lmrich Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 Dh and I are so lucky that he still has frequent flier miles. I have found that we have enough to go to Germany this summer. My concern is being gone for 10 days. (it has to be 10 days to get the deal with the miles) My youngest will be on a mission trip for 8 of those 10 days which leaves my middle daugether home alone for those 10 days. She will be 19 and is really responsible. But is that too long? She will have to work this coming summer, but we do not know what her job will be. My parents live three minutes away and will pop over to check on stuff. Our son (21) will be near by and can come over too. Middle daughter has lots of friends - some wild - some who are mild (think knitting and tea drinking) and she swings somewhere in between. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 She is 19. An adult. Unless she has severe medical issues I wouldn't think twice about leaving her home 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustEm Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 At 19, many people are no longer living at home either permanently or while away at college. Assuming she is NT, I'd be concerned if she couldn't handle being alone for ten days. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lmrich Posted January 6, 2018 Author Share Posted January 6, 2018 I know you guys are right. She is perfectly healthy in every way. I am just borrowing trouble - mostly from my mother who made me question my idea. Thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmilyGF Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 My parents left me home to manage a household when I was 16 or 17. They figured I was moving out in a year, anyways. My grandparents lived a mile away. I was responsible for getting my 8 year old brother to school everyday and feeding him dinner. They went to Europe for 14 days. Emily 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sandwalker Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 (edited) Depends upon what you mean by 'wild', and if she can be trusted to live by the house rules while you're away. If so, yes. My Dd, I would have said no to at 19, but ds was fine at 17. Edited January 6, 2018 by Sandwalker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-rap Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 I was comfortable with most of my kids staying alone at that age, except one. For that one, I would have encouraged her to stay at my parents' home, or have her invite a friend to stay with her (one of the mild ones :)). It's nice that your parents and son live so close! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachel Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 At 19 she should be fine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kassia Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 I agree that she'll be fine. Especially with family close by if anything happens. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amira Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 I wouldn’t give it a second thought. Have fun! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ondreeuh Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 We left my ds home alone at 20 while the rest of us were gone for 10 days. We encouraged her to have a (mild) friend stay with her. The house was still standing when we got back. :) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Storygirl Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 (edited) I think you would need to set clear expectations about when she can have friends over and what they can do. Can anyone sleep over? Can she have a party? Is she likely to have a party you would not approve of? Are her friends the type to show up, even if she has not invited them, and expect to take advantage? And is she the type to follow the rules, even when you are not home? I agree that at 19 she is old enough to live alone at college or elsewhere. But there is more to consider when you are leaving her in charge of your home than when she is staying in a dorm. I would have been perfectly fine as far as following rules, but I would not have liked sleeping in the house alone all night at that age. My brother would have loved staying alone at that age, but would not have been trustworthy. So it depends on the individual. Also, if you are asking your parents to proved some limited supervision by checking in, etc., I think they need to feel comfortable with it. Because they would be the first line of help if there were any problems. Edited January 6, 2018 by Storygirl 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 I think this is fine. Like you said, she will be mostly about doing her job, whatever it is. I wouldn’t put anymore social requirements on her than she normally has. If she can have friends over when you are in town, she can have them over when you are away. If she throws reasonable parties when you are in town, she can throw one when you are away if she can meet the reasonable standard. Household responsibilities would be different, beyond the normal “ clean up after yourself,†she would need to take care of pets, plants, mail and make sure the house is locked at night and while she is away. I imagine she will rise to the occasion! I was first alone at the age of sixteen when my parents went to a funeral. I stayed in town due to school. I was also alone in the house several times over the course of my college years for one reason or another. It never occurred to me to change the way I behave just because my parents weren’t around. By that age, net character is pretty well formed and staying alone can help her a like bit further along the road to maturity as she accepts responsibility for herself and the household. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wintermom Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 It sounds fine. Enjoy your trip!!! What a wonderful way to celebrate your anniversary! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted January 6, 2018 Share Posted January 6, 2018 Would not worry me. Since support (other family members) are so close by, they can check in with her. Are you concerned about the "wild" friends coming over? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lmrich Posted January 6, 2018 Author Share Posted January 6, 2018 Thanks. I am not really worried about her. It just feels weird. So many times I thinkg my kids are really 8, 10 and 12. How did we all get so old? She may not water my garden as she hates yard work, but I can get a timer for the sprinkler and all is good! I like the idea of her inviting the mild friend to stay with her. Maybe my dd will learn to knit! Now to plan the trip and keep within budget. :laugh: 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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