jejily Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 I'm a weird mix of extrovert and introvert... like a split personality. I love being with groups of friends, and definitely get "energized" when I'm around people (depending on the people and situation, of course)... but, at the same time, I really like and need alone time. Well, anyway, I have been living in this neighborhood for 2.5 years, and I'm pretty sure they all think I'm a snob or worse, because I don't socialize. I'm not out talking walks with other moms in the neighborhood (like some are), I'm rarely out in our front yard (which is small, compared to the 1/2 acres of our pretty & woodsy back yard), and I don't really like other people's kids -- my own, yes. Others, not so much. So, I used to get invites to all the neighborhood parties -- the Tupperware, the Pampered Chef, the Premiere Design, etc. -- but never went to any. Last night, I realized... I'm no longer getting the invites! My neighbor had one of those home sales parties, and I wasn't invited! :001_huh: Now, I'm thinking -- I should have been friendlier! I don't want to be the neighborhood pariah! At the same time, I'm relieved to not have to turn down the invites anymore! Anyone else like me -- you'd just rather stay cocooned in your own house and yard, not really socialize with the neighborhood moms? Or, do I have a defunct social gene? (And the weird thing is, I really do like hosting parties! Not selling parties, but parties. Get-togethers. For friends and people I know.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommamia Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 :001_smile:Me! I'm right there with you. You described me....when we lived in our last neighborhood. Now we are in the country and I don't have any close neighbors. Sort of a relief. One day I'm an extrovert and then the next I'm an introvert:tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Free Indeed Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 I am not sure how many of us there are, but there are at least 2!! Opps make that 3! :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mama Lynx Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 Funny, I don't remember writing this post. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin Hood Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 We moved into a tract neighborhood and that is exactly how I feel. I want my 2.5 acres back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julpost Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 Yup, me too. Introvert one day, friendly and outgoing the next. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 I want to be friendly on my own terms. And that means turning down "parties" that are really infomercials. But I do walk in the neighborhood (for my own health) and greet the neighbors even if it's just a cheery "hello". I take cookies to new neighbors to introduce myself. I've thought about hosting a neighborhood bbq (potluck) but I'm too busy and so I haven't. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Retired Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 I am also a social misfit. The ladies at church finally stopped inviting me to their parties, shopping trips, and sale shows. I love to talk with them at church and do strike up conversation with strangers. I love people but I do need lots of time to myself. I don't answer the phone while at home. My good friends understand and will email me. I am always willing to help out people in need but just don't do the women's social club thing. I do know a few neighbors but pretty much stay to myself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laylamcb Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 Oh, yeah, I'm so there. As I tell my DH, I want to WANT to have friends and socialize, but...I don't really want to have friends and socialize. Sad, isn't it? For me, the hardest part of being married (to the ultimate extrovert) and having children (why are they so LOUD?!?!) is the lack of QUIET. Makes me C.R.A.Z.Y. after a while. Here's the WEIRDEST thing about me: I'm very uncomfortable in a one-on-one or small group conversation, but I love to perform on stage. That's just whacked. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jejily Posted October 25, 2008 Author Share Posted October 25, 2008 ... Here's the WEIRDEST thing about me: I'm very uncomfortable in a one-on-one or small group conversation, but I love to perform on stage. That's just whacked. That's exactly me! I love public speaking, I speak at women's events, I love teaching large group Bible studies... But I'm not so great at the one-on-one. I'd rather speak to a crowd of thousands than to a crowd of five or six. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Highereducation Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 Count me in on this one, too! I like people, I enjoy spending time with them, but I am very protective of my private time. I don't like going to pocketbooks parties and Pampered Chef parties and all that stuff. I have completely different priorities than many of the women around here - they thrive on the dream of the McMansion, BMW in the driveway, lots of sparkly jewelry, etc. That's not me at all, so I pick and choose what I get involved with and I never feel like I'm missing out. We're hoping to relocate to either Michigan or Indiana in the next year or two, and we're aiming for lots of property. Here in NJ we have 1/3 acre, and it's easy to disappear into the wooded backyard and leave the rest of the world behind, but 2 or 3 acres would be ideal! