Does anyone else ever feel restless? (cc)

[*********]

I don't know what's up with me.

 

I have a great life. Very blessed. I get to stay home and be a housewife, homeschool my kids, do the mommy thing.

 

My dh is great. Very loving, provides well for us.

 

I have a great relationship with the Lord.

 

I have no reason to complain.

 

So why do I feel restless? Why do I feel like, I dunno. Nothing really matters. Nothing's good or bad, it just. Is.

 

I just turned 32. Not old, not young. (forgive me here please, if you disagree either way :)). Everything's just so....

 

Bland. Rut-ish. Same old, same old.

 

What am I doing wrong? I feel like I'm missing out on something else the Lord has for me.

 

Ugh, now I just sound like a rambling silly. :tongue_smilie:

 

Maybe it's just pms...

 

What do you do when you feel this way?

[LauraGB]

I have felt that way for at least the last 5 years.

 

Trouble is, so much of my life is dedicated to everyone else, I'm not even remotely sure I would do to relieve the restlessness even if I could.

 

Gosh. That sounds pathetic!

 

ETA - its been especially bad for the past 2 years. Every day is like Groundhog day around here. I repeat the same things to the same people and do the same things myself...every day.

Edited November 23, 2009 by LauraGB

[Sputterduck]

Yes. If you feel that way, God may be calling you to something. I am called to missions and the restlessness was really bad when I wasn't heading into that. Now that I am following my calling, I feel much better. :)

[*********]

Yes. If you feel that way, God may be calling you to something. I am called to missions and the restlessness was really bad when I wasn't heading into that. Now that I am following my calling, I feel much better. :)

 

See, this is what I've been getting.

 

God's calling me to something.

 

But what? What is it that I"m supposed to be doing that I'm not? I mean, between dh's health issues of late, and four kids, and, well, you know, life, we're pretty busy already!

 

So why do I feel like there's something missing?

[dragons in the flower bed]

What do you do when you feel this way?

 

Take a day to do something completely different from usual, so your regular life feels fresh again.

 

Alternatively, make life harder. Start a project. Learn something new. Switch from store-bought yogurt to homemade, from disposables to cloth, from pants sometimes to skirts always, or whatever. The idea is to up the ante, get crunchier, more biblical, more frugal, whatever your kick is.

[The Governess]

I have felt that way before. I have learned that I need to have things to look forward to. I also need to feel like I am moving forward, and accomplishing something. So, I put fun things on my calendar: a new movie or book coming out that I want to see/read, a girl's night with friends, a date night with dh, a weekend trip or longer vacation to plan, etc. Even if it's just one thing a month it is something outside of the day-to-day and helps break things up for me.

 

I have a list of "life-long goals" as well. I want to learn to: be a good photographer, a great cook, a good mother and wife. I want to learn Latin and Mandarin. I want to travel to every continent and add some perspective to my worldview. I would love to take some deep theology classes, and participate in a non-profit. Etc. There are so many things that I am excited to learn about. I try to have a book or project on online class/research going all the time so I feel like I am accomplishing some of my goals rather than just helping everyone else in my family accomplish theirs.

 

These things help ease the "restlessness" for me. :grouphug:

[*********]

Take a day to do something completely different from usual, so your regular life feels fresh again.

 

Alternatively, make life harder. Start a project. Learn something new. Switch from store-bought yogurt to homemade, from disposables to cloth, from pants sometimes to skirts always, or whatever. The idea is to up the ante, get crunchier, more biblical, more frugal, whatever your kick is.

 

Hmmm. Interesting.

 

I don't have a mom (long story), so I don't have anyone to ask these sort of 'life' questions of. So I come here. :001_smile:

 

I could really use a Titus 2 woman irl as a friend, ya know?

[elegantlion]

.

 

Trouble is, so much of my life is dedicated to everyone else, I'm not even remotely sure I would do to relieve the restlessness even if I could.

 

 

 

Yes, I feel that way. A few years ago it was because of the above. I realized nothing I did was mine alone. Sadly I had no hobbies that I could call my own. So after years away from it I turned back to writing. Most of the time it fulfills my need. My family understands that it is important to me and allows me time to pursue it.

[Sputterduck]

See, this is what I've been getting.

