s/o homeschooling and the little ones

[Penelope]

I hope I am not the only one that feels this way. But, I have littler ones still, too, and I understand a little bit, the issue of what to do with little ones while homeschooling, but... I still feel said when I read threads about it. Nothing in particular about the thread that is active now inspired this post, because I feel that way every time I think about it.

 

I worry that my littler ones get short shrift in my homeschooling family. I like the idea of assigning an older child time to play with the toddler, but the truth is, I want to play with my baby instead of doing grammar.

 

Keeping the little ones busy so they stay out of the way and telling them they can't interrupt just doesn't sit right with me sometimes. My oldest got to do more fun stuff with me, will have had more days at the park, and the zoo, and more field trips than the younger ones will get, if we continue to homeschool. I know not everything will be the same for each child, that's life, but a little part od me says, well, they would get a lot more mommy time, and one on one time in these early years, if I weren't homeschooling. Am I hurting their IQs, their vocabulary development, by shuffling them off at certain times of the day? I love the toddler and preschool stage and would rather spend time doing things geared to them, than much else.

 

I can't be the only one to wonder or feel bad about this.

[Lisa in the UP of MI]

My oldest is only in K so I'm not sure how this will work as she gets older, but for now everyone hangs out together at school time. DD usually does spelling, handwriting, and math while the younger two are sleeping. Everything else we do together. And I make sure to plan some things that are geared toward the youngers. Some of the things that we do that are geared toward the younger kids are: nursery rhymes, puppets, musical exploration, and toddler games. Everyone enjoys these things. :) I know as dd gets older and has a bigger course load that I won't be able to keep up with quite as many of these types of things but I hope to keep at least some of these things in our daily schedule.

[8filltheheart]

I can't be the only one to wonder or feel bad about this.

 

Nope, you are not alone. I have struggled with this especially the last 7 yrs since I have been teaching high school.

 

Homeschooling is a trade off. I am one person and I can't do everything. My little ones don't lack in me time, but they do not get to do all the little "kiddie" trips that were the norm when my oldest kids were the young ones.

 

I would evaluate how much time you are spending doing school, though. With your oldest being a 2nd grader, your days don't need to be longer than a couple of hours. There should still be plenty of time for fun times with you all of your kids.

 

As they get older, that reality does change and school does take over the entire day.

[raganfamily]

I understand where you are coming from. We did many fun, creative things with my older kids when they were younger. I find that I do not do the same with my younger ones. I am too busy with the older kids or just too tired when there is free time. I am trying to find this balance as well.

 

We have only been homeschooling a year and I can say that when my kids were in school I was at the school alot with my toddler. So, she is not getting less of my time because we are homeschooling, it is because she is number 5.

[Mallory]

I have one rhetoric, logic, grammar, preschooler, and baby. So we run the whole range here.

 

I don't expect the little ones not to interupt or be with us. And while our picture of school may be quiet with everyone focused and working, real jobs aren't that way. You are often dealing with phone calls, telling someone to do this, writing down this, and thinking about your next meeting all at the same time. So I don't even feel badly that my 14yo's anatomy lesson is interupted by a baby that wants to nurse or I have to deal with my 3yo finding his shoes during my 10yo's writing lesson.

 

Yes, our house is a little chaotic, but I am okay with that. Sure, there are times that someone needs extra time with no distractions, but that isn't every day, or even every week. And the older kids can find somewhere quiet if they need it for reading or something, but again, they usually do just fine amid the distractions.

 

I also try to see thier interactions with their siblings as being as important as thier interactions with me. Some day I hope that they are all still involved with each others' lives, and fostering this closeness is part of why I homeschool. For example, both of the littles love a chance to spend some time getting all thier big brotherss attention. Believe me, that neither my 8yo or my 3yo are missing out on time with me when they get a chance to check the bait trap or go fishing instead of going to the park or reading a book with me. Just as the 1 yo loves to go outside and have one of the bigger kids watch her ride her trike on the porch.

 

But I also think that none of your children are too old to spend the days playing and having field trips. Even with out worksheets or planned lessons there is still so much for a 2nd grader to get from the park or the zoo, or making cookies. If you really feel this way then plan that stuff first, even at 7yo it is okay if planting seeds and going to the pumpkin patch come before the 3Rs. Do the fun stuff then do school on days that are too rainy or too cold.

 

If what you are trying to do now isn't working for you, change it. As they get older it is going to be so much harder to take days off.

[ondreeuh]

I have a nearly-2 year old and there's absolutely no doubt he gets less of my attention because I'm homeschooling. Even though I do the bulk of my educating while he's napping, that pushes housework and stuff to his awake time, plus I'm kinda burnt out at the end of the day and feel less like going out and doing something.

