Everyone should see this.

[ravinlunachick]

A facebook friend of mine shared it, but I figure I can reach more people here than on my FB. It's horrifying how many people would not help this little girl. (It was a staged abduction in public, fwiw, to test people's reaction. No real danger.)

 

[Pink Fairy]

Wow, that was hard to watch. :(

 

If this had been real, I imagine the outrage would have been similar to the outrage people felt about that poor child in China.

[clementine]

Terrible! I am usually disgusted by the non-reactions of people in these hidden camera tests. :mad:

[Live2Ride]

It amazed/infuriated me that the older couples walked by and a guy with a kid! it was a few 20 something year old fellas that came to help her. All men.

[Mama2Many4]

I don't know what's wrong with people. My kids have gotten mad at us in the past and thrown tantrums. They've never once screamed out that we weren't their parents. That should be a red flag for people right there.

[kalanamak]

It says suburban New York. I'm wondering where. I've lived in both coasts and the midwest, and in Topeka and Seattle, I would have taken action, but not in NYC or Westchester. It would be more likely a set up to rob you.

[ravinlunachick]

I don't know what's wrong with people. My kids have gotten mad at us in the past and thrown tantrums. They've never once screamed out that we weren't their parents. That should be a red flag for people right there.

 

I agree. When my oldest was 3, she could throw some SPECTACULAR tantrums. I always expected someone to question why Dh or I was carrying a shrieking child under our arms, but no one ever did.

[ravinlunachick]

It says suburban New York. I'm wondering where. I've lived in both coasts and the midwest, and in Topeka and Seattle, I would have taken action, but not in NYC or Westchester. It would be more likely a set up to rob you.

 

I think the policeman's badge or mybe the tagline under his picture said New Rochelle, IIRC.

[pqr]

Disgusting, what has become of society?

 

Did they ever try this in Southern States or the Mid West?

 

I suspect it may be very dangerous in places where many people have concealed carry permits.

[ravinlunachick]

That is an interesting point. I wonder if the responses would vary regionally, or by rural vs urban/suburban.

[kalanamak]

I think the policeman's badge or mybe the tagline under his picture said New Rochelle, IIRC.

 

I would have shouted for help and run to call the police, but I would not have taken that man on in New Rochelle. I'll only give one example, but I have many. Man walking in Westchester Co. A man on a bike rides by and squirts him with ketchup from a red squeeze bottle. The shopkeeper, who was sweeping the stoop grabs a rag and sympathizes extremely while dabbing the ketchup. He also picked the pocket while he was at it.

 

However, in Topeka and most of Seattle, I would have made quite a stink.

 

My ex husband and I were walking through the Seattle U district years back. He is from India, and a nice milk-chocolate skin color. A group of teens in engineering boots (I don't see them any more but back then it meant skinheads) started stepping on his heels and razing him. He was a New Yorker and it never occurred to him to ask for help. I started stopping everyone walking by in the dark to stop and stand with us, and NOT one person refused. When we outnumbered them, they left, and some walked us to our car.

 

I also wanted to add that female nurses are more likely to come to the aid of an apparently injured stranger, and get killed, AFAIR, than any other profession.

[pqr]

That is an interesting point. I wonder if the responses would vary regionally, or by rural vs urban/suburban.

 

Having lived in very rural areas I know the response would be different. People there will stand aside when a child gets a "whipping" but if they think that an abduction is occurring the abductor might not be long for this Earth.

[danybug]

Gosh, that is ridiculous! All the more reason that children and parents need to be all the more alert, because obviously you can't count on others to always come to their aid. We watched it and were shocked of all the demographics of the passerby's, who decided to take action.

[Garga]

I remember a thread on this awhile ago. I can't find it, though.

[Kirch]

I think people would take action here. Or at least, one lady did in Wal-Mart. Ds 7 looks nothing like dh. When he was about 3, he went through a phase of talking about whoever wasn't with him at the time missing him, not knowing exactly what he and whoever he was with were doing, etc. Well, one day he went out with dh. They were in the middle of Wal-Mart and he pipes up with, "My mommy doesn't know where I am!" A lady was standing nearby and dh could tell from her reaction that she thought he had taken ds. Sure enough, when they got to the front of the store, he was approached by security. By that time, ds was acting clingy and calling him daddy, so it ended up being nothing. But dh was sure nervous for a few minutes there! I told him he needed to keep a family photo in his wallet.

