My response is based on my own experience, so take it for what it is. 🙂 I despised my given first name from an early age. It never fit me. I asked my friends to call me a different name, which changed to different ones as I got older. I later found out that I was supposed to be named after a paternal great-grandmother, a name which I wasn't even aware of but loved the moment I heard it. That name would have fit me much better, but my mother balked at the last minute and named me one of the top names of that time, which was very generic and not me at all. I changed my name legally after I became an adult. It wasn't the great-grandmother's name, but it is much better nonetheless. I am much happier with it. It's difficult to explain, but while the parents may have indeed given great care in naming their child, that name may not be the right one for the child - from their own perspective. Since the child will have to live with that name, I think (from my own biased experience) that they should have the support of the family if they choose to change it. Changing the name does make it more challenging when obtaining documentation such as school transcripts, driver's licenses, etc. Remind the child to keep anything with their old name, even if it is not 100% official. They may one day need these document to prove they are who they are. Various entities are used to people changing last name such as in marriage, but proving first name change is far more difficult. Documents with photos help.

Thank you so much! This means a lot to me.

I would.

I probably would, and my family would as well unless we were aware of cleanliness issues. Apparently, quite a few people don't. We recently attended a potluck dessert. There were two home-made cake bar pans, including mine. The rest of the contributions were store-bought - doughnuts, chocolate cake, danishes, munchkins, etc. All the store-bought goodies were eaten, and the home-made remained untouched except for what my kids and one other person took. I thought it was interesting in the light of this thread.

This is a great topic, Ruth! Thank you for starting it! My perspective on being the Homeschool Parent In Charge has evolved over the years of homeschooling my kids, and will likely continue to do so as I graduate my oldest and continue working with my youngest. When my kids were little - preschoolers and early elementary age, I tried to be the fun teacher and searched high and wide for fun activities. I own tubs of various manipulatives, activities, games, kits, etc. This did not work at all. My kids are not interested in school as fun or experience. They see it as a means to an end, and now I do, too. I realized that the beautiful lapbooks, models of Pyramids, and Cuisinnaire rods were really just for me, made by me, and my kids were just grudgingly following along. It's actually quite freeing not to be doing those anymore. They simply don't need manipulatives or visuals; they see them as time wasters - the work takes longer If left to their own devices, my kids would spend their time gaming and possibly doing a bit of crafts. Interest-led is not a good fit here. I make my expectations clear and my kids know that they have to finish the assigned work, with excellence. One of the things I find myself saying the most is "if the the publisher didn't want you to do this math problem (paper, reading, etc.), it would not be in the book." We do lessons the way the curriculum provider designed them with very little (and usually no) change. Like 8FillTheHeart wrote, I think that there is no clear method that would work for either of my kids at any age. It even varies day to day. Some days my oldest needs to be prodded every 15 minutes to accomplish anything and others she gets all her school done before I even remember to ask. Overall, my parenting-teaching style is firm and academic. Neither of my kids is easy going. They require a firm hand or nothing will get done, but as they get older I see some glimmers of initiative and self-regulation. I try to cultivate those and step back a little until/unless they don't accomplish their goals.I need to provide firm structure for both. They need to know what is on the list for school each day so that they know when it is done.

Thank you so much to all who have replied! I really, truly appreciate your words. I don't want to be the person who ignores the situation. I especially appreciate the thoughts shared by those who have gone through this as caregivers or are going through it for their own illness or condition. It is so hard. I think that I really am afraid of saying the wrong thing, but I am starting to see that saying the wrong thing sometimes is still better than saying nothing. I am somewhat close to some of these dear people, but not to others. Some are more of a colleague situation, and I don't want to overstep boundaries or get too deep into their lives. I still want to listen, talk to them, and support in some way if they want it. Thank you all again. Your posts really help.