 

God's calling me to something.

 

But what? What is it that I"m supposed to be doing that I'm not? I mean, between dh's health issues of late, and four kids, and, well, you know, life, we're pretty busy already!

 

So why do I feel like there's something missing?

 

Well, did you ask Him what it is? If an answer doesn't come right away keep your heart and your eyes open and it'll pop up.

[The Governess]

Yes. If you feel that way, God may be calling you to something. I am called to missions and the restlessness was really bad when I wasn't heading into that. Now that I am following my calling, I feel much better. :)

 

This is something to consider. What are the desires of your heart? What things, if you didn't get a chance to do them, would cause you to feel like you hadn't fully lived your life and used the gifts God had given you? I truly feel that God calls us to use our talents to honor him in ways that bring us joy. What brings you joy?

[astrid]

OT, but what's a "Titus 2 woman?"

 

Just wondering; never heard the term.

 

astrid

[OnTheBrink]

Conversely, restlessness could also be temptation to be dissatisfied with your life and the ministry you currently have to your husband and children. If you have family that truly needs you at this time, the temptation to find something else to do, even something good, could be the wrong thing, kwim? Satan's attacks at the family aren't always malicious-looking.

 

Not saying that's the situation with you, just throwing it out there for thought.

[OnTheBrink]

OT, but what's a "Titus 2 woman?"

 

Just wondering; never heard the term.

 

astrid

 

Titus is a book of the new testament and the second chapter talks about the older women mentoring the younger women to take care of their homes and families and not be scurrying about being busybodies.

[AuntieM]

What do you do when you feel this way?

 

I try to exercise my creative side, like painting and writing. This seems to help the most.

 

I get involved in a volunteer project benefiting someone whose circumstances are different (perhaps not as fortunate) as mine.

 

I get outdoors more.

 

I try to up the exercise more.

 

I imagine what it will be like when the kids are grown up. That one can go either way, depending on how the day's been! ;)

 

Finally, I watch and pray. I find that God has used these times in my life to draw me closer to Himself.

 

:grouphug: to you.

[astrid]

Oh, well, yes, I knew it was a book of the Bible, and basically the gist of the chapter, but I guess I was thinking it was some kind of organized group--- like "Girl Scouts" but for grownups, KWIM? :001_smile:

 

Astrid

[Jean in Newcastle]

I start each morning asking God what He would have me to do that day. Of course, much of it is routine but there are the "interruptions" that come from friends, family and neighbors. I've learned to stop and listen to these interruptions. I then evaluate - is this person in need? Then depending on the immediacy of the need, I try to do what I can. It may be a lonely neighbor who keeps calling. I will try to schedule a time to go and visit them.. . . (Just one idea of how God can use a busy SAHM).

[OnTheBrink]

Oh, well, yes, I knew it was a book of the Bible, and basically the gist of the chapter, but I guess I was thinking it was some kind of organized group--- like "Girl Scouts" but for grownups, KWIM? :001_smile:

 

Astrid

 

 

LOL, I see. No, as far as I know, there is no formal group. My church has a Titus 2 bible study for women, but we don't earn badges by keeping our houses clean or baking cookies. LOL Mostly it's a discussion group with a mix of women from college age up through women in their 80's.

[Sputterduck]

Conversely, restlessness could also be temptation to be dissatisfied with your life and the ministry you currently have to your husband and children. If you have family that truly needs you at this time, the temptation to find something else to do, even something good, could be the wrong thing, kwim? Satan's attacks at the family aren't always malicious-looking.

 

Not saying that's the situation with you, just throwing it out there for thought.

 

She said she feels a calling, though, and you have to be really careful not to discourage people from following a calling. So many people delay and it means trouble in their life. If God is calling her, God is calling her. There is no reason to suggest satan is making her discontent.

[UnPrairieMuffin]

I don't think you're missing on anything God has for you. Obviously, you can only do what is set before you, and you should try your best at the task at hand (motherhood, wifedom etc.). I think restlessness and blandness are normal things to feel, I wouldn't go around looking for some ambiguous "calling" just to make you feel better about the boredom you feel. Lots of people would love to be in your place; being married to a good provider is not the norm, unfortunately, and homeschooling for many is seen as a priviledge due to circumstances, etc. You have a lot to be thankful for. God has blessed you, and perhaps instead of looking for something to make you feel less bored/restless you ought to cultivate some thankfulness instead.