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laylamcb Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 That's exactly me! I love public speaking, I speak at women's events, I love teaching large group Bible studies... But I'm not so great at the one-on-one. I'd rather speak to a crowd of thousands than to a crowd of five or six. Yes! I'm ready at a moment's notice to give a speech in front of a crowd or even perform a soliloquy on stage in an auditorium. But please don't invite me to a cocktail party for small talk. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caitlinsmom Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 Oh yeah right there with you. :) That is why I love the internet, I can be both at the same time and not worry about leaving my house. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riverfront Headmistress Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 Anyone else like me -- you'd just rather stay cocooned in your own house and yard, not really socialize with the neighborhood moms? Or, do I have a defunct social gene? (And the weird thing is, I really do like hosting parties! Not selling parties, but parties. Get-togethers. For friends and people I know.) We're sisters! Haha. I describe myself as socially awkward. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zelda Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 I'm a weird mix of extrovert and introvert... like a split personality. I love being with groups of friends, and definitely get "energized" when I'm around people (depending on the people and situation, of course)... but, at the same time, I really like and need alone time. Well, anyway, I have been living in this neighborhood for 2.5 years, and I'm pretty sure they all think I'm a snob or worse, because I don't socialize. I'm not out talking walks with other moms in the neighborhood (like some are), I'm rarely out in our front yard (which is small, compared to the 1/2 acres of our pretty & woodsy back yard), and I don't really like other people's kids -- my own, yes. Others, not so much. So, I used to get invites to all the neighborhood parties -- the Tupperware, the Pampered Chef, the Premiere Design, etc. -- but never went to any. Last night, I realized... I'm no longer getting the invites! My neighbor had one of those home sales parties, and I wasn't invited! :001_huh: Now, I'm thinking -- I should have been friendlier! I don't want to be the neighborhood pariah! At the same time, I'm relieved to not have to turn down the invites anymore! Anyone else like me -- you'd just rather stay cocooned in your own house and yard, not really socialize with the neighborhood moms? Or, do I have a defunct social gene? (And the weird thing is, I really do like hosting parties! Not selling parties, but parties. Get-togethers. For friends and people I know.) I think I could have written this except for the part about having a big yard. Mine is tiny. I also don't like hosting parties lately. But otherwise, that's me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lllll Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 No, you're not a social misfit. You just don't like wasting time. I've been to some of these parties. Once I was at a Pampered Chef (?) party and the saleswoman asked me if I liked to cook. I (very honestly) answered 'No!' and about 3/4th's of the other women chimed in and said they didn't either. She looked very pained, but continued. I was never asked to another one. Thank goodness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigdogs29906 Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 I very much belong in this club. :) I am a selective extrovert. I can do it, I am capable, I just choose not to. Shhh! Don't tell. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pam "SFSOM" in TN Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 Or, do I have a defunct social gene? I'm not the one to ask. I got official confirmation of my lack of social skills yesterday. Written, even. :lol::lol: My big kids, on the other hand, are very proud of our, shall we say, non-normal status in life. They celebrate it. They tell me often how happy they are that our family isn't boring or normal. :D From prep school-attending dd's prized t-shirt to the fact that my ds belongs both to a college fraternity and to something called the Dork Club and is very active in both just goes to show you that there's a place for all us weirdos out there. Celebrate it. Don't bewail it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laylamcb Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 I also don't like hosting parties lately. Or EVER, in my case. My sweet 6yo DD asked me the other day if she would ever get to have a birthday party with, y'know, friends and stuff. What do I tell her? "Yes, dear, when you go to live with the gypsies." Or "Yes, dear, when you're 23 and can throw yourself one." :001_huh: :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnTheBrink Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 Oh, I HATE casual chatter, small talk, that sort of thing. I'll be the one at your party in the corner in a deep conversation with someone or sitting alone. I'm not giggly or silly and I usually feel people don't "get" me, and I always feel as if I'm on the outside looking in, even at social events I'm invited to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bkpan Posted October 25, 2008 Share Posted October 25, 2008 I am also a social misfit. The ladies at church finally stopped inviting me to their parties, shopping trips, and sale shows. I love to talk with them at church and do strike up conversation with strangers. I love people but I do need lots of time to myself. I don't answer the phone while at home. My good friends understand and will email me. I am always willing to help out people in need but just don't do the women's social club thing. I do know a few neighbors but pretty much stay to myself. :iagree: Yep, this is me too. Kim Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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