 

I'm trying to shift my schedule so we do stuff in the morning before naptime. Last week on a rare dry day we went to the zoo and were home by 11:30. I'd love to do library story time or go to the inflatable gym place but those kinds of things are either during naptime, or forbidden for kids over a certain age (so I couldn't bring my 8 y./o).

[tofuscramble]

I feel guilty about this all the time. I try to make up for it by spending extra time with my little one, just talking and playing, but it doesn't always work out.

[athena1277]

I have felt this way from time to time. To try to make up for it, I try to schedule in some one-on-one time with ds. What I like to do is spend 30 minutes with him during dd's quiet reading time. I take that time to do puzzles, read books or other things ds wants to do. I also let him help me with some of the household chores while dd does her independent work in the mornings. He loves to fill the washing machine or put away the silverware. It may not be the park or the zoo, but it is still good bonding time.

[JoyfulMama]

... I'd love to do library story time or go to the inflatable gym place but those kinds of things are either during naptime, or forbidden for kids over a certain age (so I couldn't bring my 8 y./o).

 

I never did the gym places, but I don't let my older dd prevent me from going to the library storytimes for the youngers. Although it has been difficult to find a storytime someone for BOTH of the youngers at times, since more and more libraries are doing things for specific age groups. Now that my older one is no longer really interested in the storytimes, sometimes we do grammar or something during that time, or sometimes she just explores the stacks. If the library of all places would give me a hard time, I'd remind them that a love of reading is one of my life-long goals for my children, and I don't think they'd give me a problem.

Sometimes we do things more geared toward my youngers, and sometimes we do something more geared toward the elder. But trips to museums and the zoo have always been something I've loved since they can be wonderful for all of them.

 

In general, I guess I feel that those things that were important with #1 are also important with all those after #1... but time is relative. I don't spend hours reading just to the yonger ones, but also to them all, so the level of the books I'm reading is more varied, as are the topics. I still encourage time outside, time in free play, time in creativity, time with books, and in family cleaning time. My methods have changed over time in order to meet changes in our family, and those needed for the progression of learning. But I also am glad that my children have learned by example how to willingly and gladly read to or play with a sibling when my attention needs to be somewhere else for a few minutes. That to me is so rewarding to see.

Now if I could hire a cook and a cleaner, by all means I'd rather do that so that I could play and read ALLLL day. :tongue_smilie:

[MeaganS]

I don't have any older kids, but I am the oldest of 6 kids and feel like there's something I can contribute. The younger children not getting as much attention is common in most families, not just homeschoolers. We were public schooled, and my parents spent way more time on me than my younger siblings. I think this is common everywhere. I also didn't get the cool toys and gadgets because my parents were poor when I was little. Now they have more money and my younger siblings get a nice car. It's a tradeoff that isn't necessarily fair, but realistic nonetheless.

 

Mostly I just wanted to point out this isn't because of homeschooling. If the kids where in public school, the younger kids would get ignored when they got home from school anyways. I'd be willing to bet they get as much attention throughout the day as a public schooler's younger sibling.

[Karen in CO]

When my oldest was highscool and the middle was little and the youngest was a baby, I had to be really flexible and creative. I'd drop off the oldest for class at the CC then take the younger two to the zoo for three hours until the oldest was out of class then go pick him up. We'd take his books to the playground on nice days so that they could play and I could supervise his work which was frequently interrupted by the need to play. He and I would read Shakespeare aloud and torture the youngest two with it. We'd all do art together. I'd give him assignments to rewrite a piece of Old English poetry into prose that his sister would enjoy. We'd all go to the museums and zoos and go camping.

 

Now, with him in college, I do history topically with the girls. Colonies with the third grader and pilgrims with the early K. Math with both. Copywork for each. Cooking, art, zoo trips, music, read alouds, daily nature walks, poetry - together. Field trips, nature walks, free play, building things, gardening, art, music - those are all things that are important to a second grader as well as to younger kids. I'd work on streamling the work and making sure you are including fun time.

 

Now, of course, part of what you are experiencing you would probably feel whether you homeschooled or not. Its that feeling that your younger kids don't get the undivided MOM that your firstborn had. And it is true and inescapible.

[Jane]

We must be the odd family out. When I posed this question to my family, they were stunned. No one thinks our littles are short changed, rather that the they have a richer environment because of the olders.

 

To the original poster, I too adore the toddler/preschool ages. Every day I make sure I sit on the floor and play with them. I would think with a 2nd grader your school day will be on the shorter side (than ours) and you could make such time for the littles too. In fact, your 2nd grader would probably get a big kick out of some of the activities geared more towards the littles.

