Do you go to bed before your teens?

[Doran]

We have two girls -- one almost 15 and the other 12.5. The oldest has never seemed to need as much sleep as the youngest. Currently, she goes to bed in the range of 11:00 pm and gets up for volunteer work at 7:30 am. Her younger sister is up until 10:30ish and sleeps until 9:00 am. Me? Some nights, I'm awake as long as they are. Other times, I'm ready to crash at 10:00. It feels so bizarre (wrong, even) going to bed before them. :001_huh: But, I have no logical explanation for why that is. What about you?

Edited July 7, 2009 by Doran

[Crissy]

There have been occasions that I was far too exhausted to stay up as late as either of my boys (who have a latest bed time of 10:00pm).

I felt lazy, but I don't know why that is.

Is there some reason that I must be the last one into bed? Does staying up make me a better mother?

Certainly not. So, why do I feel as if I must be the one to say goodnight and tuck everyone else into bed?

 

:confused:

[Night Elf]

My DH and I regulary go to bed before the kids. We don't have the staying power we used to have! Occasionally I'll stay up with them. We love to watch the medical shows like Mystery Diagnosis and it often comes on in the wee a.m. hours. We don't have regular bedtimes or wake-up times.

[Mrs Mungo]

I voted no. However, I'm a late night person and my teen *neeeeeeds* her sleep. She is *horrid* if she doesn't get enough sleep. I need to make sure she goes to bed or everyone will be miserable the next day.

[Luanne]

You didn't mention going to bed at the same time. Only if one of us isn't feeling well do we go to bed before the other one does.

[KidsHappen]

House full of insomniacs here. I will sometimes go to the kitchen at 3:00 am and run into two or three children somewhere in the house. So around here everyone sleeps whenever they can. Generally speaking the 12 yr. old goes to sleep by midnight, the teens around 1:00, me sometime between 1:00 and 3:00 and there are some mornings I wake up to find that the 9 yr. old has not been to sleep at all. I do have to have all children in the house and the doors locked, and lights in general living areas out before I go to bed. Children are required to retire to their rooms by midnight except for bathroom or quick runs to the kitchen for a drink.

[Angela in GA]

Well, my oldest goes to bed before me during the school year, he goes to public school. I prefer to let him stay up sometimes on the weekends to play Xbox without his younger brother watching over his shoulder. However, my dh has a FIT when I do this. So, sadly, I don't allow him to do if often. It bothers me sometimes that all of my kids go to bed at the same time...the 5 year old the same as the 15 year old. I try to get around this by allowing him to read in his bed, play PSP, etc. for pretty much how long he wants, but it's not the same. So, for now, I go to bed before my teens. :p

[Doran]

Right now, the OTHERS are winning, but only Luanne has explained why she made that choice. Would you Others please explain? :D

 

 

And, Luanne, I do see your point. I suppose that going to bed at the same time ranks as a "No" for me. If they are in bed, with their lights out, it feels different to me than if they are up, reading, even if they're in their beds. It feels like the day is done. But, like Crissy, I somehow feel like less of a mother if I turn in while they are still fully engaged in being awake.

 

(Oh -- and HI MRS. MUNGO!!)

[Denise in Florida]

We are a bunch of night owls. During the summer the girls become more and more nocturnal. Currently, there is usually someone awake in the house until 2:00 or 3:00. When I was younger I can remember staying up late and baking cakes in the middle of the night. Now that I am older I am one the early to bed types (no later than midnight).

[Tap]

I put yes, but only because I don't care if my teen is up later that I am, but it is not usually the case. I am a nightowl. The only time I care if ds14 goes to bed at a certain time, is if he has to get up early the next day. He needs about 8-10 hours of sleep, the more the better.

[Mrs Mungo]

(Oh -- and HI MRS. MUNGO!!)

 

:seeya:

[Starr]

I'm a night owl. :)

[Pamela H in Texas]

my daughter almost always goes to bed before me. my son almost always goes after I do.

[Nicole M]

As you might remember, I wake hours before anyone in this house. I turn into a pumpkin by 9pm. By ten, I'm done. I just make sure I have the internet cable under my pillow, ask the boys to kindly not burn down the house or injure each other and say goodnight.

[JennifersLost]

On the theory that teens still need more sleep than grownups, we send the kids to bed before we go. They're supposed to read for awhile, and then lights out.

 

Every once in awhile, we let them stay up all night and play computer games. This is because I don't allow sleepovers and I know that most kids their ages have way more freedom. I figure let them have some fun in a safe way.

 

I've always been a late night person, anyway, so it isn't hard for me to be up as late as them. It does feel weird when i go to bed and know they're still up.

[Peela]

I like to be in bed before 10, even on holidays. My kids are now at the age they want to stay up late, just because they think that's what teenagers do. Part of teenage rebellion I think :)

I make them go to bed by 9 on schooldays. But on holidays and weekends I am much less rigid about it. Last night we had dinner across the road with friends and dh and I came home about 9pm. Dd15 stayed over there till 11.45 (she had a midnight kerfew). However, although I went to sleep, I knew dh would stay up till dd got home, and he did.

[Cedarmom]

During the summer, my son loves to stay up until 1 or 2 am. That is way too late for me. I think I'm staying up late when I make it to midnight. He probably needs more sleep, but I figure at 17 he's old enough to figure it out.

 

During the school year we all go to bed around the same time.

[Kathy in MD]

I voted sometimes because there are evenings that I just don't make it till ds's normal bedtime. Sometimes I send ds to bed, because it's his bedtime and dh and I are headed upstairs at the same time. and sometimes, like tonight, I'm awake long after everyone else is asleep.

[Arch at Home]

I confess. I sometimes go to sleep before my preteens. Definitely by the time they are teenagers it will be a regular afair. Getting up at 4:00 am doesn't allow me to do anything else.

[Renee in NC]

I always go to bed before my 16yo. I don't regulate his sleep, but I don't think he sleeps enough during the school year.

[Doran]

I like to be in bed before 10, even on holidays. My kids are now at the age they want to stay up late, just because they think that's what teenagers do. Part of teenage rebellion I think :)

I make them go to bed by 9 on schooldays. But on holidays and weekends I am much less rigid about it. Last night we had dinner across the road with friends and dh and I came home about 9pm. Dd15 stayed over there till 11.45 (she had a midnight kerfew). However, although I went to sleep, I knew dh would stay up till dd got home, and he did.

 

This resonates with me. I think "that's what teenagers do", and I'm trying to come to terms with that. School days are kind of a different story. We try to hold to a more formal bedtime when everyone has to get up early the next day. But, even then, there are times when I could see myself slipping off to bed before the kids. I don't, though. Just doesn't feel like I've completed my job by turning in before them. And, that feeling lingers into summer when they want to and are allowed to stay up later.

 

Staying up when kids aren't home yet? That's a whole other story. One of us will always be up to greet the child who is, for some reason, out late. She can count on that. :tongue_smilie: