It's a small world. :)

Welcome! It was our favorite part of the dance show dd did last summer (and the only one she wasn't playing music for). :001_cool:

I have no idea why. .

The FAFSA is a joke. My oldest ds was accepted at an expensive school. The FAFSA said we were able to pay X amount and the government would give us Y amount in loans (half subsidized and half not). The school said they would give us Z in scholarships…with all that added up, there was still a ridiculous amount left over that we or ds would have had to take out loans to cover which would have left us or him in around $250,000 debt after 4 years of school (not counting the government loans). X amount (the EFC) was a lot more than we felt comfortable paying…we would have to hope nothing major happened in those four years like a hot water heater going or a car breaking, limit our other children's activities, and save nothing toward retirement. Needless to say, oldest ds did not go to that college.

I agree with the previous poster who suggested speaking to the teacher, as a friend. Let him know the current arrangement is not working for your family and if you want to continue with him and feel he works well with your ds (though from your post it seems he doesn't) suggest solutions that may make the situation better for you (ie. a text if not going to show at the very least). If he isn't working well with your ds, I'd find a new teacher and let him know these are the reasons you need to find a more reliable teacher. One of the people who helps dd with her music, not a regular teacher, can at times be a bit flaky with lessons. My dd really loves this person and they have a great rapport so I figured out that texting her the day of the lessons "to confirm" helped. Either she'd text back to let me know something came up or would remember the lesson. Either way I wasn't waiting around for a lesson that wasn't going to happen.

Our summer…one week of fiddle camp, one week music/dance stage show camp, some travel for CD release gigs and festivals. In between all that some violin lessons, fiddle lessons, continuing some school-French with tutor, finish up geometry online class, finish up biology curriculum.

I have two kids who compete or competed but only one is competitive. My dd competes in fiddling. She does extremely well, has won the world championship, but not because she is competitive. She is highly motivated to play well, loves to practice, and loves the music. When she competes, she looks at it as doing her own personal best rather than worrying about what her competitors might do or who might win. Competing is secondary to the other benefits of doing the competitions…hanging out with friends, travel she gets to do to continue to the next level, people she meets, etc… She fell into it accidentally, kind of. She fell in love with fiddle music and started learning it herself, then I found her a teacher because she wanted more and I knew nothing about it. Eventually the teacher suggested she go to her first competition to meet other kids who play well. She was six at the time, the competition age group was under 12. She won. We went to Ireland for the next level because I thought her winning the qualifier was a fluke and we might not get the chance to go again. That was 7 years, and 6 trips to Ireland, ago. I'll answer your questions about my oldest ds who was a competitive wrestler through high school. First, just for conversation and inspiration may I ask what your kids compete at and how your kids got started in it? Wrestling. My younger brother wrestled and ds was very small for his age and was interested in wrestling from watching his uncle so it seemed like a logical choice. Was this activity their first choice or was it secondary based on other factors (such as cost, convenience, time constraints, etc) First choice was wrestling though I also put him in taekwondo secondarily and he also competed in that for a few years. When did they decide to pursue it competitively? He started wrestling at 5yo and competed right away at the recreational level. When he was about 7 or 8yo, he decided he wanted to pursue it at a club level year round. How does a parent that doesn't know anything about "The Life" get their child started in competing? I knew a little about wrestling. I watched practices, helped him practice at home, and learned to coach him. How can an inexperienced parent best support a child's endeavor at competition? Give them a hug when they compete whether they win or lose. Let the child's interest be your guide. Find coaches/mentors who stress sportsmanship and personal development rather than only winning. Any recommended books or websites to check out? Depends on the activity. Is there an online community similar to this one about Activity X that you know of? Please share? For wrestling, there are lots of online places to watch matches such as themat.com Where do your kids find their peers--those that understand and appreciate their passion? At practices and weekends spent at tournaments. The boys will sit in the bleachers playing together, go out on the mat and try to pin each other, shake hands and go back up into the bleachers to play some more. How do you find programs for your young performer/athlete/scholar/card thrower/under water basket weaver that align with their goals? A lot of searching, talking to people involved in the activities, and being willing to travel as far as it takes.