[Leila]

This is a very common situation among families with multiple kids. I guess in my case, now that my eldest is in 5th grade, he has been doing a lot of his stuff on his own. For example, if he is doing his writing, I do my best to stay away from doing chores but use this time to do stuff with my younger ones (5 & 3 y/o) either we play or do school stuff. I make sure in the morning that I do important stuff with my eldest and I let my 2 young ones watch their dvds ( Leap Frog DVDs/ Magic School Bus ). Then in the afternoon, I set time for read alouds. I know I should be doing more with them but I have to be honest, I have been homeschooling for 4 yrs now and still struggling with time. But every year, I see things they learned from me even with the little time I give them. Then I think to myself that I am not doing bad. Of course we will always worry. We want to be fair with all our kids but what is important is we try and we do things that matters with them.

I remember when my eldest was 6 and starting kindergarten. I had a toddler and an infant at that time. I know I can't possibly do everything I want to do with him. So I picked the 3 most important things for him. We did reading, math and writing. I know I want to do more arts and stuff but having the baby hinders us from doing a lot of stuff. And I felt really guilty. But just last week, I heard him reading to his brothers and telling them that Mommy had read that book so many time to him. And he loved it. Those kind of moments lead me to believe that I did well with what I had in my time. Hope this helps.

[justamouse]

I would evaluate how much time you are spending doing school, though. With your oldest being a 2nd grader, your days don't need to be longer than a couple of hours. There should still be plenty of time for fun times with you all of your kids.

 

 

This. Really. With only one in second grade you should have a lot of time to play.

[LittleIzumi]

Both of mine are young, so if I stop to do something fun with the Dramatist, then the Sponge comes looking over my shoulder and wants to play too :001_huh: so it works both ways. I try to "school" both of them at the same time, if possible, just doing things at different levels. So neither gets short shrift, just the Dramatist is coloring and thinks she's writing while the Sponge is writing and adding. They go to library storytime together (now the Sponge is old enough for the preschool session but on one day a week, it's the same time as the lil' kid storytime), and our reading sessions are together, as is science (try to explain to a 2-year-old how to look IN to the little microscope eyehole :lol:). I'm sure it will be different when they are older and there is another baby, but I also babywear for a long time so I imagine the little one will be attached to me until he/she is ready to pretend to school along, or to have one sibling play with the wee one (which they would want to do anyway--they love babies) while I work with the other. Anyone besides the first or one with a large age gap will naturally get less of my attention, but will get sibling attention that the first one missed out on. So it helps to balance things out.

[lakotajm]

I would evaluate how much time you are spending doing school, though. With your oldest being a 2nd grader, your days don't need to be longer than a couple of hours. There should still be plenty of time for fun times with you all of your kids.

 

As they get older, that reality does change and school does take over the entire day.

 

Ok, here is where I am wondering if I am doing something all wrong. Everyone says that 1st-3rd shouldn't take more than a couple of hours. I have a dd6 and a dd 4 (almost 5) who do 1st together (with adjustments for the youngest, of course). I also have a 7th grader.

 

I have been just doing school all together starting around 9:30, with a couple of breaks, and we seldom end before 3:00. Often we don't get our electives in before I just give up. There are a lot of interuptions, disruptions, running off to play when supposed to be doing school, time-outs, etc.

 

When I try to help the older, the youngers try to escape. When I try to help the youngers, the older needs help.

 

I have read some of the scheduling advice given for the original post about what to do with youngers. I was wondering if it is possible to do each individually, consecutively. Would the other two cooperate and not interupt, I wonder?

 

I'm wondering how to make this work. What we are doing is exhausting and usually ends up a "shut up and sit down!" routine that no one looks forward too. Oh, and in a related gripe, why is it everyone talks about read-aloud time as such a glowing and special time? :glare:Mine hate it! I end up having to wrestle them onto the couch repeatedly. Play-doh only works some of the time. The older one does her groaning and eye-rolling thing. What's up with that?

 

So, maybe this could also segue into another post entitled-"Does anyone else actually NOT enjoy homeschooling?";)

 

Lakota

[nd293]

I can't be the only one to wonder or feel bad about this.

 

Oh, you aren't. At least, I'm there to keep you company.

 

I have a dd9, and ds2. Dd did not watch any TV until she was 18 months old. I was always engaged with her, and it really showed - in her motor skills, her vocab, her confidence. We prepared to move country and started homeschooling when ds was about the same age. For several months he was watching hours of TV a day. It's a very hard thing to bring back under control, and besides, it's the only thing that really keeps him quiet and occupied for long enough for me to do any work with dd. To make matters worse, he sleeps with me, and sleeps badly, and I have recently realised that I am just not going to cope with homeschooling much longer unless I nap with him during the day. So that is less time to do one-on-one work with dd, and more TV time for him.

 

And, sadly, I can see that his development lags behind hers because of the "shortfall" in my attention. I miss having time with ds so much, and wish I felt OK about just sending dd to school like everyone else so I could enjoy my toddler time with him...

