I don't want to babysit while homeschooling...

[Celia]

I'd tell my dh to consider babysitting while he's doing his job. :glare:

 

ETA I would consider doing afterschool care to bring in a bit.

Edited January 1, 2012 by Celia

[lluv]

I think it depends on your personality and how "needy" the child your watching is and how independent your children are. Based on my experience, I don't think I will ever do it again. I did it for about 6 months and couldn't handle it. I have a 5 yr old and an 18 month old, and I was watching a 3 year old. It is also my first year homeschooling, so I was getting frustrated and annoyed every single day. I realize now that I just don't enjoy watching other people's kids (with the exception of family). Everyone has their own view of discipline and respect, and ours was different than the child's parents. DH was against it from the beginning because the parents are our friends and he didn't want to mix "business with pleasure". I insisted that we needed the money, and I initially thought I could do it all. A few weeks into it I realized I was very, very wrong. :svengo: Then we had issues with payment/days off and it became an uncomfortable mess. DH decided that the $$ wasn't worth it and made me stop.

 

Not saying it's impossible, just not preferable.;) At one point, my SIL homeschooled her 12 & 10 yr old, had a PreK, toddler, and watched 4 other kids (2 toddlers, 2 babies)!!! She'll be the first one to tell you it's made her crazy:willy_nilly:!

[lluv]

Unless I was being paid $$$ I wouldn't. But that is me. What is the back up plan if you are sick, the kids are sick, the baby is sick? Get everything in writing, paydays ect. I have been burned one to many times. So no I wouldn't.

 

My thoughts EXACTLY! You've got to think of every scenario and have everything in writing, even if they are friends/family or you WILL get burned and the relationship will be ruined.

 

My youngest was a preemie, so I had a "no sick" policy. I would tell the parents their kid was sick, but the parents would say, "Oh no, he's not sick, it's just allergies/sinus issues." Magically, my kids got sick every.single.time!!

 

Then there were times that I had to "remind" them to pay me. So not worth it.

[2squared]

I don't even want to babysit my baby during the day! :lol:

 

I dream about being able to conduct school without a baby.

 

Then I dream about being able to conduct school without a toddler.

 

Then I dream about being able to conduct school without a preschooler.

 

If all those dreams magically came to fruition in the next four years, I would NOT voluntarily go back to life with a baby or a toddler or a preschooler.

[plain jane]

I don't even want to babysit my baby during the day! :lol:

 

I dream about being able to conduct school without a baby.

 

Then I dream about being able to conduct school without a toddler.

 

Then I dream about being able to conduct school without a preschooler.

 

If all those dreams magically came to fruition in the next four years, I would NOT voluntarily go back to life with a baby or a toddler or a preschooler.

 

:iagree: Amen. :D

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Except I know I want another baby.:blush: :willy_nilly:

But I can dream about not having to do school with another baby, can't I? :tongue_smilie:

[venusmom]

It's probably all been said - I didn't have time to read every single post...sorry! I do babysit - 2 toddlers with crazy schedules...1 comes all day 3-4 days per week - very easy-going and sweet. 1 is rambunctious go-getter but he usually only comes from about 1-5:30 pm everyday. I have a newborn 3 days per week. I keep 3 kids after school, 2 are the newborn's older brothers so I only have them when he's here. Not to mention...I think I must run the 'kool-aid house' in the neigborhood because on any given day there are 5 or 6 kids stopping by to play with my kids. Babysitting at home can be crazy to do, but we badly need the income.

 

First- the good - some mom's are AMAZING - one of my mom's pays one month in advance, every month. She or her husband always make sure I know what time they are dropping off or picking up - they always call if they are late or have any special needs. They always remember my kids and sometimes does random nice things for us, which is absolutely not required. Still yet - we are blessed with gift cards for dinner or birthday gifts for my kids and other little surprises. These mom's make keeping their children a joy.

