctor. A new patient appointment may require a wait to get in so call very soon.

[Oak Knoll Mom]

Find someone else! Honestly, I can't believe you've stayed with him this long.:D

[girligirlmom]

Run away, run far away. It's not just the bad attitude and curse words, although I changed dentists (but stayed in the same practice) from one that is just full of himself. If the other two dentist (ladies) left, I would not say with him. The office staff is nice, the assistants are nice, it's just this one guy and I won't see him.

 

The thing that would make me change in your case is when you say

- EVERY time I see this guy he's pushing procedures on me.

 

It's billable time and he's finding a way to bill you. I would get a second opinion on any surgery. Your health is too important. I get a sense that he is going to keep finding things to do as long as you keep paying him.

[stripe]

Oh my. Sounds awful. I think the gynecologist is the most important doctor to have a good bedside manner with, no pun intended. It's such an uncomfortable/awkward thing to whip off your pants, you really should have someone with class.

 

Get a copy of your records and find someone new.

[phathui5]

Can you find another doctor? I can't imagine going to the guy you describe.

[melissel]

sooo . . . he's going to be out of town for the week. Can I "jump ships" on this medical event and get another dr?

 

Good grief. Yes, please do, and if you can manage it, do it 17 years ago, OK?

 

You've put up with waaaaaaaay more than I will in a care provider. If I even think a provider's too pompous, I'll change. No way will I put up with someone I don't completely like or trust poking around "down there."

 

:grouphug: I'm sorry you're going through all this. Definitely get someone better to help you on this path. And flip that guy off when you're on way out the door!

[Murphy101]

should have jumped ship a long time ago it sounds like

if he calls again, just say that you are looking into other care options

[Tree House Academy]

FInd another doctor. I did. I recently had some issues and I went to a dr who did tests and immediately wanted to jump to surgery to remove something that "may or may not be" a problem. I didn't feel comfortable and I jumped ship. I went to another dr who made sense and took me and my feelings into account. Then, he left his practice and I found another doctor who is just the BEST to ever grace the planet. :) Keep searching. Having an abnormal Pap 5 years ago and then one just now does not mean you have to have surgery immediatey (unless there is something I am missing in your history).

 

I had an abnormal pap 10 years ago (was tested 4 weeks after having my son which was just STUPID on their part, but I didn't know any better). My doc at the time was into the whole "Let's do all we can while you have good insurance that PAYS (free, State insurance)" and I am convinced to this day that it was fraud. He did the same to 3 other people I know right after they had babies! Anyway, I knew no better and I had a colposcopy (biopsy) and Cryosurgery. I am no worse for the wear, but it was a terrifying experience as far as telling a new mom at the age of 19 that she has "pre-cancer" cells. After having talked with other ob/gyns in the last 10 years (I have seen probably 10 different ones thanks to moves and such), I now know that protocol would have been to wait and see if the next pap was abnormal in 3 months. Sometimes it is hormonal, sometimes just a fluke, sometimes it even resolves itself.

 

Also, DO NOT let a dr push you into having surgery. Unless you have major who-ha issues, there is no reason to go freezing your uterus or scraping cells and the like. If you are having abnormal bleeding, abnormal pain, etc, then sure...do the tests and make sure you are okay...but don't jump straight to surgery. Sounds like this man is out for $$$ no matter what the expense to you physically and emotionally.

 

In short...FIND ANOTHER GYN!

[CalicoKat]

Find someone else! Honestly, I can't believe you've stayed with him this long.:D

I stayed with this group of practicing gyn's for 17 years but I stopped seeing him loong ago until last January when right after my gyn related surgery the partner I was seeing quit the practice. Because I was still post-op and all the follow-up required I felt I had to stick with him as he was the one they handed my file to. I've seen him twice since surgery and I'm moving on thanks to all the advice here and also because my "who-ha"

needs a better doctor. I do think he's trying to drum up funds for his vacations. . . which I remember have been numerous.

[melissel]

I stayed with this group of practicing gyn's for 17 years but I stopped seeing him loong ago until last January when right after my gyn related surgery the partner I was seeing quit the practice. Because I was still post-op and all the follow-up required I felt I had to stick with him as he was the one they handed my file to. I've seen him twice since surgery and I'm moving on thanks to all the advice here and also because my "who-ha"

needs a better doctor. I do think he's trying to drum up funds for his vacations. . . which I remember have been numerous.

 

That does make sense. I really don't think you have to feel any guilt or concern about leaving him, at all. Your who-ha deserves the very best doctor you can find for it :D

[sands31210]

I would change doctors; but first, get copies of your records.