[LittleIzumi]

Ok, here is where I am wondering if I am doing something all wrong. Everyone says that 1st-3rd shouldn't take more than a couple of hours. I have a dd6 and a dd 4 (almost 5) who do 1st together (with adjustments for the youngest, of course). I also have a 7th grader.

 

I have been just doing school all together starting around 9:30, with a couple of breaks, and we seldom end before 3:00. Often we don't get our electives in before I just give up. There are a lot of interuptions, disruptions, running off to play when supposed to be doing school, time-outs, etc.

 

When I try to help the older, the youngers try to escape. When I try to help the youngers, the older needs help.

 

I have read some of the scheduling advice given for the original post about what to do with youngers. I was wondering if it is possible to do each individually, consecutively. Would the other two cooperate and not interupt, I wonder?

 

I'm wondering how to make this work. What we are doing is exhausting and usually ends up a "shut up and sit down!" routine that no one looks forward too. Oh, and in a related gripe, why is it everyone talks about read-aloud time as such a glowing and special time? :glare:Mine hate it! I end up having to wrestle them onto the couch repeatedly. Play-doh only works some of the time. The older one does her groaning and eye-rolling thing. What's up with that?

 

So, maybe this could also segue into another post entitled-"Does anyone else actually NOT enjoy homeschooling?";)

 

Lakota

 

Wow.

 

Umm, maybe you need more breaks? No one should be constantly running away and getting mad, not every day, I would think. When we first started it was intense and dd didn't like it, and I ended up splitting up the day into play/subject 1/play/subject 2/play/eat/play/subject 3 (etc) and then dd stopped rebelling and even started asking for more school during the later playtimes. But having to sit down for a long period of time at once, no way. She would hate it. We have LOTS of breaks, and do a lot of educational breaks (like they play Starfall on a lot of their down time). What are you reading to them? We usually pick our books together at the library, or I'll pick stuff that appeals to each of them in turn, and then read some of each. If there's something they don't like, it's only one of several books so they have to stay for the one but they like the others so it's not torture--or I'll cut it shorter then I planned, and say they have to listen until the end of chapter, or the end of the next page, and with an end in sight they'll stay put ;).

[Karen in CO]

Ok, here is where I am wondering if I am doing something all wrong. Everyone says that 1st-3rd shouldn't take more than a couple of hours. I have a dd6 and a dd 4 (almost 5) who do 1st together (with adjustments for the youngest, of course). I also have a 7th grader.

.......

So, maybe this could also segue into another post entitled-"Does anyone else actually NOT enjoy homeschooling?";)

 

Lakota

 

Um, yeah. That doesn't sound good at all. First, since you asked.... My recently turned 5yo is still exempt from anything that involves sitting down when she doesn't want to join us. I ask before we do math "Do you want to join us for math?" She answers, "Not today, I'm busy playing." She's allowed to play as long as she doesn't destroy the house or make so much noise that her sister throws her self onto the floor proclaiming, "How can anyone work with all that noise going on?"

 

My newly 5yo, does typically join us for read alouds, but I never read more than 15-20 minutes during the day unless compelled to do so by the kids, and I wouldn't make the 7th grader listen to the first grade books or the other way around either. And I'd make sure it was books that they enjoyed listening too and often begged for just a little more of.

 

I'd give the 6yo some school attention in the morning first thing and knock out reading and math and move a read aloud to bedtime and give them to Daddy - :) .

 

I'd get the math and any work that needs real attention for the 7th grader done next. Then hurry them all out for recess. Later do lunch, art, science and stuff but let the little ones be free to come and go.

 

Hopefully that helps some. :grouphug:

[rowan25]

I hope I am not the only one that feels this way. But, I have littler ones still, too, and I understand a little bit, the issue of what to do with little ones while homeschooling, but... I still feel said when I read threads about it. Nothing in particular about the thread that is active now inspired this post, because I feel that way every time I think about it.

 

I worry that my littler ones get short shrift in my homeschooling family. I like the idea of assigning an older child time to play with the toddler, but the truth is, I want to play with my baby instead of doing grammar.

 

Keeping the little ones busy so they stay out of the way and telling them they can't interrupt just doesn't sit right with me sometimes. My oldest got to do more fun stuff with me, will have had more days at the park, and the zoo, and more field trips than the younger ones will get, if we continue to homeschool. I know not everything will be the same for each child, that's life, but a little part od me says, well, they would get a lot more mommy time, and one on one time in these early years, if I weren't homeschooling. Am I hurting their IQs, their vocabulary development, by shuffling them off at certain times of the day? I love the toddler and preschool stage and would rather spend time doing things geared to them, than much else.

 

I can't be the only one to wonder or feel bad about this.

