Lovedtodeath Posted December 17, 2009 Share Posted December 17, 2009 At bedtime I brush her teeth, THEN breastfeed her, then put her to bed. Yep! Exactly right... I just lie to the dentist because they are ignorant about breastfeeding but like to give advice anyway.;) :D Hurray for mommy instincts! Yes! I'm all about the instincts. :) :) One reason I'm so passionate about the issue of looking at all options (even weaning if necessary) was because I was so dedicated to extended breastfeeding before that I almost let other's opinions of breastfeeding override my mommy instincts. All of the "facts" about breastfeeding had me truly convinced that my instincts were wrong. I see what you are saying there... Some (albeit few) mommies have even had to put their babies on formula because for some reason they had a lower quality of breast milk. I know one big thing that I did wrong with my first baby was offer the breast every time she cried. With all of the "feed on demand" advice out there I didn't realize that sometimes a baby is crying because she has a thread wrapped around her toe, or her tummy hurts for another reason, or she needs to go to sleep in a dark quiet place, or she is bored and wants your attention... etc. Sometimes it is good to stop and determine the reason for crying instead of plugging it up with suckling instincts every time you hear it. :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shusband Posted December 17, 2009 Share Posted December 17, 2009 All of my guys slimmed up alot once they started walking. They also all 3 jumped about 25 percentiles once I weaned them, no matter when that was. If it's important to you to continue nursing, I would try offering solid food before nursing and see how that goes. Summer ds6, ds4, ds3, ds9days Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
babysparkler Posted December 17, 2009 Share Posted December 17, 2009 I grew a couple of more inches after I was 18 though. I grew an inch or so around 18 too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terabith Posted December 17, 2009 Share Posted December 17, 2009 My youngest nursed until 3.5. I'm still sad about her weaning..... She will only drink cow's milk if it is heated a bit and mixed with a small amount of ovaltine. It makes it taste an awful lot like breast milk. Otherwise she won't touch it. I can't bring myself to complain too much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Margaret in GA Posted December 17, 2009 Share Posted December 17, 2009 My dds weigh started droppping off around 12-18 mos. I stopped bf her at about 13 mos. We confirmed that she had a lot of food allergies and I think that played a part. She fell off the growth chart and has always been tiny. She is turing 7 in February and she weighs 35 lbs. I'm not joking. My three year old weighs 33 pounds. The doctors ran all kinds of test, and they all came back normal. They did this for my oldest son (8yrs, 45 lbs.) also... same results. Completely healthy. The doctors have decided that it is genetic (I'm small, my ex-husband is small and East Indian - some people say this has a lot to do with it) and due to food allergies. Since dd has completed the milk desensitization and can now have milk, we expect her to gain weight. Alll this to say that it could be genetic, but I would let the doctors do the tests to make sure. I would also add calories to her diet to give her a boost. This did not work for my dd (she eats a lot of food, but doesn't gain much... people are surprised when they see how much she can eat), but it works for most people. My youngest had failure to thrive and the gastroentrologist recommended that I keep bf-ing but give him a mega bottle every evening. He started gaining weight after that and now at 10 yo he is very short and skinny for his age-- our two other kids are normal. He has been tested for allergies (scratch and blood) and showed no reaction, but since then we have taken him off dairy and noticed a huge difference (not in his weight, but in his attention span and stomach complaints). I do think his "allergy" or "sensitivity", whatever you want to call it makes him smaller than average. The doctors tell me there is no medical reason. Margaret Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Margaret in GA Posted December 17, 2009 Share Posted December 17, 2009 There's nothing in your breastmilk that would be preventing her from growing. Keep breastfeeding, offer lots of nutrient dense foods. (does she like nuts? Almonds? Eggs? Here's an article with some tips & lists of nutrient rich foods: http://www.askdrsears.com/html/3/T030800.asp - tip #15) Breastfeeding is ALWAYS worth it. Your child is getting valuable antibodies which protect her from viral & bacterial infections, & continued protection from developing allergies. Brain development is also linked to breastfeeding duration. As well, breastmilk continues to provide significant amounts of protein, fat & numerous vitamins and minerals in her diet. Breastfeeding until the 24 mos & beyond is biologically appropriate. unless he has a food sensitivity or allergy that is coming through that br-milk and not allowing the nutritious food to be absorbed. I think that the OP should go on an elimination diet if bf-ing is important to her. Margaret Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alte Veste Academy Posted December 17, 2009 Share Posted December 17, 2009 (edited) Sorry but the suggestion to keep nursing and NOT tell your pediatrician is terrible advice. :glare: Withholding information or lying to maintain your own agenda is not a good idea. How can her doctor properly recommend options and treat your daughter if you aren't telling him/her the truth? Well, in response to this, I will just say that I have had the same experience as CactusPair... I don't have a lot of faith in pediatricians' knowledge about kids and nutrition. I received