I've enjoyed the bbc Luther, it's not Sherlock but it does scratch the different/clever/edgy detective with a good cast itch.

Oh congratulations, he's so sweet!

Congratulations @wisdomandtreasures!! Hope you and bub are doing well! You can tell your kids that I was way meaner. I had a caesar last November AND I was on bedrest for a month beforehand AND dh made our kids - including the teens - skip everything & keep the household going. It was cleaner than usual 😆

The only way I know is to have such severe consequences that they are more gunshy. More behaviour modification than true character change. Eg, my sister has a much better relationship with our mother because I don't.

My only full sibling, a sister, is about 2 hours away. I am estranged from our mother, and she is estranged from our father, so no big family catch ups. We try to catch up every few months, though she hasn't bothered to visit me in the 5 months since I had a baby, and the month of bed rest before that, so I'm a bit meh about the whole thing right now. I've been far from a perfect sister either. We're just both busy and... different.

I agree with hour per grade but we usually top out at around 6 hours × 4 days a week plus another hour or two car schooling and plenty of unschooly/practical life stuff - eg my boys are helping dh tile our hallway this weekend.

I think 8th+ is a decent guideline My older kids read it as part of a class during covid, I think they were 8th & 10th and both loved it. My current 7th is a little more immature and I will probably wait until at least 9th grade.

I was thinking more about this ~classic infj lol The door slam is more of an acceptance of how things really are imo. Infjs love to help, love to have real, deep, authentic relationships. If it is shown that we can't help or improve the relationship, then we accept it and categorise it as such. I realised I'm contemplating it with someone at the moment, someone who is non-reciprocating, and it's very much an 'okay, I guess you've shown me how important this relationship is to you, I will re-categorise it like that and now you're in an outer-outer-circle, & more than that, your behaviour may improve and move you to an inner-outer circle one day, but the inner circle is closed to you, likely forever, because I have seen the real you and I can't trust it.'

I'm 38, I've been here a while (oldest is nearly 18) but I also just had a baby so I'll be around a while yet 😄

I think it goes with the loyalty. Because if you abuse my loyalty then I'm done. That's a boundary. I will be very loyal but if it's seriously burned then I will forgive and I will be kind but I won't trust you or let you close enough to do it again. D.o.n.e. I will probably dwell on it & wish things were different, but unless they show me that they understand their hurtful behaviour and show me that they are different, then I don't see how things can be different 🤷🏻‍♀️ I've had that conversation with my mother in law almost word for word. I'm infj, dh is intj & he has a much easier time shrugging off other people not agreeing/understanding.

Love it! Well done Elizabeth! Bet he's super squishy 🥰

I like to think deeply and make a carefully scheduled routine. Then I follow it strictly for about 2 weeks. By then, I've trained myself in the rhythm enough, and my rebellious nature is starting to get rankled (you can't tell me what to do, me-of-the-past!) that we become much more relaxed and go with the flow. It helps that most of my kids are old enough to be responsible for a chunk of their school work & chores. But our schedule is In.Sane. (dh works an 8 day week, with rotating day/night shifts, we drive 50-70+miles - one way - 3× a week, I run our homeschool group & I have a 4 month old baby) so I need a very precise mix of planning & flexibility & too-tired-to-care-right-now 😄 I don't know how we got so busy, I'm allergic to busy...

Thinking of you @cuckoomamma, you're not alone in dealing with stuff like this. I'm sorry. part of it is, I think, a kind of narcissism. Maybe a normal teen/young adult kind of narcissism. What I suspect, is that some highly emotional, narcissist-adjacent type people, feel that their current emotional state must be the truth, because it is so strong and because narcissists expect the world to mirror back their truth. This then gets replayed in their minds, laying down neural pathways with such strong emotional support, that they really believe their lies are true. I'm not a therapist nor a neuroscientist, so it's just a hunch based on reading + experience. If you figure out how to pull them out of such a spiral, preferably without imploding the rest of the family, please do let me know. Eta - social media exacerbates it, because it gives the illusion of being able to control their world/narrative, curate the people around them to only those they have convinced. And it erodes boundaries, which removes social fences (like, for example respect for parents) so the fairy tale can run completely out of control.

Beautiful babies! I hope your dd gets to bring them home soon. Congratulations to your family!

Wow, amazing! Thank you for sharing. I felt a real need to tell people my birth story to help process the whole experience. I hope you are doing okay, getting plenty of rest, enjoying not being pregnant! He's adorable 💙

That is so cool! Mine all looked like clones 😄

Oh hello little man! He is darling, such an expressive face 😄 does he look like his siblings? Well done Elizabeth he's beautiful!

Congratulations! Well done! Rest up and enjoy your little one 💙

Fun!

Yeah my #4 was born sunny side up, homebirth. Fun times 😅 I call him my backwards boy, he's my only left handed kid too 🤔 You'll be okay, that baby has to come sometime 😄

See, the stop-start thing would make me wonder a bit about position. Not that he's gone breech/transverse, but maybe he's not quite facing the right way yet? If you're happy with movements etc I personally wouldn't rush it. The labour I had that started like that and I pushed it with a sweep ended up being posterior & painful (but fine). Maybe some of the spinning babies exercises (the lying down one for posterior) might help? When I want to curl up in a dark corner is how I know it's time to go to the hospital 😅 Thinking of you. Whatever happens it can't be too long now!

Far out, I'd be very angry. I was annoyed when our neighbours legally burnt off but left some smouldering bits that the wind picked up. 7 fire trucks and a worse for wear tree and it was all fine.

Oooh exciting! Praying for you! Come on gorgeous little baby boy!

Boo, that stinks. I'm sorry.

Yeah, honestly, I was starting to worry when I was due because we're a good 40mins from hospital and had had driving rain for weeks, meaning it was touch & go whether we'd even be able to leave our property! We had roads closed due to flooding & damage. Crazy. And I'd nearly had a side of the road delivery with #3, he was fast, an experience I wasn't keen to repeat. The planned caesar (for other reasons) at least took that worry off my plate. All that to say, I get your worry and will keep you in prayer! Can you talk all of this over with the midwives?