 

On the other hand here are the problem(s) I continually come up against:

 

1.) INSIST on payment in advance and be firm - they will always get later and later if you let them pay @ end of week. I have no problems getting paid this way - if they are late it's only 1 day and then I've only kept child 1 day. I tell them I am budgeting on this money and their employer pays them on a set schedule - so I expect same. When they talked me into paying at the end of the week they were ALWAYS late - so I stopped that altogether.

 

2.) I have the toughest time with the two toddlers never bringing what they need. No wipes, or extra clothes usually - never any ointment for rashes and sometimes they bring them without shoes though one is nearly 2 and the other is nearly 3! Not good if I have to run an errand as I can't carry them both - and I walk to the bus stop everyday to pick up after schoolers. They also sometimes forget a jacket. And toddlers have accidents so, despite constant requests for a change of clothese, I've sent them home in my kids t-shirts that swallow them completely and I never get them back. I've asked every way I know - but they just act like they are in too much of a hurry to take care of this. They'll put in an extra outfit for a day or two and then it's no longer in the bag despite my reminders. Both mom's are my friend's daughters and they just could use a little prioritzing. This totally drives me crazy because I worked until a few years ago and my kids bags were always well stocked because I did not want my child to be uncomfortable and I did not expect another to provide what my kids needed.

 

3.) Last minute schedule changes and refusal to pay for days scheduled because they didn't bring their children (even though a day care would not permit this and my policy clearly states they pay for scheduled days).

 

4.) Forgetting to tell me a day they were not scheduled to be there suddenly got changed (one of my mom's has a regularly scheduled weekday off) I open the door at 7:30 a.m. and look surprised and she'll say something like, "oops - I forgot to tell you I'm working today". Picking up child late without calling - occasionally very late. And the mom who txts me @ 10:00 p.m. Sunday nite or 7:30 Monday morning to tell me she just can't afford child care this week so she'll be leaving the kids with her boyfriend. All of these things are budgeting nightmares if you are counting on the money - and planning nightmares if you planned a dr appt or field trip and suddenly have an extra kid. Sometimes - I've actually had to give some "tough love" and refuse to take a child when they did not tell me they were coming because my children and I made plans that would not work with an extra child (such as no extra seatbelt or trip to museum or doc).

 

NOW - on the other hand - I used to live in a larger town and I had a home child care and had NONE of these problems quite this bad. I now live in a smaller town that seems to have a much lower median income for most families - and it is crazy what I seem to deal with. Ugh. Not trying to scare you - but just thought you and your dh might consider these possibilites.

 

Also, in case you are thinking I should just have a policy about these items, all of these are covered in my policy that I give my parents and have them sign - and I do have the option to tell these parents to hit the road - but it gets tough when you really care about the child - and you are friends with the grandmother's - I just can't tell you how many nights I've told my dh that "if they do _____ one more time, I am telling them they need to find someone else to watch their child"! Guess I'm just a softie for these little guys - my kids and I are all attached to them - they are kind-of like family - the mom's though...well - I just don't know!!! :confused: Really though - I care about them - they are just in great need of prayer for sure!

 

Just a bit of ranting from someone who keeps way too many kids someday's - but I truthfully WOULDN'T CHANGE IT FOR THE WORLD. I've learned patience like nobody's business - and every kid in the neighborhood knows who to come see when they want to play with my kids or just need a safe place to hang out after school. I've doctored more skinned knees and removed splinters till I feel like I should charge a fee for running a neighborhood clinic. But I love watching them laugh and play in the backyard and overhearing the silly little conversations with my kids. It's all good stuff that will be gone someday - so I'm just thankful to be home so I get to be a part of this. This may not be your situation - because you are only considering keeping one - but you do become attached to the family (even the mom's that don't seem to have it together)- and then things get tough if there is a problem.

[venusmom]

My thoughts EXACTLY! You've got to think of every scenario and have everything in writing, even if they are friends/family or you WILL get burned and the relationship will be ruined.

