Some of you need to "hang out your shingle"

[musicianmom]

I read the acceptance thread every year with amazement. If you have homeschooled one or more kids through high school who ended up with a full scholarship to their dream school, as far as I'm concerned, you've earned the right to charge money for homeschool consulting. 

 

Anyone interested in doing this? I'll be your first client.

[Angie in VA]

I too am impressed with the list of accomplishments. To think of the wise counsel provided here for free!

 

I still owe a debt of gratitude to Kareni for help when my first born was a senior in high school. Yes, I used some Lee Binz materials too (bought used from a WTMer), but it was Kareni's help that kept me out of a mental institution. Her help made my 2nd child's senior year a breeze. :)

[8filltheheart]

I give free homeschool to college seminars. In April I am switching to a new format. I am doing a divided presentation. The first part will be specific to homeschoolers (planning high school, course descriptions, counselor letters, school profiles, etc), then have a small break, and then continuing with general college application information with public and private school parents joining us.

 

I have considered consulting. I do it now for free. I will continue with friends for free, but if I can figure out the legalities and taxes on it, I may start charging others.

[GoodGrief]

I love giving advice on the topic to those who want it :-) However, I do think for best results (defined as "full scholarship to dream school"...referring to the OP), you have to have a certain kind of kid, and the planning has to start before high school. Only 1 of my 3 kiddos fit in that category, lol. For my other two, we are working with what we've got, and the outcome is just fine (well, that is still to be determined with my youngest free spirit), but probably not full scholarship to dream school. Hopefully a happy and responsible life though :-)

[Sebastian (a lady)]

I'm working on a long range plan for something along those lines. For niw sharing for free.

 

My first two kids were pretty easy and I don't want to assume what worked with them is a model for all. Meanwhile I'm trying to help parents are that high school doesn't have to be faced with fear and trembling.

 

Knowledge is power. Because of that it is worth seeking, and you can't assume everyone will share every good program they know of.

[8filltheheart]

I love giving advice on the topic to those who want it :-) However, I do think for best results (defined as "full scholarship to dream school"...referring to the OP), you have to have a certain kind of kid, and the planning has to start before high school. Only 1 of my 3 kiddos fit in that category, lol. For my other two, we are working with what we've got, and the outcome is just fine (well, that is still to be determined with my youngest free spirit), but probably not full scholarship to dream school. Hopefully a happy and responsible life though :-)

None of my kids have gotten a full-ride scholarship to a dream school bc we don't let them have dream schools. We are far too pragmatic about the process. But, I do have 2 who have/will attend schools they are very happy to attend on full scholarship. We did zero planning before high school. We actually did zero planning at all with college admissions in mind. They are, however, internally motivated kids who are also exceptional in their areas of interest. It is doubtful that my current 9th grader will have a similar outcome. She is a type B personality who just moseys along.

[GoodGrief]

None of my kids have gotten a full-ride scholarship to a dream school bc we don't let them have dream schools. We are far too pragmatic about the process. But, I do have 2 who have/will attend schools they are very happy to attend on full scholarship. We did zero planning before high school. We actually did zero planning at all with college admissions in mind. They are, however, internally motivated kids who are also exceptional in their areas of interest. It is doubtful that my current 9th grader will have a similar outcome. She is a type B personality who just moseys along.

 

My youngest is a type B too...maybe a C, haha. And a very much "in the moment" kind of kid, so definitely no long range planning for her! She's smart and has good grades, but is fine not having good grades too. She's interested in hair and makeup, and maybe she could do something with that. Ideally I would like each kid to have a practical skill they can use to support themselves. Not sure that is happening with my oldest; hers is not that sort of degree. But she had some special challenges too.

 

In the end, you try to advise the kids the best you can. Like someone said above, knowledge is power. Then hope for good things, knowing there will be plenty of bumps along the way.

Edited March 12, 2017 by Gr8lander

[creekland]

I love giving advice on the topic to those who want it :-) However, I do think for best results... you have to have a certain kind of kid...

 

This is absolutely true.  To say it can work for anyone is just plain false.  Perhaps one can force a student to check all the boxes, but when their heart isn't in it, all one is doing is causing needless stress.  Some "top kids" break under the stress when it's not them.  It's sad.  When it is them, holding them back from reaching their potential (not necessarily including "dream" schools but great schools that work for them) carries the same sadness aspect.

 

At school I'll give kids (or parents) advice for no college, cc, state schools, private schools, or tippy top schools all based upon the student.  It's not a cookie cutter deal.

 

I'm not ideal for doing all that for homeschoolers though.  We (personally) didn't need all the stuff many promote (course descriptions, etc).  Others might.  With my data set of two, I hardly consider myself highly qualified.  At school, I see hundreds of kids annually - probably up to 50 wanting advice of some sort in any given year.

[Hoggirl]

My kid's "dream school" didn't/doesn't offer merit scholarships. And, I didn't homeschool all the way through high school. But, I do like sharing advice when asked (ds had two full rides - but neither was to the dream school). The challenge is getting people to believe what you're saying. Often hard stats aren't applicable to their "snowflakes."

