Crazy illogical things our dc insist are true

[teachermom2834]

My dd is 13 yo, generally compliant and reasonable and sweet. She is in a performance this weekend and we were in the store getting all the makeup and odds and ends she would need. I asked her if she needed anything else. She said “I could use new hair gel since I’m still using the same bottle from my first Nutcracker when I was 5.” 
 

That was 2013. She has been in 2-3 shows each year since then with multiple performances of each and dress rehearsals and practice runs of hair and makeup at home. Probably 100 times she has done her hair and needed hair gel. 
 

It is not the same bottle. I don’t know why she thinks that. But she is pretty certain. And she is probably telling her friends her mom won’t buy her new hair gel. 
 

Yes, eight years ago I bought a special bottomless regenerating 8 oz tube of hair gel. Sounds perfectly reasonable. 

[Katy]

I don’t know but I’d get her a new bottle and write the opened date on it with a sharpie.  I think liquid types of fluids not used near the eyes generally expire a year after they’re opened. 

[teachermom2834]

I did get her a new bottle. And even when we got home she said “I looked and I have plenty. I guess I didn’t need it.”

But honestly, expired hair gel is something I’m not going to worry about. I just found it amusing that she was so positive something so wrong was correct. Kids are silly. 

[Tenaj]

🤣🤣. Eerily similar conversation here last week.  I had our the bottle of Tabasco Sauce on the table and my 16 year old made some comment about how that bottle had been around since before he was born 🤣🤣.  I argued that we go through it much faster than that but I always buy the same brand so it just looks the same.  He argued and argued with me.  I tried to prove it by looking it up on Amazon and wouldn't you know, the bottles there were slightly different than mine so it just convinced him more throughout that this bottle has been in the fridge for 16 years - lol!

[Tanaqui]

The older kid spent an entire year telling all their friends they were a year older than they actually are. They. Forgot. How. Old. They. Are.

It took multiple adults, their birth certificate, and a three tries on the calculator to prove to them that they were wrong, and then we had to help them brainstorm how to fix it. (Top answer turned out to be: Pretend you never said you were 15, if any friends ask about it deny, deny, deny. Just gaslight the hell out of all your friends until they drop it.)

[Zoo Keeper]

My six year old is adamant that the wind blows *out of* trees.  All wind.  Because she sees the trees move when it is windy. 🙂

I tried explaining that the wind blows through/around the trees, DH tried explaining, but she's not having it at all.

Correlation apparently does equal causation. 

[TABmom]

My 7 year old just insisted that hair was longer when it was wet than when it was dry. I didn’t bother arguing with him. 

[Guest]

When my son was around 16yo, his best friend went to Peru, where her father was from. She said something like, “Because, you know, it’s summer there now (winter here).” My son 100% a) thought this could not possibly be true and b) insisted that I *never*, in all those years of homeschooling, ever told him such a thing as Southern Hemisphere =opposite seasons. He just insisted that could not possibly be true!

 

This is the same kid who went through a brief time period when he believed the Flat Earth people and was trying to convince me that it was more logical. 

[chocolate-chip chooky]

42 minutes ago, Zoo Keeper said:

My six year old is adamant that the wind blows *out of* trees.  All wind.  Because she sees the trees move when it is windy. 🙂

I tried explaining that the wind blows through/around the trees, DH tried explaining, but she's not having it at all.

Correlation apparently does equal causation. 

This is adorable 🥰

[ikslo]

3 hours ago, Quill said:

When my son was around 16yo, his best friend went to Peru, where her father was from. She said something like, “Because, you know, it’s summer there now (winter here).” My son 100% a) thought this could not possibly be true and b) insisted that I *never*, in all those years of homeschooling, ever told him such a thing as Southern Hemisphere =opposite seasons. He just insisted that could not possibly be true!

I just said to DS15, “You know this, right?” and he had the same reaction.  I stared at him and he continued with his denial and I kept staring until he finally asked, “Wait, is that why birds migrate?”

“You know that the toilets...”  ”I know that, mom, I’m not an idiot!”

😂 teen boys.  Good times.

[Slache]

18 minutes ago, ikslo said:

I just said to DS15, “You know this, right?” and he had the same reaction.  I stared at him and he continued with his denial and I kept staring until he finally asked, “Wait, is that why birds migrate?”

“You know that the toilets...”  ”I know that, mom, I’m not an idiot!”

😂 teen boys.  Good times.

The toilet thing isn't true! Toilets flush whatever way their jets point. They go both directions in both hemispheres. The caloris effect (totally spelled that wrong) is not strong enough to to make a difference in small waters.

