I'm feeling over-emotional & panicky

[Aubrey]

I know it's just hormones, but I keep having this overwhelming depression that comes out of *nowhere.* I was trying to explain it to dh when he had to go to work, so of course I got mad at him, which makes no sense.

 

Then I figured it was just as well that I have some time to myself--at least I can't hurt anyone's feelings, right? (Baby's napping, kids are playing outsided.)

 

But then I had a repeat of last night's incident. I'm typically wildly imaginative, so I'm good at worst-case-scenario, but I'm also an under-reactor, so other than scaring dh, it works out well. Otherwise I might be a hypochondriac, kwim?

 

But the repeat of the incident, probably combined w/ my already emotional state, puts me on the verge of tears. I know I don't need to call mw--she wants an update Mon AM & will probably see me Mon afternoon instead of Fri. I'm sure things will be fine between now & then...so what is it that I'm worried about? I don't know. I guess I just don't feel like being a grown-up today. I want dh to come home & hold my hand. LOL (Not really, because chances are, I'd be mean. *Hey, where's the sad-face smiley? I need one!*)

 

Thanks for listening. Sorry for the whine.

[OnTheBrink]

I have no idea what last night's event was, but :grouphug:

[Aubrey]

I have no idea what last night's event was, but :grouphug:

 

Oh, sorry. http://www.welltrainedmind.com/forums/showthread.php?t=24929&highlight=pregnancy+erm

[Mom2legomaniacs]

Okay dear, call her again since you had a repeat episode. It isn't in the middle of the night or anything. Please call her. I want you to take care of yourself or I'll just come there and do it for you! And you don't want me to come there! How's that for a scolding. ;)

 

Please do call again. I am worried for you. I am going out now, but will check on you later. Please drink plenty, stay off your feet as much as possible and call the mw. Okay? Okay!

[Caroline]

Call your midwife. I really think you should call. Are you sure she didn't say call back if it continues or repeats? Call.

[UnPrairieMuffin]

a good endorphine rush from exercise. If you're able, you could go walk around outside with your kids or put in an exercise DVD (if you're that type!).

 

When I was pregnant with my 4th I had to exercise, it seemed like I had tons of mental energy. And usually it would manifest itself as nervousness, anxiety, etc. It's natural considering what happened to you, but some gentle exercise or stretching might do a world of good (when I say gentle I mean walking outside at a slow pace, or just stretching your body very slowly).

 

Or just practice some deep breathing?

 

Hope you feel better,

 

Erin :001_smile:

[Aubrey]

Okay dear, call her again since you had a repeat episode. It isn't in the middle of the night or anything. Please call her. I want you to take care of yourself or I'll just come there and do it for you! And you don't want me to come there! How's that for a scolding. ;)

 

Please do call again. I am worried for you. I am going out now, but will check on you later. Please drink plenty, stay off your feet as much as possible and call the mw. Okay? Okay!

 

But it's Saturday, & she's Jewish!!

 

No, really, she told me she couldn't tell anything over the phone, which was what I'd thought anyway, & since I haven't got any other symptoms, she said she'd probably run some tests but thinks it's probably no big deal.

 

You don't seem to understand. I don't call. Not even in labor. Dh has to override me & call if it's waking her up (& when isn't it?). LOL

 

Dh will be home in a few hrs. I don't know why that helps, but I'll feel better. Really, I'm just feeling crazy.

[Aubrey]

a good endorphine rush from exercise. If you're able, you could go walk around outside with your kids or put in an exercise DVD (if you're that type!).

 

When I was pregnant with my 4th I had to exercise, it seemed like I had tons of mental energy. And usually it would manifest itself as nervousness, anxiety, etc. It's natural considering what happened to you, but some gentle exercise or stretching might do a world of good (when I say gentle I mean walking outside at a slow pace, or just stretching your body very slowly).

 

Or just practice some deep breathing?

 

Hope you feel better,

 

Erin :001_smile:

 

Oh gosh! That's a kick in the pants! LOL I'm feeling all bloated & crampy & icky. You can't make me. :p

 

But it *is* pretty outside...ack. Are you sure you didn't mean "go eat ice cream?" ;) lol--arguing w/ someone over something petty like this is already making me feel better. See? I don't need *exercise*--bleh. :lol:

[Halftime Hope]

you can hate me if you want to, cuz I'm being a big old butt-in-ski, but I don't care if she's Jewish and this is her sabbath. You need to call her. You didn't hire her for a part-time job.

 

Spotting again is something that needs to be checked out.

 

It may very well be nothing, and if so, we will all breathe a sigh of relief and thanksgiving. But if it is something, you want and need to know early. Early gives you and the providers more options to take care of you and of the babe in the best way possible. You have more choices when you catch it early.

 

My apologies for being so opinionated. I'm praying for God's care for you and the babe.

 

{{Aubrey}}

 

Val

[Robin Hood]

Oh my. Waiting has got to be the worst thing. Prayers form here.

