Kid out of town this summer, how to get him $?

[redsquirrel]

I know nothing about all this 'kid getting older' stuff, lol

 

My son, who will be 16, is going to be in NYC for three weeks at a ballet intensive program.  He is responsible for his expenses while there and I have no idea what I am doing.

 

There are things I know about. He has to take the subway from his dorm to the ballet school and back, 5 times a week. I know he buys a pass. His group has an escort for those sorts of things, and I assume he will get instruction about how to buy his pass from his escort.  I have instructed him not to put too much $$ on his pass b/c he WILL lose the damn thing at least once.

 

He is also responsible for all his food purchases. I really, really don't want to send him down there with a huge amount of cash for three weeks worth of food. It could get lost or stolen or whatever. It could not be enough. This part is fairly mysterious to all of us, and dancers eat like horses. I don't want him to be hungry or skimping on food b/c he is worried about running out of cash.

 

I have a vision, but I don't know if it is possible:

 

Can we get him a debit card, of sorts, where we can access his account and add money to it when necessary. I want him to be able to use it to withdraw cash if needed, use it to buy items when needed, but I don't want the holder of the card to be able to access our bank account...in case he loses it.

 

Speaking of losing things, I guess I need a way to quickly replace the card if he loses that as well.

 

I should add, he's not someone who loses things easily...like...his FATHER....but this will be his first time away from home, first time in the Big City, etc etc. A lot could happen in 3 weeks.

[Tsuga]

Yes, you can get him a debit card with a joint account that you monitor and you both share the online login. 

 

Edited to add: Just make sure that it's not, since NYC is huge, an account that links to credit for overdraft charges.

Edited March 13, 2016 by Tsuga

[Jean in Newcastle]

I agree with Tsuga.  Debit card for a custodial account.  If it requires a pin, then even if he loses the card then others can't access it. 

[redsquirrel]

Yes, you can get him a debit card with a joint account that you monitor and you both share the online login. 

 

Edited to add: Just make sure that it's not, since NYC is huge, an account that links to credit for overdraft charges.

 

Ok, so just go through our credit union I guess. If they let us do that.

 

Or would one of those pre-paid visa things work? I've used a track phone, where you prepay the minutes and keep paying as needed. Can I get a debit card like that? Prob, if it isn't through our credit union, there is huge interest or fees or something....

 

 

Jeepers, the kid is going for 3 weeks and I feel like I am planning a bloody moon landing. Shower caddies, and flip flops, and extra ballet shoes, and how to use a washing machine and money, lots and lots of money.

[Pippen]

This is a great opportunity to set him up with a debit card, tied to a joint account you set up for him. Our credit union has account options for young adults that are easy to set up and for both kids and parent to access.

 

When our kids travel we do always make sure they have some cash to spend. It's been rare when our debit/credit card system has gone down, but I don't want them caught in the event it is. 

 

We've had trouble with some of the prepaid VISA type cards. Sometimes they've worked fine, but other times not when we needed them, so I wouldn't rely solely on those. 

 

[HomeAgain]

Ditto the joint account. We gave our son a checking account when he was 14. From my and dh's logins, we can see and transfer funds into both his checking and savings (and out, if need be). From ds's login, he can see and transfer funds between his two accounts. We have parental controls that allow us to decide if he got a debit card, overdraft, purchase cap..it's very nice. Talk to your bank/credit union about youth checking options.

[yucabird]

I maintain two bank accounts -- same bank -- both with debit cards.  One is my primary account, the other is a secondary/back-up account.  It is easy for me to transfer money from the primary to the secondary and monitor both accounts.          

 

I do this because it is a BEAR to get a new card when you are outside the US, and your card is stolen....but setting up a secondary account might work really well for your situation (just give the kiddo the card attached to the second account, and transfer cash as needed).  