Hello dear Hive, It seems that so many people are seriously ill or terminally ill in my acquaintance. What do you say to a person who is not going to get better? What do you say to someone who is taking care of a terminally ill person who is also seriously ill themselves? What do you say when you see these people on a semi-regular basis for months or years? I find it so difficult. I want to show that I care, because I do, but I don't want to make it worse for them. The "get well soon" thing is just not going to work, nor will much optimism for the future. I would very much appreciate suggestions. Thank you in advance! ETA I help with meals and practical things. I am looking for ideas on what to say. Thank you!

You did it correctly. There are different ways to get it done, and if using a simple timer works for you, doesn't create any issues with the student such as timer anxiety, then it's perfectly fine. You are looking for progress as well as accuracy/speed. Over time, the speed should increase. By the end of 8/7, I think, my daughter did her speed drills in about 2 minutes or so.

We've rented cars in Europe and have never needed an international license, but you should check country rules just to be sure. As mentioned in other posts, definitely request an automatic if you are not comfortable with the manual shift. Someone mentioned that you need to look behind you as well as in front of you. What that meant to us in Germany (and other countries also, but Germany in particular) is this. On the Autobahn in places there is no official speed limit. In practical terms that means that there will probably be people who are driving faster than you, but this works well. If someone pulls up behind you, they will put on their left indicator signal, which means they are politely asking you to move over so they can pass. You move to your right, they zoom, and everyone is happy. It's easier to just keep right unless overtaking to be honest. When we rented our car last time in Germany, the rental company asked us not to take their vehicle into the Eastern European countries, which were all listed specifically on the rental agreement (such as Poland, etc). When we drove through Switzerland, the main thing that the border control cared about was the road tax decal. I think someone mentioned this upthread. Even though it was a rental vehicle, we had to buy the decal at the border control office. The decal is good for a year, I think, but we had to buy it anyway. It wasn't very expensive. As mentioned upthread, the road signs are excellent, particularly in Germany and Spain, but you need to know how to use them. Unlike the U.S., the signs do not show direction, i.e. South. Instead they show the next large city in that direction. Once you figure this out, it's easy. I like to have a paper map so I can trace the road and see what next big city is, and then we are good. Nav is a good thing to have, too. Some rental cars/companies have this. Request in advance just in case. I agree with taking full insurance, including scrapes and scratches. We didn't want to expose our own insurance. Your credit card company, as long as you rent the car with their card, may offer some insurance - check if it works in the countries you are visiting. Neuschwanstein Castle is beautiful, very much worth the visit. But. You won't get to see it the way it is shown on postcards. Those photos are taken by people who climbed a very steep mountain nearby. It is on a steep hill, and the last part of the climb is quite steep. At the bottom, there are (or were) notices to the effect, advising people with physical challenges to take a shuttle or a horse cart. When we visited the castle, it was snowing and the road was slippery. The shuttles were not running, although the castle was open to visitors. The horse carts were still operating, but the wait was long, so we just walked/climbed. It was quite a challenge, but we are not exactly in great shape. Since it was snowing, there was really no line to buy tickets. You have to wait for a tour in your language. We had to wait until there were enough people who wanted a tour in English. There were several groups that went before us that had Chinese language tour. ETA I forgot to mention that the same road/expressway can have different names or numbers. So on your Nav it may be called I5 or something, but what you see on the road sign in front of you is something like K28. This is normal - the same road has a EU name as well as a country name. This is where a paper map is useful because it shows both the EU and local country name for the road. It's confusing for the first hour maybe, but after that it's fine. ETA 2 In cities we mostly parked in underground garages or other garage-type structures. I never figured out how the on-street parking meters worked. 🙂

Oh, it's awful, isn't it? I get it like this sometimes when I am recovering from a bad cold and it can last for a few weeks. What helps me, and I know it probably sounds silly, but it really does help - is sipping apple juice through a straw from a kids juice box. The little straw is key - it makes me sip slowly, and there is something in the apple juice that soothes my throat enough to stop closing up and settle. Sometimes I need two juice boxes, but usually just the one. I now keep some juice boxes in the house just for this. My mother carries a small thermos bottle of hot water with her everywhere as she is prone to sudden coughing fits. Sipping hot (as hot as you can handle) water helps her. Big hugs, I know what this is like.