 

My youngest was a preemie, so I had a "no sick" policy. I would tell the parents their kid was sick, but the parents would say, "Oh no, he's not sick, it's just allergies/sinus issues." Magically, my kids got sick every.single.time!!

 

Then there were times that I had to "remind" them to pay me. So not worth it.

 

Almost forgot - this is one of the toughest probs I have...arriving with sick kids. They tell me same thing - it's allergies / sinus or we forgot and gave her too much milk so her tummy hurts...and then we are all fighting exactly what they came in with. Years ago - I had one mom drop a child off & hand me a pill to give @ 10 a.m. for nausea...I tried to stop her - and she ran to her car...I even ran after her when I felt the child's blazing hot forehead but she backed out of my drive in a rush. I took temp - it was 103...I called her to come back because my kids well checks were scheduled that day of all things. Needless to say - I had to ask that parent to find another caregiver...sad since we adored the child and he was good friends with my son - but there had been other events like this and this one was final straw.

[MissKNG]

Yikes! This thread is scaring me!! What did I get myself into?!?!? :tongue_smilie:

[Vanna]

...I didn't expect to have such great responses -- on both sides of the issue.

 

I wish I could respond personally to each post, but please accept my general "thanks" esp. to those who laid out the parameters for "if" I do choose to babysit (I have to admit -- I REALLY don't want to now after reading all the comments in this thread, LOL!

 

There are a few I do need to respond to personally, because you guys hit the nail on the head!

 

I'm right there with you.

 

I finally had to have a heart-to-heart with my dh about his constant suggestions that I might want to get a job 'a few nights a week' or start a from home business.

 

I feel I contribute enough to the household at this season in our lives. We dont 'need' the extra income.

This is EXACTLY how I feel and what I've told dh. He acts like I'm speaking a foreign language. It was so confirming to have you say this.

 

...And it was getting hurtful, because everytime dh 'suggested' one of these things, it translated in my head to 'you don't do enough around here, why don't you do more'.

Ugh!!!! And yes, yes, yes -- this is how I feel too!

 

 

...Of course dh didn't realize that's how I 'heard' what he said. But once we sat down and talked about it, he understood. Once I calmly pointed out how me taking on a job would mean he had to take over some responsiblities (read: ANY responsibilites around the house), he wasn't so keen on the idea anymore. And he admited we don't NEED the money right now; rather, this was his less-than-open way of saying he hopes some day to not be totally, completely responsible for carrying 100% of the financial burden. We now have a 10 year plan, if you will, and it hasn't been brought up since.

Great to hear you and hubby were able to work it out. With the holidays just behind us and the in-laws having just visited with us, I think dh has succumb to their pressure that, "...your wife should be working..." (he told me they all think I should be working :( ).

 

 

...I say, see if you can find some down time to really discuss this with your dh. You know, BEFORE his comments drive you to be, uh, well, cranky with him, and he's left looking like this: :001_huh:. Of course, I'm sure I'm the only one who ever does that, LOL. :lol:

Oh, my stars! LOL! LOL! You must know me "IRL" because I've been cranky all week and when hubs asked me about how I'm feeling yesterday, I couldn't put it into words other than to say I'm unhappy and have no reason to be happy right now.

 

Here's an idea for you -- why not have your dh babysit an infant for a mom who works the night shift? You know, since apparently it's so easy and all... ;)

:lol: I would LOVE to see my dh try this out -- it would be like "Mr. Mom" the movie, part 2! He already got this figured out though -- he said we'd only take someone who had "teacher's hours" so no baby crying and screaming at night or on weekends. :tongue_smilie:

 

...Unless you're in dire need of cash, I don't think it's worth taking the time away from your own family to start babysitting. It's a lot of work and stress, particularly if you aren't 100% into the idea of it.

Thankfully, we're not in a dire need situation right now. We definitely need to cut back on things -- I know that will fix our slight financial shortfall.

 

(to be continued)

[Vanna]

I tried to watch an infant a few years ago. It was right after dh was laid off and at the time I had a 6yo and a 9 yo.