[mazakaal]

That is shocking.

 

The news report said that the action taken didn't have to be physical. There was an elderly lady in the background calling 911 when the two young guys were approaching the 'abductor.' So even if a person was afraid that it was a setup for being robbed, they could have called 911 instead of walking past and ignoring the situation.

 

I thought it was interesting that the people who did take action were ones who seemed rather intimidating, young guys in street clothes, who looked pretty tough, guys that I might have been wary of if they had approached me on the street, but they were the ones who stepped in to help.

[swellmomma]

It is for this reason I teach my kids to scream fire if someone is trying to take them. People are not likely to chalk it up to a bad kid when they are screaming fire kwim.

[ravinlunachick]

It is for this reason I teach my kids to scream fire if someone is trying to take them. People are not likely to chalk it up to a bad kid when they are screaming fire kwim.

 

I've heard "Fire!" yelled as a joke so much, though, that unless I saw smoke, I'd immediately dismiss it. I don't think that's such a good idea. If people are inside and don't hear alarms going off, they'd probably ignore it as well.

 

I don't know what the answer is, but hearing that child in the video yelling, "You're not my dad!" made me think of an episode of King of the Hill, where Bobby takes a woman's self defense course and begins yelling, "That's my purse! I don't know you!" :lol:

[BatmansWife]

When the guys turned around and started taking action....I was like, "Yay!!!!" They are heroes! :thumbup1:

 

 

 

That is shocking.

 

The news report said that the action taken didn't have to be physical. There was an elderly lady in the background calling 911 when the two young guys were approaching the 'abductor.' So even if a person was afraid that it was a setup for being robbed, they could have called 911 instead of walking past and ignoring the situation.

 

I thought it was interesting that the people who did take action were ones who seemed rather intimidating, young guys in street clothes, who looked pretty tough, guys that I might have been wary of if they had approached me on the street, but they were the ones who stepped in to help.

 

A good reminder to not judge a book by its cover. I remember years ago there was a safety video that was available and there were clips of it online. One clip was a group of kids sitting listening to a discussion about safety. Two men walked out in front of them. One had on a business suit, tie, and was carrying a briefcase. One had on a leather jacket, jeans, bandana on his head, and looked like a thug. The kids were asked which guy was the bad guy. They all said the guy with the leather jacket. As they were being asked the next question, the guy with the business suit grabbed one of the kids in the front row...as quick as a flash. So, it was teaching them that bad guys can look like good guys. I thought that was a great thing to teach our kids.

[FaithManor]

Having lived in very rural areas I know the response would be different. People there will stand aside when a child gets a "whipping" but if they think that an abduction is occurring the abductor might not be long for this Earth.

 

 

I agree with this. In our area, it would be a very dangerous thing to stage. In my town, this is how it would go down. Several bystanders would jump the perp while a granny comforted the child. The civilians would kick his butt until he begged for mercy. No amount of "it was a joke" would get them to stop because a. anyone who would stage something like this would be viewed as a sicko anyway and b. they wouldn't believe him. The "kidnapper" would be subdued and have at least two guns pointed at his head long before the police arrived. Amongst the crowd there would probably be more than one man that had previously been deputized for some reason. Most of the men in my town that are upstanding and have no record, have been deputized at one time or another to assist with something major. We don't have enough law enforcement officers out here and two state police posts were closed, so the sheriff has kept himself busy training civilians to be deputized for posses when necessary. We even have an active sheriff's posse on horseback...these guys are good too!

 

The sheriff would get there to find the perp in need of medical assistance and call 911. He'd be cuffed to the gurney because the sheriff wouldn't believe his story. If the cameramen and the rest of the crew came forward (not wise to do so until law enforcement is there to protect them), the sheriff would arrest them too for setting up a situation that resulted in a fraudulent report/911 response for a "staged gimmick". Social services would be called to interview the child and find out what kind of parents would allow their child to participate in such an event. In all likelihood, the entire crew would be arrested. Perp would have a concussion, at least one broken bone, and look like he'd been in a roll-over accident. He'd get his day in court after being released to the jailhouse from the hospital.