 

Also, perhaps you're thinking too much. If you're really unhappy with your status quo, then find some new things to enhance it. New recipes? New furniture arrangement? I don't know what floats your boat, but I think if you get busy, you might have less feelings of restlessness and more of contentment.

 

Maybe you don't need to go far to stop thinking about your own stuff, perhaps your neighbor could use a pan of brownies or a friend at church with the flu could use a pot of soup.

 

I find 99.9% of the time when I'm restless and discontent if I focus on somebody outside my immediate sphere then I feel better. Consider it giving the Jesus in your heart feet.

 

Hth,

ERin

Edited November 23, 2009 by UnPrairieMuffin
run-ons!

[staceyobu]

Yes. I've felt like that a lot lately. I left my career as an ob nurse two years ago and still miss it a lot. Of course, when I was working, I was crying every day I had to work because I missed the kids. I had a brief moment of wanting to go back to school and take prereqs to apply to med school... I may still be having that brief moment.

 

I'm wondering if it's a case of "the grass is always greener"...

[Crimson Wife]

I think it's fairly common for moms of medium-to-large families to get so caught up in the day-to-day minutiae that we lose sight of the "big picture".

 

Have you read Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World?

[OnTheBrink]

She said she feels a calling, though, and you have to be really careful not to discourage people from following a calling. So many people delay and it means trouble in their life. If God is calling her, God is calling her. There is no reason to suggest satan is making her discontent.

 

I believe feelings can be deceptive and I don't believe in "callings" per se. So many people follow "callings" that end up as disasters because they got so wrapped up in being "called" that they ignored what the more important issues in their lives were. Your Christian experience isn't everyone's and I have every reason to offer an alternative perspective.

[Sputterduck]

I don't think you're missing on anything God has for you. Obviously, you can only do what is set before you, and you should try your best at the task at hand (motherhood, wifedom etc.). I think restlessness and blandness are normal things to feel, I wouldn't go around looking for some ambiguous "calling" just to make you feel better about the boredom you feel. Lots of people would love to be in your place; being married to a good provider is not the norm, unfortunately, and homeschooling for many is seen as a priviledge due to circumstances, etc. You have a lot to be thankful for. God has blessed you, and perhaps instead of looking for something to make you feel less bored/restless you ought to cultivate some thankfulness instead.

 

Also, perhaps you're thinking too much. If you're really unhappy with your status quo, then find some new things to enhance it. New recipes? New furniture arrangement? I don't know what floats your boat, but I think if you get busy, you might have less feelings of restlessness and more of contentment.

 

Maybe you don't need to go far to stop thinking about your own stuff, perhaps your neighbor could use a pan of brownies or a friend at church with the flu could use a pot of soup.

 

I find 99.9% of the time when I'm restless and discontent if I focus on somebody outside my immediate sphere then I feel better. Consider it giving the Jesus in your heart feet.

 

Hth,

ERin

 

 

I'm sorry but that's a little creepy. How do you know what plans God has for this woman and her family? Stop thinking? Seriously?

 

*shudder*

 

Families like hers do amazing things all the time when they are following God's calling.

[JudoMom]

She said she feels a calling, though, and you have to be really careful not to discourage people from following a calling. So many people delay and it means trouble in their life. If God is calling her, God is calling her. There is no reason to suggest satan is making her discontent.

 

SolaMichella a legimate point. One also needs to be just as careful when encouraging a person to follow a calling, because if that person doesn't have a calling, encouraging them to pursue could lead to trouble in their life.

[OnTheBrink]

How do you know what plans God has for this woman and her family?

 

The same question can be asked of you. And, your *shuddering* is rude. This is a real woman who's asked for perspectives and has gotten some. I don't recall seeing anywhere that she asked you to personally chastise those who don't agree with your perspective on her life.

[Sputterduck]

SolaMichella a legimate point. One also needs to be just as careful when encouraging a person to follow a calling, because if that person doesn't have a calling, encouraging them to pursue could lead to trouble in their life.