[Jennifer in MI]

you can hate me if you want to, cuz I'm being a big old butt-in-ski, but I don't care if she's Jewish and this is her sabbath. You need to call her. You didn't hire her for a part-time job.

 

Spotting again is something that needs to be checked out.

 

It may very well be nothing, and if so, we will all breathe a sigh of relief and thanksgiving. But if it is something, you want and need to know early. Early gives you and the providers more options to take care of you and of the babe in the best way possible. You have more choices when you catch it early.

 

My apologies for being so opinionated. I'm praying for God's care for you and the babe.

 

{{Aubrey}}

 

Val

 

:iagree:

 

If you won't make the call - have your dh do it. What's his email address? I think we all ought to bombard him with emails telling him to make the call.

 

When does he get home? Please keep us updated!!

[Aubrey]

you can hate me if you want to, cuz I'm being a big old butt-in-ski, but I don't care if she's Jewish and this is her sabbath. You need to call her. You didn't hire her for a part-time job.

 

Spotting again is something that needs to be checked out.

 

It may very well be nothing, and if so, we will all breathe a sigh of relief and thanksgiving. But if it is something, you want and need to know early. Early gives you and the providers more options to take care of you and of the babe in the best way possible. You have more choices when you catch it early.

 

My apologies for being so opinionated. I'm praying for God's care for you and the babe.

 

{{Aubrey}}

 

Val

 

Well of course I don't hate you for being sweet & concerned. And if she knew I wouldn't call her on a Sat, she'd probably say the same thing.

 

That said, though, it's not continuous. It's not that much. I imagine it's fine to wait. It just caught me at an already-emotional point, & got to me, kwim?

 

She can't really tell me anything else unless I come in. She's over an hr away, & dh is at work, w/ our only car. Which would all be no big deal if this were continuous, obviously something to worry about. But it's not. It's so little that afterwards, there's no evidence that it ever happened. I figure worst-case scenario, I'd need an ultrasound or something. That won't be poss until Mon anyway. Kwim?

 

I tell you what. I'll compromise & call dh. He's panick-prone. Ugh. But it's Saturday, so he'll be uber-busy. Hmm....he gets off in 5hrs....

[Tammyla]

I missed last night's post, but at 6 months I'd call her and hubby. Then you can rest easy. Prayers for you and the little one.

[Tammyla]

Oh, and just so you know...You have our permission to be grumpy, emotional, hyper-sensitive, teary, giddy or any other way with no guilt. You are making a baby and it's a big job 24/7.

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

you can hate me if you want to, cuz I'm being a big old butt-in-ski, but I don't care if she's Jewish and this is her sabbath. You need to call her. You didn't hire her for a part-time job.

 

Spotting again is something that needs to be checked out.

 

It may very well be nothing, and if so, we will all breathe a sigh of relief and thanksgiving. But if it is something, you want and need to know early. Early gives you and the providers more options to take care of you and of the babe in the best way possible. You have more choices when you catch it early.

 

My apologies for being so opinionated. I'm praying for God's care for you and the babe.

 

{{Aubrey}}

 

Val

 

Valerie is is right.

 

Aubrey, please call. I understand about ignoring a feeling of dread on your own behalf, but I understand it less when there is unexplained spotting and it's your baby you're talking about.

 

I'm also not trying to scold you or to act like you don't know what's going on with your own body. But because you've posted here -- and I'm not sure if you're looking for us to say, "Oh, don't worry, you're right to feel reticent about calling your provider" or if you're looking for opinions to the contrary -- I will say that any pregnant woman needs to listen to her body. One of the first signs of preterm labor for me was simply an overwhelming feeling that something was not right. Not anything specific, no real contractions that were making me uncomfortable, no blood -- just a feeling of alarm.

 

Every time that happened, my providers smiled indulgently and patted me on the head (ok, not, but it felt like it) and strapped me to a monitor. Then they admitted me to the hospital. Because yes, every time, my head knew something was wrong even though it wasn't obvious. This happened with all three pregnancies, and twice with one of them.

 

I'm not saying anything is wrong, I'm not saying you shouldn't try to figure out what is going on at home. But if your midwife didn't want to be "bothered" by her patients, she would be in another line of work. Trust me, it would bother me more as a person responsible for your care that you wouldn't call than if you did. Valerie is so right -- early means they can take care of you. Late often means simply damage control. And I'm not talking damage control like you didn't get your timing belt changed out on your car at 100K miles and now you have to replace that AND your water pump AND you get to pay a towing charge AND you get to pay for a hotel for two nights because you broke down 300 miles from home and they can't do the work until Monday morning. This is damage control with a tiny human life.

 

Nurses are trained to tell patients that if something, ANYthing, doesn't feel right emotionally that they are to call, day or night. The reason they are trained to say this is that this unease is an early warning sign and is not to be ignored. So if you're still feeling this way, or if you're spotting more or if it's starting to change at all, please call.

[Aubrey]

Valerie is is right.