:iagree: I haven't read the rest of the posts yet, but you aren't the only one. I often feel a little badly for my ds2 because he certainly isn't getting the same kind of attention that my dd5 got at that same age. Of course, at that time we were living with my parents while our house was being rebuilt from Katrina. So she had parents AND grandparents! :tongue_smilie:

[crowscreek]

We are 2nd grade, K, and preschool here. I try to involve everyone in "school time" even if it's just letting the 3 and 4 year olds hold the book while I read or letting them fetch pencils, sharpen said pencils, etc.

 

It is NOT easy by any means and we have a lot of start and stopping going on, but in the end we have a pretty successful time....even though some days resemble a Chinese fire drill. :)

 

Now, when we first started homeschooling (when I had infants)...it was kind of sketchy getting it all done without a little craziness.

 

:grouphug: to you!! Keep up the good work.

[2squared]

I worry that my littler ones get short shrift in my homeschooling family.

 

I can't be the only one to wonder or feel bad about this.

 

I know exactly how you feel. My youngest two are missing all the fun first-time mom stuff I did with my oldest two. I don't get out the playdoh and paints hardly at all anymore, and I don't sit and watch the grass blow like I used to. I feel bad for me that I'm missing that time with them, but I see that they are doing very, very well and getting their own experiences. My 1yo is the most well-loved little sister you will ever find, and all her siblings drop everything to play with her. My 3yo has a built-in wrestle buddy and explorer with his big brother. My older two missed out on those experiences. :glare:

 

Our school work only last 1-1.5 hours/day, and it pretty much all happens while my littles nap. The problem, as I see it, is that I am busier than I used to be. Having four young children in six years is a lot of work, and the work is 24/7. I don't get the chance to nap with my littles anymore, I rarely get anywhere child free anymore, relatives won't watch all of them anymore, etc. I wasn't nearly this weary with only two dc.

 

I should add that I love having four dc. Our family is full of fun. laughter, and love, but it's a lot of work!!!

[8filltheheart]

Ok, here is where I am wondering if I am doing something all wrong. Everyone says that 1st-3rd shouldn't take more than a couple of hours. I have a dd6 and a dd 4 (almost 5) who do 1st together (with adjustments for the youngest, of course). I also have a 7th grader.

 

 

 

Lakota

 

Based on your signature, are you only doing math and basic LA with the 6 and 6 yr old and it is taking until 3?

 

First, I do not do pre-school whether they are ready or not. I am not a believer in early academics. There is a lifetime of having to do school ahead of her. (My current 4 yod is showing signs that she is ready to start learning to read and does math orally when she is playing. She picks up a lot simply playing in the room while I am working with my 7 yo. It is more than enough for me. Next yr when she is 5, I will start basic K with her, but even then, it won't be for more than 45 mins-1hr total.)

 

I sit with my 7 yod from beginning to end of her academic work. She doesn't get any breaks (she doesn't work long enough to need any!) I alternate heavy "her" subjects and "me" subjects. For example, she does math first. Then I read religion to her. Then she might do ETC or spelling. Then I might read her from whatever we are reading for science. (All 3 of those last subjects only take 15-20 mins total). Then she reads to me. I give her a copywork assignment from her reading. After she completes her copywork, I use it to discuss mechanics, grammar, and sentence structure.

 

Then, she is done and free to play the rest of the day.

 

I read aloud to my little kids as a bedtime story. If I felt the need to do it during the day, I would let them play with playdough, color, build with blocks, etc while I was reading if they didn't want to just snuggle and listen.

 

HTH

[lakotajm]

Our schedule is like this:

 

Bible Study-takes between 10 and 45 minutes, depending on behavior and activities

Math-Usually takes about 20 minutes for the littles and 30-45 for dd13.

Then a snack and break. Often they play on the computer or with toys. Sometimes outside for 15-30 minutes.

Then Reading/Writing/Spelling/Handwriting-Takes about 45 minutes for littles (mostly because they balk at the handwriting-they get bored and restless. I have to repeatedly bring them back to the task). This slows me down from getting to dd13 to give her her spelling lesson, so then she is restless.

Then it's lunch break for about 45 minutes.

Then we do read-aloud if I think I can pull it off. About a chapter.

Then it's History with SOTW. This is starting to go better now that I have gotten the Activity Guide and audio as some suggested. Takes about 20 minutes. More for dd13 if she has an assignment.

Science for littles (from Sonlight 1) takes 5 minutes for me to read then 10 for a worksheet , 15 minutes for an experiment, if one is scheduled.

Electives-if we can get to it, I try to plan an elective each day like a home ec project (cook, sew, etc.) on Monday, Sign-language on Tuesday, Health/Safety on Wed., Critical Thinking on Thursday.