[Harriet Vane]

Yes. Please get another doctor. The one you described sounds like a nightmare. Reading your post makes me want to go give him a piece of my mind.

[Paz]

Wow! This sound so much like my doctor. I asked friends and found the most wonderful doctor. It was definately worth it.

[Holly IN]

I would run as fast as you can away from this guy!!

 

Get some recommendations from your friends as a start and follow through on that.

 

Holly

[CalicoKat]

she was very kind and non-alarmist.

 

Evidently the results my previous gyn gave me from the last test were hyped up. There was no HPV, No dysplasia, NO precancerous cells. She had the original report in my transferred files.

 

She's like, "no big deal."

 

Also she wondered why they'd removed both my ovaries last year. She's conservative and said that the risk of being on hormones for the rest of my life are more of a risk than the risk of possibility developing another large cyst. I know she's 2nd guessing but I do feel that my last gyn loved to "cut."

 

Anyway, starting the new year with a new doctor I wish the previous one would stop calling. He keeps calling, I'm screening out his calls so I don't have to answer, but it's annoying.

[LizzyBee]

I'm glad you found a doctor you like.

[Liz CA]

Why does he keep calling? Strange!

 

Sounds like he has still some medical school loans to pay or does he have an expensive hobby and needs to get more people to pay for it?

 

Uuuggghh! So glad you got out. I have no patience for doctors like that. In fact the part where he told you "you probably have cancer now ..." I'd even think about contacting the AMA or someone local regarding this. Horrendous!

[LaxMom]

Yay! Excellent that you found a new doctor and scraped the old one off like gum on your shoe (and there does appear to be some residue). And excellent that she is not freaking out over your PAP results!

 

Also she wondered why they'd removed both my ovaries last year. She's conservative and said that the risk of being on hormones for the rest of my life are more of a risk than the risk of possibility developing another large cyst. I know she's 2nd guessing but I do feel that my last gyn loved to "cut."

 

Anyway, starting the new year with a new doctor I wish the previous one would stop calling. He keeps calling, I'm screening out his calls so I don't have to answer, but it's annoying.

 

I find it sort of... I don't know... strange? Certainly surprising! Doctors, particularly OB/GYNs are not normally willing to second guess aloud to patients. I think it stems from them being sued fairly regularly.

 

I wonder if that's why the old doctor keeps calling; she called him to find out what he was thinking and he thinks he's about to be sued. :001_huh:

[stripe]

I am so glad to hear you have a new doctor.

[CalicoKat]

Yay! Excellent that you found a new doctor and scraped the old one off like gum on your shoe (and there does appear to be some residue). And excellent that she is not freaking out over your PAP results!

 

 

 

I find it sort of... I don't know... strange? Certainly surprising! Doctors, particularly OB/GYNs are not normally willing to second guess aloud to patients. I think it stems from them being sued fairly regularly.

 

I wonder if that's why the old doctor keeps calling; she called him to find out what he was thinking and he thinks he's about to be sued. :001_huh:

They wanted to know why I was switching mid-stream with this doc. especially since it was noted in the copy of my records that I was going to be scheduled for a ton of procedures. She wanted to know what I knew about my results before she told me what actually the results were.

 

Found out too from the chatty nurse that all the female gyn's in my other doctor's practice retire, quit, or moved on to anther practice in the last 9 months. She didn't offer a reason why, just stated the fact.

 

The new doc also stated that she's conservative, unlike my previous doc.

 

AND my fav. she's calling my cardio doc. and my internist to make chat with them about my meds and to let them know she's new to the team caring for me. :001_smile:

 

Since she's a referral from my cardiologist I'm waaay cool with that. I call my cardio all the time when I've got something new going on. He needs to know. I called him the minute they slapped me in the hosp. last winter because they weren't paying attention to my heart meds carefully enough. Plus I have a 10 yrs relationship with him so I know he's going to

give it to me straight. My internist is going to be like, "whatever. . . .

 

the other doc tried calling again today. He's the only one who does the *67 thingy (that I know of) and so his calls always come up "restricted." I just don't answer. He doesn't leave mssgs. He should get the picture though when I don't come in for my yearly refill of on my hormone prescription. Got a new one from the new doc. :)

[stripe]

Call his office and inform whoever (him or recpetionist or something) -- or write a letter -- saying that you're seeing another doctor and please contact you in writing if there is any outstanding business. If he's calling you this often, I think you deserve a break.