Parrothead Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 A local business owner just walked into my house with a delivery. There was a knock and before I could walk 10 steps there the person was, in my kitchen. Normally if this were just the delivery person I'd complain to the owner. But this was the owner. Then to top it off I was awake until 5am. I was still in my PJs at noon-thirty. Small town gossip being what it is I'm embarrassed to boot. Why do these things happen to me? ETA: I suppose the title should read, To whom do I complain. I'm just so thrown off by this incident. Sorry Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
k2bdeutmeyer Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 Oy! I don't even know, but I would feel so violated. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caroline Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 I think your only recourse is to not shop there again. I would be so embarrassed, too. And angry. And shocked. And... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted November 21, 2012 Author Share Posted November 21, 2012 Luckily I was home and right on Baxter's heels. Otherwise he might have eaten her. The delivery wasn't something I purchased. A friend of mine purchased it for me. If I'd been expecting something I'd have gotten showered and dressed first thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Georgiana Daniels Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 NO WAY!!! I'd write a letter to the business owner and say how displeased you were with his coming into your home and that you won't be patronizing his business anymore. Then, I'd probably put it on Yelp or Angie's List, or whatever online review sites there are for businesses. As for any "official" action, I have no clue unless you were to make a police report. Talk about invasion of privacy. That freaks me out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted November 21, 2012 Author Share Posted November 21, 2012 Sounds like the person is very familiar with your house. I'd run that by the local police chief. Yeah, I've heard stories from a variety of middle-aged people about the events that used to occur here. "Oh, you live in ___'s old house. We had some good times there." Then drifts off dreamily to a flashback. :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 That is unbelievable. I would feel violated and be furious. I would have probably said something in icy tones right on the spot. Do small town social norms constrain what you choose to do? It's almost like a peeping Tom situation, if you ask me. You could have been sick and in your pjs (so don't feel embarrassed) or walking around in your undies or something more private could have been going on. Shees. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted November 21, 2012 Author Share Posted November 21, 2012 Here's a thought. If this person had shown up 5 minutes later I'd've been in the shower. If Baxter had tried to eat the person would I have been liable? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KungFuPanda Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 A local business owner just walked into my house with a delivery. There was a knock and before I could walk 10 steps there the person was, in my kitchen. Normally if this were just the delivery person I'd complain to the owner. But this was the owner. Then to top it off I was awake until 5am. I was still in my PJs at noon-thirty. Small town gossip being what it is I'm embarrassed to boot. Why do these things happen to me? ETA: I suppose the title should read, To whom do I complain. I'm just so thrown off by this incident. Sorry They happen to you because you don't lock your door! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 I. Would. Lose. It. Honestly, I think I'd call the police, see if they'd have a chat w/him regarding the def'n of 'break and enter'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klmama Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 They happen to you because you don't lock your door! I agree. I grew up in a small town, and we were the only family I knew that kept the door locked. My mom was not about to leave it open for anyone to just waltz in, and sometimes people tried. They would knock and then try to open the door. It isn't just a small town thing, though, as it's happened where I live now in the city, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mama Geek Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 Write a letter to the editor of your local paper as well. Maybe some bad publicity for the guy will ensure it doesn't happen again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 Well I'd start locking the door for sure. I would probably call the owner and outright tell them you were uncomfortable with them walking directly into your home and is that standard practice for people who don't answer in 10 seconds. Okay, I might phrase it a little nicer, but I would confront them. Mention your vicious Baxter as well. They owe you an apology, that's probably all you will get, but they should know you were upset. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest submarines Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 I think your only recourse is to not shop there again. I would be so embarrassed, too. And angry. And shocked. And... I would absolutely not be embarrassed by what I'm wearing in my house, no matter the hour! The person should be embarrassed for violating simple etiquette rules. Who on earth enters one's house like this, small town or not? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tutor Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 Since you mentioned the small town element, maybe the business owner has a sense of familiarity and informality that you don't share. I would use that "neighborliness" in your contacting him. Call him and say something like, "Hi. Thanks for trying to help me out by bringing that order right in for me this morning. I appreciate that you feel so comfortable with me that you felt comfortable trying to help me that way. However, I tend to have an odd schedule which causes me not to be 'company ready' during traditional hours, so I would appreciate if, for future deliveries, you could just wait for me to answer the door rather than letting yourself in. Thanks." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justLisa Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 If this ever happens again scream REALLY loud. Then you'll be that "lady in that house who screams if you walk in uninvited." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted November 21, 2012 Author Share Posted November 21, 2012 Since you mentioned the small town element, maybe the business owner has a sense of familiarity and informality that you don't share. I would use that "neighborliness" in your contacting him. Call him and say something like, "Hi. Thanks for trying to help me out by bringing that order right in for me this morning. I appreciate that you feel so comfortable with me that you felt comfortable trying to help me that way. However, I tend to have an odd schedule which causes me not to be 'company ready' during traditional hours, so I would appreciate if, for future deliveries, you could just wait for me to answer the door rather than letting yourself in. Thanks." Thanks I might just do that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 They happen to you because you don't lock your door! :iagree: The time to say something was the minute you saw him in your house. Let's just say that I wouldn't have been friendly. And I would have let the dog loose. (Start locking your doors -- you dodged a bullet this time because the guy happened to be nice, but the next person who pops in unannounced might be of the criminal variety.