I don't think you are being unreasonable. It doesn't seem like that much work -- in fact, it sounds like each person has just a small amount of work, but your kitchen must look amazing every night if everyone does their small part! Some ideas: -It does seem reasonable to expect that you (or whomever is cooking) will put heavily soiled pans in to soak before the meal so as to make it easier for the pan washer. -Maybe your oldest child does need someone to show him how to do the job properly. If he does know how to do the job right, then I definitely think you are reasonable. He needs to learn to buckle down and just do it, regularly. -I would agree with rotating the chores, at least among the older two, IF the oldest has shown that he can indeed do the job properly and consistently. If he hasn't, then he needs to practice more until he does. -My kids were offered the chance to rotate chores (one empties the dishwasher and feeds the cats in the morning; the other empties trash cans around the house and takes out the trash, recycling, and compost bucket), and they declined. They'd rather do the same thing every day. And like a PP said, who cares? Monotonous or not, chores still need to be done. -What about having one person rotate out each night and read to the cleanup crew instead of cleaning? Would be a bit more fun, and everyone could have a cleanup break every few days. (Or put on a good audio book.)

That is wonderful!

We do not say the pledge in our homeschool. Our co-op starts with it, though (well, after the prayer). I have vaguely uncomfortable feelings about the pledge. . . I support my country and consider myself to be a patriotic American, but somehow, pledging allegiance to a country instead of directly to God (even though God is mentioned in the pledge) makes me somewhat uncomfortable. I do not object to my children saying it or not saying it at co-op and other places; I have told them that it is up to them either way.

Can I please make my vote, "I prefer Liam Neeson as Aslan, and Return of the King beats Return of the Jedi any day?" Or maybe, "I don't care which is better. I'm just so ridiculously sick of Everything Star Wars All The Time. Mommy thought she was tired of the Narnia and Lord of the Rings obessions, but they pale in comparison to the Star Wars one." I think my children would vote for Return of the Jedi. I think Revenge of the Sith would be their least favorite, and I agree -- it's too dark and depressing. I didn't dislike The Phantom Menace, and young Anakin is adorable, but I really, really cannot stand Jar Jar Binks. At all.

Rainefox, I grew up around Meadville. . . went to school at Conneaut Lake Elementary. . . have fond memories of going to the "big" Meadville library (as opposed to the super tiny Conneaut Lake one). . . that was almost 30 years ago though. We took the kids (well, the two we had then, anyway) there three years ago to show them where Mommy grew up and spent a day in Erie -- fun place, would love to go back there (or move there)! I don't mind a PM if you have more questions, HSLover -- I hope you find just the right place to live and everything!

I would be looking into things like MI Paste to help remineralize the teeth, as well as xylitol to kill the mouth bacteria that cause cavities. If you go to mothering.com, in the dental forum, there are lots of threads about healing tooth decay. I would not be using fluoridated water. I might consider fluoridated toothpaste but not water.

If something happened to my husband, I'd sell what I could (including the house, if possible), take the children (and necessities/heirlooms), and move in with my parents. There's no question that they would take us in; in fact, they'd expect it. (And my ILs live ten minutes from my parents, so I'd have plenty of help/support -- except for not having DH, I'd actually have more help than I have now, since they're all several hours away.) I would probably be able to stay home full-time for at least a while, which would get my littlest two out of the baby stage, but I'm pretty sure my parents would work with us while I worked or went back to school, and I also think they'd be willing to help with homeschooling -- they don't really want me to have to put my children in public school either. I do have a college degree (and a real estate sales license -- not that that would be very useful right now, LOL), but I think I'd be inclined to go to nursing school if I was going back, or something else in the medical field.