Friday is co-op day with art and music afterwards, after lunch-does not go over well. (We go to their gg's house to spend the night the night before. GG has cable, so the minute they land after being anywhere, it's a lightning dash to the remote and I have to kill Spongebob if I want them to do art or music.) Ugly. Even with reminders and warnings, it is never pretty.

Sigh. I guess I am overloading the littles, but it didn't work well to leave dd4 to her own devices previously so I just integrated her with what dd6 was doing. They would always distract and disrupt when separated, but they do this when supposedly in school, together, as well. I am befuddled.

Lakota

[Penelope]

Sorry I forgot to check this thread for a few days. I really appreciate the responses. I feel a lot better just reading through them.

 

Those of you who said I shouldn't need too many hours of the day to school a 7 year old, are right, of course. When we are in a groove and that 7 year old is cooperating like he should, which is most of the time, thankfully, it doesn't take too long. Still, 2 hours of intense mom-time is still a big chunk. I am also thinking about next year when we will add a couple of subjects, and then beyond that. It concerns me. I'm not trying to borrow trouble, but I see this topic of "what to do with the little ones" all the time, and I can already notice the issue a little bit at my house.

 

I never thought about it being the same if the kids were in public school. I'm not sure about that, though. If oldest was in school, the younger ones would be at home together, yes, but everything would be geared toward them for 6 hours per day. There is just no way around that. Like someone said, it is a tradeoff. Thank you for reminding me that there are benefits to being a younger sib in a home school, though. :001_smile: I needed to be reminded that relationships are a very big reason I have them all home in the first place.

[Colleen in SEVA]

In general, I think it is my oldest who misses out the most. When he was younger, we didn't do a lot of the little kid fun stuff (art class, story time, crafts, etc) because I was busy with the 3 babies. Now that he is starting to get interested in bigger kid stuff (robotics class, Lego League, Math Olympiad, etc), we aren't able to do it because either the facilities aren't set up to be toddler-compatible, or it happens during nap time, or it would be a logistical nightmare.

 

The poster above has inspired me about story time. Although one local library has a strict "no siblings", "threes ONLY" type policy, the other one has been flexible enough in the past that I think I can take my 3 middle, leave youngest in stroller, and allow the oldest to look around the children's section nearby. We will see. LOL!

 

I have a dd6 and a dd 4 (almost 5) who do 1st together (with adjustments for the youngest, of course). I also have a 7th grader.

 

I have been just doing school all together starting around 9:30, with a couple of breaks, and we seldom end before 3:00. Often we don't get our electives in before I just give up. There are a lot of interuptions, disruptions, running off to play when supposed to be doing school, time-outs, etc.

...

 

why is it everyone talks about read-aloud time as such a glowing and special time? :glare:Mine hate it!

 

Oh, I can SO relate to most of what you said! I find that I am constantly changing our daily routine as the kids' stages & abilities change, but I will share what has worked for us for this school year so far.

 

I will say honestly that this is the first school year that a lot of content-subject work is actually getting done. For the last 4+ years, we've mostly been skill-subject focused. I divide our day into morning and afternoon. It doesn't do any good to assign times, because it NEVER EVER works out. In the morning, I am using the Workbox idea for the oldest 4 using 6 boxes each. I turn every curriculum into a "do the next thing" so it does not require any weekly planning. These are all individual subjects -- math, Latin, grammar, etc. The three oldest have different curriculums for each subject, they learn so differently! R has fun things in his box, he's not ready for anything formal yet. There are basic instructions written on the outside of each book, like "do 2 pages and check with me" or "diagram 2 sentences then check the answers". These are as independant as possible -- but my kids are NOT very independant. Each of the 4 has his own work space in our work room, I created it with those cheap 12" wide bookshelves from Target, with 16" deep closet shelving across the top (so... about $70 total for 4 desks!). I sit at a table in the room and they come to me for help or to look over their work, or to teach the "with Mom" subjects like math and phonics. R is usually at the table too, or on my lap, or in the fridge, or chasing the cat, or washing random objects in the bathroom sink. W so far has been pretty easy. He can see into the work room from the kitchen, and the older 3 rotate playing with him during a break from school. B is the only one who has to finish a set amount of school work each day. G & D work for a while, then play, then come back and work. It may look like chaos to someone with a small family, but it works for us. LOL!

 

For the afternoon subjects, W is asleep and R is sometimes having quiet time on my bed and sometimes playing. The older 3 do history, science, and art/music during this time -- things we do together. For example -- we all listen to the SOTW CD and color the picture while listening, then B has additional work on his own (Sonlight Core 6). This is the time I work through the reading books with G and D. Then B does his science reading & taking notes on his own while I do Sonlight K Science with G and D (and R sometiems listens in, but usually not because he is very disruptive!). I then discuss the history & science reading with B while the younger 4 all go play in the other room.

