LNC Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 (edited) Thanks everyone! Edited May 17, 2012 by LNC Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom2samlibby Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 She sounds like wonderful nurse, but the rest of that would drive me batty. I would have to let her go for those reasons. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 Find someone else. Sounds like you don't need the stress. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 Your comment "a screw was loose" says it all. (Not 'quoting' to respect your wish.) I don't know - if she does her job really well, she might be hard to replace in that respect. Could you train yourself to lighten up about her drama? Maybe try to see the humor in it? Have you ever tried sitting with her and describing how "you" want the interaction to be between you and her? I would try that before looking elsewhere, personally. I had a nanny who used to drive me batty, so I kind of know where you're coming from. One of my kids had bad chemistry with her and would not do anything "normal" around her. But the other kid loved her, and she was a very conscientious worker. So I forced myself to try to work with her, with limited success, until the kids were ready for preschool. Good luck - I know this is tough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unicorn. Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 I would talk to her and tell her she needs to chill. Tell her exactly what you expect of her; exactly what you don't want her to do. If she can't or won't change- I think I would find someone else. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgehog Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 Personally, I would find someone else, because I wouldn't be able to cope with that kind of drama and stress. Anything for a peaceful life, me. (Said kinda tongue-in-cheek, but I do seek to keep external stress to a minimum!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
houseofkids&pets Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 I would try to work it out with her first since she has a great bond with your ds and does her job well. I think that you really need to be specific about your wishes and needs. Then, if things don't improve, I would look for someone else. It sounds like you have enough going on in your life. Get rid of the things that cause stress/drama whenever possible. :grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emzhengjiu Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 I'm wondering if something happened on her watch with another patient that is making her hyper vigilant now caring for your son? I'm not implying that she has done anything wrong, but it sounds to me as if she's covering herself if anything were to happen to your son. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 I'd get rid of her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pgr Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 If it were me, I'd look for someone else. If it were a temporary situation, eg for the summer, etc, then I'd stick it out. In this case, her coming sounds like something to dread every other day. From what you've described, I think that's just her personality; I would doubt talking to her would change her approach (of course, you can try - you're the better judge of whether it'd be worth it). Though it's not easy to find someone good that is also a terrific match as far as personality goes, there really are excellent specialists out there. Maybe ask your pediatrician? You need someone to help you care for your son, not a supervisor to report to.... :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 In this particular situation, a caregiver can become more like an extended relative and thus create a little havoc with the harmony of the household since she is too controlling for your needs. I'd let her go. I'd be professional, gentle, thank her profusely for taking such good care of your son, and then move on. Boundaries are important for your family's well being. Sorry you have to go through this! :grouphug: Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
********* Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 If I were you, I'd be seeing if the Th-F nurse could do M-W, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alte Veste Academy Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 If I were you, I'd be seeing if the Th-F nurse could do M-W, too. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LNC Posted May 16, 2012 Author Share Posted May 16, 2012 (edited) nm Edited May 17, 2012 by LNC Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthwestMom Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 I would try to work it out with her first since she has a great bond with your ds and does her job well. I think that you really need to be specific about your wishes and needs. Then, if things don't improve, I would look for someone else. It sounds like you have enough going on in your life. Get rid of the things that cause stress/drama whenever possible. :grouphug::grouphug: :iagree: It's probably not easy to find someone who can has the expertise to take care of your son as well as fit smoothly into your household. I would sit with her in a quiet moment and talk about what is and is not working for you. I would really emphasize your boundaries in regards to the drama she is causing. It is not okay for her to offend your doctor, for heaven's sake! If she is not willing to follow the chain of command that you outline for her, then she has to go. You deserve peace in your own house. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissad2 Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 It sounds like she is treating it like a hospital setting. She sounds like she's one of those inflexible nurses who refuse to give a little. I work with a nurse like that and she will call a Dr about anything, even something that should be nursing judgement and does not warrant a call to the Dr. Believe me the Dr's absolutely hate it! She's old school and set in her ways and there is just no changing her! I couldn't stand it in my own home and would have to find a replacement. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 I would talk to her and tell her she needs to chill. Tell her exactly what you expect of her; exactly what you don't want her to do. If she can't or won't change- I think I would find someone else. :iagree: She needs to know who's in charge -- and that it's not her. :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 You are the client. Yes, she was hired by the agency but you hired her through the agency. I would get another nurse. I know there are many worthy nurses out there hoping for jobs right now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
applethyme Posted May 16, 2012 Share Posted May 16, 2012 I also have a medically fragile child that gets cna/nursing hours. I have had similar problems and can pretty much assure you that you can talk until you are blue in the face and will not get anywhere with this nurse. We have had to make changes in caregivers for similar behaviors. Perhaps you could ask the Th-F nurse if she knows a nurse that may work out. It may take some time and work to find a nurse that works out, but it will be worth it to not have the daily drama. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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