It didn't work for us. I hated having an infant. It was hard to homeschool. I had a lot of trouble with the very young mom. She didn't get me my own car seat so I would have to pull hers out every day.

Ugh, ugh, ugh!

 

...The baby was sweet. I thought I would enjoy having a baby around again. I thought it would help get rid of that baby craving I had. Well, it did that!

The mom found someone else to watch her for free. It worked out perfectly. I got an easy out. Those 8 weeks were no fun. I could go on and on about why it didn't work out. I think it was the young mom and baby daddy drama and the fact that I worked for less than $3 an hour. That just stinks.

I went to cleaning houses in the afternoons. I clean 3 houses a week (one a day) for a minimum of $20 an hour. It gives me time to homeschool in the morning, cook dinner, and take the kids to activities in the evening. My parents watch the boys while I'm gone. Each house takes me about 3 hours, with travel time I'm only gone 4. I also do bookkeeping for a NPO one day a week. This arrangement has worked much better than babysitting did. By far.

Thanks for sharing about your babysitting experience. :thumbup1:

 

My hubs asked me to send him the link on this thread! :D Hope it's an eye-opener for him!

 

I'm about to begin a FT babysitting job this Tuesday that will run through June. The mom is a teacher so it's on a "teacher schedule" (M-F days with ps vacations). I will watch a 3 yo and a 18 month old.

 

This is going to work out in regards to school because in the morning we do Bible, crafts and snack/story time. Everyone can participate in these activities. I always work on the core subjects at night when my small girl goes to bed - math, reading and/or science. So, for our particular school schedule, babysitting will work.

 

It's probably all been said - I didn't have time to read every single post...sorry! I do babysit - 2 toddlers with crazy schedules...1 comes all day 3-4 days per week - very easy-going and sweet. 1 is rambunctious go-getter but he usually only comes from about 1-5:30 pm everyday. I have a newborn 3 days per week. I keep 3 kids after school, 2 are the newborn's older brothers so I only have them when he's here. Not to mention...I think I must run the 'kool-aid house' in the neigborhood because on any given day there are 5 or 6 kids stopping by to play with my kids. Babysitting at home can be crazy to do, but we badly need the income.

 

First- the good - some mom's are AMAZING - one of my mom's pays one month in advance, every month. She or her husband always make sure I know what time they are dropping off or picking up - they always call if they are late or have any special needs. They always remember my kids and sometimes does random nice things for us, which is absolutely not required. Still yet - we are blessed with gift cards for dinner or birthday gifts for my kids and other little surprises. These mom's make keeping their children a joy.

 

On the other hand here are the problem(s) I continually come up against:

 

1.) INSIST on payment in advance and be firm - they will always get later and later if you let them pay @ end of week. I have no problems getting paid this way - if they are late it's only 1 day and then I've only kept child 1 day. I tell them I am budgeting on this money and their employer pays them on a set schedule - so I expect same. When they talked me into paying at the end of the week they were ALWAYS late - so I stopped that altogether.

 

2.) I have the toughest time with the two toddlers never bringing what they need. No wipes, or extra clothes usually - never any ointment for rashes and sometimes they bring them without shoes though one is nearly 2 and the other is nearly 3! Not good if I have to run an errand as I can't carry them both - and I walk to the bus stop everyday to pick up after schoolers. They also sometimes forget a jacket. And toddlers have accidents so, despite constant requests for a change of clothese, I've sent them home in my kids t-shirts that swallow them completely and I never get them back. I've asked every way I know - but they just act like they are in too much of a hurry to take care of this. They'll put in an extra outfit for a day or two and then it's no longer in the bag despite my reminders. Both mom's are my friend's daughters and they just could use a little prioritzing. This totally drives me crazy because I worked until a few years ago and my kids bags were always well stocked because I did not want my child to be uncomfortable and I did not expect another to provide what my kids needed.

