Considering homeschooling middle school, advice?

[MapleMom]

My husband and I have begun to seriously consider homeschooling our two youngest children, who are in grades 6 and 7. We're only six weeks into middle school and, well, I won't rant, but it isn't a good fit. My younger son doesn't seem to mind his K-6 school, but he really has outgrown it.

 

Our biggest issue is that I work full-time, and it's not possible for me to leave my job right now. My husband owns his own business and has flexible hours during the day, but he isn't at all confident in his ability to teach the boys. If we were to go ahead and homeschool, I would do any necessary teaching in the late afternoon and evening and he would supervise their independent work during the day. I think I've seen a couple posters here who both work and homeschool - do you think this plan is feasible?

 

My main question, or concern, is whether this level of independence is appropriate for my sons' ages? They will turn 11 and 13 in January (my younger son skipped grade 2) and both are bright and pretty mature for their ages. I've been reading the forum for a couple days and the opinions on independence at this age are so varied that it's hard to get a picture of what expectations are reasonable and how to approach this.

 

I really want homeschooling to be able to work for us - I just can't tell if I'm being realistic. Does anyone have any advice?

 

Also, if anyone has any recommendations for books related to homeschooling older kids, or any curriculum recommendations, I'm open to all the advice I can get. :)

[Mommyof4ks]

I haveno advice on the schedule, but the boys should be able to be mainly independent with some redirection if needed. My dd has been doing her work independently for the most part since last year when she was in the 6th grade, and this year she is in control of her whole schedule and completes her work on time.

[Arcadia]

My main question, or concern, is whether this level of independence is appropriate for my sons' ages? They will turn 11 and 13 in January (my younger son skipped grade 2) and both are bright and pretty mature for their ages. I've been reading the forum for a couple days and the opinions on independence at this age are so varied that it's hard to get a picture of what expectations are reasonable and how to approach this.

 

Unfortunately too many variables are at play about the level of independence your children are capable off. Are they independent with getting their school homework done all these years? Are they good at following a structured timetable/checklist?

 

Also how about the time they are spending on their extracurricular activities like sports, music or whatever they are interested in? If their sports or other activities are in the evening, that would take up some of your "teaching" time.

[Susan in KY]

Unless your boys are intrinsically motivated and have a high degree of responsibility, I would hold off until you have a better system in place. Around our house, school has a hard time getting done late, and "independent" work needs a lot of accountability. Unless your dh is really willing to follow through, it's not a good recipe. Unfortunately, work at home is usually just that, and wearing two hats means something suffers unless your sons are in on the business. I know several families who have a business and do school around it quite successfully.

[Ali in OR]

In general, I think middle school years are GREAT years to homeschool. In our state, the primary goal and metric for public schools is to "close the gap" between low performers on state tests and high performers. You can imagine where the resources are directed. I sat in on a school board member where the middle school vice principal was sharing data and was so excited about how the lower quartiles improved and almost as an afterthought said that there was no growth in the middle school years for students in the upper quartiles. This was comparing individual students' scores to themselves from one year to the next. So yeah, if you want kids to be challenged and grow academically, homeschooling can easily beat public schools around here.

 

We plan to have our dds do public high school, and I taught math at an excellent public school years ago. I have a good idea of how top students perform and that's where I want my girls to be when they enter high school--ready to perform at the highest level (honors courses, eventually AP courses). My 12 yo 7th grade dd can do work independently but I am finding that the quality of the work is really hit or miss. She doesn't really push herself to understand a topic fully. I'm finding that I do have to sit with her and directly teach her how to do a math problem set for instance. We sit together for at least half an hour to learn new material, but I'm finding that the assignment she then completes on her own is pretty poor quality--doesn't show work, lots of wrong answers, etc. I'm seeing it in other subjects too--a little academic laziness. So I'm finding that 2 months into the year I need to increase the amount of time I spend with her in both direct teaching and monitoring her work. She is not as independent as I thought. Doesn't mean I don't think you and your husband can make this work--just be prepared to really follow up on the work.

[TGHEALTHYMOM]

Of course the best book on Home schooling:

 

The Well Trained Mind. Susan Wise Bauer and Jessie Wise

Since you are asking on here, I assume you have heard of it!

 

Veritas Press has an epistula you can subscribe to via email.