[Ann.without.an.e]

I love giving advice on the topic to those who want it :-) However, I do think for best results (defined as "full scholarship to dream school"...referring to the OP), you have to have a certain kind of kid, and the planning has to start before high school. Only 1 of my 3 kiddos fit in that category, lol. For my other two, we are working with what we've got, and the outcome is just fine (well, that is still to be determined with my youngest free spirit), but probably not full scholarship to dream school. Hopefully a happy and responsible life though :-)

 

 

Amen to the certain type of kid.  You can't make a kid "that" kind of student.  DD is in the running for full scholarships at multiple schools right now.  She is that kind of kid.  DS, my next one in line on the college app journey, is not that kind of kid.  DD is the intellectual, loves academics, creative kid with near perfect test scores, amazing leadership opportunities, etc.  I can't make DS that way.  He doesn't have the drive nor the desire and that is ok.  He does have strengths and those strengths, if he plays to them, will be a great asset to his life.  He will not be less in life because he isn't just like DD.  There are great opportunities everywhere for all types of kids.  

[Mom22ns]

I've considered hanging out a shingle, but I prefer to provide assistance when I feel I have something to offer and when I want to. I do those things here. If I hung out a shingle, I'd have to work with people whose experiences don't match ours and at times that were inconvenient to me.

 

We all have shingles hanging here. Ask for help anytime. You'll get the advantage of not one experienced answer, but many!

[Vida Winter]

I have to give credit to Lee Binz for dragging me through my first experience with a homeschool high school graduate. She received a full tuition scholarship at the one and only school she wanted to attend, and I am ever thankful for that, and hope for similar success with our next two kids.

[musicianmom]

*

 

Edited May 21, 2022 by musicianmom

[8filltheheart]

 

I don't plan to let any of my kids get attached to one specific dream school. However, it appears that my oldest child is on track to become exceptional in her area of interest, enough so to get her admitted to some top programs in her area. But that's not going to bring in the scholarship money. I need to figure out what she needs to do to maximize her chances for merit aid, so she doesn't just end up at the local university by default for financial reasons.

To maximize scholarship $$ as of 2017 (things might change in 6 yrs), she needs top standardized test scores; she needs to apply where her stats place her in the top 25% of applicants; she needs to write stellar essays; her accomplishments need to stand out. My kids do not apply to tippy top programs expecting top scholarship $$. They apply to lower ranked schools with top scholarships and specialized programs.

[teachermom2834]

My kid's "dream school" didn't/doesn't offer merit scholarships. And, I didn't homeschool all the way through high school. But, I do like sharing advice when asked (ds had two full rides - but neither was to the dream school). The challenge is getting people to believe what you're saying. Often hard stats aren't applicable to their "snowflakes."

This! I feel like I have researched college admissions and scholarships more than anyone I know IRL but that doesn't mean people want to listen to me. Try telling a mom with a kid at a competitive high school with a 33 ACT and 10 APs that she is unlikely to get into an Ivy. It isn't pretty. It is very difficult for kids and parents that have been tops in their local communities to understand just how competitive it is out there. You can only help people that really want the truth. I have found that many people do not face reality until April of senior year. It is sad really.

 

I like to share my experiences but most people really don't want to hear them. So I mostly share here.

 

(Not that I have super high stat kids. I don't! But I feel like I have a good read on schools for the rest of us :) )

Edited March 14, 2017 by teachermom2834

[poppy]

Dipping a toe in with what I hope isn't an offensive question.... how much does homeschooling have a Tiger Mom subculture vs having an atypical % of 'gifted ' kids ?

 

The (excellent ) advice here could apply to either , really.

 

I don't know a word for tiger mom without negative connotations but I don't mean it negatively .i just mean high priory for academics and achievement vs more common parenting of prioritizing emotional well being (which, of course , has its own pros and cons).

 

My own homeschool kid is 'special needs' , I don't have a dog in this race, I'm just curious .

[creekland]

Amen to the certain type of kid.  You can't make a kid "that" kind of student.  DD is in the running for full scholarships at multiple schools right now.  She is that kind of kid.  DS, my next one in line on the college app journey, is not that kind of kid.  DD is the intellectual, loves academics, creative kid with near perfect test scores, amazing leadership opportunities, etc.  I can't make DS that way.  He doesn't have the drive nor the desire and that is ok.  He does have strengths and those strengths, if he plays to them, will be a great asset to his life.  He will not be less in life because he isn't just like DD.  There are great opportunities everywhere for all types of kids.  

 

Absolutely!  My youngest is not "that kid" and never has been even with a mom who tried to get him closer in that direction.  Yet he's the one who has two standing job offers (upon graduation) already as a junior in college.  There are great opportunities everywhere for all types of kids.  What counts most is actually people skills IME.  Then help guide kids to finding their niches.  My oldest and youngest found theirs during and after college.  They had no idea before, and neither are doing what they thought they would be doing when heading off to college, but both are quite content with their paths.

[8filltheheart]

Dipping a toe in with what I hope isn't an offensive question.... how much does homeschooling have a Tiger Mom subculture vs having an atypical % of 'gifted ' kids ?