I cut out a small piece of Telfa non-adhesive dressing and slide the rest of the Telfa piece carefully inside its covering and store in a ziplock bag. This is instead of gauze. Then I cut out small strips of Hypafix (there is a grid line printed on the adhesive covering ) to keep the Telfa in place. I find that it works well. There's also Hypafix Gentle Touch for extremely fragile and sensitive skin, but I have no personal experience with that type. I can tolerate regular band-aids for short periods of time, but for anything requiring a longer period of time I use the above combination.

If you don't feel like driving, or even just to look at itineraries to get some ideas, I recommend Rabbie's Tours. They leave from Edinburgh and are really good. My husband and I visited Edinburgh a few years ago and took two of their tours. We love history and nature, and we enjoyed the Loch Lomond and castles tours. Our guide was fantastic, and we got to see amazing things. What I like is that the tour coach is small - it can only handle fewer than 20 people, and because of that the company can take you places that regular sized buses simply can't fit - smaller roads, old local pubs for lunch, etc. Our guide sat with us for one of the meals (you choose, order, and pay for what you want), and it was great to chat with him. We only did the day tours, and I don't know what their overnight tours are like. We went in early March, and yea, rain gear is a must, but don't let the weather deter you from doing things. I don't know the ages of your children, but I think they only take kids aged 5 and over, that's the only thing to really know. Oh, and they leave promptly on time, so you need to be there about 15-20 minutes early. ETA As I was writing this post, I was flooded with great memories. One of the most fun ones was making an acquaintance with Hamish, the Hairy Coo on our tour. We stopped ... somewhere..I can't remember exactly... on the way from Stirling Castle. It was clearly a touristy spot, but it was fun and understated. Here's a link to a blog post (not mine, don't know the author) with some pictures if you are not familiar with these animals.

I would go with bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction. I would not want to go through chemo, surgery, and potentially radiation more than once if I could help it. The nurse was wrong to tell you that implants need to be replaced every 10 years. That was the case in the 1960s and some of the 1970s. The current implants have a rate of approximately 6% to 12% rupture in 10 years based on clinical studies and depending on manufacturer. The article quoted below has failure rates for multiple manufactures, this is just a sample: "A 9-year average core study of Sientra cohesive gel implants published in 2016 consisted of 1,788 patients with an MRI cohort of 571 patients. The 8 years MRI cohort rupture rates were: 6.4% for primary augmentation, 5.2% for revision augmentation, 2.8% for primary reconstruction and revision reconstruction data is not currently available. Additionally, rupture rates in the 10 years MRI cohort for primary augmentation was 9.0% " source: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5409893/ There are no issues with imaging of the implants themselves. They do not impede MRI or other scans. They are imaged on a regular schedule to check for integrity. If you were to choose a flap-type reconstruction, it can be easier to recover if the tissue is taken from the back rather than the abdomen according to an acquaintance who's had both types of flap surgery done. Please note, however, that the flap surgery may need to be done twice to achieve the desired look because cells tend to die at rather high rate.

I was at work, in an office building a bit away from downtown, around 18th Street or so. We had an amazing wall of windows overlooking the downtown and the Twin Towers. At some point I got a text or a message saying that something was happening with the Towers. I thought to myself, no way, I can see them! Then I looked up. Just at that moment, the second plane hit the tower. It was surreal to watch. Somehow my brain supplied that it was there to help, but of course that was not the case. After that, my memories are in snippets. My coworker on the floor, crying hysterically. All the subways open, free of charge, all trains leaving the city. Everyone just walking away, away from downtown, in a daze. Some people covered in soot. Every once in a while we would all turn back and just look. The towers were still standing then. One of the towers collapsing, the top section sailing down, intact for a while, before breaking apart. Fighter jets in the sky, with a vague thought of I hope they are ours. I don't remember exactly how I got home, but it was ok somehow. There was no work the next day. My husband and I went back a couple of days later as his company was helping set up a counseling center on Pier.. something, I don't remember. We had to get passes and went through a Federal command center or something like that. All the major agencies set up in one giant space, with telecom reps and all utilities. Very organized. Got spare phone batteries, all charged from the phone company. Setting up computers in booths that were already set up with desks, chairs, and tissue boxes. A food area set up, piled up high with donations. That was incredible, that part. There were plates of home-made peanut butter sandwiches next to fancy catering boxes. You just took what you needed and went to work. Smoke. Lots of dark and then later white smoke. Had a friend who worked in one of the financial center buildings. He was late to work and missed the attack. Should have been there. Have neighbors who did not come home.