 

The county prosecutor would be so disgusted by the whole thing that the most he'd do to any of the civilians is wink and remind them not to participate in vigilante justice. He'd throw the book as far as he could at the idiots that staged the kidnapping. The local paper would hail the crowd as heroes.

 

My dad used to be the town constable and once had to take down a drunk swinging a broken glass bottle. Drunk didn't come out looking or feeling to good in that contest. Of course, dad wasn't about to get his head laid open with the bottle so if the perp hadn't been fairly easy to knock down and keep down, dad would have shot him in the leg and no one would have given it a second thought.

 

When it take 20 minutes for any hope of law enforcement to get on the scene, people have a tendancy to take care of things themselves, right or wrong. This rural area is also, shall we say, FIESTY! We've also got a very conservative, "you got what you deserved so shut up and stop whining" type sheriff and everyone loves him.

 

Faith

[amo_mea_filiis.]

I have to defend the people who did not take action; She was yelling that he's not her dad. He could have been the step dad, a babysitter, an aide for an unruly child, etc.

 

I think kids should be taught to yell that they don't know this person. That is completely different from "he's not my dad" IMO.

[Trresh]

I would help, but I would have been pretty mad to find out it was staged.

 

 

I agree. I can't stand watching the 20/20 undercover stuff for just that reason. I saw a lady on there once pour her heart out to a teen that was posing to be pregnant and was being pressured by her boyfriend to get an abortion. I'd be so ticked that they wasted my time on their little social experiment. John Quinones would've gotten more than an earful from me.

[MBM]

Robert Cialdini discusses this sort of situation in his book Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion. The term he gave it is social proof. In a nutshell, people tend to not help if others are not helping. On the other hand, if others are helping or someone explicitly asks for help or gives instructions, strangers will often come through. Humans look to others, their social environment, when deciding what to do unless they are conditioned or made to be more aware. Kalanamak mentioned some experiences that illustrate this concept well.

 

It's a fascinating book. Amazon link here.

[The Girls' Mom]

I probably would have been one to pass on by, for a couple of reasons.

 

1. That kid didn't look all that upset.

2. I have a cousin who's child went through a phase of screaming "you aren't my mother" during temper tantrums at stores. :glare:

 

If the child really looked like they were in distress, I probably would have done something. But that child did not.

 

I have taught my girls to fight like wildcats if someone grabbed them. I mean screaming, scratching, kicking, etc.

[Hwin]

I've seen a few episodes of WWYD where this type of reaction was anticipated, and the police and 911 dispatchers were in on it.

[Kirch]

I probably would have been one to pass on by, for a couple of reasons.

 

1. That kid didn't look all that upset.

2. I have a cousin who's child went through a phase of screaming "you aren't my mother" during temper tantrums at stores. :glare:

 

If the child really looked like they were in distress, I probably would have done something. But that child did not.

 

I have taught my girls to fight like wildcats if someone grabbed them. I mean screaming, scratching, kicking, etc.

 

I kind of wondered about that too--she did sound more like she was throwing a tantrum or whining than like she was terrified, especially the clips where she wasn't specifically saying that he wasn't her dad. Too, the persistence of the "abductor"--I'd think that a real would-be abductor would quit trying and run in a situation like that, in public and with an older child who he'd have to drag off kicking and screaming and who had already attracted some notice (even if they didn't stop). So I guess my thinking might be that there was something else going on. Still, I hope I'd stop and make sure, either way, especially if she was screaming that it wasn't her dad. Better safe than sorry.

[Leav97]

I agree with this. In our area, it would be a very dangerous thing to stage. In my town, this is how it would go down. Several bystanders would jump the perp while a granny comforted the child. The civilians would kick his butt until he begged for mercy. No amount of "it was a joke" would get them to stop because a. anyone who would stage something like this would be viewed as a sicko anyway and b. they wouldn't believe him. The "kidnapper" would be subdued and have at least two guns pointed at his head long before the police arrived. Amongst the crowd there would probably be more than one man that had previously been deputized for some reason. Most of the men in my town that are upstanding and have no record, have been deputized at one time or another to assist with something major. We don't have enough law enforcement officers out here and two state police posts were closed, so the sheriff has kept himself busy training civilians to be deputized for posses when necessary. We even have an active sheriff's posse on horseback...these guys are good too!