 

OH! One other thing we just started doing for science experiments (previously, I tended to skip them because there was too much bickering about who got to do what, and R would usually mess with stuff, and we never had the materials) -- each boy has his own day to do an experiment. Monday is R, and I pick something simple from the Mudpie to Magnet book, Tuesday is D and he does the experiment from the Sonlight K science because there is a DVD to watch as he is not reading yet. G is Wednesday and I have a stack of Young Scientist Club kits I pick from. B is Thursday, it is scheduled into his Awakening Wonder lesson plans, and we bought the kit so materials are included. This way -- no fighting!! In my plan book, I have one column for experiments where I list any household items I need for that particular experiment, so I can gather ALL of the things at the beginning of the week.

 

My kids don't do well with read alouds if we do it together. I have TRIED to do it at bedtime, all in pjs on my bed, but D & R are just too wiggly and ask too many questions (and anyone thinking "just tell them no questions until the end" has never met D ha ha). B also gets annoyed with read alouds because we do them in small chunks (he prefers to read books in huge sections, usually in 1-2 days). I do read picture books to the younger kids, but we are not currently doing family read aloud and I am ok with that becuase I simply can't. do. it. all.

Edited November 15, 2009 by Colleen in SEVA

[lakotajm]

Woah-I am impressed...You are my new idol! How in the world you do that many different currics with that many kids is... I can't think of a word.

Can you say more about Workboxes? I think I get it, but tell me more.

Lakota

[WiseOwlKnits]

I think my DS gets less play time with me than my DD did when she was his age. BUT, being the younger child gets him experiences that my DD never had.

 

Example: Last week we went to the Blue Bell factory to see how ice cream is made. I never would have taken my DD there at his age. But my DS loved it!

 

So I think it's a bit of a trade-off. And, he has a sibling to play with, which DD never had.

[lulubelle]

I feel the same way as the OP. It isn't easy. And, I do feel bad. And, I keep having this feeling I should be preparing to send my now 3 yo dd to preschool next year, just to have her time. And, then I can have my time with her older brothers. On the other hand, I know I need to plan better for the younger and just take one day at a time and not feel too overwhelmed.

[5LittleMonkeys]

I am one of those moms who schedules the older ones to watch the younger ones so that I can have one on one time to teach. I tried it the other way with everyone at the table and I feel it was not fair to my older dc especially my dd5th who has a very hard time concentrating with distractions.

 

The bonds my dc are creating between each other is priceless to me. Although the selfish mommy in me wants all their little too short childhood years to myself I am realistic and know that I won't be around forever and that the bonds they create with each other now will keep them together as a family when I am gone. This is very important to me.

 

My little ones by no means get neglected by me. I spend lots of time with them in the afternoons and evenings and weekends. No one is wanting for attention in our house.

[abreakfromlife]

I have been just doing school all together starting around 9:30, with a couple of breaks, and we seldom end before 3:00. Often we don't get our electives in before I just give up. There are a lot of interuptions, disruptions, running off to play when supposed to be doing school, time-outs, etc.

 

I am in the same boat.....and

I find that I am constantly changing our daily routine as the kids' stages & abilities change, but I will share what has worked for us for this school year so far.

this was very, very helpful.

[johnandtinagilbert]

Nope, you are not alone. I have struggled with this especially the last 7 yrs since I have been teaching high school.

 

Homeschooling is a trade off. I am one person and I can't do everything. My little ones don't lack in me time, but they do not get to do all the little "kiddie" trips that were the norm when my oldest kids were the young ones.

 

I would evaluate how much time you are spending doing school, though. With your oldest being a 2nd grader, your days don't need to be longer than a couple of hours. There should still be plenty of time for fun times with you all of your kids.

 

As they get older, that reality does change and school does take over the entire day.

:iagree: with you and the OP. I actually just enrolled my 7yo in baseball and remembered at this point, the elder group had already done a lot more than he has, as far as outside activities.

 

There is a trade off, but I think he has something the others did not...older siblings! He adores his big sibs. He has met many milestones before the elders b/c he just follows suit.

 

It is a tough balance to give them each all we can and as the years go by, it's tough to fit it all in, so you just have to find pleasure in small moments and work throughout the day to enjoy and foster them all. It's def. hard work! Dh and I say all the time how easy life would be if we only had 2 dc!

 

I find some comfort in knowing that I will be able to spend more time with them as older children, though. Kind of a trade of off in years by order, but not love or time. When the youngers are alone at home, just imagine all the wonderful things we'll enjoy while the elders have moved on and out!

 

You are not alone. It is a tough battle for us all.

[johnandtinagilbert]

Ok, here is where I am wondering if I am doing something all wrong. Everyone says that 1st-3rd shouldn't take more than a couple of hours. I have a dd6 and a dd 4 (almost 5) who do 1st together (with adjustments for the youngest, of course). I also have a 7th grader.