 

Okay but when someone has a calling, it's a calling. It always makes me go :001_huh: when a Christian says they don't believe in callings. But maybe that's because I have one and there is no other feeling like it. It's not something you can shake, but it is something some people fight. It does boggle my mind that some Christians don't feel like God has a plan for their life. It truly boggles the mind.

[Sputterduck]

The same question can be asked of you. And, your *shuddering* is rude. This is a real woman who's asked for perspectives and has gotten some. I don't recall seeing anywhere that she asked you to personally chastise those who don't agree with your perspective on her life.

 

I can shudder when a someone tells someone to think less. That is Creepy... especially considering the no longer quivering stuff we've been talking about...

[JudoMom]

Usually when I feel restless it's because I'm forgetting to look for the joy, and it comes around to me being discontent.

 

I'm a wife and a homeschooling Mom. My days are all going to be a variation on a theme. Cook, teach, clean, rinse, repeat. This can become mundane, or I can look for the joy in the cooking, the cleaning, and the teaching, and even the rinsing and repeating.

 

Everything you do matters. Everything I do matters. Every piece of clothing I wash shows my family love. Every meal I cook gives me an opportunity to serve them. Every lesson I teach gives me the chance to impact their minds. Every interaction I have with them gives me the opportunity to show them the love of Christ, in addition to the love I have for them as their mother.

[*********]

Usually when I feel restless it's because I'm forgetting to look for the joy, and it comes around to me being discontent.

 

I'm a wife and a homeschooling Mom. My days are all going to be a variation on a theme. Cook, teach, clean, rinse, repeat. This can become mundane, or I can look for the joy in the cooking, the cleaning, and the teaching, and even the rinsing and repeating.

 

Everything you do matters. Everything I do matters. Every piece of clothing I wash shows my family love. Every meal I cook gives me an opportunity to serve them. Every lesson I teach gives me the chance to impact their minds. Every interaction I have with them gives me the opportunity to show them the love of Christ, in addition to the love I have for them as their mother.

 

Ah, yes.

 

I think it's this. :001_smile:

[Sputterduck]

Usually when I feel restless it's because I'm forgetting to look for the joy, and it comes around to me being discontent.

 

I'm a wife and a homeschooling Mom. My days are all going to be a variation on a theme. Cook, teach, clean, rinse, repeat. This can become mundane, or I can look for the joy in the cooking, the cleaning, and the teaching, and even the rinsing and repeating.

 

Everything you do matters. Everything I do matters. Every piece of clothing I wash shows my family love. Every meal I cook gives me an opportunity to serve them. Every lesson I teach gives me the chance to impact their minds. Every interaction I have with them gives me the opportunity to show them the love of Christ, in addition to the love I have for them as their mother.

 

I would totally think that may be the case with her, except when the calling thing came up it struck a chord with her. There was a speaker at church once who talked about husbands and wife couples he knew who were just living their suburban life and ignoring their calling. Many people are called to that life, for sure, but some are not and they continue to live as if they were because it's the status quo.

 

I tried actively to question my calling for awhile and I never could shake the pulling in my heart. Now that I've started doing missions, I can see that it was a sin to not do it for so long. If you are letting God lead your life, you need to let God lead your life and not strive to be the status quo.

 

I do think it interesting that people on this thread would likely encourage a woman who told them that they feel called to homeschool their children. Just because one person doesn't have a calling to do something other than cook, clean, teach, and be a mom and wife, doesn't mean that someone else doesn't. I'm not telling anyone they don't have a calling beyond that just because I do. Don't tell someone they don't just because you don't. The theme here should be Ask God And Get On With What He Says.

 

"I don't think you're missing on anything God has for you." and "perhaps you're thinking too much." shouldn't be said. Encourage the woman to follow God. Period.

[OnTheBrink]

I can shudder when a someone tells someone to think less. That is Creepy... especially considering the no longer quivering stuff we've been talking about...

 

This thread isn't about the no longer quivering issue. AFAIK, Bethany isn't in that situation.

 

And, as someone who tends to overthink things, I see nothing "Creepy" about telling someone to relax and focus on what's on her plate at the moment. I overthink situations all the time and have people tell me to shut my brain off for a bit and just relax. I didn't see anyone tell Bethany to not think at all.