 

Aubrey, please call. I understand about ignoring a feeling of dread on your own behalf, but I understand it less when there is unexplained spotting and it's your baby you're talking about.

 

I'm also not trying to scold you or to act like you don't know what's going on with your own body. But because you've posted here -- and I'm not sure if you're looking for us to say, "Oh, don't worry, you're right to feel reticent about calling your provider" or if you're looking for opinions to the contrary -- I will say that any pregnant woman needs to listen to her body. One of the first signs of preterm labor for me was simply an overwhelming feeling that something was not right. Not anything specific, no real contractions that were making me uncomfortable, no blood -- just a feeling of alarm.

 

Every time that happened, my providers smiled indulgently and patted me on the head (ok, not, but it felt like it) and strapped me to a monitor. Then they admitted me to the hospital. Because yes, every time, my head knew something was wrong even though it wasn't obvious. This happened with all three pregnancies, and twice with one of them.

 

I'm not saying anything is wrong, I'm not saying you shouldn't try to figure out what is going on at home. But if your midwife didn't want to be "bothered" by her patients, she would be in another line of work. Trust me, it would bother me more as a person responsible for your care that you wouldn't call than if you did. Valerie is so right -- early means they can take care of you. Late often means simply damage control. And I'm not talking damage control like you didn't get your timing belt changed out on your car at 100K miles and now you have to replace that AND your water pump AND you get to pay a towing charge AND you get to pay for a hotel for two nights because you broke down 300 miles from home and they can't do the work until Monday morning. This is damage control with a tiny human life.

 

Nurses are trained to tell patients that if something, ANYthing, doesn't feel right emotionally that they are to call, day or night. The reason they are trained to say this is that this unease is an early warning sign and is not to be ignored. So if you're still feeling this way, or if you're spotting more or if it's starting to change at all, please call.

 

Oh, Pam. That's how I felt w/ #3. And I was wrong, completely wrong. W/ this one, my sense is that everything's fine. Since I just called last night, I don't want to pester her, kwim? What really concerns me, though, is that *now* I am feeling a tad crampy, bloated, etc. And my back's been killing me for days.

 

Y'all are helpful for measuring over-reacting sans hormones. When I went into labor w/ #1, I cried & told dh it wasn't labor. I got super emotional. He had to come around, hold my hand, & call mw himself. That's kind-of how I feel now. I just need y'all to hold my hand & say, "Yes, this is a reason to call. It's ok."

 

I will call--I tried to call a second ago, but the phone has to recharge first. :glare:

 

Thanks for being gentle. ;) Sorry to need it. :tongue_smilie:

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

Oh, Pam. That's how I felt w/ #3. And I was wrong, completely wrong. W/ this one, my sense is that everything's fine. Since I just called last night, I don't want to pester her, kwim? What really concerns me, though, is that *now* I am feeling a tad crampy, bloated, etc. And my back's been killing me for days.

 

Y'all are helpful for measuring over-reacting sans hormones. When I went into labor w/ #1, I cried & told dh it wasn't labor. I got super emotional. He had to come around, hold my hand, & call mw himself. That's kind-of how I feel now. I just need y'all to hold my hand & say, "Yes, this is a reason to call. It's ok."

 

I will call--I tried to call a second ago, but the phone has to recharge first. :glare:

 

Thanks for being gentle. ;) Sorry to need it. :tongue_smilie:

 

Where does your back hurt? Lower back pain, cramping, being emotional, spotting with mucus can equal early labor. You mentioned the back pain to mw yesterday, right?

[Aubrey]

Where does your back hurt? Lower back pain, cramping, being emotional, spotting with mucus can equal early labor. You mentioned the back pain to mw yesterday, right?

 

It's lower back pain, & I did mention it to her. I knew back pain could be a sign of labor, but I didn't know it was specifically a sign of early labor until talking to a neighbor (who's had preterm labor) a few mins ago. Of course, I'm 6mos pg, so my back is *going* to hurt, kwim?

 

I'm giving the phone 5 more min or so to charge, so I don't get cut off in the mid of a conversation, & I've got her # in front of me.

 

Thanks again, Pam. (And everybody.)

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

It's lower back pain, & I did mention it to her. I knew back pain could be a sign of labor, but I didn't know it was specifically a sign of early labor until talking to a neighbor (who's had preterm labor) a few mins ago. Of course, I'm 6mos pg, so my back is *going* to hurt, kwim?

 

I'm giving the phone 5 more min or so to charge, so I don't get cut off in the mid of a conversation, & I've got her # in front of me.

 

Thanks again, Pam. (And everybody.)

 

Aubrey, while you wait, go drink some water. Hang in there. Everything is going to work out just fine. {{{{Aubrey}}}}

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

Oh, and I wanted to tell you that I saw your new couch on TV this morning, on one of those Discovery Health shows. I was all... "That's Aubrey's new couch!"

 

I'm easily amused, it seems.