My dd's teacher has all her students memorize their pieces for recital (actually all their pieces) from the youngest beginner through the teens headed off to college. There are a few times when using music is appropriate such as orchestra, when performing with an ensemble, or when playing a sonata with piano (for some reason when the pianist is using the music it was preferable for dd to have the music as well though it was for show since she had it memorized anyway). Generally, not always, recital pieces chosen in the studio are "old friends" to allow musicality to show.

Congratulations! So glad all your hard work paid off, Ruth! Looking forward to hearing stories from the next chapter in your son's life!

Most of the people in my Dd's tribe do drink…in the pubs where she hangs out and plays music with them. :laugh:

Clean house. No one else would clean as well as I would but the boys are good mowers.

I don't know anything about particle physics but has she tried contacting any of the authors of the books she's read to ask a question or discuss something she's read? Do you have a university nearby where people study particle physics? Magazines related to it with advertisements for conferences or other places people meet up to discuss related topics? Maybe find a mentor who would enjoy helping a young person and might know of other young people she could get to know? Finding a "tribe" can be difficult if your kid isn't into one of your area's big teen activities.

I am having a hard time adding text with the photo. This little guy my ds took a photo of lives in the umbrella holder tube on our patio table. Every morning he croaks for a couple hours and sounds like some sort of pre-historic bird amplified by the tube. We've tried putting him into the trees around the house but every night he finds his way back to the tube.

I try to instill healthy eating habits in my whole family by buying very, very few processed foods (now with the garden coming in there is very little in the house that is processed), all home-cooked meals, providing at least two vegetables at meals, keeping salad fixings, grilled chicken, and fruit in the refrigerator, cooking/baking with healthier alternatives (replacing fats with applesauce and sugars with honey, etc…). I do love to bake and can't always modify recipes but every little bit helps. I also can't be with the older ones every minute and the kids make their own money so can buy any junk they want so I do what I can at home. When we come up with a new, healthier recipe we share it with each other. My dd and I began a habit of walking a few miles together every other day. Not only is it a nice time to talk and enjoy the outdoors but we are getting exercise. I encourage her to find time to do some sort of physical activity daily…might be a walk, jumping on the trampoline, running with a dog, or learning a step from a dance video.

My oldest had a late birthday and was an early reader. He was also very active when bored. I had to chose between paying a lot of money for the private school that would allow him to start K early because he went to preschool there (whose teacher had no idea he could read after spending a year with him and also would have wanted him medicated for ADD), another year of preschool, or homeschool. I decided we'd try homeschooling and see how it went…that was 15 years ago. It went well.

I don't know that I want to see in black and white what we pay but here it goes…(there's no way I am going to add it all up for a total cost) This year has been a bit less expensive for extracurriculars than previous years because oldest ds is in college (though college costs have more than made up for any savings). My middle ds(17) works and plays music. He is self-teaching now after years of lessons so my only costs for him, besides travel costs that include both he and his sister, are for camps this summer totaling $2000. I do volunteer work to "pay" his tuition at one of the camps so we only pay room and board there. Dd(12) does music. She is my most expensive child. Classical violin lessons- This year was $45 for 90 min weekly not including gas, tolls, and often parking. (She was involved in a special program this year with a new teacher so this is much less expensive than lessons with her regular teacher. She will have 5 lessons with regular teacher this summer $110 for 90 min each and some practice sessions with her old practice partner for $45 for 90 min. She also did not do orchestra this year so less money output though she received scholarships for orchestra there were travel expenses.) Fiddle lessons- $50 per hour every other week. These lessons are 3 hours away so gas, tolls, and sometimes food if I don't plan ahead well add another $50 or so. I have no idea how much we have spent for travel to gigs…sometimes these expenses are paid by whoever has invited them and other times not. For the past six years we have spent about $3000+ per year to travel to Ireland for competition. Camps for her are about $2000 per year…at one she volunteers at camp to "pay" her own tuition now so only pay room and board which is minimal. We also attend live music events- sometimes we get comp tickets but not always though I have no idea how much we have spent this year. We buy CDs or mp3s, purchase sheet music she needs to learn or wants to learn, buy Irish music magazines, and pay expenses to belong to certain organizations and website maintenance costs. There is the cost of new strings ($82 every 3 months or so) and bow re-hair ($100 about once a year). This past year we had the added expense of a full size violin and bow (very expensive) and the kids also put out a recording for which we paid to mix and master though selling the recording has paid that money back now. We could not afford to do these things without me working. The kids help pay for some things as well.

