Coonection btwn "more challenging" child & birth?

[kbpaulie]

Curious.... Do you see any connetion btwn your more strong-willed/ challenging child and the birth process for them?

 

My 2nd son was an unplanned C-Section b/c he was a footling breech that we didn't know was in that awful position. I'd saw since the say he was born he was quite challenging. Crying regularlly when you changed his diapers to know at 4 having very strong anger outbursts. He also has speech challenges.

 

A friend of mine who was a massage therapist suggested that he rec'v CranioSacral Massage. That b/c he didn't have that compression in the canal the fluids in his brain and spinal column may not be right.

 

I'm wondering if there is truth to this or if this is just my son's strong personality.

 

Curious.... Do you see any connetion btwn your more strong-willed/ challenging child and the birth process for them?

[melissel]

In our case, not really. DD7 was my "every intervention short of c-section" birth, and she's very calm, easygoing, easy to please, goes with the flow. My DD4 was a very fast natural birth, after laboring in a tub, and she's very high maintenance, strong willed, impatient, etc.

[Laurie4b]

Curious.... Do you see any connetion btwn your more strong-willed/ challenging child and the birth process for them?

 

My 2nd son was an unplanned C-Section b/c he was a footling breech that we didn't know was in that awful position. I'd saw since the say he was born he was quite challenging. Crying regularlly when you changed his diapers to know at 4 having very strong anger outbursts. He also has speech challenges.

 

A friend of mine who was a massage therapist suggested that he rec'v CranioSacral Massage. That b/c he didn't have that compression in the canal the fluids in his brain and spinal column may not be right.

 

I'm wondering if there is truth to this or if this is just my son's strong personality.

 

Curious.... Do you see any connetion btwn your more strong-willed/ challenging child and the birth process for them?

 

None. In my case, it's inverse. The hardest labor was the first and he is pretty easy.

[OneRoomSchoolHouse]

All 3 of my dc's were c-sections. dd#1 and #2 were breach. dd#1 is very strong willed, hyper, talks constantly. dd#2 is super quiet and laid back. I don't see your connection here.

[Ginevra]

Yes. My dh and I both think this about our youngest ds. I had a full-term stillbirth with my third child. The next pregnancy (my little ds) I had to take heparin shots for blood-thinning. I worried incessantly that the shots could be harmful to the baby, but OTOH, so was clotty blood. In the last eight or so weeks of my pregnancy, there was a constant issue with low amniotic fluid and I was repeatedly put on and taken off of bed rest. He was induced 3 weeks pre-date due to very low amniotic fluid.

 

He has been a very challenging, emotional and frustration-prone child since he was a tiny baby. I think that these traits could represent a type of brain damage. He has never been dx'ed in that way, and no doctor has ever told me that, it's just a private belief of mine. He was tested several times for several different things (autism spectrum, celiac disease, diabetes, allergies, etc.), but all of those were assessed as "normal".

[LibraryLover]

LOL Anecdotally speaking, No Way. All of my births were at home. They were all lovely and gentle. One of my kids...........OH So Challenging! My most easy-going child is the one I didn't even birth!

[Amber in AUS]

I don't see any correlation in the birth process and behaviours in my kids.

[SilverMoon]

I can only think of one possible connection between my kids and their births. The only child that didn't get to come on her own timing, was the most difficult baby/toddler/preschooler of all five. She was born via scheduled cesarean two weeks before her due date. Labor started naturally with all of her siblings. The scheduled cesarean went very well, considering.

[dirty ethel rackham]

Nope. Ds16 was almost every intervention short of a c-section including an unnecessary vacuum extraction (can be very traumatic.) He has a very easy going nature. He was an easy baby.

 

Ds13 was a very relaxed, calm natural birth - easy birth. He was my most high need baby and the most strong-willed child.

 

Dd9 was a lightning fast, rollercoaster ride 2 hour from first inkling of a contraction to the birth and she is a very easy going child. A total dear.

[kbpaulie]

It's looking like there is a bigger connection here between birth order (2nd or last) and "stronger willed" children than delivery.

 

Guess God just made them all perfet for us with no rhyme or reason.:001_smile:

[Mandamom]

 

Guess God just made them all perfet for us with no rhyme or reason.:001_smile:

 

:iagree:

 

My hardest is my oldest daughter who had the longest labor and my next hardest is my youngest son who had the shortest labor which leaves my 2nd/middle child in the middle yet again. I had no complications with any of my deliveries.

 

That being said, my two stepsons were born by planned c-section with no complications and the younger is most like my 9 year old and the oldest is like my middle daughter. They all lived together for years and the personality differences were very interesting. They still are.

[Lilymax]

Not really, but I have heard that the mother's emotional state during her pregnancy can influence the baby's personality after birth. It's something about how prolonged exposure to mom's stress hormones rewires the way the baby processes stress after birth, making him/her more sensitive, fussier, etc.

 

This has definitely been true with my boys. We went through a lot of stress during my first pregnancy. He was born 4 weeks early due to preeclampsia (also a result of my stress, I'm sure) and was very high-needs, colicky, etc. He is still the most emotionally volatile of my kids. I've often described him as feeling everything more strongly than everyone else.

 

Life was super during my second pregnancy, and he is still a very laid-back, happy boy. Everyone has always commented on how fun he is to be around. He was a very easy baby.

 

Stress levels were up during my last pregnancy, but not as high as with the first. He is somewhere in the middle of his brothers, personality-wise. He's not colicky or high-needs, but he's definitely not as easily soothed and happy as my second child was. It'll be interesting to see his personality as he develops and see if it still holds true as it has for the other two.

[KarenNC]

Nope. The pig-headed gene is just dominant in my family, going a long way back.;)

[Rosy]

Not at all with my kids. My middle two were my most typical births, and my son (2nd born) is definitely the most difficult of my kids. Firstborn was the hardest labor and ended in a c-section and is my easiest (other than being firmly convinced that she's always right).

 

The stress-during-pregnancy factor didn't affect my kids either. I probably had the least stress with #2, who, again, is my most challenging. And I was probably most stressed with #3, who drives me batty sometimes but isn't particularly strong-willed.

 

I think there are so many factors that go into a child being difficult or easy. L&D may be a factor, but I think it's probably a very small one if it is.

[tenoraddict]

Totally! I have 3 sons and each of my pregnancies and L/D was different...and each one matched what ended up being their personalities. I've always thought it was kind of crazy, or maybe it was God's way of preparing me. ;) I don't think the L/D caused them to be who they are, but I've always found it interesting and humorous when I think about it.

[AnneC]

Nope. The pig-headed gene is just dominant in my family, going a long way back.;)

:iagree:

[Alenee]

:iagree: With those who are saying "nope". My challenging dd was born au-natural and makes me wanna tear my hear out 5 days out of 7! My dd who was 11 lbs. 4 oz., also au-natural but was squeezed to a near pulp on her way out and needed oxygen for 18 hours, is a doll...always joyful. My dd that had almost every intervention under the sun is the most laid-back chick in the house! :lol:

[Peela]

I cant see a connection here...my first, my easy going one, was a 3 day labour- although teh baby was never stressed during teh labour- she just took her own sweet time. My 2nd, my challenging one, was 90 minutes and easy, although there was muconium which suggests he did get stressed during the birth.

I have wondered if, being my 2nd, he didn't get the amount of nourishment my first did, as they are quite close together and I breastfed right through the pregnancy and afterwards. I was never short of milk, and he got all that first newborn milk, but he was skinny and I was also more stressed during the pregnancy with him....but, I guess I will never know. The birth itself though was easy for me.

[SquirrellyMama]

No, I don't see it here. My most difficult birth was my first and she is my calmest kid. I think I see birth order being more telling of how strong willed they are.

[RegGuheert]

Curious.... Do you see any connetion btwn your more strong-willed/ challenging child and the birth process for them?

Yes, I've often said there was a link between DS11's birth and his behavior...but in the past only privately to MomsintheGarden. Out of seven children, he was the only one who was baby-blanket blue when he was born. He was a very fussy baby and screamed incessantly as a toddler. He continues to be quite a difficult child. He is also perhaps the most intelligent child we have, so we are praying that he can reign in his behavior and take the most advantage of his gifts.

 

Yes, this is anecdotal evidence, but that does not mean the link is not there.

[Ginevra]

There goes that theory! :lol:

[RegGuheert]

There goes that theory! :lol:

*sigh* Another card-carrying member of MARGE (Mothers Against RegGuheert in Education), I presume? :D

[dirty ethel rackham]

Not really, but I have heard that the mother's emotional state during her pregnancy can influence the baby's personality after birth. It's something about how prolonged exposure to mom's stress hormones rewires the way the baby processes stress after birth, making him/her more sensitive, fussier, etc.

 

 

Interesting ... my most joyful child is the one where I was under THE most stress during pregnancy. I consider it a miracle she is still here due to the stress. Her older brother (the middle child) went through his horrible tantrum phase during that time (45 minute long, screaming bloody-murder tantrums - at least 5 of them a day.) We moved. The bridge loan fell through and we had to come up with $100K in cash to close on the new house in under 3 weeks. I wasn't sure I was going to survive.

 

This child is the most resilient little thing. She is sensitive, but not in a high need sort of way, but in a caring way, concerned about others' feelings.

[EKS]

My harder labor was with my challenging child. In one of the reports from his numerous evaluations, the evaluator suggested that he might have had some mild trauma at birth that was causing his difficulties.

[tenoraddict]

Totally! I have 3 sons and each of my pregnancies and L/D was different...and each one matched what ended up being their personalities. I've always thought it was kind of crazy, or maybe it was God's way of preparing me. ;) I don't think the L/D caused them to be who they are, but I've always found it interesting and humorous when I think about it.

I think I might not have answered your question, though... My most strong-willed child is the only one who was born without an epidural; he came too quickly, once he decided to come (he was a week late). My somewhat strong-willed child was a delightful delivery - only a few hours, but enough time for an epidural. My peaceful, compliant child was 1 week early, water broke without contractions, pitossin, 12 hour labor (5 hours w/no epidural), 2 hours of pushing, forceps delivery, born blue.

 

So, yes, I see a connection, but it's probably not the one you're looking for. My children perfectly fit the birth-order mold, and my 2 strong-willed ones are being tested for ADD/ADHD.

[mrs.m]

A friend of mine who was a massage therapist suggested that he rec'v CranioSacral Massage. That b/c he didn't have that compression in the canal the fluids in his brain and spinal column may not be right.

 

I'm wondering if there is truth to this or if this is just my son's strong personality.

 

 

 

I have three children by C-section. I don't really see that as a difficult birth. Twice it wasn't what I planned and the third time it was scheduled and still a joyous time for the family.

 

I think your friend is a massage therapist and has a vested interest in her theory. If that was the case, then all of my children should have some side effects of not having that compression. I see nothing to indicate that a c-section caused them to be stronger willed than the non c-section children out there. And with my sample of three, my middle child is the most laid-back and compliant child and had a very similar birth story to my first child.

 

I agree with many in this thread that the birth order is an influence in their personalities but even then my children break the mold on that theory as well.

Edited January 9, 2010 by jannylynn
typos

[dangermom]

My first daughter was a terrible birth, and an easy kid. Second daughter was much easier (planned c-section), and is certainly the more prickly personality. However, she is just like my sister.