 

Here's where I'm am on "callings." I've seen too many people use that as an excuse to bail on the work God has given them at the moment, to pursue their own greater glory, but disguised as a "calling." I'm not saying God doesn't want specific people to do specific things, but I do not agree that God calls a woman from her family's needs to pursue something else, regardless of how good it might appear to be. A woman's biggest and most important ministry is her family. I'm not saying that has to look like June Cleaver or a Stepford wife, but I think it's easy for women to become discontent and feel her life has no real purpose when her days are spent schooling, cleaning, cooking, etc. There's no outward reward for that job, really. No paycheck, no promotions, no annual award ceremonies. So, when a woman says she's restless in her life, I encourage her to look at both sides of the reasons for that restlessness and figure out for herself the cause of it and prayerfully seek God's guidance for how to remedy it. I sure don't slap a "oh, it's God calling you to do something else" on it any more than I slap a "oh, it's definitely satan!" on it. There's nothing wrong with looking at both sides of a situation. Ultimately, what Bethany does is between her and God and her own conscience, either way.

[*********]

Conversely, restlessness could also be temptation to be dissatisfied with your life and the ministry you currently have to your husband and children. If you have family that truly needs you at this time, the temptation to find something else to do, even something good, could be the wrong thing, kwim? Satan's attacks at the family aren't always malicious-looking.

 

Not saying that's the situation with you, just throwing it out there for thought.

 

This is very true, Michelle.

 

I appreciate you having the courage to say so.

 

This very well could be all that it is.

[Colleen in NS]

So why do I feel restless?

 

I just turned 32. Not old, not young.

 

What am I doing wrong? I feel like I'm missing out on something else the Lord has for me.

 

What do you do when you feel this way?

 

God's calling me to something.

 

But what? What is it that I"m supposed to be doing that I'm not?

 

You *are* young (and I mean that in a complimentary way, not condescending). :D You've just turned the corner from your 20s, and you have two young children (and a couple of older stepchildren? Did you get married in your mid-20s?). I'm guessing that your current life is different from your life of 10 years ago, when you had just left your teen years.

 

I think the restless feeling is normal, esp. when you have young kids and esp. if you had an adult life before getting married and having children. I was a very active "Christian missionary" for years before I got married and had children, and I'm very well acquainted with that restless feeling!! :) I have felt time and again like there is "something else" that I should be doing - something BIG - but have never felt really OK to pursue something BIG, because I have a family to care for. So I do smaller things like reading, studying new ideas, rearranging furniture, figuring out money saving ideas, crafting, etc..

 

If circumstances allowed, I might do something volunteerish that I enjoyed like rocking babies at the children's hospital or training to be a volunteer doula - but I can't right now for various reasons. Maybe you could find some little thing to do, that you really enjoy? Craft with a friend? Make crafts for some organization? Volunteer an hour or two a week somewhere? Sometimes those things can give you the feeling that you are "involved" in something outside of your everyday life.

[JudoMom]

Encourage the woman to follow God. Period.

 

You are making a lot of assumptions.

 

I shared my experience with her. Others shared their experiences with her.

 

I am encouraging her to follow God, as are others.

 

You don't know her and/or her calling any better than anyone else on this board and to assume your answer is the correction one is arrogant.

 

Period.

Edited November 23, 2009 by JudoMom

[JudoMom]

Ah, yes.

 

I think it's this. :001_smile:

 

A wonderful book on contentment is "Calm My Anxious Heart" by Linda Dillow. :grouphug:

[Sputterduck]

Here's where I'm am on "callings." I've seen too many people use that as an excuse to bail on the work God has given them at the moment, to pursue their own greater glory, but disguised as a "calling." I'm not saying God doesn't want specific people to do specific things, but I do not agree that God calls a woman from her family's needs to pursue something else, regardless of how good it might appear to be.

 

Following a "calling" that glorifies oneself is sin and not a calling.

 

Bailing on the work God has given a person is exactly what ignoring a calling is.

 

God does not call a woman from her family's needs and I would be the first person to think a woman is sinning by doing so.

[Sputterduck]

You are making a lot of assumptions.

 

I shared my experience with her. Others shared their experiences with her.

