LucyStoner Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 I have a dear friend who is going through a scary time with cancer. Major surgery followed by chemo. She’s waiting on her follow up scan. This is the third time she’s had cancer and it’s a new type for her. She’s in her 50s, single mom of one young adult child. I talked to her for a long time tonight and it’s clear she’s really struggling. She doesn’t have the biggest support system- very little family + she works a lot so not a lot of time for friends and other relationships. She works a lot of hours but work is her happy place and as a single mom with tuition to pay, the extra money doesn’t hurt. Because she works so much + her general personality, some of my go to gifts for this situation don’t work. For instance, she’s not going to want to go to a spa and she doesn’t have much in the way of free time. She lives in a small space which is very neat and tidy so cleaning service isn’t as much help as you’d think. I sense that she wouldn’t want someone she doesn’t know cleaning anything in her apartment. I want to get her a gift that will communicate that we are here for her and isn’t generic. I appreciate any ideas. Thanks! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bookbard Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 I think a really nice, soft blanket would be good. My sister bought me a nice blanket ten years ago and I am sitting in it on the couch right now. I usually buy the cheapest of things and so nothing lasts. But this is obviously expensive and looks good left on the couch. A soft one you could wrap around yourself would be comforting and remind you that someone cares. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmilyGF Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 What about a meal subscription for a few weeks? If she has very little time and very little support network, would that help give her a bit more leisure time? Emily 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 3 hours ago, bookbard said: I think a really nice, soft blanket would be good. My sister bought me a nice blanket ten years ago and I am sitting in it on the couch right now. I usually buy the cheapest of things and so nothing lasts. But this is obviously expensive and looks good left on the couch. A soft one you could wrap around yourself would be comforting and remind you that someone cares. 18 minutes ago, EmilyGF said: What about a meal subscription for a few weeks? If she has very little time and very little support network, would that help give her a bit more leisure time? Emily I vote for both of these ideas. One is emotional, one is practical. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheReader Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 We've ordered food from a nearby restaurant to be delivered to people in situations like that before, and it's always really appreciated. Maybe something like that? Or the blanket/meal subscription would be good. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GoVanGogh Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 I gave my friend going through cancer some really nice, cozy lounge wear-type pajamas. She said she loved them and that she wore them to chemo. I like the idea of one practical and one emotional gift, as Scarlett said. If that is within budget. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kassia Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 We gave my SIL a very soft fleece hat from Lands' End to keep her head warm when her hair fell out. She wore that hat for years until she died. I've heard that they are not made as soft as they used to be and I've heard that some people are very particular about what they want to wear though. I got a gift certificate for a friend a few years ago for a place that makes hats specifically for chemo patients and she said she found one she really liked. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MercyA Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 I really like the blanket idea. Something very plush, very soft, maybe in a favorite color or motif. She will feel your love and support when she wraps up in it and it will give her a bit of pampering. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forget-Me-Not Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 I agree: blankets, soft things to wear. And a cheerful handwritten card dropped in the mail to her every few days and regular phone calls would probably mean the world to her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wisdomandtreasures Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 Definitely go with food! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halftime Hope Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 I don't have any great ideas, but I have to say that this is one of the kindest posts I've read in a long time. When someone gets a cancer diagnosis, people often don't know how to respond with "here-ness" and one finds out who their few true friends are. You've encouraged me today. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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