Anxiety, crying, and put daughter back in to preschool

[Janeway]

My husband groaned. But, I spent the night not sleeping. I was crying by morning. I was considering if I should take another anxiety pill. Finally, I went to my husband and told him what was going on and he says "I think it is ok and it will be alright." And I said I wanted to put her back in. What also bothers me is daughter admitted to me this morning that she only wanted to leave so that she can do gymnastics. I am not liking that much. I think she gets way more out of preschool than she will out of gymnastics. She admitted if she could, she would do both.

 

I think what I am going to do is take her to this open gym near by. You can pay a small fee and go to all the open gyms you want and they have open gym for preschoolers. And then, still send her to preschool.

 

I just wish I had a crystal ball to tell me what is right and wrong. I ended up crying and having this big anxiety attack this morning over it. I feel so bad.

[BlsdMama]

I understand wanting, truly, to do what is best for your dd.  But I want to give you a big hug and tell you this:  You are choosing between a good thing and another good thing.  This is like the choice between broccoli and brussel sprouts for dinner.  Both are nutritious, both are good choices, both make you a great mom who is nurturing and nourishing her child.  This is the same.  If it were me?  I'd revel in the extra time, read with her, play with her, there is oodles of time later formal school and I'd stick with what you're doing and visit the choice again in August/September. :)  It is far harder to give homeschooling a year long trial later, kwim?

 

Take comfort in that neither of your choices are bad.  There will be no longlasting ill effects on a 5yo from either of these choices! They're both solid and you can have confidence in either one! (((Hugs)))

[catz]

I understand wanting, truly, to do what is best for your dd.  But I want to give you a big hug and tell you this:  You are choosing between a good thing and another good thing.  This is like the choice between broccoli and brussel sprouts for dinner.  Both are nutritious, both are good choices, both make you a great mom who is nurturing and nourishing her child.  This is the same.  If it were me?  I'd revel in the extra time, read with her, play with her, there is oodles of time later formal school and I'd stick with what you're doing and visit the choice again in August/September. :)  It is far harder to give homeschooling a year long trial later, kwim?

 

Take comfort in that neither of your choices are bad.  There will be no longlasting ill effects on a 5yo from either of these choices! They're both solid and you can have confidence in either one! (((Hugs)))

 

:iagree: This can't be stated better.  You are an engaged and loving parent.  Either choice is a winner.  And if you make one and aren't happy with it?  Well, you can make a change later.  Nothing is written in stone.  :grouphug:

[mommyoffive]

I understand wanting, truly, to do what is best for your dd.  But I want to give you a big hug and tell you this:  You are choosing between a good thing and another good thing.  This is like the choice between broccoli and brussel sprouts for dinner.  Both are nutritious, both are good choices, both make you a great mom who is nurturing and nourishing her child.  This is the same.  If it were me?  I'd revel in the extra time, read with her, play with her, there is oodles of time later formal school and I'd stick with what you're doing and visit the choice again in August/September. :)  It is far harder to give homeschooling a year long trial later, kwim?

 

Take comfort in that neither of your choices are bad.  There will be no longlasting ill effects on a 5yo from either of these choices! They're both solid and you can have confidence in either one! (((Hugs)))

 

So well said.

 

I love when wise moms can come in and give amazing advice.

 

I think cut preschool and sign up for the gymnastics that is close to you.  Problem solved

[SparklyUnicorn]

Don't worry, you will screw it up no matter what.

 

:laugh:

 

I'm kidding.  You are worrying about this too much, but I get it because that's part of the mom job description.  To worry to death over the details.

 

:grouphug:

[ktgrok]

Said gently, are you getting help for your anxiety? Because this isn't a life or death issue, but your brain is acting like it is. That isn't healthy. She's little, she'll be fine either way. You are the one I'm concerned about. 

[freesia]

Don't worry, you will screw it up no matter what.

 

:laugh:

 

I'm kidding. You are worrying about this too much, but I get it because that's part of the mom job description. To worry to death over the details.

 

:grouphug:

lol

Sparkly, you and I think alike!

OP--reread Sparky's post and laugh. Reread the other posts, too. All are so true. She is only little. What works best for you right now? That will be best for your Dd.

 

And, as Katie said, I am more worried about you. Obsessing and having anxiety attacks about this kind of thing I'd always a red flag for me and time for me to evaluate how I am managing my anxiety.

 

Usually when it is something like this about s child who is fine, it means I need to focus on doing something for me and about something other than the kids.

[maize]

Said gently, are you getting help for your anxiety? Because this isn't a life or death issue, but your brain is acting like it is. That isn't healthy. She's little, she'll be fine either way. You are the one I'm concerned about.

I am also concerned about the anxiety you are experiencing. I do not think it is being caused by the circumstances or decisions you need to make--these really are not big deals. But the anxiety is real and is hurting you.

 

Sending hugs; I hope you are able to get some effective help and relief. Anxiety is a beast to deal with at times.

[Terabith]

It also sounds like a really awful preschool. If it were a wonderful school, I would understand the dilemma, but as an early childhood educator, everything you say about it sends up huge red flags.

[Janeway]

I am also concerned about the anxiety you are experiencing. I do not think it is being caused by the circumstances or decisions you need to make--these really are not big deals. But the anxiety is real and is hurting you.

 

Sending hugs; I hope you are able to get some effective help and relief. Anxiety is a beast to deal with at times.

It's everything. That a/c guy I posted about previously, he is STILL trying to get that money! And our a/c does not work, the ducts are damaged so the heat is not going to work either. We are likely to end up in court. And now the thing with the IRS. I assume everything will be worked out with the IRS. It seems to me they are doubling the stock option money. Part of me is sort of worried I messed the taxes up, but I do them the same every year and they did not bring up the other years. Still, even that cost is less than what it will cost to fix our a/c and heating system after what that a/c guy did. Ugh! STRESS!!!! 

 

I just want to be a good mom, but...even my newish Samsung washer has had to have people come out to fix on warranty. Now it is on that recall and the only email I get about it says they are working on a solution. And then that computer that is new (1 yr old) that I mentioned in the other post. 

 

But the a/c is the biggie. It has already cost me tons of time and stress and then in the end, I might be out 20K or so to fix this. IF that guy gets to keep the money I paid originally plus I have to pay to repair what he broke.

Edited October 31, 2016 by Janeway

[SparklyUnicorn]

It's everything. That a/c guy I posted about previously, he is STILL trying to get that money! And our a/c does not work, the ducts are damaged so the heat is not going to work either. We are likely to end up in court. And now the thing with the IRS. I assume everything will be worked out with the IRS. It seems to me they are doubling the stock option money. Part of me is sort of worried I messed the taxes up, but I do them the same every year and they did not bring up the other years. Still, even that cost is less than what it will cost to fix our a/c and heating system after what that a/c guy did. Ugh! STRESS!!!! 

 

I just want to be a good mom, but...even my newish Samsung washer has had to have people come out to fix on warranty. Now it is on that recall and the only email I get about it says they are working on a solution. And then that computer that is new (1 yr old) that I mentioned in the other post. 

 

But the a/c is the biggie. It has already cost me tons of time and stress and then in the end, I might be out 20K or so to fix this. IF that guy gets to keep the money I paid originally plus I have to pay to repair what he broke.

 

Yeah these details tend to feel huge when stressed.  It's like enough already.  Let me have some damn boring downtime. 

[mamiof5]

It's everything. That a/c guy I posted about previously, he is STILL trying to get that money! And our a/c does not work, the ducts are damaged so the heat is not going to work either. We are likely to end up in court. And now the thing with the IRS. I assume everything will be worked out with the IRS. It seems to me they are doubling the stock option money. Part of me is sort of worried I messed the taxes up, but I do them the same every year and they did not bring up the other years. Still, even that cost is less than what it will cost to fix our a/c and heating system after what that a/c guy did. Ugh! STRESS!!!!

 

I just want to be a good mom, but...even my newish Samsung washer has had to have people come out to fix on warranty. Now it is on that recall and the only email I get about it says they are working on a solution. And then that computer that is new (1 yr old) that I mentioned in the other post.

 

But the a/c is the biggie. It has already cost me tons of time and stress and then in the end, I might be out 20K or so to fix this. IF that guy gets to keep the money I paid originally plus I have to pay to repair what he broke.

You have had A LOT going on!! The old "when it rains it pours" can be so overwhelming at times. Yes, each on their own none of this is a life or death issue, but piled they can sure weigh you down.

 

I hope and pray things start getting resolved so your plate doesn't feel overflowing as it is right now.

[Scarlett]

Said gently, are you getting help for your anxiety? Because this isn't a life or death issue, but your brain is acting like it is. That isn't healthy. She's little, she'll be fine either way. You are the one I'm concerned about. 

 

 

Yes this.  Your anxiety seems to be way over the top.

 

I would not put her preschool.  But then I didn't put my son in preschool.  I loved my days of being with him at that age.  Then we added in swimming at age 7 and other things as he grew (along with doing homeschool the entire time) and poof I blinked and now he is 16 1/2 and in Vo-tech half days 5 days a week.  

 

Just enjoy her.  And quit letting her make the decisions.  

[nd293]

Preschool was fabulous for my son. An amazing experience with amazing teachers. I've never regretted it. I've regretted other educational choices, and yes, I think some of them have had long term repercussions (homeschooling and Montessori for a smart but unmotivated child? No no no no no). But I promise, nothing you do at preschool will damage your child. As long as you're not making her really unhappy, choose what works for you.