You may find it helpful to have a packing list, organized by category, something like this: Shelter -tent - tarp (for under the tent, make sure nothing is sticking out, or you can get a puddle under the tent) - mallet or hammer or something to pound the tent stakes in - nice to have - a little broom/dustpan - tents seem to get tons of dust and sand Kitchen - stove with gas canister - cooking pans/utensils - eating dishes, utensils - trash bags - some way to wash dishes like a dish pan, dishwashing liquid, dish towel Food (organized by day) - cooler with reusable ice packs or ice (if food is perishable) - day 1 lunch (sandwich bread, peanut butter... - whatever you like) - day 1 dinner (the meal you are planning) - day 1 snacks (trail mix, granola bars, etc. that you like) - day 2 breakfast (eggs, cereal, bagels, whatever the plan is - remember any tea/coffee/hot chocolate/sugar/salt/ketchup, etc.) - day 2 lunch and so on Water - either water container to fill on site or enough water for drinking, brushing teeth, dishes, etc. Light - headlamps/flash lights for each person plus at least one lantern with extra batteries as needed Safety - first aid kit - bug spray - sun screen - tick removal tool if it's an issue in your area - prescription meds - over the counter meds like Tylenol or whatnot if not in first aid kit Bedding - sleeping bags - blow up mattress/sleeping pad as needed with any tools needed to blow them up - pillows Sanitation/Showers - toiletries - towels - shower shoes (flip flops - yikes, you don't want to stand on that floor barefoot!) Clothes and Shoes - remember sun hats or caps - whatever clothes you need for the time you will be out Nice to have - some kind of camping chair, although the picnic table may be enough - some way to hang up towels like a camping clothes line, but can do without usually

Be on the lookout for ringworm. My friend added a new kitty about a year ago, and the shelter swore he was free of parasites, etc. The symptoms started about a week after the new kitty was introduced to the resident kitty in the home, was petted, carried around, and handled. The humans came down with it, too. The entire household, animal and human, had to be treated for ringworm, and it took a while for it to clear.

We use this nail repair kit. It might be cheaper at your local Target or CVS or something. You paint the nail with their polish, dip into powder, and then file down to relative smoothness when the powder sets. Works rather well.

My daughter puffy heart loved Memoria Press Astronomy in 3rd grade. She loved it so much that she begged me to do it the second time, and did it all by herself. She is a workbook, get-er-done person, and she enjoyed filling out constellations, memorizing star names, and going back and forth between the astronomy book and her D'Aulare's (sp?) Greek Mythology book. She used to draw constellations with chalk on the sidewalk, which looked very impressive, and talked to everyone and anyone about the different constellations visible in the sky each season. She can't do the constellations anymore, after 5 years, but she still remembers seasons, stars, major constellation locations in the sky, and star classification.

Yes! It's definitely possible. In my case, I started to feel... I don't know... stupid I guess. It's not a good description, but I had trouble focusing and retaining material. I went to graduate school at that point and my "academic brain" came back quickly. :) But for you, I recommend trying a purposeful reading strategy. If we just read text, most of us will forget the majority of what we read even if the text is something like a high interest novel. If you read with a purpose it is much easier to not only understand what the text is saying, but also to remember and make connections with other things you already know. My favorite reading method is called SQ3R, if you haven't come across it before. There are many websites that describe it and also videos. Here is a link to a short version https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dhcSP_Myjg and another, longer one https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Ui2mpPDP7E

Would he be willing/interested in working in corporate law? He could do things like read contracts, work on employee litigation (wrongful termination, etc.), or perhaps focus on intellectual property (trademarks, patents, etc.). He would probably need to take some continuing education courses, but that should not be as intense as studying for his degree. And then he could just apply for jobs.