 

I am encouraging her to follow God, as are others.

 

You don't know her and/or her calling any better than anyone else on this board and to assume your answer is the correction one is arrogant.

 

Period.

 

She said "See, this is what I've been getting.

 

God's calling me to something."

 

So, no, I'm not assuming anything about her. She said she feels God is calling her to something, so I will assume that that is true.

[JudoMom]

She said "See, this is what I've been getting.

 

God's calling me to something."

 

So, no, I'm not assuming anything about her. She said she feels God is calling her to something, so I will assume that that is true.

 

God could just as well be calling her to find the joy and contentment in the circumstances in which He's placed her.

[Sputterduck]

God could just as well be calling her to find the joy and contentment in the circumstances in which He's placed her.

 

Exactly. Which is why she needs to ask Him what to do. He will have the perfect answer for her.

[*********]

Sputterduck, maybe I spoke too quickly.

 

I don't really know what it is.

 

I just wanted to know that I'm not the only one who has ever felt this way.

 

And I wanted to know how others have handled this feeling.

[Colleen in NS]

I also meant to say "you are young, and you probably still have a ton of energy - mental and physical, and when raising young children, it's the physical that gets used up while the mental can sometimes be revving its engine while stalled." That can make me restless and feel like I'm missing out on something.

[lionfamily1999]

Our church recently did an 'inventory' of spiritual gifts. What amazed me was how more collected and "right" I felt once I knew where my strengths were and had concrete things to do with them.

 

Maybe something like that could help?

 

Also... some choice reading in the greatest book ever written with some heart to hearts with the author always helps ;)

[Sputterduck]

Sputterduck, maybe I spoke too quickly.

 

I don't really know what it is.

 

I just wanted to know that I'm not the only one who has ever felt this way.

 

And I wanted to know how others have handled this feeling.

 

LOL Okay then. :) Well, I think sitting down and having a good long talk with God is a good idea. I think God has a plan for everyone. Ask him what yours is. If you are already on that plan, then that is awesome!

 

eta: I flapped in the wind for years before getting on with God's plan. I would hate for anyone else to do that if they could avoid it!

Edited November 23, 2009 by Sputterduck

[KrissiK]

I feel that way a lot. When I was single (I married later in life at age 34) I'd just... move. Once I moved (totally spur of the moment, literally the principal called me at 6:30am and I said, "yes" and in 5 months I was there) to Sao Paulo, Brazil and taught in a missionary school for 2 years. Then I moved to the Bay Area and taught in a Christian school for 3 years. And then... I started grad school and then moved back to where I grew up, fell in love, got married and started our family. And now... here I am. I think some of it is itchy feet. Some of it is discontent. For me... it helps to do something a little different. Obviously, I have responsibilities now, so I can't just pick up and move like I used to do, so I have to take up a new hobby (baking or sewing) or sometimes I'll just research a place I'd like to move to. It's not quite as good as actually moving there, but it's less permanent, too.;) I don't know what to tell you. Some people do really dumb things when they feel that way. Our neighbor dumped her husband for an old flame she hooked up on Facebook. She was just "bored" she gave as her reason to give up on her marriage.

[milovany]

God could just as well be calling her to find the joy and contentment in the circumstances in which He's placed her.

 

I am wondering if this might be the case too, although I have NO idea about another dear sister's life. It can certainly be one's calling to remain content where they are; a "calling" doesn't have to be an outside ministry opportunity.

 

I'm developing a similar reaction to "callings" as some have mentioned here. My husband and I wholeheartedly 100% believed we were "called" to a certain ministry; for several years we worked hard at and loved it. But we also wondered why it wasn't really growing much. We had relationship with the people we were ministering to, but we had dreams to do "this" and ideas to do "that" and those things never developed. We were willing to give more of ourselves, go places so we could bless these people, etc. but it didn't go far.

 

We've had a major change in our spiritual life this past year, and now we are not even working in that ministry at all. We're so much more peaceful and content, trusting what God is doing. There is so much God wants to do IN us, you know? To me, that's our calling! The biggest one we need (and maybe I would say that if we're not pursuing this, perhaps we ought not pursue "extra" things? -- to become more Christ-like as we function within his Body, the church).