enough bad advice, skepticism There are some great peds out there but honestly, there are just as many if not more who still have the same opinion of bf as the rest of the general population. I've had peds tell me ridiculous things about parenting, child development and nutrition that I flat out know are ridiculous because I read and keep up with these things, something I doubt the peds I've seen bother to do. Geez Louise, I had to leave the first ped we saw when we moved here because his tech told me that he calls CPS on parents who don't vaccinate. What?! That's crazy! It's not even illegal. I find it offensive and scary, even though I actually follow the vaccine schedule for my kids. As I stated in another post, I would actually seek another doctor that didn't knee-jerk blame bf. I somewhat flippantly typed the response about continuing to bf but not tell the doctor, a mistake I will try not to make again. Again, what I meant to say was that it is a non-starter for the ped to #1 suggestion out of the gate to tell OP to wean. No. Just no. I mean, really, #1? Not asking all the questions we moms have asked here? Was dd sick, has she been more active lately, do you sit down with her and feed her or let her self-feed, have you been giving high nutrient/calorie foods, etc. Any of these questions would be a better starting place than bam, she's dropped a little weight so you should wean. :confused: What does that say about him as a ped and his true opinion of bf? So, would I give a rat about discussing (bickering? disagreeing?) with him about something I know darn well is good for kiddo? Not worth my time or frustration and frankly, I have more respect for my own opinion in this matter than a ped who would start out making misguided assumptions. ETA: This rant not directed MissKNG but at the ped. For the record, I get that the advice to keep mum about continuing to bf is not ideal but again, I was being flippant and that wasn't exactly what was really floating around in my head (and there was a LOT floating around in my head at the time). Edited December 17, 2009 by Alte Veste Academy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amy g. Posted December 17, 2009 Share Posted December 17, 2009 Speaking of doctors and breastfeeding...Miss Bossy was hospitalized for a bladder infection when she was 4 months old. My doctor had been great about just keeping an eye on her weight, but the doctors at the hospital acted like I would not be allowed to take her home if they did not see her receiving formula and gaining weight. One doctor actually told me that I should enlarge the hole on the nipple and add rice cereal to her bottles of formula....for a four month old. Once we were home, I did call the hospital, and tell them that they might need to do a little continuing education on breastfeeding. They promised that they would address the problem, and said they were so glad that I knew better than to follow that kind of advice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slartibartfast Posted December 17, 2009 Share Posted December 17, 2009 I wouldn't lie but if my Ped was insistent I would ask for a referral to a nutritionist. I would probably get a new ped if it annoyed me too much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted December 18, 2009 Share Posted December 18, 2009 I would print out the kellymom page about breast milk for toddlers and make sure someone gets it, even if I put a different return address on it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lotsofpumpkins Posted December 18, 2009 Author Share Posted December 18, 2009 One thing I do know- when I take dd in a couple of weeks to re-weigh her (which, BTW, the ped didn't even suggest. Our old ped in NC would have said to come back in and re-weigh in a couple of weeks. This one said to wean her, give her vitamins, that's it), I'm going to put her in the same outfit/shoes she had on yesterday. That way I'll know that any weight gain/lost isn't from different clothes. I'm hoping she has gained some back by then. If she has lost more, then we will ask what the doctor suggests, but I know that if he suggests weaning again, then we will seek another opinion! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sahamamama Posted December 18, 2009 Share Posted December 18, 2009 The amount lost is probably a bit more than the 12 oz. The nurse even re-weighed her today, saying, she's supposed to gain weight, not lose it! IMO, 12 oz. is not something to worry about. My oldest must lose that much weight every morning when she poops, judging from the volume in the bowl. Your daughter is small by design. Sure, she "should" gain weight -- over the long-term -- but from month to month, children vary in their activity level, what they're eating, if they're feeling well, how much they sleep, and so on. You mentioned that she is teething & feverish, perhaps this has slowed down her overall appetite for the past few days? Honestly, all my girls are on the solid side, but whenever they have been teething, they all tend to get diarrhea and lose weight. FWIW, my niece was off-the-charts tiny for the first three years, but she has caught up (still skinny, but tall). If your daughter seems to be mentally sharp and physically active, I wouldn't worry about it. Do you really need to tell your doctor everything? Could you stop bfing an hour before you go in for a check-up and say with a straight face, "Oh, I've stopped bfing," then "start" again about 10 minutes after you leave? :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IsabelC Posted December 18, 2009 Share Posted December 18, 2009 Do you really need to tell your doctor everything? Could you stop bfing an hour before you go in for a check-up and say with a straight face, "Oh, I've stopped bfing," then "start" again about 10 minutes after you leave? :lol: I suspect that if you're contemplating deceiving the ped in any way, it would be better to find another medical adviser. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LindaOz Posted December 18, 2009 Share Posted December 18, 2009 Size is largely genetic. : I totally agree. My fifth child was 9lb 3oz at birth but then lost a lot and gained slowly. The nursing sister who was keeping a watch on dd's weight was saying there could be a health problem and I needed to go to a b/feeding clinic. Whaaat???? This was my fifth and I'd successfully fed all the others... I stayed away from that sister after that, didn't go to the feeding clinic and trusted my instinct which was that dd was fine but just small, and built like my dh's side of the family. This was supported by my obstetrician who basically said that the powers-that-be sometimes don't take into account family traits when they make these rules about weight gain etc. My dd is now 7, and still lightweight for her age. She was fine!!! :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissKNG Posted December 18, 2009 Share Posted December 18, 2009 Well, in response to this, I will just say that I have had the same experience as CactusPair... I'm sorry you had a bad experience and I completely understand that peds don't ALWAYS have perfect advice. I don't follow everything my ped suggests but his suggestions are based on what I tell him. So if you withhold or change information, his suggestions/medical advice won't be accurate -whether you decide to follow them or not. That's all I'm saying. What if the child has a medical condition? How can the doctor even begin suspect/diagnose that if you are telling him you are feeding her all solid foods when in fact, you are breast feeding? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Cindie2dds Posted December 18, 2009 Share Posted December 18, 2009 Just another person chiming in to say keep nursing. I can't imagine any doctor thinking cow's milk is better for your child than breast milk, no matter what age! My 3 year old eats like a teenage boy and still wears 2T; my oldest, who is almost 6, eats like a bird and wears a 7/8. Go figure. As long as she's an active, bright-eyed little girl, enjoy your little bean as long as you can. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted December 18, 2009 Share Posted December 18, 2009 Let us know how the weigh in goes.:grouphug: One thing I do know- when I take dd in a couple of weeks to re-weigh her (which, BTW, the ped didn't even suggest. Our old ped in NC would have said to come back in and re-weigh in a couple of weeks. This one said to wean her, give her vitamins, that's it), I'm going to put her in the same outfit/shoes she had on yesterday. That way I'll know that any weight gain/lost isn't from different clothes. I'm hoping she has gained some back by then. If she has lost more, then we will ask what the doctor suggests, but I know that if he suggests weaning again, then we will seek another opinion! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted December 18, 2009 Share Posted December 18, 2009 I'm sorry you had a bad experience and I completely understand that peds don't ALWAYS have perfect advice. I don't follow everything my ped suggests but his suggestions are based on what I tell him. So if you withhold or change information, his suggestions/medical advice won't be accurate -whether you decide to follow them or not. That's all I'm saying. What if the child has a medical condition? How can the doctor even begin suspect/diagnose that if you are telling him you are feeding her all solid foods when in fact, you are breast feeding? The only scenario in which a doctor would need to know is if the mother is on medications. Cow's milk will be just as detrimental to a child's health (and likely more detrimental) than breastmilk, and he was recommending that as part of the child's diet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissKNG Posted December 18, 2009 Share Posted December 18, 2009 The only scenario in which a doctor would need to know is if the mother is on medications. Cow's milk will be just as detrimental to a child's health (and likely more detrimental) than breastmilk, and he was recommending that as part of the child's diet. I understand that but that wasn't my point. My point was lying to your ped is not helpful if you expect/hope for accurate medical advice from him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terabith Posted December 18, 2009 Share Posted December 18, 2009 Don't lie. But if they ask for a food list, just say "milk." Honestly, I think breastmilk should be the standard anyway, esp with toddlers. Cow's milk should have the modifier of cow. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted December 18, 2009 Share Posted December 18, 2009 The thing about breastfeeding is that it is always to blame. Baby is skinny? It must be breastfeeding. Baby is chubby? It must be breastfeeding. Baby doesn't sleep? It must be breastfeeding. Baby sleeps a lot? It must be breastfeeding. Baby spits up a lot? They don't do that with formula, right? :001_huh: Baby is clingy? Oh yeah. It must be breastfeeding. Nevermind that your babies cousin who is bottlefed is also clingy, since it is a developmental stage... :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spy Car Posted December 19, 2009 Share Posted December 19, 2009 The thing about breastfeeding is that it is always to blame. Baby is skinny? It must be breastfeeding. Baby is chubby? It must be breastfeeding. Baby doesn't sleep? It must be breastfeeding. Baby sleeps a lot? It must be breastfeeding. Baby spits up a lot? They don't do that with formula, right? :001_huh: Baby is clingy? Oh yeah. It must be breastfeeding. Nevermind that your babies cousin who is bottlefed is also clingy, since it is a developmental stage... Yea, what's that about? I do not understand this sort of thinking. I do not. At all. Bill Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