Memoria Press has a catalog with some very nice articles to read on classical methods.

 

Andrew Pudewa has some audio lectures on IEW website. I think some are free and some cost a small fee. (IEW is a writing program) even if you don't use it, some of the audio's are helpful.

 

Dorothy Sayers essay on classical education is easy to find on the web.

 

And I like to read books about the Charlotte Mason method.

 

WORLD magazine is also a great tool for us to spark conversations about current world events and it is written from a Christian perspective.

 

Attending a Home school conference may help you decide as well.

 

I also know of several families who have businesses or working parents and even a few single parents.

Most of them use online courses, SOS, TT, and some hire tutors.

 

Definitely the accountability needs to be there no matter the age.

 

And good advice I heard long ago was to try it one year at a time.

 

I would also hope that your husband could get your boys involved in the

 

business some. It would help them just to spend time with him and keep them

 

busy if they have down time. Or if he could help them in any other skill,

 

dad's are important too.

 

There is alot to consider, but with your schedule, you will need help.

Edited October 18, 2012 by TGHEALTHYMOM

[Anne in CA]

If your boys are well motivated to home school, I say go for it! My dh taught my ds math in the evenings when it got to be algebra time and I don't see why you could not do the same with all subjects, assuming you are starting with a good relationship with both boys to begin with. If they do not want to home school and you are trying to teach when you are already tired, I do not think it will last long, lol.

 

I would find materials that are easy to understand and correct, so that your dh could help you with correcting and you were mostly teaching. The curriculum board here is very helpful.

[MapleMom]

Thanks everyone, I'm still thinking everything through and your comments are actually really helpful. :)

 

Both boys handle almost all of their homework independently, and have for a few years now. They can't stand big, artsy projects (I'm pretty sure my son is doing more colouring in grade 7 than he did in kindergarten), so I help with those to make them more bearable. I wouldn't say they're "intrinsically motivated" to do schoolwork, but they do their work without complaint (unless it's colouring :tongue_smilie:), one does math for fun and both go through spurts of reading everything they can get their hands on. The only extracurricular they're doing right now is playing hockey, but their schedules are pretty manageable this year.

 

My husband doesn't really work from home, he just doesn't work much during the day. He owns and operates a hockey rink, and runs a private hockey program and league out of it. So, he mostly works in the evening and on weekends. During the week, he responds to things as they come up, but typically just drops into the rink/office for a couple hours in the afternoon. He could rearrange his schedule to have one or two full days per week at the rink, and the boys could work there, or just adjust on the fly. My husband is very committed to our kids' education, and will always be around, but we both know that he can't help a whole lot with academics.

 

I've spoken a fair bit with my 12-year-old about homeschooling and he is all for it. He's even more frustrated than I am with his middle school and wants to give this a try. My 10-year-old is more hesitant, but I know that if we started homeschooling his brother, he'd be begging to come home within days.

 

TGHEALTHYMOM - thanks for the recommendations! I'm reading The Well-Trained Mind right now. :D I've spent some time reading and research the Logic Stage, but now I've just started reading from the beginning to get a bigger picture. I'll check out the books and articles that you mentioned. :)

[bobbeym]

It's not easy, but it's doable.

 

My DH is disabled so he's home all day to provide some semblence of supervision to our 14yo DS. DS works mostly independently, but he has a very hard time staying focused and on task unless someone is there to redirect him back to his studies.

 

I work full time with a 1hr commute each way. I also do all of the curriculum picking, lesson planning, and all direct teaching for English (writing/literature/grammar) lessons. DH and I both help answer questions for the other courses, and DH sometimes does some grading if I can convince him to help me out.

 

There are some nights when I'm up way later than I should be trying to figure this or that out, but DS doesn't do well in a ps setting and this is what works for him. So we do what we have to do to make the best of it.

[elfgivas]

i think you can do it. maybe if you choose one subject where the curriculum comes with outlines of each lesson, then your dh could do that?

 

as part of our language arts, for example, we use a canadian curriculum called "teach your children to read well". at the grade 6 and 7 level, it focuses on reading fluency (incl. speed), comprehension, vocabulary, etc. in its teacher's manual, there is a step by step of how to teach it. its mainly interactive, and the teaching/listening/correcting part only takes about 20 minutes a day. if he got his feet wet with that, he might be able to see himself doing more.