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 in addition to the suggestions of negative reviews on yelp/angie's list, and a very upfront letter to the owner (do NOT be embarassed - at least not in the letter. you didn't do anything wrong.), I would suggest a copy to the better business bureau. I don't think I'd file a police report, but mentioning to the person it would be within your rights to file a report for trespassing might help get the point across she steppped over the line. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted November 21, 2012 Author Share Posted November 21, 2012 They happen to you because you don't lock your door! The front door is locked. It stays locked. The kitchen door is the door that dh comes in and out of numerous times a day even when he is working. Dd is in and out. Baxter is in and out. And there is no key so if I locked it I'd be at that door all the time letting family in. It has an old old (1890's) mechanism on it that can't be fitted with any old door knob. It is just so odd that the delivery person came in the kitchen door. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin M Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 I was going to agree with Cat. I would get a new door with a lock installed and just give your husband the key. Do you have a gate leading to your back door? There needs to be a no trespassing, guard dog on duty sign or something to keep folks from coming in your back door. You are supposed to have an element of privacy for your back door. I keep my patio door open all the time, but we have locks on the gates so no one can get in our back yard. I would have reamed this person a new one when they appeared in my house. But you have nothing to be embarrassed about the way you were dressed. Complain to the business owner - call them and let them know it was totally unacceptable for them to just enter your house. You were just too shocked to say anything at the time. If this is a small town, the word should get around you value your privacy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TGHEALTHYMOM Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 I found a package in my vehicle once, and one in our back room once... :glare: Since dh wasn't bothered by it... I did not say anything. It felt weird. What really bothered me was the night I was in our bedroom changing a diaper when my ds5 told me a man was in our living room!! I hurried to get in there and it was the Deacon from the church we had joined. I did not know him at all so it scared me. I can't remember now if he knocked, walked in or if my son let him in. Still, it scared me. I would never just walk into a stranger's house. Sorry you have the lock problem! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted November 21, 2012 Author Share Posted November 21, 2012 Nah, the person has already been around and knows the front door is usually locked. He probably didn't mean to tip you off that he knows that fact. He's playing with a bit of fire if he knows your hubby and the dog are in and out. Let your hubby handle it if it is a male. He should drop by the chief's office and find it if you're dealing with a perv. No, it was a woman. Her dh has been here many times before with deliveries and never comes in uninvited. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted November 21, 2012 Author Share Posted November 21, 2012 I found a package in my vehicle once, and one in our back room once... :glare: Since dh wasn't bothered by it... I did not say anything. It felt weird. What really bothered me was the night I was in our bedroom changing a diaper when my ds5 told me a man was in our living room!! I hurried to get in there and it was the Deacon from the church we had joined. I did not know him at all so it scared me. I can't remember now if he knocked, walked in or if my son let him in. Still, it scared me. I'm sorry he scared you. I wasn't scared. And I do kind of know this person. I'm in their establishment a couple times a month. I'm just surprised at the boldness of letting oneself in. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted November 21, 2012 Author Share Posted November 21, 2012 I was going to agree with Cat. I would get a new door with a lock installed and just give your husband the key. Do you have a gate leading to your back door? There needs to be a no trespassing, guard dog on duty sign or something to keep folks from coming in your back door. You are supposed to have an element of privacy for your back door. I keep my patio door open all the time, but we have locks on the gates so no one can get in our back yard. I would have reamed this person a new one when they appeared in my house. But you have nothing to be embarrassed about the way you were dressed. Complain to the business owner - call them and let them know it was totally unacceptable for them to just enter your house. You were just too shocked to say anything at the time. If this is a small town, the word should get around you value your privacy. Unfortunately it is a rental so there is only so much we can do. It is just one more reason I'll be very glad to get out of here come spring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Florida. Posted November 21, 2012 Share Posted November 21, 2012 Since you mentioned the small town element, maybe the business owner has a sense of familiarity and informality that you don't share. I would use that "neighborliness" in your contacting him. Call him and say something like, "Hi. Thanks for trying to help me out by bringing that order right in for me this morning. I appreciate that you feel so comfortable with me that you felt comfortable trying to help me that way. However, I tend to have an odd schedule which causes me not to be 'company ready' during traditional hours, so I would appreciate if, for future deliveries, you could just wait for me to answer the door rather than letting yourself in. Thanks." :iagree: If this is the norm in your small town, then the neighborly response is probably best. She probably doesn't even realize she did something unacceptable. Then, try to do something about that kitchen door. If replacing the door or lock is not an option, maybe you could find (or make) a weather-safe sign to post that tells people to knock and wait for someone to answer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted November 21, 2012 Author Share Posted November 21, 2012 :iagree: If this is the norm in your small town, then the neighborly response is probably best. She probably doesn't even realize she did something unacceptable. Then, try to do something about that kitchen door. If replacing the door or lock is not an option, maybe you could find (or make) a weather-safe sign to post that tells people to knock and wait for someone to answer. I think I'm going to have to put up a beware of Baxter sign. And really no cookie for him. He didn't start barking until she was already in the kitchen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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