 

I have been just doing school all together starting around 9:30, with a couple of breaks, and we seldom end before 3:00. Often we don't get our electives in before I just give up. There are a lot of interuptions, disruptions, running off to play when supposed to be doing school, time-outs, etc.

 

When I try to help the older, the youngers try to escape. When I try to help the youngers, the older needs help.

 

I have read some of the scheduling advice given for the original post about what to do with youngers. I was wondering if it is possible to do each individually, consecutively. Would the other two cooperate and not interupt, I wonder?

 

I'm wondering how to make this work. What we are doing is exhausting and usually ends up a "shut up and sit down!" routine that no one looks forward too. Oh, and in a related gripe, why is it everyone talks about read-aloud time as such a glowing and special time? :glare:Mine hate it! I end up having to wrestle them onto the couch repeatedly. Play-doh only works some of the time. The older one does her groaning and eye-rolling thing. What's up with that?

 

So, maybe this could also segue into another post entitled-"Does anyone else actually NOT enjoy homeschooling?";)

 

Lakota

FWIW, I have 2 7 year olds and our school day looks like this:

6:30 fruit, bread

7 bible, worship

7:30 Math

8 Language arts -- all LA some days is 45 min, if our dictation is long, it's an hour

9 breakfast

9:45 History read aloud, geography, or project, but mostly read aloud

10Science

10:30 PE

11 Assigned Reading (they reinforce either history or science)

11:30 Narrations on History

12 Lunch

12:30 they complete geography practice online(mut get 100% 5 times), spelling city for practice(2 games per day), MUS online drills (10 min)

 

They they're free. Usually done at 1:30. That's 7-1:30. Def. not a 2 hour day for us. They get their work finished. They have to be regularly reminded to focus, but get it done. We used to do all subjects together, but the elders just sit around waiting, waiting, waiting for the youngers and it's not fair.

 

After lunch, Elder History is anywhere from 15m-1hour, then I get with the 4th grader for all her work with me (Language Arts, Math instruction)

 

3 prepare for dinner

 

4pm meetings with Oldest 3 (6, 7, 8 grades)

 

Fridays I teach Spanish and Latin for the week and they elder 4 work on it throughout the week as assigned.

 

I have a word for you (and me as I'll be adding a 4 and 1 yo end of Nov): Containment. I plan on having small spaces within my view to contain the littles. That's what I did when I had the oldest 3 in school and 2 toddlers. That's what I'll start again. When they are just sitting at the table and coloring while the 2-7year olds are doing LA, they will be happy. You have to teach the littles about interruptions during school time. That may help you a great deal.

 

 

 

 

Our schedule is like this:

 

Bible Study-takes between 10 and 45 minutes, depending on behavior and activities

Math-Usually takes about 20 minutes for the littles and 30-45 for dd13.

Then a snack and break. Often they play on the computer or with toys. Sometimes outside for 15-30 minutes.

Then Reading/Writing/Spelling/Handwriting-Takes about 45 minutes for littles (mostly because they balk at the handwriting-they get bored and restless. I have to repeatedly bring them back to the task). This slows me down from getting to dd13 to give her her spelling lesson, so then she is restless.

Then it's lunch break for about 45 minutes.

Then we do read-aloud if I think I can pull it off. About a chapter.

Then it's History with SOTW. This is starting to go better now that I have gotten the Activity Guide and audio as some suggested. Takes about 20 minutes. More for dd13 if she has an assignment.

Science for littles (from Sonlight 1) takes 5 minutes for me to read then 10 for a worksheet , 15 minutes for an experiment, if one is scheduled.

Electives-if we can get to it, I try to plan an elective each day like a home ec project (cook, sew, etc.) on Monday, Sign-language on Tuesday, Health/Safety on Wed., Critical Thinking on Thursday.

Friday is co-op day with art and music afterwards, after lunch-does not go over well. (We go to their gg's house to spend the night the night before. GG has cable, so the minute they land after being anywhere, it's a lightning dash to the remote and I have to kill Spongebob if I want them to do art or music.) Ugly. Even with reminders and warnings, it is never pretty.

Sigh. I guess I am overloading the littles, but it didn't work well to leave dd4 to her own devices previously so I just integrated her with what dd6 was doing. They would always distract and disrupt when separated, but they do this when supposedly in school, together, as well. I am befuddled.

Lakota

Hang in there. It takes time to train a family and figure out what works for your lot. My olders spent a lot of time with the littles last year, but not at all this year b/c they're duties are too great otherwise and the littles are ready for more. It will come. And no, as much as I LOVE home schooling, some days I don't like it all, but if I get humble b4 God, I can't thank Him enough for this gift.