 

3.) Last minute schedule changes and refusal to pay for days scheduled because they didn't bring their children (even though a day care would not permit this and my policy clearly states they pay for scheduled days).

 

4.) Forgetting to tell me a day they were not scheduled to be there suddenly got changed (one of my mom's has a regularly scheduled weekday off) I open the door at 7:30 a.m. and look surprised and she'll say something like, "oops - I forgot to tell you I'm working today". Picking up child late without calling - occasionally very late. And the mom who txts me @ 10:00 p.m. Sunday nite or 7:30 Monday morning to tell me she just can't afford child care this week so she'll be leaving the kids with her boyfriend. All of these things are budgeting nightmares if you are counting on the money - and planning nightmares if you planned a dr appt or field trip and suddenly have an extra kid. Sometimes - I've actually had to give some "tough love" and refuse to take a child when they did not tell me they were coming because my children and I made plans that would not work with an extra child (such as no extra seatbelt or trip to museum or doc).

 

NOW - on the other hand - I used to live in a larger town and I had a home child care and had NONE of these problems quite this bad. I now live in a smaller town that seems to have a much lower median income for most families - and it is crazy what I seem to deal with. Ugh. Not trying to scare you - but just thought you and your dh might consider these possibilites.

 

Also, in case you are thinking I should just have a policy about these items, all of these are covered in my policy that I give my parents and have them sign - and I do have the option to tell these parents to hit the road - but it gets tough when you really care about the child - and you are friends with the grandmother's - I just can't tell you how many nights I've told my dh that "if they do _____ one more time, I am telling them they need to find someone else to watch their child"! Guess I'm just a softie for these little guys - my kids and I are all attached to them - they are kind-of like family - the mom's though...well - I just don't know!!! :confused: Really though - I care about them - they are just in great need of prayer for sure!

 

Just a bit of ranting from someone who keeps way too many kids someday's - but I truthfully WOULDN'T CHANGE IT FOR THE WORLD. I've learned patience like nobody's business - and every kid in the neighborhood knows who to come see when they want to play with my kids or just need a safe place to hang out after school. I've doctored more skinned knees and removed splinters till I feel like I should charge a fee for running a neighborhood clinic. But I love watching them laugh and play in the backyard and overhearing the silly little conversations with my kids. It's all good stuff that will be gone someday - so I'm just thankful to be home so I get to be a part of this. This may not be your situation - because you are only considering keeping one - but you do become attached to the family (even the mom's that don't seem to have it together)- and then things get tough if there is a problem.

MissKNG -- wow! Thank you for laying out the "real deal" on your babysitting experience and the great advice!

[Joanne]

I ran a full on, licensed daycare while homeschooling.

 

Unless you HAVE TO, I would not recommend it.

[QuirkyKapers]

I wouldn't do it. Especially if you don't want to. I am not really an infant person though.

[Vanna]

I don't even want to babysit my baby during the day! :lol:

 

I dream about being able to conduct school without a baby.

 

Then I dream about being able to conduct school without a toddler.

 

Then I dream about being able to conduct school without a preschooler.

 

If all those dreams magically came to fruition in the next four years, I would NOT voluntarily go back to life with a baby or a toddler or a preschooler.

:iagree::lol: I have to add that I couldn't agree with you MORE! :D When my children were "baby, toddler, and preschooler age" I'd have similar dreams and I suffered from "handbag envy" (looking at my friends with their cute little handbags while I was slugging around a diaper bag that looked and felt more like gym bag!).

 

I feel like I've paid my dues... I don't voluntarily want to go back to that season of life either.

[jhschool]

Depends on your kid, your homeschooling, and the baby.

 

If your kids need personal attention with the homeschooling

(and this varies from kid to kid), then it might not work.

I need to correct my DS's Grammar and Writing workbook

pages, help him with Algebra when he gets stuck,

guide him as to how to study for tests, read

out loud, teach him Spanish and French one on one, etc.