Edited November 23, 2009 by milovaný

[Sputterduck]

Our neighbor dumped her husband for an old flame she hooked up on Facebook. She was just "bored" she gave as her reason to give up on her marriage.

 

 

Her poor husband! If only she has consulted God first on that one. Is she Christian?

[Sputterduck]

I am wondering if this might be the case too, although I have NO idea about another dear sister's life. It can certainly be one's calling to remain content where they are; a "calling" doesn't have to be an outside ministry opportunity.

 

I'm developing a similar reaction to "callings" as some have mentioned here. My husband I wholeheartedly 100% believed we were "called" to a certain ministry; for several years we worked hard at and loved k. But we also wondered why it wasn't really growing much. We had relationship with the people we were ministering to, but we had dreams to do "this" and ideas to do "that" and those things never developed. We were willing to give more of ourselves, go places so we could bless these people, etc. but it didn't go far.

 

We've had a major change in our spiritual life this past year, and now we are not even working in that ministry at all. And now we're peaceful and content, trusting what God is doing. There is so much God wants to do IN us, you know? To me, that's our calling! The biggest one we need (and maybe I would say that if we're not pursuing this, perhaps we ought not pursue "extra" jthings? -- to become more Christ-like as we function within his Body, the church.

 

 

But callings aren't always grand and big and huge. Maybe touching those you did touch was the point of the time you spent? Your big dreams and ideas aren't a "calling" though.

[OnTheBrink]

Following a "calling" that glorifies oneself is sin and not a calling.

 

That's what I'm saying.

 

Bailing on the work God has given a person is exactly what ignoring a calling is.

 

You can't bail on what you're not doing. I'd rather someone say they have the desire to do something. There's nothing wrong with that at all. Desires can be placed by God and they can be tested by Scripture. Or they can be not placed by God and still look like good things. Saying something is a "calling" implies that A) God specifically spoke to them, giving them a directive to do something, which I don't believe happens today. B) implies that if they don't act on it, they're in sin. For example, I have had the desire to help women in bad marriages or who are experiencing unplanned pregnancies. My first envisioning of this desire was to run a shelter or center for such women. I've not done that. Am I in sin? I don't believe so. I believe the desire is a godly one, but I've had bigger ministries on my plate that have not allowed me to invest the time or money into such a project. But, along the way, I've been able to come alongside women in both situations and offer encouragement, meet practical needs, etc. Did God call me to do this? I don't know for sure, but I know that I've had the desire to do it and I've done it when God's brought someone into my life that I can be there for. I have compassion and experience in these areas, so it aligns with who God has allowed me to become.

 

God does not call a woman from her family's needs and I would be the first person to think a woman is sinning by doing so.

 

I'm glad you said that; I thought you were saying the opposite. And, we might actually be saying the same things here, just from different sides of the street. ;)

.

[Jean in Newcastle]

My husband has a calling to use his spiritual gift of pastor teacher. He has utilized that gift in a number of situations before that particular door closed. Having a door closed, though, doesn't mean that he lost his calling.

 

I'm not as positive what my spiritual gift(s) is/are. I do know that I am called to worship God in music and have shared musically wherever I am planted at the moment. I am also called to teach in some form. In the past, that was limited to my children only. Right now that is tweens in our church. I also tend to gravitate to the elderly and the ill, perhaps because I feel elderly due to my own chronic illness! I guess what I'm saying is that I tend to see certain needs (musical, teaching, certain types of people) while I'm sure there are other equally valid needs which I don't even notice because of how God has made me. In addition, other people tend to call on me for certain things - usually as a problem solver/counselor. They recognize something in me that I don't really recognize myself. But I pray that God will use my attempts to answer those people who reach out to me in that way.

[UnPrairieMuffin]

I'm sorry but that's a little creepy. How do you know what plans God has for this woman and her family? Stop thinking? Seriously?

 

*shudder*

 

Families like hers do amazing things all the time when they are following God's calling.

 

Shudder??? Really, I don't think you understand what I was writing. I said "thinking too much," not to quit thinking. Believe me, there is a difference.

 

I don't think you read what I wrote. And I certainly don't think I deserve shuddering or a being called "creepy".

 

Erin