 

The (excellent ) advice here could apply to either , really.

 

I don't know a word for tiger mom without negative connotations but I don't mean it negatively .i just mean high priory for academics and achievement vs more common parenting of prioritizing emotional well being (which, of course , has its own pros and cons).

 

My own homeschool kid is 'special needs' , I don't have a dog in this race, I'm just curious .

I am the antithesis of a Tiger Mom. My kids move under their own steam. Some of my kids are extremely high achievers. Some aren't. They all know that we have very limited funds. Finding affordable options for them takes a lot of researching or they have to live at home and commute.

 

Understanding how the system works and how to find schools is the biggest hurdle from my perspective. Too many parents really don't have a good understanding of the college application process, the costs involved, how merit and grant money work, etc. That is why offering workshops covering on the application process and all its steps seems the most beneficial from my perspective.

[regentrude]

Dipping a toe in with what I hope isn't an offensive question.... how much does homeschooling have a Tiger Mom subculture vs having an atypical % of 'gifted ' kids ?

 

I have not met a single homeschooler IRL who has even close to the same academic goals as we do. So I don't see any "Tiger mom" subculture, but rather the contrary.

 

I am an accidental homeschooler and ended up homeschooling my gifted kids because public school did not work for them. I imagine that parents of other gifted children made similar experiences in a school system that marches to the beat of the slowest drummer, so I would expect gifted students to be overrepresented in homeschooling, compared to their percentage of the overall population.

 

[MysteryJen]

This board is its own sub-culture. I haven't met anyone IRL like the people on this board. I am frequently disheartened by the people I do meet, because none of this stuff is rocket science. Know your kid, know their strengths and weaknesses, and go in search of information. Everyone can do this, but very few choose to.

[quark]

I think I was a tiger mom of sorts when I first had my kid. I had all these visions of how he would learn. But all of that came crashing down pretty quickly once reality set in and I realized that while I was a control freak I could not force my kid into anything when his eyes stopped sparkling and grew dim.

 

I cannot take credit for being anything other than facilitator and a fellow-buddy-type-of-mom over a pushy parent mom. My kid could not have gotten to where he is now via pushing. Life has dealt us some serious lessons lately and I realize more now how much of intrinsic motivation he must have to be able to face it all calmly and compassionately with me. And I know that a lot of this comes from my own attitudes towards prioritizing love and laughter over lessons and pressure-cooker hours. The thing is, the more he overcomes, the more humbling this whole experience becomes. The more we realize how much we still don't know, and how much we need our village, our community to progress.

 

I might have gotten somewhat far but I could not have helped my kid achieve all that he has without my people here and in my own local small community.

 

I agree that it's really about knowing your kid, knowing your limitations and knowing when to ask for help.

And I think homeschooling is a journey of keeping both hearts and minds open.

[daijobu]

This! I feel like I have researched college admissions and scholarships more than anyone I know IRL but that doesn't mean people want to listen to me. Try telling a mom with a kid at a competitive high school with a 33 ACT and 10 APs that she is unlikely to get into an Ivy. It isn't pretty. It is very difficult for kids and parents that have been tops in their local communities to understand just how competitive it is out there. You can only help people that really want the truth. I have found that many people do not face reality until April of senior year. It is sad really.

 

 

 

Could you elaborate on this a bit?  What is keeping these sorts of students out of the Ivies?  

[Guest]

Could you elaborate on this a bit? What is keeping these sorts of students out of the Ivies?

It's because the Ivies get a million applications each year with these same sort of statistics. They are a dime a dozen. The Ivies are starting to look at the whole person, looking at what makes them unique, and not just necessarily superb grades and test scores.

Edited March 14, 2017 by Kinsa

[regentrude]

Could you elaborate on this a bit?  What is keeping these sorts of students out of the Ivies?  

 

Statistics.

It is unlikely for anyone to get into an Ivy. A school that rejects 95% of applicants is an extremely long shot - there are plenty of kids with 33ACT and 10 APs. That alone does not make the applicant stand out.

[teachermom2834]

Could you elaborate on this a bit? What is keeping these sorts of students out of the Ivies?

Sheer odds. While these kids are outstanding students there are tons of them. Far more than there are places for in the Ivy League.

[8filltheheart]

Could you elaborate on this a bit? What is keeping these sorts of students out of the Ivies?

It is the intangibles that are getting students admitted. How compelling are their essays? Who are they outside of the classroom? Are they "transformational personalities"? Schools wants students active both in and outside the classroom making an impact on their campuses and the world at large.

 

Fwiw, this is not just the case at Ivies. It is the case across competitive admissions and competitive programs/scholarships. Good grades and test scores means a student passes the threshold for consideration. The "everything else" is what determines acceptan/rejection.

[Ann.without.an.e]

Could you elaborate on this a bit?  What is keeping these sorts of students out of the Ivies?  

 

 

I think others have said it well....they turn away perfect scorers all day long without a second thought.  The amount of applications they receive make it a statistical disadvantage and then keep in mind, usually only the top kids are applying to these schools in the first place, right?  It isn't quite as difficult as winning a large lottery jackpot, but for most kids isn't that far off either  :mellow: