athomeontheprairie Posted September 11, 2015 Share Posted September 11, 2015 My bil's wife is 9 months pregnant with the first baby (yay!). normally this time of year we go to their house and spend 3 days going to the state fair. I'm glad. It's good. We see them off and on during our stay, but they do their own thing and join us when they like (she doesn't like certain exhibits, and my family does a lot of the kids activities). It's good, for both of us. Really. This year, I told her two months ago of she didn't want us to come down, that's absolutely gone. And it is! I don't to stress her, I don't want to contaminate her house with kids gems right before her baby (first baby, remember?) :-) I a want her to take care of her and not feel like she needs to entertain us. Well, two months ago, she said she really want up to having kids over. I get it, really I do. I'm a package deal. I come with 4 kids. So this yet we aren't going. Except, now pictures are going up. She's at the fair with 3 kids (her nieces. But they live in that town-and so aren't at her house). My il's are going down (3 adults and a high schooler). My dh goes with his job. And we won't be going. I can't do the fair in one day (too much driving, walking, etc) there's no hotels available (everything is booked up for to the fair, for 60 miles in all directions). I don't want to camp with 4 kids (btdt, too much work with little ones). I'm so glad she said no. I'm glad I gave her "permission" (she doesn't like to say no to anyone). I'm glad she is taking care of herself and this baby. Really I am. But this is the first time in 12 years we won't have been at the fair, and I'm sad. And since it seems we are the only ones not going (because I have kids) it makes me sad. Everyone here is disappointed. Just needed a place to vent. Just an I understand, but it's the right decision and yes it's hard. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted September 11, 2015 Share Posted September 11, 2015 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: I'm sorry you're sad. :( I would be sad, too. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AimeeM Posted September 11, 2015 Share Posted September 11, 2015 I would be sad, too :( I would understand, and yes it's the right decision, but it IS still hard. Vent away. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlsdMama Posted September 11, 2015 Share Posted September 11, 2015 I'm so glad she said no. I'm glad I gave her "permission" (she doesn't like to say no to anyone). I'm glad she is taking care of herself and this baby. Really I am. But this is the first time in 12 years we won't have been at the fair, and I'm sad. And since it seems we are the only ones not going (because I have kids) it makes me sad. Everyone here is disappointed. Just needed a place to vent. Just an I understand, but it's the right decision and yes it's hard. I'm glad she said no. I'm glad you gave her permission. I'm sorry that you're sad. I understand. (((((((Hugs))))) It was absolutely the best decision and it's still okay that it's hard and bittersweet. Next year, right?! 11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted September 11, 2015 Share Posted September 11, 2015 :grouphug: I'm sorry you're sad. For us it will be a down-and-back trip tomorrow. It does make for a very long, exhausting day to do it that way. Maybe you could stay somewhere a bit farther away and still go? 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted September 11, 2015 Share Posted September 11, 2015 :grouphug: I'm sorry you're sad. For us it will be a down-and-back trip tomorrow. It does make for a very long, exhausting day to do it that way. Maybe you could stay somewhere a bit farther away and still go? Staying further out is a good idea! Op, I hope you can still manage to go. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mama Geek Posted September 11, 2015 Share Posted September 11, 2015 If you can't work that out staying further away, is there somewhere else you and your kids might light to go for a day or 2? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
athomeontheprairie Posted September 11, 2015 Author Share Posted September 11, 2015 Staying further out isn't a bad idea. But further out really means halfway home. And if I'm already halfway home... By the time I check into a hotel, gather luggage and get kids settled I could be (almost) home. And yup, there are other things to do. Fun times ahead in October... But we still will miss the fair. We like it :-) It's good. But I'm still sad we're missing out! Thanks for listening hive, I needed to tell someone and absolutely do not want her to hear least she feel guilty. I love her and my bil. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarinesWife Posted September 11, 2015 Share Posted September 11, 2015 Where is your husband staying? I'm sorry you're missing it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
athomeontheprairie Posted September 11, 2015 Author Share Posted September 11, 2015 Where is your husband staying? I'm sorry you're missing it. His company puts him up. But is two single beds for him and the other recruiter. No way could we fit 5 more people in that room :-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted September 12, 2015 Share Posted September 12, 2015 :grouphug: :grouphug: It's ok and normal to feel sad and disappointed, even when you are the one who made the decision. Maybe you can put the money you're saving toward something extra special for your planned October fun. Splurge on an upgrade of some sort. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Tick Posted September 12, 2015 Share Posted September 12, 2015 I think she is being rude. Sure, I'm not on Facebook and I had some wine with dinner, but still. In any case I'm sorry you are sad and I think you did the right thing giving her an out. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mamiof5 Posted September 12, 2015 Share Posted September 12, 2015 You are very loving and understanding. Sorry you are a little sad. Maybe you can do something special with the kids? I know it won't replace it, but might distract you from thinking about it. And hopefully you can go next year :) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kerileanne99 Posted September 12, 2015 Share Posted September 12, 2015 Just an out-there idea: When we wanted to visit friends during a sold-out weekend at local hotels we were able to rent an RV for a very reasonable price. Since we weren't driving it far we didn't have to worry much about petrol, and we simply parked it at friend's house...it gave all of us space:) Would something like this be an option? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RootAnn Posted September 12, 2015 Share Posted September 12, 2015 :grouphug: Look at it that next year, you will all be really, really excited about the fair since you didn't get to go this year. Make sure you take a little time to sit around with the family & talk about previous years' memories & their favorite parts. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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