[Aubrey]

Aubrey, while you wait, go drink some water. Hang in there. Everything is going to work out just fine. {{{{Aubrey}}}}

 

Ooooh. I read your mind. LOL

[pianoplayer]

Aubrey, I'm praying for you. :) Have you talked to your midwife yet?

 

My first baby came as a complete surprise at 32 weeks. Please take care of yourself and your precious little one. :grouphug:

[RoughCollie]

Praying here, too, Aubrey.

[Mom2legomaniacs]

Aubrey,

 

I am home now and am hoping you are okay. I hope that you did call. You really need to call. You and that baby are way too important. It is okay to call and to be expected. Please let us know when you can. Praying for all!

[Mrs Mungo]

I have no advice, I hope everything is OK. A midwife should be used to dealing with pregnancy hormones, she will understand if you call.

[Janna]

I am late to this thread, so I assume you have called your mw. I just wanted to chime in to say that in case you haven't called for some reason, at this point, since it's a repeat episode and you've had placenta previa in the past, you need to call now.

 

I'm praying that you have and that everything is OK.

[TraceyS/FL]

:hug:

 

Newbie here hoping you called and we got you worried for nothing.

 

But ya, call and bug. It might "feel" ok, but it doesn't "sound" ok.

[Aubrey]

I chickened out while the phone was charging & took a nap.

 

But then I read y'all's new comments, bit the bullet, & called.

 

As before, she said there's not a lot to be done, that short of driving an hr out to see her or going to an ER, I can't be tested for infection until Mon. And she seems pretty stuck on testing for bladder/yeast infection.

 

I hope I represented myself well & fairly. I'm always so concerned about over- or under-describing. Is the spotting a little or a lot? I don't know. Is the cramping like PMS? Well...yes. But it's not periodic, like contractions. It's more of an all-around my waist dull pain. Like I'm wearing a belt that's too tight or something. And I told her that....

 

She didn't mind the call, but since that's what I thought she'd say, I'm...chagrined? I blamed it on dh, though. I said he would insist that I call because he's panic-prone. :D

[Janna]

I'm glad you called...but to be honest, I don't like her response.

 

If you have spotting, regardless of whether it's a little or a lot, and you have had it 2 days in a row, then who cares about an hour drive to her or an ER? She must have reason to suspect a bladder infection, but based on how you've described it here, a bladder or yeast infection never crossed my mind. Does it hurt to urinate? Is the back pain only near the kidneys? I know I'm not a Dr., but honestly either you described things differently to your midwife, or she is giving you some questionable advice. I'm not in any way trying to suggest that you are lying to us or to her because I really don't think you are. Something just sounds off and it concerns me.

 

I don't usually word things so strongly or give my unsolicited opinion in this manner, but because I'm pg too and had spotting and know the steps my physician took with me (and it wasn't even a repeated occurance!), perhaps I feel a little closer to the situation?

 

Anyway, in the meantime (meaning until Monday), you really, REALLY need to take it easy. Just in case you have placenta previa again. Don't strain yourself. Drink lots of water to keep hydrated and keep your feet up as best you can. Seriously. Don't mess around with this. Again, that's in mnsho!

 

(((Aubrey)))

[Aubrey]

I'm glad you called...but to be honest, I don't like her response.

 

If you have spotting, regardless of whether it's a little or a lot, and you have had it 2 days in a row, then who cares about an hour drive to her or an ER? She must have reason to suspect a bladder infection, but based on how you've described it here, a bladder or yeast infection never crossed my mind. Does it hurt to urinate? Is the back pain only near the kidneys? I know I'm not a Dr., but honestly either you described things differently to your midwife, or she is giving you some questionable advice. I'm not in any way trying to suggest that you are lying to us or to her because I really don't think you are. Something just sounds off and it concerns me.

 

I don't usually word things so strongly or give my unsolicited opinion in this manner, but because I'm pg too and had spotting and know the steps my physician took with me (and it wasn't even a repeated occurance!), perhaps I feel a little closer to the situation?

 

Anyway, in the meantime (meaning until Monday), you really, REALLY need to take it easy. Just in case you have placenta previa again. Don't strain yourself. Drink lots of water to keep hydrated and keep your feet up as best you can. Seriously. Don't mess around with this. Again, that's in mnsho!

 

(((Aubrey)))

 

She was talking about a bladder infection last night when I called, too. She asked the same questions you did, & I told her no. She said sometimes these types of infections can be asymptomatic.

 

She told me I could take some herbs so I'd "feel like I was doing something." Yeah, I'm w/ you. I didn't like the response. But she also had that tone where you can tell she's trying to decide how to read you. Like she's waiting for me to give her more info.

 

But I don't have any. I want *her* to tell *me* what to do, lol! I don't want to wonder if I just have a high pain threshold, kwim? But I must, because based on my tone of voice, etc., she tends to underestimate me.

 

I really do think things will be fine until Mon, & she's delivered all of my other babies w/out a problem. I trust her, so...I'm going to trust her now. But I don't like it.

