I grew up being white in majority black schools, though my high school had no majority (lots of asian, hispanic, white, and black students). It is a different experience, but different isn't always bad. I went to a majority white college and felt out of place a lot of the time. I wouldn't rule out HBCs, but Iwould look for blogs and such that will give an idea of campus culture. A long weekend on campus would also be a good idea. It's not racist to consider this aspect of culture, but maybe your daughter felt you were rejecting them sight unseen?

We took a backpack with a leash attachment with us when travelling overseas. We never used it until baggage claims and customs in Miami when we'd been awake for nearly 24 hours and my two year old did NOT want to stand in line. At one point I may even have been dragging him as he sat down and slid across the floor. Not the highlight of my parenthood, but it kept us from missing our next flight. And his screaming sent us to the front of lines. Oddly enough, he still loves that backpack and us.

My kids are just 2 and almost 4, but I like having discussions about picture books with them and now we are getting chapter books. I toss the 2 year old softballs so he can participate (what animal is in this book? Was that funny or sad?) My 3 year old gets things like "did someone in the book have a problem? What was it? How did she try to fix the problem? Did that work? What would you have done? With chapter books it's more like "at the end of the last chapter, the princess got a surprise. Do you remember what it was? What do you thing she's going to do with it in this chapter called "the princess and the fish"? All that to say, book discussions can happen really young, but questions have to be specific ones. I figure that the first couple of recall questions will get one word answers, but the "what did you think about that?" type get longer responses. I only do this with books she seems to want to talk about or with chapter books to help her follow the story.

If it helps him to talk through things, I would work together on making a list of what needs to be done, dividing it by priority level. I'd then go through with him and decide which things you'd like to tackle, which things he'd like to do himself, which you should do together, and which make sense to get outside help on. Something might be possible to do alone but be high enough priority that it is worth getting help on. Likewise a tricky low priority thing could be a great learning diy project. As far as expectations go, expect to be fiddling with the house as long as you live there.

One thing I would recommend is to know your limits with regards to skill and equipment. By this I mean, if you can take great pics of families outdoors but don't have much experience with lighting, please don't agree to photograph an indoor wedding. We hired a family friend who had just started a photography business for our wedding, and the pics just aren't great. They still bring back great memories for us, but... It was no surprise to me that her business faded away shortly thereafter. I assume that was partly due to her own discouragement at the results. Advertising yourself as able to do it all right off the bat will be bad for you, your clients, and your reputation.

You are doing the right thing. You know it. It's the only thing you can do, and it sounds like you are doing it very well. That doesn't mean it is easy or it will be pleasant, but it's right. The end is coming, sadly, but it will be the cancer that kills him, not anything you do. I pray for you in this decision and that it will bring unexpected blessings in the midst of pain.

I thought about this, and at first I thought my husband because if he ever put his foot down and said "this is absolutely what must be" I'd go along with it. Then I realized that if I made such a statement, he would go along with it, too. So I guess this is a partnership. Actually, before we got married he made sure I knew that he didn't want a wife who would be submissive (well, except in the "we submit to each other" way). So when I am with very conservative friends I can tell them my husband won't allow me to obey him. Then I step back and watch their heads explode.

I saw this stat along with a "punk kids these days" headline recently, and it annoyed me so much. Not only does it make great financial sense in many cases for kids to live with parents in young adulthood, some "kids" in that age bracket are playing host to their parents. My bil had his (chronically unemployed) in laws living with them rent-free while he was in his mid twenties.

The Armadillo from Amarillo for Texas. It's very geography-related

Magic is used by other characters in Narnia, though. It's usually negative or they are uneasy about it, but not always. In Dawn Treader Lucy uses a magic book to cast spells and is only rebuked for casting ones she should have known were wrong (letting her eavesdrop and making herself more beautiful than any other). Dr Cornelius uses magic in Prince Caspian to find things. I've known one family that banned the whole series for this reason. Yet they allowed Star Wars! I like them all, but the Force seems more like the kind of thing they ought to be worried about.

Whatever you tell them, I recommend you write it out and give it to all the caregivers, not to give them a script but so that they know what the kids have been told. I've watched little kids while their mom was in surgery and I didn't know what the kids had been told. I didn't want to say too much, but I also didn't want to avoid "where's mommy?" In a way that felt dishonest. Maybe get some kids books, like Curious George goes to the hospital and Madeleine that show a (minor) surgery and that include the idea of recovery time. I'd preread first, of course, but those might be reassuring for kids.

I haven't seen this scientifically studied, but anecdotally, my husband says that one reason it works better against dogs than humans is because a tiny spritz that only barely affects a person is terrifically painful for a dog due to it's enhanced nasal sensitivity. So if the wind it bad, at least you won't be incapacitated by a full dose like you would if you were using it against a person. Of course, he has had real training, so that helps him quickly think of these things in the moment.