babysparkler Posted December 19, 2009 Share Posted December 19, 2009 The thing about breastfeeding is that it is always to blame. Baby is skinny? It must be breastfeeding. Baby is chubby? It must be breastfeeding. Baby doesn't sleep? It must be breastfeeding. Baby sleeps a lot? It must be breastfeeding. Baby spits up a lot? They don't do that with formula, right? :001_huh: Baby is clingy? Oh yeah. It must be breastfeeding. Nevermind that your babies cousin who is bottlefed is also clingy, since it is a developmental stage... :D You are so right :huh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted December 19, 2009 Share Posted December 19, 2009 Yea, what's that about? I do not understand this sort of thinking. I do not. At all. Bill In my opinion? It's about misogyny. A mom couldn't *possibly* know more about feeding babies than medical professionals/companies that make *millions* off of scientifically designed formula. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted December 19, 2009 Share Posted December 19, 2009 I understand that but that wasn't my point. My point was lying to your ped is not helpful if you expect/hope for accurate medical advice from him. I do agree with this. I know it's hard for some people to stand up to doctors but that's what you need to do. You need to say "whether or not I breastfeed my child is a parenting decision, not a medical decision. When I want parenting advice from you, I will ask for it." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted December 19, 2009 Share Posted December 19, 2009 I do agree with this. I know it's hard for some people to stand up to doctors but that's what you need to do. You need to say "whether or not I breastfeed my child is a parenting decision, not a medical decision. When I want parenting advice from you, I will ask for it."Well, the doctor also needs to know that his medical decision is in error.;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted December 19, 2009 Share Posted December 19, 2009 Well, the doctor also needs to know that his medical decision is in error.;) Well, yes, in this case. In general though, I'd draw a firm line in the sand about what types of advice I would be willing to accept. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom-ninja. Posted December 19, 2009 Share Posted December 19, 2009 Any opinions on this? Dr. is not knowledgeable about nursing. Will cutting back on the nursing and making her hungrier for solid food help? No. is it possible my milk isn't "as good" as it was? No. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
musicianmom Posted December 19, 2009 Share Posted December 19, 2009 The thing about breastfeeding is that it is always to blame. Baby is skinny? It must be breastfeeding. Baby is chubby? It must be breastfeeding. Baby doesn't sleep? It must be breastfeeding. Baby sleeps a lot? It must be breastfeeding. Baby spits up a lot? They don't do that with formula, right? :001_huh: Baby is clingy? Oh yeah. It must be breastfeeding. Nevermind that your babies cousin who is bottlefed is also clingy, since it is a developmental stage.. Sort of like homeschooling is always to blame, but I digress. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanne Posted December 19, 2009 Share Posted December 19, 2009 Personally, I would wean her breast milk feeds gradually and increase her solid intake and see what happens. Sorry but the suggestion to keep nursing and NOT tell your pediatrician is terrible advice. :glare: Withholding information or lying to maintain your own agenda is not a good idea. How can her doctor properly recommend options and treat your daughter if you aren't telling him/her the truth? I'm pretty skeptical when it comes to doctors, breastfeeding, sleeping and discipline advice. But I do agree that nutrition, weight gain and feeding issues need to be candidly discussed with a competent medical professional. I'm surprised that *more* breastfeeding (in contrast to the quote above) has not been mentioned (or often) in this thread. 4 times a day is not a lot for a toddler. I'd increase both solid food offers (and I'd make those whole, real, family foods) AND I'd increase offering the breast. However, I'm of the mind it's most likely the genetic make up of the OP's child. Eariler in the thread, a mom mentioned starting rice cereal and/or solids at 4 months. I just want to mention this is against currently understood medical guidelines for babies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stripe Posted December 19, 2009 Share Posted December 19, 2009 (edited) One doctor actually told me that I should enlarge the hole on the nipple and add rice cereal to her bottles of formula....for a four month old. When I was sitting in aptly named waiting room the ER with my child recently, I got to hear a lot from a young woman sitting next to me with a newborn with a fever and irritability and constipation. I can't remember exactly how old he was, but I'm almost positive he was less than 1 mo. The new mom told the older ladies sitting near her all about the birth, and then (after they left) started discussing his bowel habits with me. Anyhoo, she eventually got around to telling me that she was supplementing him with cereal because formula just "wasn't enough" for him. I have no clue if she was told this or came up with it on her own. I was honestly too shocked to say anything. Then again, someone recently agreed with me that it's really not a crisis if you are not "prepared" for the baby's birth because all you need is some diapers, and you can get the rest later. She piped up to "remind" me (not!) that the hospital gives you a 2 day supply of formula. Another shocked moment! Edited December 19, 2009 by stripe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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