 

 

 

    

[momto10blessings]

Yes, my older kids have checking accounts with debit cards that are linked to my account. I can transfer money to/from their accounts online. Extremely easy. You can even write notes that will show up on statements. I write one for each transfer like "babysitting 3/2" or "mowed lawn 7/7"

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

Personally, I would also get him a credit card as well (one that's linked to your account, not his own). If you really think he might lose the debit card, it's best for him to have a backup. And heaven forbid he does lose the debit card and the account is hacked, it may take a few days to get access to the money in the account again while the bank straightens it out. The backup credit card could cover his needs in the meantime, and if he doesn't need it, he just doesn't use it. 

 

I bill credit cards for a doctor's office, and the majority of the patients live and work in NYC. I cannot tell you how many times a week I have to email people about their cards being dead because they're constantly having fraud issues. IMO, it's way more of a pain to deal with a debit card fraud or loss than a credit card fraud or loss. 

Edited March 13, 2016 by ILiveInFlipFlops

[AK_Mom4]

At 16, we have set each kid up with a checking account at our credit union ( they already had savings accounts). As others said, it comes with a debit card with a pin. We can transfer money into it, but no one who stole the card can use it to access our account. This has been great -our older kids kept them open all thru college and we would just transfer money from college funds to their accounts for each semester.

 

He can use it to get cash at an ATM machine or pay for transportation/food most anywhere.

[Tsuga]

What would a pre-paid debit card be other than a bank account with money in it?

 

What are you looking for that a joint account would not have, I guess is my question. Not trying to be snarky, just want to get an idea of what particular features you want.

[mumto2]

Not sure if this exists in the US but I carry a travel debit card in my wallet that has no personal identification and is preloaded with however much money I want on it. Not tied to any specific account so £200 or whatever is the limit. Everytime I use it dh gets an email immediately saying how much and where spending is occurring and can theoretically top me up if he felt I needed more money. We have the same cards set up for the kids. Easy to use.

 

I admit dh getting the emails freaked me out at first but they have ended up being sort of humerous because he makes some pretty silly assumptions regarding what I am buying......

[Jenny in Florida]

We've handled this in a couple of different ways.

 

When my daughter went to the early entrance program, she was too young to be on any account or regular bank or the credit union had that offered a debit card. So, we set her up with one of those pre-paid debit cards you can find at drug stores. (At the time, we used Visa Buxx, but I believe that particular product has been discontinued.) It costs more in the long run than just having a regular bank account, because it was $5 every time I put money on the card. However, it worked fine. Once a week, I would put log on to the card site and transfer money from our bank account to the card. I got e-mails telling me what she was spending and giving me a running balance, so I could add money more frequently if necessary.

 

By the time my son was getting ready to do his big trip with his choir, our regular bank had begun offering a checking account option for high schoolers. It's tied to our checking account, but has no fees and allows him to have a debit card. 

[AngieW in Texas]

We set up a teen checking account for each of our kids with our bank. The kids each got a debit card. We had access to their accounts online and could easily transfer money from our account to theirs instantly.

 

One thing that you need to be careful of is to send some cash and to inform the bank that your child will be in NYC.

 

My youngest went to NYC for a week-long program this summer. Her card was declined the first time she tried to use it. I had to go to the bank and have them clear transactions from NYC. It had been automatically declined as possible fraud.

 

So send with a debit card, but also send some cash.

[Alessandra]

I think the ideal way is to get son as aa authorized user on a credit card if you are able. That way, the card will have his name on it. I believe that most cards let you set a limit for user that is lower than your limit.

 

A debit card is good to and will work in NYC to buy metro cards. But, at least my experience, card will have your name because it is custodial account. I think that may vary by bank. Ymmv. Check with your bank about whether or not you will get a statement for that card and about whether you have to physically go to bank to put more money in the account. It was different than what I expected, because I do not want or have online access to my accounts, so no online for custodial.

