The "I sent my kids to preschool" reflection post

[Meadowlark]

So, I was on here last year and started a huge thread about whether or not I should send my 2 little people to preschool. I debated and agonized over the decision, but ultimately signed both of them up. My son was in the 4 year old program and went 5 days a week 8:15-11:15, and my daughter, 3, went MWF during the same time. They went to a highly regarded preschool at our (large) Catholic church. Here is my reflection in case anyone else has ever thought of the idea or is up in the air as I was.

 

The Positives:

-My house was quieter from 8:30-11:00! I did still have the 2 year old tornado, but overall it was significantly less quiet during that time.

 

-My 7 year old grew leaps and bounds in reading-probably because I was able to put the 2 year old with the 9 year old, and give him 100% of my attention. He finished AAR 2, and did all of 3 and 4!

 

-My preschoolers really did like it. They had great teachers, made a few friends, and brought home little pieces of artwork that they were so proud of.

 

-We got to go to cute Christmas and Spring programs! It really is sweet to watch your kids march in with their friends and proudly perform the songs they had been working on. Songs that I didn't teach them!

 

-They learned their letters, how to write their names, and heard TONS of stories.

 

-They did art. Nope, no art was happening here.

 

-They went to mass every week and learned quite a bit about the faith.

 

-A big portfolio. They made each of my kids a HUGE portfolio filled with pictures and artwork. It is a beautiful keepsake of the year-a huge wow.

 

The Negatives:

-the DRIVING. Holy cow, the biggest hurdle. Our mornings were rushed, breakfast was quick quick quick, everybody in the van. I actually had to care about what I looked like as I was dropping my kids off next to the doctors and lawyers who were on their way to work. Mostly though, it was yoga pants and frizzy hair admittedly. Then every day at 11:00, it was drop what we were doing to get everyone in the van. Because if you were even a minute late, you had to wait until everyone else left before you could go into the lot to pick up your kid. No matter what we were doing, we obviously had to stop to be there on time. 

 

-We had a rigid homeschool because of the time crunch. We became very much box checkers-only doing what we had to do to get it done. There were no rabbit trails, no leisurely discussions...nothing. We got done what we needed to, nothing more nothing less. It was...boring and totally uncreative.

 

-I felt like we were not on the same page. Everyone was doing something different. Maybe this was good for them to have their own thing, but we always felt disjointed. 

 

-Seemed like the kids argued and didn't get along very well this year. Maybe that would've happened anyway, but at least if you're together all the time you have the opportunity to problem solve and solve conflicts. There seemed to be a lot of arguing, bickering and overall unhappiness.

 

-I had a hard time being the "school mom". Sharing for A on Monday, sharing for L on Wednesday. Library for A on Monday, Library for L and Friday. Pajama day, crazy hat day, wear your shirt backwards day...what? I can barely get my kids there people let along remember all of this!

 

-Library visits. More books to keep track of and mix up with our other library books. Grrreat.

 

-My kids hands got so dried out from washing his hands 6x/ a day. I sent cream but it had to be classified as medicine and my son said he never got it which resulted in red, cracked hands for 9 months.

 

-24 kids in my daughter's 3 year old class. 3 adults, yes, but the noise level was crazy.

 

-I had to actually DO my daughter's almost butt-length long hair. And do it in a hurry. Not good.

 

-A lot of...worksheets. I'm sorry, but I could give them worksheets at home. A lot of creativity too, but still..worksheets?

 

OVERALL:

Maybe it was what we needed at that point of life and I'm trying hard not to feel any regret. Sometimes though, I feel like I gave away a precious year of my children's life, although again, it was what we needed then. I am NOT sending anybody next year. We are all going to be home. Sleeping in if we want, making pancakes, gathering on the carpet learning TOGETHER. I have very different goals for this next year, and I am very excited.

 

If you're trying to make this decision as I was, know that there are pros and cons. No situation is ever going to be perfect. My kids did learn, they were not corrupted, they didn't learn any nasty words or turn into bullies, etc. Most importantly, they had fun and thought it was great. So move on we will-but my babies are coming home.

 

 

[Monica_in_Switzerland]

I love reading your honest feelings on this.  

 

There is something to be said for the big, happy, loud, crazy family-schooling.  :-)

[Bonkers247]

We sent our younger two to preschool this year. I agree with everything in your post. We needed to do it, but no one is going back next year. I felt like the cons outweighed the pros for us.

[Hobbes]

I love seeing the btdt feedback - thank you for sharing!

[Rachel]

Thanks for sharing. It's helpful reading both the pros and the cons.

[SKL]

Great post.  :)

[happypamama]

I appreciate reading both the pros and cons!  

[Hilltopmom]

I "almost" signed the 3 yr old up for T/Th preschool, since the teen is DEing those mornings anyways & we'll already be in town. But I didn't.

Gonna just drop in library story time & childrens museum a few times a month plus run errands those AMs instead- save some $ on preschool.

I'm toying with sending her to ps for K (I can't even believe it myself, but I'm getting burnt out on homeschooling), & if they go to ps, I want them home for all their preschool years:)

[mellifera33]

Both times a younger sibling has hit 3 and become mr/miss whinypants, I have been tempted to send him/her to preschool. It has been your "con" list that has held me back. If I had more than 3 kids, though, it would probably be a necessity to keep me organized enough to homeschool the olders.

[boscopup]

A lot of your list sounds like what happened when I sent my oldest to K-1 at private school... The mad dash to get everyone out the door in the morning and pick up in the afternoon (and afternoon pickup was in the middle of baby/toddler nap time), the various dressup days (really, what's up with that?!? There is always some special day to dress up for, and we didn't do that when I was a kid), the parties you're expected to support even if you think they're stupid (ahem... I'm looking at you, Kindergarten graduation), the siblings not getting along when everyone comes back home, and in my case... I was sending my helper away, so I was left with two younger children that were into everything!

 

Thanks for this reminder, as I have a toddler this year, and I'm sure preschool would be tempting at some point. We'll manage with her here. If she'd get over her screeching phase, that might help. :tongue_smilie: None of my kids has been to preschool, not even my oldest (my husband thought it was a waste of money), so I'm not AS tempted as some. :)

 

[MotherGoose]

I will most likely be sending my baby to preschool when he's old enough. By then, the older kids will be old enough to be left alone to do work while I go to pickup--12 and 9 ish. It sounds like they had a great time, and it allowed you to get some things done with the other kids. But I too am bad at being a school mom.

[tm919]

The hair thing... it's real. I have learned to speed french braid... I once didn't think that was possible for me, but if I don't braid my daughters' hair, after 3 hours they look like they've never met a comb.

 

Slightly off topic: Has anyone who did this had their kids make lasting friendships through preschool/K? My daughters have some GREAT friends they made in preschool/K who are homeschooled (starting in 1rst) and I have to say... I feel like our public school-driven schedule is completely at odds with their schedules. I am trying to keep those friendships going but it doesn't seem easy, schedule-wise.

Edited June 18, 2016 by tm919

[theelfqueen]

My 11 year old is still friends with his bf from preschool. They've never been in school together or anything like that again. But it has taken an effort to get them together.

[MotherGoose]

My Dd are friends still with kids from preschool. It has taken definite effort from me to make it happen. I have learned that most people have the same insecurities I do about inviting people over -will they come, is my house a mess, will they have fun, will they like me/us, will they destroy my house, and so I just invite people over. Even if they don't get past their own anxieties to ever invite me to their house, if they seem to like my kids and I, I continue to invite them back. It's strange --I never intended to be the social planner, but somehow I am.

[MerryAtHope]

btdt! I debated, agonized, and finally sent my oldest to preschool. After the year was done, I thought...I could have homeschooled preschool! Brought him home and homeschooled all the way through! Ours was a good preschool but I still felt the cons outweighed the pros and found many of the same things you did (the running around, relationship issues etc...)

[Janeway]

Here is where I am....

 

I picked a preschool known for hands on. It is rare that I see anything come home in the form of a worksheet. I love the preschool. I honestly LOVE LOVE LOVE the preschool. We get a lot done when they are there. And really, my children have learned so much and done so well there.

 

Downside..in the last 4 years of sending children to preschool, I have spent $12,000!!!!!!!! I could have invested that money and had a year of college tuition fully paid for at the state university. And the children only ever went two half days a week, school year only.

 

That is the only downside here. I am so frustrated. One more year of preschool for Princess Glitter and then I have Baby Beautiful. What to do...what to do....

 

(if you comment to my post, please click "like" so I know to come back and look. Thanks!)

[Hilltopmom]

Our fun YMCA preschool is all play based, I love it there, my big kids went. But yeah, the price & the drive....

[OnMyOwn]

My kids loved preschool, but it was play-based and it was only 2 or 3 mornings a week depending on the year. Since I only have two and they were both in preschool all but one year, it was a great break for me. My kids loved it. It was so wonderful for them, I even signed my son up for the after-k program his kindergarten year, which also worked out well. The drive was a bit of a hassle, because the program was only 2 or 2 1/2 hours long.

[wintermom]

Thanks for sharing. I went through a month of the driving, being held to a strict schedule, etc. when I sent my oldest to 4-year old K. After the month is when I started homeschooling. We've been homeschooling ever since, though I did debate in my mind for a few minutes about sending the youngest to K. I didn't, as all the cons made it not worth it. For the few hours over a few months you think your life is easier, it really isn't. And our K is free. I would never in a million years pay for pre-school. In addition to the tuition, add in price of gas and car, as well as the value of your time. Think of all the amazing toys you could invest in for a "play-based environment" at home for all your children and friends.