[ikslo]

27 minutes ago, Slache said:

The toilet thing isn't true! Toilets flush whatever way their jets point. They go both directions in both hemispheres. The caloris effect (totally spelled that wrong) is not strong enough to to make a difference in small waters.

My point was that he didn’t let me finish before telling me he knew and wasn’t an idiot 😉

Edited December 15, 2021 by ikslo

[Dmmetler]

For what it's worth, back when I was still teaching general music, we had an all city choir concert which included a teacher written "Australia Rondo" which was a rhyming, rhythmic list of trivia, locations and facts (and musically, was pretty much a dud). But, as a result, my choir 5th graders came in quite happy after the state test-because they'd known that seasons were reversed in the Southern Hemisphere, and their classmates who had chosen a different elective during the "club" period, didn't!

 

 

 

 

[Tanaqui]

3 hours ago, Slache said:

The toilet thing isn't true! Toilets flush whatever way their jets point. They go both directions in both hemispheres. The caloris effect (totally spelled that wrong) is not strong enough to to make a difference in small waters.

Coriolis.

It's also not true for sinks. I mean, it *would* be true for sinks if you had a perfectly spherical sink on a perfectly still surface, but since you don't, it's not true for sinks. Those small imperfections and movements have a BIG effect on your small sink.

You only see the Coriolis effect in really huge things, like storm systems and whirlpools and I think twisters.

[SKL]

The other day my kids insisted, to their aunt and grandparents, that I gave them no choice about registering for honors chemistry.

That is 100% untrue.  I asked them.  I reminded them that honors will be more work, but there is a GPA bump (a B is treated like an A).  They both said they wanted honors.  It was their choice!  Ugh.

Just the latest example of a long list of "differently remembered" events ....

(And this sticks in my craw, because I'm pretty sure she's been telling her school counselor etc. that I force her into courses that are too hard for her.  Not fair.)

Edited December 15, 2021 by SKL

[teachermom2834]

20 minutes ago, SKL said:

The other day my kids insisted, to their aunt and grandparents, that I gave them no choice about registering for honors chemistry.

That is 100% untrue.  I asked them.  I reminded them that honors will be more work, but there is a GPA bump (a B is treated like an A).  They both said they wanted honors.  It was their choice!  Ugh.

Just the latest example of a long list of "differently remembered" events ....

(And this sticks in my craw, because I'm pretty sure she's been telling her school counselor etc. that I force her into courses that are too hard for her.  Not fair.)

While my dd's hair gel delusion was comical on one level, it was also a reminder that I am likely up against "differently remembered" events on more serious topics in the future. You are right that it is not fair.

[kirstenhill]

Today, after reading the Beast Academy section about the Pythagorean theorem, DS10 decided he didn't believe it.  "Mom, that can't be right. I think they made this up. A+B=C would make so much more sense.  Why isn't THAT the Pythagorean theorem?"   😁😄😂  It took a lot of skeptical measuring of triangles, before he grudgingly acknowledged that it "works".   But he is now claiming that triangles are broken and whoever made this all up is trying to mess with his brain, because it SHOULD have been A+B=C.   LOL....

[Tanaqui]

SKL, if both kids insisted you gave them no choice maybe the issue is that they felt pressured? Even if of course they had a choice and you didn't intend to pressure them, that might be how they felt. Just one kid might be "whatever, kids are weird" but two may mean you need to be a lot clearer about what you mean about things like this?

Of course, I'm just spitballing here.

[SKL]

1 hour ago, Tanaqui said:

SKL, if both kids insisted you gave them no choice maybe the issue is that they felt pressured? Even if of course they had a choice and you didn't intend to pressure them, that might be how they felt. Just one kid might be "whatever, kids are weird" but two may mean you need to be a lot clearer about what you mean about things like this?

Of course, I'm just spitballing here.

I was clear.

They feed off each other a lot.  It was gang up on Mom time.

One of my kids wasn't even allowed to do honors because her previous teacher didn't recommend her.  She personally chose to go on her school Chromebook and type an email begging her teacher to reconsider.  That was her choice too.  Ultimately she chose to abandon the idea and did not end up in honors chemistry.  Fine!  It was never my idea in the first place.  And FTR that kid is the most strong-willed child I've known.  I don't think she ever did anything in her life just because Mom wanted it.  😛

It's likely that my eldest felt motivated by the fact that her previous teacher recommended her for honors.  But I guess she doesn't remember that.