We've been using wood in an outdoor furnace for four winters, and we love it. It heats beautifully, and while it does need some electricity (we have a backup generator but have not had to use it yet), it also heats our hot water in the winter, so I think DH said that that negates at least some of the electricity cost (hot water tank is electric). DH gets a load of firewood periodically in the warmer weather and has it chopped into manageable chunks. Then in the winter, he takes 5-10 minutes every day when he gets home from work and chops it into smaller pieces and fills the furnace. Sometimes he doesn't even need to fill it every day, though in the very coldest months, occasionally he will need to check it twice a day. If we go away, we set the furnace to a low setting, so that it stays on enough to keep the pipes from freezing, and if it's more than about three days, we have a neighbor boy come fill it. (We do keep a small amount of oil in the indoor furnace, just in case of emergency, though.) Really, the outdoor furnace is great! It's expensive to start, but compared to our other option, which is oil, it will pay for itself before it wears out (supposed to last about 25 years). No issues with allergies or smoke in the house, like we could possibly have with a woodstove. ETA: Yes, DH does sometimes have to stomp through snow, which is a pain. He says it's a lot of work. It is. When he was away for several days in lots of snow, I had to fill it, and even with him having left some near the furnace for me, it was still a lot of work. You need to find a balance between keeping the stored wood away from the house because of termites, but you want the wood fairly close to the furnace. Plan that carefully!

I have a gmail account, and so does DH. When I set up Google Calendar, I set it to share with DH, and he can make changes to it also. (Otherwise, it's set to private; he and I should be the only ones who can see it.) Each member of the family has his/her own color, plus there is a color for family events, and a color for birthdays/anniversaries outside of our immediate family (nieces, etc.). Ballet classes, dental appointments, stuff like that go under each person's specific color; playground days with the co-op, visitors coming for the weekend, etc. go under the color for family events. So at any time, either DH or I can look at the calendar and see what's going on and who is affected by a particular event. I also set it to remind me, via e-mail, anywhere from a day to a week in advance of bills due, appointments, co-op, whatever. I don't have it do reminder e-mails for things that are weekly, like ballet class. And there is room to write notes about location, or stuff I need to bring, as well. I really, really like the Google Calendar. (I do have a calendar in the kitchen, but we rarely write anything on it; it's mostly just for reference. Sometimes DH and I will discuss a busy upcoming few months and will jot notes on that calendar, since it's right there. At this time, I also don't have a portable calendar, but maybe I will need one in a few years if our schedules become more full.)

Congratulations! You sound like a very proud mama and grandma!

Our group does a similar thing; each spring, they host a portfolio share, where people can view each other's portfolios, ask questions, see how to meet the law's requirements with what they do naturally, etc. Our evaluator is also happy to answer any questions about the paperwork. Best thing to do is to ask!

Most things are communal after a bit, meaning that they can't tell someone else they can't play with them. The exceptions are brand-new items, or DD's American Girl dolls (we keep those in her room, because I don't trust a 2yo not to mess with them inappropriately), or Lego creations (those are generally put up where they're not easily reached by the 2yo).

In your situation, yes, I think I would refi.

I don't know if they'll have the type you want or not, but I know my DH wears a long/tall shirt and has had good success with ordering long/tall from Cabela's. He says they are indeed longer than the regulars. (And at least the chamois shirts from there have been worth the money, as they've lasted several seasons each, and my DH is not gentle on clothes.)

I fix three meals a day, plus snacks. But my older children can and do sometimes start oatmeal or eggs or make sandwiches or get snacks. If they do, it's for everyone.

Okay, it really isn't that bad! The biggest concern is the local school district. If you have any choice about where you live, ask around about the local district(s) -- find one that is friendly to the homeschoolers. Yes, you have to have an evaluation every year, but you get to choose your evaluator from a list of approved ones, so of course, you'll find someone whose philosophy fits with yours. Our evaluator is also a good friend and our co-op leader, so she knows our family, but our evaluation this year consisted of an hour or so of DD and me sitting with the evaluator and going through samples of work, test scores (only needed in certain grades -- and you could consider skipping those grades if you wanted), lists of books we'd read, etc. Very low pressure, no big deal at all. Then I took the paper from the evaluator and our portfolio and submitted it to the school district. Just some hoops to jump through but no big deal. As for the medical, dental, etc., PA allows religious and philosophical exemptions for those things. Even if you do some or all of them, you can still submit the exemption. No letter from a pastor or anything is needed; you just simply state on a piece of paper something like, "I am the legal guardian of Child's Name, and I object to the following procedures on the basis of a religious belief or philosophical belief similar to a religious belief." Then write the procedures, put a check by them, and sign it. Exact wording can be found on Pauline's site.