 

W/ #3, I was ABSOLUTELY convinced that my due date was at least a mo. off, & she really made me mad, not believing me. I mean, she'd listen & all, but in the end, she wouldn't change my due date. It was embarrassing to be treated like a neurotic nitwit who's just ready to be un-pregnant.

 

And then the silly baby waited around & came on. her. duedate. The one date babies are *never* born, ya know? So I felt really...silly. Dh is sweet. He insists that at 9.5 lbs, it's reasonable for me to argue that she was actually a mo overdue. Haha.

 

Anyway, thanks for not liking it w/ me. Now I feel like cleaning house or something to make up for all the time I've wasted worrying today. :tongue_smilie: (*This* is why I don't call! LOL)

[Doran]

Bleh. It's so hard to be in your situation. Not knowing, worrying, feeling like maybe you're making something out of nothing. I just have a couple of tidbits for you, Aubrey.

 

First, there is still ER should you feel it's time to go that route. Don't forget that option, even though it's not your first choice (which I totally get), it is there for you, a tool at your disposal, right?

 

Second, don't doubt yourself, but also don't let fear and worry allow themselves to look like something else. Try to relax, to get your mind off of the tension and panic. Some of your symptoms are very real, very tangible -- others could be meaningful or could be just a result of wacked out hormones, a couple fights with dh, your general anxiety, and the fear of not having a readily available source of help (see #1).

 

Could you watch a movie tonight? Maybe even a really cathartic one that would give you a chance to cry without needing any excuse. We just watched a really sweet one, "Dear Frankie". Maybe you have another favorite that has one of those wonderfully happy endings? Just wishing you could find a way to completely step out of the worry for a bit this evening. Not sure if that would work for you or not.

 

I'm sorry, for I know this has you in a real tailspin. Sending you heaps of courage, and the ability to breathe, breathe, breathe.

 

Hugs dear!

[RoughCollie]

I'm glad you called your midwife. I think that was the right thing to do.

 

I hope you at least take it very easy until Monday. I know you have children to care for, but when your DH comes home, maybe he can take over so you can lie around.

 

Personally, if this were happening to me, I would go to the E.R. just to be on the safe side.

 

I'll keep praying for you.

 

RC

[Aubrey]

And now my brother & his "wife" want to come over! :blink:

 

I was good. I said no. Absolutely not.

 

He just called back & said they'd gotten gifts for the dc & could they at least drop those by. I caved.

 

And the house is a wreck from yesterday's organizing & the month's sewing frenzy. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

.

 

But I don't have any. I want *her* to tell *me* what to do, lol! I don't want to wonder if I just have a high pain threshold, kwim? But I must, because based on my tone of voice, etc., she tends to underestimate me.

 

I really do think things will be fine until Mon, & she's delivered all of my other babies w/out a problem. I trust her, so...I'm going to trust her now. But I don't like it.

 

 

Anyway, thanks for not liking it w/ me. Now I feel like cleaning house or something to make up for all the time I've wasted worrying today. :tongue_smilie: (*This* is why I don't call! LOL)

 

Here are the things that make me worry about you:

 

1) You're nesting. I REALLY don't like that along with the symptoms you're having.

 

2) Back pain with spotting. That's just scary.

 

3) Cramping. With back pain and spotting.

 

4) You have a feeling something is amiss.

 

5) Now you're even more worried and embarrassed about being paranoid and you're even less likely to call should this continue or change.

 

As to tone of voice, bah. She can't base her worry about you on *that*.

 

I don't like it with you, too, and please listen to Janna and stay off your feet if you can and hydrate like crazy. Rest on your left side, keep your bladder empty, and just concentrate on growing this baby for a couple of days.

[pianoplayer]

Aubrey, what you have related worries me, and I am continuing to pray for you. Obviously, I'm no doc, and I don't play one on TV :D , but I have delivered two babies prematurely, and I know that the only way my OB could know for sure what was happening was to examine me herself and put me on the monitor to check for contractions, baby's heart beat, etc. There's no way she would try to diagnose the symptoms you are describing over the phone! I hope that if you have any more scary symptoms, you will go to the E.R. You and your little one are worth getting the very best care! :)

 

P.S.: Aubrey, you must have the patience of a saint to put up with so many of us telling you what to do! :)

[Mom2legomaniacs]

Yes we are definitely telling the poor dear what to do aren't we! But we care so much and are very worried. So hopefully that will come through more than the bossiness will.

 

Please take great care Aubrey!

[Jennifer in MI]

:grouphug:Oh man. I can't imagine the frustration you must be feeling right now. :grouphug:

 

I'm with Janna. This just doesn't sit right. Your midwife knows you - she should know that you don't just call about nothing. It takes a lot to get you to call (including labor!! LOL). Would she see you for an emergency? What is her backup? I guess I'd think with these symptoms and with your history of previa, I'd want to go in and make sure everything was okay. If it continues, please go to the ER. Just make sure it's okay.