 

A prepaid card is also good. You can register them and report if lost. We get ours from bank, no fees at all. Cards I see in local drugstore have outrageous fees. You cannot use prepaid for Uber and things like that where they don't like anonymity.

 

There are also banks that people here highly recommend that gave special credit cards for minors. I would have to look up an old thread I started last summer to find names. I did not go with this because I did not want to go to a new bank. My bank had something similar, sounded great, but I would have had to set up a credit line, no adding money by going to bank branch. Not a hoop I wanted to jump through for ds. Otherwise, the idea of kid cards with strong parental controls is great.

 

I strongly second the idea of more than one card.

 

My ds loves his Starbucks card, lol. He now has a gold one and gets free stuff periodically. I can add money to it easily. I forget exactly how, just go to my computer, log in and he gets an email with a code.

 

Btw, I tried to get ds a paypal account to use uber, before I went the debit card route. PayPal somehow knew he was a minor, no idea how. So no PayPal.

 

My ds age 15 gets all around NYC, very easy. Public school kids are very independent there. You don't see high school kids getting bussed around the way they are in suburbs.

Edited March 13, 2016 by Alessandra

[redsquirrel]

Thank you all so much!  I knew this was the place to ask about such things. You all gave me some very helpful information and a couple things I never thought of.  Of course he needs a back up credit card. I had forgotten that long ago a friend had told me to get one for my teen and give it to him when he travels. She learned that one the hard way with her teenage daughter. It worked out ok, but things got dodgy, and a credit card could have fixed it in a jiffy.

 

So, we go to our credit union some Saturday morning and talk to them about him opening a joint account etc.  He turns 16 soon, so I think we'll do it once that happens. He will have a learner's permit and finally have some decent ID of his own. And we call our credit card company and get a card with his name or whatever.  We can do that. And I will remember to call both and tell them he will be in NYC.  Or I will have him call, right? And yes, of course I will send him with cash for immediate use

 

What would a pre-paid debit card be other than a bank account with money in it?

 

What are you looking for that a joint account would not have, I guess is my question. Not trying to be snarky, just want to get an idea of what particular features you want.

 

No, not snarky at all. I had some experiences years ago...years...where b/c we have a credit union account there were things that couldn't happen. But, dh reminded me that was a long time ago and a bunch of things have changed with credit unions since then. But, I was worried that the credit union couldn't offer what we wanted. But, people on this thread have mentioned they use a credit union, so I am guessing its not an issue.
 

 

[madteaparty]

You can also deliver him food via fresh direct or seamless web if you are really worried.

He can use his debit card to get or reload his metro card. I think students get a discount, check on that.

Edited March 13, 2016 by madteaparty

[Alessandra]

Wanted to add -- set up a uber account for your Ds. I did that when mine was in DC without me. There are times when public transportation might not be the best choice. It's great to gave as a backup, no cost if you don't use it.

 

Fwiw, I am presuming your son is responsible. My son was ok, but sharpened up when I reminded him that credit could disappear after trip, if he was not careful. I made him/helped draw up a budget beforehand. He google mapped and yelped places to eat, get food, and so on.

 

Recently, for a Boy Scout badge, we got a free app called Wally. It is an expense tracking program. Super simple, cool looking. Ds likes it. You can customize if you wish. It scans your receipts if you wish, put things into categories (you can add or edit categories). There is a you tube video if you like, but also other, unrelated apps called Wally. :-(

 

Sending my kid off last year at age 15 to a new city was a great leap forward. He was used to NYC, but going to another city -- he used the Bolt bus -- gave him new confidence.

 

Good luck to your son!

[GailV]

 

 

Jeepers, the kid is going for 3 weeks and I feel like I am planning a bloody moon landing. Shower caddies, and flip flops, and extra ballet shoes, and how to use a washing machine and money, lots and lots of money.

 

Nothing to add but to say that's one of the reasons intensives are so awesome -- they get you started sorting things out for college, or taking a year abroad, or whatnot.