I can't imagine taking care of someone important (like a

baby)! I barely take care of the dogs' needs (like putting

them in and out all day) and am barely on top of housework

(will the laundry pile never go down?) and making meals!

Also I need to drive to activities quite often.

If the baby is very low-key you might pull it off.

 

Take your child's neediness + the homeschooling

level of attention required for your children to have a good

education + the neediness of the baby. If they equal

a handleable amount, go for it. If they add up to more

than you can give, in energy or time, don't do it.

[Vanna]

I appreciate the feedback, jh.

 

My hubs was the one who needed convincing that this would not be a good thing for us/me right now. He read this thread today and said "okay. fine." and agreed to not bring the issue up anymore. :001_smile:

 

So, once again, I express my gratitude to all who took the time to post. :hurray:

[jennsmile]

I appreciate the feedback, jh.

 

My hubs was the one who needed convincing that this would not be a good thing for us/me right now. He read this thread today and said "okay. fine." and agreed to not bring the issue up anymore. :001_smile:

 

So, once again, I express my gratitude to all who took the time to post. :hurray:

 

 

LOL! You are welcome!

[6packofun]

Good thoughts. I would never, ever take on anyone else's children while trying to homeschool. I just can't do it.

 

If dh felt that strongly about ME adding more to my full-time homeschooling mother/house manager position, then he'd have to brainstorm with me to find another option or HE could bring in a little more.

 

My dh was getting his bachelor's degree online and during that time I went back to work, just Saturday mornings, and I told him I'd give it a year. He had a *year* to find another way of making more money (new job) or adding in a simple PT job. (We have 2 old, unreliable vehicles, so my job had to work around his or he had to do something additional.) He interviewed twice in a year, didn't land anything, and when my year was up--NOT a fun year, btw, and homeschooling was difficult--I QUIT. He's still looking and hoping to find something, but I helped our family for a year, out of sacrifice, and that sacrifice was too much with homeschooling. I won't do it again until ALL my kids are older. My financial contribution was so minimal it ended up not being worth it. It didn't raise our income above the poverty line and adding in gas it was barely a profit. There are many things to weigh in this situation.

 

I've got to admit, I get a little prickly when I hear about a husband who has a great idea for his busy at-home wife to make more money, though. Sometimes it can work, but I always wonder what the motivation is there. Not understanding that homeschooling is a *huge* commitment irks me and I'd remedy that pretty fast.

[katilac]

I'm glad he came to his senses :lol:

 

Let him know how lucky he is - if my dh had suggested I watch a baby for extra money, during school but NOT when he was home, I would have slapped the stupid right out of him.

[Catwoman]

I'm glad to hear that your dh is on board with your decision not to babysit! :001_smile:

[*********]

I appreciate the feedback, jh.

 

My hubs was the one who needed convincing that this would not be a good thing for us/me right now. He read this thread today and said "okay. fine." and agreed to not bring the issue up anymore. :001_smile:

 

So, once again, I express my gratitude to all who took the time to post. :hurray:

 

Woot! :D

[Teachin'Mine]

I appreciate the feedback, jh.

 

My hubs was the one who needed convincing that this would not be a good thing for us/me right now. He read this thread today and said "okay. fine." and agreed to not bring the issue up anymore. :001_smile:

 

So, once again, I express my gratitude to all who took the time to post. :hurray:

 

 

Awww. He's a good guy. :) Maybe he can take you out to dinner to make it up to you. :D :lol:

[Vanna]

I'm glad he came to his senses :lol:

 

Let him know how lucky he is - if my dh had suggested I watch a baby for extra money, during school but NOT when he was home, I would have slapped the stupid right out of him.

ROTFLOL!!!! :lol: Oh, man! That's rough! :lol:

 

Awww. He's a good guy. :) Maybe he can take you out to dinner to make it up to you. :D :lol:

Hmmm.... good thinking! I think he just might have to do that ('cause I'm still feeling cranky about the whole subject, hee, hee!).