 

our secret weapon is khanacademy.org. he has 2-10 minute videos teaching a whole range of very specific things. so if, for example, the kids are doing rates or ratios, you can find a video addresses very specific questions. this helps if they get "stuck" when i'm not available, or when all the teaching and examples in the world haven't helped.

 

maybe he could design a woodworking shop to do one morning a week with the boys?

 

and maybe you could do early morning math teaching before work?, to get them started. math just seems easier in the mornings. singapore math takes me about 20 minutes a lesson to teach, max.

 

hth,

ann

[regentrude]

Pulling my kids out in 6th /5th grade was the best thing we ever did. I work part time, and my kids have been trained to work independently on school work. I suggest you find curricula that your kids can work with independently while supervised by your husband. There is actually hardly anything I teach to my 13 y/o; he works mostly independently. We are very eclectic and use a variety of resources before high school; I find the most important piece of curriculum a good math program that fits your student. The rest I mostly improvise.

[LMD]

What about some online courses for some subjects? Or a co-op?

[CheerioKid]

My husband doesn't really work from home, he just doesn't work much during the day. He owns and operates a hockey rink, and runs a private hockey program and league out of it. So, he mostly works in the evening and on weekends. During the week, he responds to things as they come up, but typically just drops into the rink/office for a couple hours in the afternoon. He could rearrange his schedule to have one or two full days per week at the rink, and the boys could work there, or just adjust on the fly. My husband is very committed to our kids' education, and will always be around, but we both know that he can't help a whole lot with academics.

 

Homeschooling was my dh's idea...I always swore I never would. He works nights, and has a flexible sleep schedule. He was "going to do school...I didn't need to worry about it". Hmmmm, not in our world. He is just not motivated like that. I do all of it, and work every other weekend and every Monday. He was going to do school on Mondays, but that doesn't work either, because I come home and the house is a MESS. We made a deal that they would catch up their chores completely on Mondays, then work on independent work (LOF, independent reading, Spelling, etc.) until I come home. It works out ok...It's the only sane solution at the moment...

[Barbara H]

If your dh isn't academically oriented, are there other activities he might be able to do at least part time with the boys during the day? It could be anything - building a shed, nature photography, tinkering with bikes, cooking, etc. Or, maybe the boys could help out with some stuff at the hockey rink. Especially at middle school age there is so much value in hands on learning with adults. Your dh may have more to offer than he's thinking about.

[AimeeM]

I'm not sure I would expect that they are able to work completely independently coming from brick and mortar. I think if you enter into this knowing that they will HAVE TO work independently, you are placing an awful large burden on the children. Working independently, in my world and experience, takes training and isn't something that all children can naturally do.

 

My 11 year old (6th grade) daughter is very independent in her interests and general life - but as far as academics go, she is only able to do grammar and writing independently. The rest (science, history, Latin, math, etc) all take quite a bit of hand holding and are very mom intensive.

 

Some children can handle it, others will melt.

[lauracolumbus]

I think the middle school years are the best years to NOT be in a B&M school.

 

However, I do think it's difficult for some kids to manage their work load all day long w/minimal help. My dd does, but w/my ds it was a big struggle. Online courses are great. And while they will have each other, I would try to find at least one group outing/co-op each week.

 

I would definitely try it b/c they can always return to school if hs'ing doesn't work out. And it could turn out to be the best thing you've ever done. Not immediately of course!

 

Laura

[Arcadia]

He owns and operates a hockey rink, and runs a private hockey program and league out of it. So, he mostly works in the evening and on weekends. During the week, he responds to things as they come up, but typically just drops into the rink/office for a couple hours in the afternoon. He could rearrange his schedule to have one or two full days per week at the rink, and the boys could work there, or just adjust on the fly.

 

My uncles owns family businesses and my nephews and nieces do their school work at the factories/stores. They learn how to manage a business first hand. I am thinking that might work out for your children too as in letting your husband teach your kids how to run his business.

[Catwoman]

I think it could work.

 

I also think your dh will be able to help quite a bit more than he realizes, particularly if you choose online, DVD, or textbook-based courses for your kids. You can also hire tutors if there are any classes that you feel you can't teach on your own, or your family can join a co-op that offers classes.