 

Oh - and I'm asking this just because I haven't seen it asked yet - are you still feeling the baby moving? Has there been a decrease in movement? (That can be a sign of labor)

 

:grouphug:

[Aubrey]

:grouphug:Oh man. I can't imagine the frustration you must be feeling right now. :grouphug:

 

I'm with Janna. This just doesn't sit right. Your midwife knows you - she should know that you don't just call about nothing. It takes a lot to get you to call (including labor!! LOL). Would she see you for an emergency? What is her backup? I guess I'd think with these symptoms and with your history of previa, I'd want to go in and make sure everything was okay. If it continues, please go to the ER. Just make sure it's okay.

 

Oh - and I'm asking this just because I haven't seen it asked yet - are you still feeling the baby moving? Has there been a decrease in movement? (That can be a sign of labor)

 

:grouphug:

 

I know, how could the hive be wrong? But what am I going to say? My imaginary friends *insist* that I come in & be seen? ;)

 

First, I don't think she remembers the previa. It was diagnosed by an OB w/ #2 before I switched to her. (I started both #1 & #2 w/ diff docs.) It showed up on the sono, & I mentioned to her that I was supposed to have a follow-up sono to make sure it had corrected itself. She scheduled it, but didn't seem to think it was a big deal. (Maybe I'm remembering the wrong term? Maybe it really wasn't a big deal?)

 

Anyway, the 2nd sono showed that everything was fine. Then I delivered baby (from 1cm to crying baby in our arms) in 19 min. For whatever reason, there was excessive bleeding. I forget where they draw the lines to determine hemmorhage (sp), but I was *just* over.

 

That was nearly 6 yrs ago, though, & it hasn't come up since. I've only been to one appt w/ her so far, since I spent so long trying to decide if I should find someone closer, covered by ins, etc.

 

And since she's a birth center, mw, etc., she doesn't do the same kinds of fetal monitoring you're talking about. Hmm--that wasn't you...well, whoever.

 

Yeah, she knows me, but I also tend to convey that "everything's ok." She also knows my med hist.--all good. I can hear in her voice that she's weighing whether it's worth me calling dh home from work & dragging our 3 dc all the way out to her office. I think.

 

As far as fetal movement, everything feels normal. Honestly, though? I think everything's fine. Even if this turns out to be labor (which I doubt), I'm not sure enough about my LMP to be totally panicked. I mean, I'm pretty sure, & at my last appt, I measured close enough to the right size that I doubt that that's the case, but...I'm just not worried. I'm emotional, lol, but not worried. Can I draw that distinction?

 

And now that dh is home, I feel *so* much better. There's a sane person to oversee everything, kwim? And I got brownie points from him for a) calling & b) napping, 2 things I NEVER do. He's putting the dc to bed, cleaning the kitchen, & petting me. Sweet man.

[Mom2legomaniacs]

Thanks for checking in. You know, we just worry about you. We care and we worry. Make sure that you continue to play it very safe please. Get lots of rest on your left side and keep lots of fluid going. You might be emotional right now, but you are also very smart and know what to do. Trust that. I am glad your dh is there now. Take care, okay!

[Mamagistra]

(((Aubrey))), you sweet little chick, you! Get thy feet up and resteth thyself until Monday. (Oh, and eateth much ice cream.) ;)

[gardenschooler]

Please take it easy until Monday, and if you have any more symptoms tomorrow, just go to the ER. Even though your midwife says she can't get you in to have tests until Monday, she can come and be with you at the hospital while they do.

 

I'm an alarmist, too. Just think about not waiting another day to find out what's going on if this happens again tomorrow, okay?

 

And please take Pam's advice, and Doran's. Lots of rest and movies. One long nap is what you need! Pretend you're on bedrest. No cleaning, no sewing, and no to those relatives. Make the whole world go away, and you just cozy up in bed.

 

Keep us posted. I don't want to hear any reports of you painting a kitchen tomorrow! (((Aubrey)))

[Karen in CO]

It is late and you should be in bed. You aren't signed on so that is good. Let us know how you are doing in the morning. Since you had two days with spotting. Spend today lying down - on your left side (I think that is what they told me). Drink lots of water - like a gallon today. I got dehydrated with all three of mine and spent from 3-6 weeks on bedrest with each.

 

Go back to bed. Rest and don't get up until your appointment tomorrow.

[Aubrey]

Please take it easy until Monday, and if you have any more symptoms tomorrow, just go to the ER. Even though your midwife says she can't get you in to have tests until Monday, she can come and be with you at the hospital while they do.

 

I'm an alarmist, too. Just think about not waiting another day to find out what's going on if this happens again tomorrow, okay?

 

And please take Pam's advice, and Doran's. Lots of rest and movies. One long nap is what you need! Pretend you're on bedrest. No cleaning, no sewing, and no to those relatives. Make the whole world go away, and you just cozy up in bed.

 

Keep us posted. I don't want to hear any reports of you painting a kitchen tomorrow! (((Aubrey)))

 

Well, my grandparents called right after my bro, lol, but they understood when I said no!