I love the work I do. It is very rewarding work in so many ways...but financial reasons (and an inability to say "no" when my boss tells me there is no one available to provide services for a baby in need) have me working more hours than I would like at the moment. If the kids were not in the home still, the hours I work now would be perfect but it's a little stressful trying to homeschool and constantly rearrange my work for the kids' travel. So, I would continue to work unless we hit the lottery and I could spend my life traveling while volunteering to help children around the world with my skill set. Right now I would like to work a few less hours in a week.

Yes. That is why I added "families large and small raising their kids to be wonderful adults in their own ways." There are many, many ways to define success! I know a family who has adopted children with a variety of different diagnoses who would have grown up in orphanages in their various countries, a couple who would have been left to die had they not been brought to the US for life saving surgeries. They provide a loving home, medical care, necessary therapies, and the family members work and play with them each day. I used to love to go into their home at mealtimes and watch as each person in the family helped out with their own role to play. What might have looked like chaos was actually well orchestrated and when they all sat down for the prayer before their meal I was always amazed. I often had trouble getting a meal on the table for only three kids.

It is the first year we are allowed to cut it so the bounty is over. Two quiche and a couple stalks to snack on was all we got. Next year we get to cut it for a month.

Quiche…our asparagus is growing like crazy.

For the last two years my dd and I have attended a play/musical put together by homeschoolers in my area (Southern NJ, PA, etc..). Friends of ours participate which is how we learned about it. Both years, the musicals have been fantastic…live music, amazing singers, the acting, the sets, the costumes, the entire production!! I have been as entertained and impressed as I have been at professional musicals. I have no idea how many kids participate but they range from about 7 years old through high school and there are short bios for each of the participants in the program. All those families of successful homeschoolers!

My kids are 19, 17, and 12. They make their own breakfasts. There are plenty of options available and everyone likes something different. Occasionally, on a weekend or holiday or if we have overnight company, someone (kid or parent or some combination) might make everyone breakfast.

It seems whenever there is a lot of press about a homeschooling family it is negative. I know the majority of homeschoolers in our country are successfully schooling their children, sometimes above and beyond what the traditional public schools can provide. There are often posts on this board about homeschoolers who need help with votes for a story they've written or a project their involved in, posts about successful student athletes going off to college, homeschooling actors and musicians, horseback riders, gymnasts, dancers, amazing academic accomplishments, children doing volunteer and service projects…and families large and small raising their kids to be wonderful adults in their own ways. Two of my kids recently released their debut traditional Irish music CD in March and a track on their CD, along with an online release article appeared on www.TradConnect.com. Their track ranked #1 on the website's Top 20 Traditional Tracks for April 2015 based on people listening to it throughout the month. If anyone would be willing to pop onto their article on the website and give their track a quick listen, it would help them stay on the chart. You can click on this link then scroll down and listen to the track if you'd like to help them. They work really hard on their music and love to play but are just starting out and don't have the same huge followings some of the more experienced musicians have. How about a positive thread about homeschoolers?

My family would survive. We can grow and preserve our own food, have chickens for protein, and are experienced campers. We all have survival skills training except dd, but we'd teach her quickly if the need arose. I probably enjoy no technology for awhile at least.

Having dd do a few online classes worked really well, one through EdX and a couple through Coursera. She likes to learn independently and taking a course online, taking notes from the lectures, then having prepared tests or even those with no tests worked well. We traveled quite often, almost once a month, but did a good job keeping up in every subject. Also found a French tutor and changed violin teachers which were both good moves. Dropping a couple activities that had once been regular helped lightened her load in those areas allowing her more time to pursue those things she really loves.