We used to belong to a CSA for two or three years. It was most definitely not cost-effective (quite expensive even compared to farmer's market), but the quality of produce was excellent and we did get to try vegetables we would not have eat otherwise. Our CSA ran from early May through the end October. The best produce was naturally toward the end of summer and early fall while the spring was mainly different types of lettuce, radishes, and other greens. We don't eat that many greens, and quite a bit of those were not eaten. In the summer we got things like gooseberries, red and black currants, tomatoes, eggplant, etc. We loved the fruit part of the share, but there wasn't quite enough of it and too much lettuce. The main reason we stopped was the inconvenience. It was too far to drive to pick it up.

Hi, I can't tell you which program to try, but I can describe what it's like to use Novare's Introductory Physics. Actually, we have their secular version, but it is pretty much the same text minus the religious teaching. This is a mastery program, and it requires a good amount of memorization. With the full package you get a CD with a suggested schedule, quizzes, study guides, labs, etc. The schedule will tell you which sections of the text to assign each day, when to give the student their weekly review guide, when to do chapter exercises, etc. Each week there are flash cards to make and study, reading, and some days there are quizzes or review. Material is cumulative, which is what leads to mastery - even though you may have learned the scientific inquiry process in the first two weeks, it will keep showing up in quizzes in some way or another. Same goes for all the other material, which I like. You'll be memorizing things like equations, major theories, scientists (who, what, when, why important), conversion factors and prefixes, speed of light in vacuum, etc. This program can be done at the same time as Algebra 1, but the student needs to be able to manipulate simple equations to get them to the form they need. So, given F=m*a, they will need to be comfortable with rewriting it to solve for m for example. Unit conversions are also important. Setting up problems properly, showing work, writing full sentences for explanations, using correct grammar and spelling are all important. That is explained in grading rubrics. This is not a hands-on program like Rainbow, but it does include 4 labs. These are 4 full on, proper labs, not demonstrations. If you buy the lab guide, it will teach you how to keep a real lab notebook, set up the hypothesis, write out materials, procedure, etc. Then you will be collecting data, plotting it in Excel, analyzing margin of error, etc. Some of the labs require expensive materials. We are not doing those. Some can be done with mostly household or easy to get items. Home Science Tools website does sell the kit if you are interested. So, this is a rigorous, no-nonsense, well-written program with clear explanations in the text, no fluff, and high standards for output. It would likely not work for your younger at this stage, but might be good for your older.

This. We had cake, and I think we fed each other a small bite, but there was definitely no cake smashing. Our wedding was small, but the whole preparation process and the wedding itself was so stressful. I was so disappointed to be dictated whom to invite, how long our engagement should last, "what people would think",etc. If I was older and more confident in myself, I would have insisted on a simple church wedding with no formal reception whatsoever, and I'm pretty sure my husband would have preferred that, too. I think I would have been happy to just get changed out of my dress and go out for lunch with a few friends. Honestly, the best part of the wedding was when it was over. Still happily married after 21 years.

It doesn't really make sense because I don't have synesthesia, but I found this video that made it more accessible. I don't have a VR set, and it probably looks much better with one, but even without it I think the video does a really good job showing what a person with synesthesia would experience. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=obrBAysVef0

On May 23, 2019, ALDI, in association with ADM Milling Co., recalled 5-lb. bags of Baker’s Corner All Purpose Flour because they may be contaminated with E. coli. Recalled flour was sold at retail locations in the following states: Connecticut, Delaware, Massachussetts, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New York, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, Vermont, and West Virginia. Consumers should not use any of the recalled flour and should throw recalled flour away. If you stored flour purchased from ALDI in another container without the packaging and don’t remember the brand or “better by” date, throw it away. Consumers should thoroughly wash the containers before using them again. https://www.cdc.gov/ecoli/2019/flour-05-19/index.html