 

I know many homeschoolers aren't really into textbooks, but the thing is, textbooks have teacher's manuals, and many of those manuals are amazingly detailed about how to present the material to the kids, and of course, the fact that they usually contain all the answers to the assignments and questions is a huge help, too!

 

If this is something you really want to do, I think you can make it work. And remember, we're all here to help you out with ideas and suggestions if you need them! :001_smile:

[CyndiLJ]

I applaud you for considering this so carefully! I totally think it can work for you, and think there are things you can do that might be helpful with that more flexible school schedule you will need. While I generally do most of the homeschooling in our family, I have 4 middle school ages kids along with a 4th grader and often have my kids schooling with Dad in charge. They go to his shop and work independently when I have appointments, or have to travel as I will in two weeks to be with my mom for surgery. Dad doesn't really plan out the schooling and is NOT a language arts guy, (Grammar and writing are not his forte, reading of course he is fine with), but he oversees, makes sure work is progressing, and answers questions or helps as needed.

 

What you might find is there is a learning curve, so to speak, for your kids to develop a little more of the independence needed for this to work well...it won't happen overnight and you'll have setbacks here and there as they too test the waters, but from what you describe they have a good attitude and motivation to make it work, which will be in your favor as well.

 

I would love for more self-teaching materials where possible to ease the burden on you later on. You might consider Teaching Textbooks for math, or some similar program, maybe utilize more online self-directed courses, reading is easy enough to do on their own. If they aren't the crafty type, so much the better for your situation.

 

Best of luck as you try and work this out for your family!

 

Warmly,

Cindy

[HeidiKC]

Unless your boys are intrinsically motivated and have a high degree of responsibility, I would hold off until you have a better system in place. Around our house, school has a hard time getting done late, and "independent" work needs a lot of accountability.

 

I think this would be the biggest problem, and getting them to work their hardest and do quality independent work. It's too easy to not do that, especially (as I've recently learned) for a boy that age!!!

 

I also agree with the person who mentioned extracurricular activities. I know sports take up a lot of evening time for us, as well as playing with neighbor kids who are not home during the daytime. And it seems like a long day that would be pretty hard. Spend most of the day doing independent work, then a couple of hours (?) working in the evening with you when they probably would just want to be done.

 

If you still plan on going ahead with your plan, I'd see if you have any kind of cafeteria-style homeschool "school" they could attend. My son attended a school that met on Mondays and Wednesday and you signed up for classes like you do in college. So you might just choose Algebra and Spanish, add a study hall in lunch. Meaning you'd be there from 11:30-3:00 or whatever on Mondays and Wednesdays. These were academic classes with homework and grades. Or at least sign them up for some enrichment or sports classes during the day.

[MapleMom]

Thank you all so much for the honesty and encouragement!

 

I've just e-mailed the two homeschool groups I know of to see whether they have anything to offer us and for information on other resources nearby. I don't think there are any co-ops within driving distance of us, but hopefully I'm wrong. I'm thinking now that with the right combination of materials this could work for us. I wouldn't be comfortable with all computer-based or online courses, but that might be best for a couple of subjects.

 

The boys don't have any friends in our neighbourhood and their best friends are their friends from hockey, who they mostly hang out with on the weekend. They do have hockey 1-2 nights per week, but I usually get home from work before 5, so even on those nights we could get at least an hour in before or after their games.

 

I never really thought about them helping out at the rink as part of this - they do help out whenever they're needed and sometimes for fun. They love fixing things around the rink and helping out on the ice, but I agree that learning the business side of things could be beneficial too. I did start thinking today about what other areas my husband is knowledgeable in and figured that health/nutrition/fitness and geography/current events are subjects that they could work on together that would break up their day a bit.

 

I'm about to dive into curriculum research, so I'm sure I'll have lots more questions. :D

[Tasia]

That actually sounds like a great plan to me! My boys would love to spend that much time with their dad, and I've been really surprised at just how well they work independently and together.

 

My middle schoolers are doing AoPS Pre-algebra and Jacobs Algebra completely independently, as well as Derek Owens Physical Science. He has online math classes as well, which I'll be switching my oldest to when he finishes Jacobs. They're also using K12 Human Odyssey for ancient history and Lightning Literature semi-independently. I think both of these could be done independently, with discussions every few days.

 

Good luck and welcome!