Agreement with those who say pepper spray can work to defend against mean dogs. DH is a police officer and has never effectively used or seen anyone use pepper spray or mace on a human (partly because those physically attacking police officers or random bystanders tend to be drug addled), but it's his go to when a dog is attacking. This may sound cruel to dog lovers, but his choice is that, a taser, or a gun. Against humans good situational awareness, avoiding sketchy activities, and a confident demeanor can be more helpful.

I've found that some older people (church ladies in my experience) intentionally go back to it in their 60s or 70s, sort of a "Haha, I'm old now and can talk how I want. Take me or leave me." When they have a lot of valuable things to say, I'm all for blunt advice, but when they tend towards a kind of boring life, it tends towards making mountains out of molehills.

In a similar situation, my first step would be to figure out in Anna is really being controlling/possessive or if that's just how she talks. There are people I know who use overblown language as a matter of course. To them "obviously we need to talk asap" means the same as "Hey, I'm free to talk if you want" would mean coming from me. With those people I just mentally translate everything to something more reasonable. Generally I don't let those folks be my close friends because that gets old, but once I had a close friend like this, and I could even kid her about it and it was no big deal. If she's actually possessive, which is a situation I'm dealing with now, first I try to train the friend (by changing the conversation, ignoring the over the top stuff) then back away slowly, becoming unfortunately busy, if step one doesn't work.

One way our high school math teacher got us seeing the value was designing very hard problems we weren't really expected to solve correctly. If we only gave an answer, it was either right or wrong (and would result in a grade that was dangerously low). If we showed our work and were on the right track, we got generous partial credit. This wasn't for all assignments, but it convinced some pretty stubborn teens to show work. Well, one boy did drop the class over it, so it isn't a perfect method.

I'm sorry you're feeling stress and guilt now, but I think you already have figured out that intelligence is only one small aspect of your children. It certainly isn't the aspect most closely linked to future happiness. I get wanting your kids to be able to really "get" each other, I really do, but can you imagine how gifted your three year old would have to be to actually be a good conversation partner with your highly gifted six year old? Give it time and enjoy all the aspects of your kids' personalities. By the way, my parents thought I was the dumb kid. My older brother was highly verbal about his thoughts and took to math early. When adults asked me questions, I tended to just stare at them. In my mind, if I knew the answer and this adult didn't, it either meant something was weird about this adult or I didn't really know what I thought I did. I didn't even let my parents know I could read because I thought they would get embarrassed if they knew I knew how many rules they were breaking (like "always closely monitor children's teeth brushing before age six" and "do not remove the tag from this mattress.) I learned to play the school game in second grade or so, but I still tried to keep things to myself. I passed my older brother in all areas of academic achievement when I was about 12 and he was about 18. So really, don't try to guess too much what your kids will be like. I do all the time, though, so it's advice more easily given than taken. You are an involved mother who is taking an active interest in your children and their development. That's going to make far more difference to your children and their future than anything you did in the past.

Did you write "Hall Pass" at the top?

I am an INTJ with 2 little ones with me ALL THE TIME. I keep chocolate in my underwear drawer, too! Is this a thing? I thought it was just me. I strategize a lot about ways to sneak that chocolate and to sneak in moments when no one is touching me. I would hate to lose their cuddles and kisses, but breaks are vital!

Bathroom! I grew up in a house with one for 6 people. Being a teen girl and needing the toilet while teen brother is showering is not ideal.

Maybe to help get your daughter's full buy-in it would help to point out to her that she's not the only one being harmed. Yes, there are other victims, but your daughter might see that as "yeah, and their moms don't see a need to tattle." Show her that Mean Girl is also hurting herself by making herself into a terrible person. The adults in her life need to have the chance to intervene and help MG not be terrible. I'm more concerned for the victims, of course, but maybe that would frame it in a way that your daughter would accept action by you as necessary.

Maybe look into compelling biographies of great mathematicians. Adding that human element might help your daughter get the "why study math" in general, even if it isn't specific to algebra. Even a movie like October Sky can show this.

So sorry. It hurts whenever there is an important decision like this and we don't get to make the choice we want to make. I hope you can come to peace with three kids and find plenty of ways to get baby fixes here and there.

I don't want to sound like I think you should manipulate your husband, but would being around a cute baby/toddler help his brain listen to his heart? Do your best to help your heart and brain have an honest conversation to accept his valid points, but maybe also offer to babysit a cute baby for an evening he's home. Let him hold baby while you make supper and see if this sparks anything. Of course, an evening full of diapers, spit-up, and flying peas could make you both see the beauty of three kids!

I don't mind much gushing, but I have a few people in my feed who always seem to have the subtext, "if you are married/have kids and aren't overflowing with happiness like me, you must be doing it wrong. And I'm happy to tell you what you are doing wrong." Generally there are pictures of perfectly plated meals with lots of vegetables to accompany a faux-humble post at least once a week from those folks, or links to articles like "One hundred things never to say to your husband" My husband is great and we are in love, but if he had thought I was.perfect I wouldn't have married him, and he would say the same of me. We do complement each other close to perfectly, though.