 

Now I'm up w/ a sick baby. :001_huh:

[Quiver0f10]

What really concerns me, though, is that *now* I am feeling a tad crampy, bloated, etc. And my back's been killing me for days.

 

I really hope you did call. Praying for you.

[Sue G in PA]

Just read your post and I'm praying for you. Please keep us updated, Aubrey. We're all very concerned! Hoping you went to the ER or a dr.

[LibraryLover]

Thinking about you.

[Aubrey]

((Aubrey))

 

I am deeply concerned by your midwife's responses - this is not the standard of care I have experienced or would expect.

 

The three worst case scenarios I can think of are: placental abruption, placenta previa, and pre-term labor... and any of these is an *emergency* situation. If I were you, I would consider getting this evaluated immediately - if necessary at an ER. Imho, you really should have an ultrasound asap to rule out the placenta issues.

 

Some questions:

 

Can you describe your low back pain in more detail?

 

When you are spotting, is the blood bright red?

 

Do you have a painful, bruise-like feeling anywhere on your abdomen?

 

Is the back pain affected at all by change in position or activity level?

 

 

Sweetheart, if you have a bruised spot and/or any symptoms of shock (even without spotting), get to an ER *immediately*, by ambulance if that would be faster. Abruptions aren't easy to spot, but they are a serious emergency.

 

Spotting, especially with possible contractions, is a red-flag for placenta previa (especially if you have had it before) - you *must* rest... go to bedrest status, do not have int*rcourse, and do not let anyone give you a v*ginal exam until you've had an ultrasound - exertion, intimacy, or internal exams can cause severe bleeding, or even an abruption if you have a pp. [You can have contractions with pp without being in preterm labor, aiui, it is fairly common.] If you do have pp, it could still resolve itself as the uterus expands, but since there are definite, serious precautions to be taking in the meantime, I would want to know for sure where things stand now.

 

PPrevia often shows itself with occasional, minor spotting of bright red blood - an abruption can show this way too if most of the bleeding gets trapped behind the placenta forming clots...

 

Some advice:

 

1) DO NOT EXERCISE!!! *please* Not while you are spotting and having low back pain. *rest* (if ice cream would be soothing, have ice cream, but **rest**) If you were just feeling down and icky, exercise could be fabulous, but right now it could be *dangerous*.

 

2) I would consider taking some Motherwort tincture - it is very calming and can calm/stop premature contractions.

 

3) Nettle and raspberry teas (I use one tea bag of each, some sweetening, and a double sized mug) can sooth an achy, crampy uterus (they are marvelous for menstrual cramps as well).

 

4) UTIs can have vague or generalized symptoms - nettle tea can help with this as well.. though I prefer cranberry capsules

 

5) Vitamin E can sometimes help if there is a threatened abruption - 1500 IUs (per day for up to 2 weeks) is the dose I've seen recommended [even better is the Vit E plus 50K IUs of vit A, 6K mg of C and 50 mg of zinc]

 

6) If you are in preterm labor, do keep in mind that outcomes are *much* better for the baby if a steroid shot is given at least 24 hours before delivery (48 is much better).

 

7) Even if you are way off on your dates, preterm labor is serious, and scary stuff. I don't want to scare you, but please do take it very seriously.

If I were you, I would read up carefully on all the possible signs of preterm labor (it is quite different sometimes from one's ordinary labor symptoms). I would also see how rest, and herbal remedies affected the back pain... but I would err really strongly on the side of caution. Hydration is essential with any labor scare - drink as much as you can, and make sure you stay well hydrated. [My midwife with the twins would come to our house and hook up IV fluids if I was having mild-possible preterm labor - she'd check fr dilation too, but you can't have that done at this point!]

 

 

I am very mellow in most areas - and a very passionate proponent of homebirths, natural care, low intervention, alternative treatments, etc, but your symptoms put you outside, *way* outside, my comfort zone for watchful waiting.

 

 

I'm so sorry I missed you original post - I've only been popping in occasionally and very briefly, so I know I'm missing a lot.

 

Keep us posted, honey! ... and take really good care of yourself... lots of rest, self-cherishing, calming thoughts and activities. I would have someone come in to help you with the kids until this is resolved if dh can't stay home with you. ...I tend to dismiss my own symptoms too, but forget about yourself, and focus on your *baby* (that kept me from hesitating when I needed to call about something during a pregnancy!).

 

Also, as an Orthodox Jew... DO NOT hesitate to call on Shabbos!! You are not causing us to 'break' Shabbos, because caring for one's patient's in a potentially serious situation is trump - always, unconditionally, absolutely. Chazal (our sages) teach that the mitzvos were given for us to *live* by them - and saving a life always takes precedence. (And we are *always* supposed to err on the side of caution on this, being stringent about Shabbos observance would be being careless with the obligation to save a life.) When our friends in the medical profession are on call, they have their pagers with them and on - and will leave shul in the middle of even the most important tefillos to respond to a page... it is a *religious* obligation. Never, ever hesitate because it is our Sabbath, okay? [if you need more vehement expostulations on the subject, let me know... I have more where that came from! ;)]

 

 

 

:grouphug:

 

You'll be in my thoughts and prayers, honey. Feel free to PM, email (eliana@efn.org), or to call (you can PM me for the number)

 

Eliana

 

Eliana, you're sweet. And just to clarify, my mw was very kind when I called. She has no idea that I think about whether or not it's Saturday. (I hesitated to call Fri night for the same reason, but as the sun was still up, I thought it would be *less* inconvenient.)

 

The blood is neither bright red nor continuous. It's old blood w/ mucus & not a lot. My back hurts the way it always hurts in the 3rd trimester--I'm 5'3" & my belly sticks out so far that by the end of things, I can't drive, lol. And I gain a ton of weight. I guess, to be more specific, I'd say it feels like my spine is being bent backward. And yes, it's worse if I sit in the floor & cut quilt squares or something like that. Actually, it's worst first thing in the morning. My hips are all out of joint, & my back aches, & I feel like I have to wait an hr for my parts to all figure out where they go. I forget what the chemical is that makes everything loose, but I'm sure it's just that.

 

I'm not having contractions. I was feeling kind-of bloated yesterday, & I know that contractions can start out feeling that way, so that made me nervous, & I'll bet being nervous & emotional didn't help any. *But* nothing came of it.

 

Honestly, I don't understand my mw's responses, but this type of thing has happened before. I suspect that it's a personality thing. I over-think stuff & worry, & when she finds out, she feels awful. She's very sweet, & if I'd told her how worried I was, she would be upset that I hadn't told her so. She did say that she could meet me yesterday, but I think she didn't insist for my sake, because she's so far away.

 

I know I sound like I'm defending her naively, but really, I've been to other mws, other OBs, & she is AWESOME by comparison. She has saved my life & my baby's on at least one occasion. Does that make her always right? No, but her approach to things tends to be more hands-off, & if you ask her about it, she always has really well-thought out reasons for the decision she's made. I just tend not to ask because I'm shy & embarrassed & worried about offending. She's completely the opposite, so she forgets that I'm that way. Over the years, I've gotten more comfortable & open w/ her, in person. Over the phone, I still feel... awkward. Kwim?

 

Ultimately, I've got a tiny bit of spotting. Not fresh blood. No other symptoms. Back pain, sure, but that's typical for this pt in pg, plus I've got scoliosis, etc. My back always hurts, lol. I *think* she's making her decision to wait *mainly* on the fact that when I called, I told her I didn't think this was a big deal. I *feel* fine. I'm not actually worried about it, it just falls under the list of things in the book that you're supposed to call about, & my imaginary friends (;)) unanimously said to call.

 

BUT, fwiw, THIS is why I can't use a hospital. I don't argue very well w/ medical professionals! When I met the mws in the hospital a couple of mos ago & felt bullied just on the first meeting, I knew it wouldn't work. My one good defense is to choose someone else. And my mw, since I've known her for so long now, is someone I *could* argue w/ if I really felt sure I needed to argue. But she doesn't put up much of a fight. She's very into women's knowledge of their own bodies, etc. Which is probably why I haven't gone in, see?

 

How's that for defensive? LOL! Sorry. I really, really appreciate you ladies, but I LOVE my mw so much, too, that I hate that this situation is making her look bad. It feels very unfair, because the last person you'd want to try to explain you is me!

 

Anyway, I'm feeling better today, & I think everything is fine. Have I said that? I always think that! I'm going to go check on dh now; he came home feeling a little off last night, & he doesn't look like he feels well this AM.

[Jennifer in MI]

Aubrey - I feel better reading your message today too! You sound so much more upbeat and positive about things. Please continue to take it easy until your appointment tomorrow. FWIW - I also homebirth, but this is something for which I would want an u/s to rule out the placenta previa.

 

Eliana - Are you a midwife? Your response is just so calm and rational and full of wonderful information. If you aren't, please consider it and then move next door to me!

[Aubrey]

Eliana,

 

I'm so glad you understand. As far as Sabbath goes, I understand that if I really need her, she *expects* me to call...I just want to be respectful of her time & family, etc. I want to make sure that, if I'm interrupting something, I really do need her. Kwim?

 

And she has given me almost the same list of suggestions, lol--yoga, skullcap, etc. for various things over the years. Her yoga speech actually starts, "I know you don't really want to try this, so I won't mention it, but..." I have trouble trying new things, apparently. Esp. when I'm pg. :blushing:

 

I don't know. I guess there's something anti-intellectual about worrying or seeming needy? So I tend to downplay exhibiting those (& other) emotions. Except here, apparently. :rolleyes:

 

Thanks for understanding, though. And the problem seems resolved today. I'm more peaceful, etc., too.

[Mom2legomaniacs]

I am so glad to hear you are better today. I've been wondering and thinking about you. We were gone all day. I checked right away to see! WHEW! Keep taking it easy though.