 

The sheriff would get there to find the perp in need of medical assistance and call 911. He'd be cuffed to the gurney because the sheriff wouldn't believe his story. If the cameramen and the rest of the crew came forward (not wise to do so until law enforcement is there to protect them), the sheriff would arrest them too for setting up a situation that resulted in a fraudulent report/911 response for a "staged gimmick". Social services would be called to interview the child and find out what kind of parents would allow their child to participate in such an event. In all likelihood, the entire crew would be arrested. Perp would have a concussion, at least one broken bone, and look like he'd been in a roll-over accident. He'd get his day in court after being released to the jailhouse from the hospital.

 

The county prosecutor would be so disgusted by the whole thing that the most he'd do to any of the civilians is wink and remind them not to participate in vigilante justice. He'd throw the book as far as he could at the idiots that staged the kidnapping. The local paper would hail the crowd as heroes.

 

My dad used to be the town constable and once had to take down a drunk swinging a broken glass bottle. Drunk didn't come out looking or feeling to good in that contest. Of course, dad wasn't about to get his head laid open with the bottle so if the perp hadn't been fairly easy to knock down and keep down, dad would have shot him in the leg and no one would have given it a second thought.

 

When it take 20 minutes for any hope of law enforcement to get on the scene, people have a tendancy to take care of things themselves, right or wrong. This rural area is also, shall we say, FIESTY! We've also got a very conservative, "you got what you deserved so shut up and stop whining" type sheriff and everyone loves him.

 

Faith

 

And all of this could happen only to find out the child is a step-child and mad at her new step-dad and decided to throw a fit. And the town was nice enough to beat down her new Dad and reinforce that she has great power over her parents and can get whatever she wants now. Do the townspeople then get charged with assault in your scenario?

[VaKim]

I probably would have been one to pass on by, for a couple of reasons.

 

1. That kid didn't look all that upset.

2. I have a cousin who's child went through a phase of screaming "you aren't my mother" during temper tantrums at stores. :glare:

 

If the child really looked like they were in distress, I probably would have done something. But that child did not.

 

I have taught my girls to fight like wildcats if someone grabbed them. I mean screaming, scratching, kicking, etc.

 

:iagree: I thought she sounded like a whiny brat throwing a fit. Not truly scared and upset at all. Perhaps had she been crying or begging him not to take her away or some such thing, it would have been more convincing.

[DawnM]

Yes.

 

And there are several times when I look and think, "Well, that is not the action I would have taken."

 

For example: There was an episode where they were in a restaurant. They had a black father and a white child. The waiter says, "Is this YOUR child? I think we need to call someone to verify" or whatever.

 

People who were outraged that the waiter would do and yelled at the waiter were commended and people who got up and walked out because they were upset at the waiter were commended. They did NOTHING IMHO.

 

And yet, if I were in that situation, I would have calmly found the manager or someone higher up and asked him/her to take care of the situation. There is no way I would "take on" the situation.

 

What good am I going to do just shouting at the waiter or whoever? Someone in authority needs to be called and notified and the waiter needs to be fired.

 

Another situation had children misbehaving in a restaurant. There is NO WAY I am disciplining someone else's children in front of their parents.....and yet those who did were touted as "doing the right thing."

 

In this particular situation, I would have been on the phone with 911. Possibly. Still not sure the child seemed all that believable.

 

Dawn

 

I would help, but I would have been pretty mad to find out it was staged.

[Kate in Arabia]

The only episode I have seen is one where they had a Muslim woman (actress) vocally refused service at a bakery (staffperson was an actor). Responses from people in the store ranged from vocal support of the staff, to vocal support of the woman, to nothing.

 

It upset me, I think it hit too close to home :(

[unsinkable]

I remember a thread on this awhile ago. I can't find it, though.

 

I remember it, too.

 

I also started a thread about a similar issue when my DD was sick while walking the dog. She needed to borrow a phone to call me to come and get her. It really opened my eyes to what people might be thinking and what she might encounter in her future when/if she gets sick in public (she has epilepsy but her seizures aren't typical tonic-clonic seizures.)