I think agreeing that he can ride home on Wednesday would be a good compromise. That way, your son knows that you are okay with him coming home, and that you support and validate his feelings, but you're also giving him a chance to get used to it and decide he's okay. I was a camp counselor for many years, and I've seen kids have a rough time the first couple of nights and then get into the swing of things and be fine. Sometimes they just need a couple of days to get used to being away from home. Choosing to come home or not come home on Wednesday puts the ball in his court too.

I would really have to have NO other options before I would go back to work and put my older two in public school. It would not be a good fit at all for my bright, active, probably ADHD child, nor my sweet, shy child who needs to do things at his own pace. I'd probably rather move in with family before I would go back to work. In addition, I'd have to pay for daycare for an infant and a 3yo, and that would probably eat up a huge portion of any paycheck, as would gas costs, since we're 10 miles from anywhere. Now, if I could get an evening job in a bit when the baby is older, maybe. We're not quite at that point yet though.

Our year runs from July 1 to June 30. I like to do more schoolwork in the summer and winter, so that we have more time for playing outside and stuff in the spring and fall. We just generally do school most days, unless we have something else specifically scheduled. We'll take a break when we need one, when there's an opportunity to do something unusual, when relatives come to visit, etc., but starting July 1 (the earliest our state lets us start) lets us have plenty of flexibility while still getting our required 180 days. This year, I am planning to stop at Thanksgiving and not pick up again until New Year's, at least with our regular academics; I'd like to leave plenty of time for crafting and Christmas reading and such like that. (It will count as school time, just different stuff.)

Yes, this. I think the more unusual a name, the greater the possibility that people may view that person in a particular way, whereas with the more common/traditional names, people know enough other people with those names that there is not necessarily a preconceived notion of how people with those names are. I've known Saras of all types, for instance, but not so many Dweezils -- if I'd ever met one Dweezil, that one person might tend to color my view of all future people named Dweezil, however unintentionally. (Then again, DH, I, and all four children have very traditional names, all but one being Biblical, so take my opinion with a grain of salt.)

I've always hated carrying a purse, so I was glad when I was able to switch to a diaper bag that holds my wallet, keys, etc. I do not carry a separate purse in addition to the diaper bag, though I do have a couple of small purses that I use for just the wallet, keys, phone, etc. when I go out without a small child in tow (which currently is never).

Chickpea curry -- use coconut milk. Minestrone soup -- veggies, tomato juice, pasta, beans. (I use some beef broth as well, but you could skip that.) Pasta with lentils. Beans and rice. Black beans used in enchiladas or stuffed peppers, or as refried beans. Rigatoni with tomatoes, white beans, and spinach, and some spices (red pepper, not sure what else is in the recipe). Lots of beans. :)

I have lent out curriculum (and craft books and other stuff) to friends that I trust, and I have borrowed things myself. If I were to damage something that was lent to me, I would replace it, and I would expect that someone else would do the same. At the same time, I understand that things I lend out may not come back in exactly the same condition, and that's a risk I take; if it's that precious to me, I wouldn't lend it out. I also wouldn't borrow something that I could not afford to replace if I damaged it. Our co-op has a lending library, and we've started asking for a deposit for certain, expensive items. The deposit is just a check for a significant portion of the item's cost, dated for the return date; I (the librarian) hold on to the checks and won't deposit them unless the item is lost or damaged and not returned/replaced.

I'm thinking that she's just assuming you'd rather be able to help your DH with the rest of your children and therefore you'd rather not be at the head table. I know I'd prefer to be with my DH and children myself! And realistically, when DH was in his sister's wedding, that left me to keep an eye on our 3yo and our 4-month-old by myself, in a place I didn't know. Thankfully, my parents were there and were able to lend me a hand, and DH was with me at the reception, just not the time before the wedding. He would greatly appreciate having my help with the whole crew during a sit-down reception, so maybe that's what your sister is thinking.

Where the birth actually was. For my DD, the state (er, Commonwealth) recorded the county of her birth as the actual county where the birth center was, not the county in which we lived at the time.