Alana in Canada Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 and can't leave the house (at all) nor get away from the kids? What do you do? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommylawyer Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 Your children are old enough that you can probably leave them alone for a few minutes to take a nice hot shower or relaxing bubble bath. If you are feeling so overwhelmed that you need to cry (that's how I get it out, so to speak, I cry), then cry while you're in the bath or shower. After that, just stay in your jammies, cuddle up on the sofa with your kids, and watch a nice family-friendly movie - or wait until the kids go to bed and watch a movie you would really enjoy. Good luck! I hope you don't feel overwhelmed and can't escape for long. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 Your children are old enough that you can probably leave them alone for a few minutes to take a nice hot shower or relaxing bubble bath. If you are feeling so overwhelmed that you need to cry (that's how I get it out, so to speak, I cry), then cry while you're in the bath or shower. Done this many times. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Philothea Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 After an ugly explosion... I shut down for a bit and do what I would most like to do. Ignoring the problem doesn't make it go away, but it does make it seem not-so-important when I deal with it again. Sometimes, taking a nap helps a lot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
threetreasurs Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 I used to go outside! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennW in SoCal Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 Stop doing everything, pop some popcorn and watch a good movie. If it's a really bad day, add a glass of wine and a blankie to cuddle under (and don't share the blankie -- the kids can get their own!!) If its an extra bad day, let the kids watch a movie of their choice, close yourself off in another room with instructions to not be disturbed unless it is a life threatening situation. Let them have popcorn and chocolate milk for dinner and don't let yourself care about the lack of nutrition for the day. Put them to bed early. Eat chocolate and don't share. Hide in a closet with the chocolate if you have to!! Desperate times call for desperate measures! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen500 Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 I put in a video for the kids and take a nice shower. They don't watch much tv anyways. I get them into bed earlier- at least the older ones are happy to read in their bedroom til lights out. I need an hour or two of time in the evening before I go to bed w/o constant kid interaction, or else I get really grumpy. Hope you're feeling better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clwcain Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 We keep ice cream and chocolate on hand for just such emergencies. And my wife calls me to kvetch. We run through the things that are overwhelming her, and then she launches a new assault at existential oppression with renewed vigor. Me, I go hide in my office or bedroom and read or sleep. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greta Lea Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 Then I'd take a long bath or shower and watch a movie in my bedroom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom2legomaniacs Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 Mine are 7 and 10. They are old enough to handle themselves without my constant presence. I can go off in my bedroom with instructions for them to do something like watch a video while I recharge by taking a nice bath or sitting and knitting. I shut down when things get to be too much. I am honest with my kids about needing time so I can deal. Good lessons for them to learn, I think. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alana in Canada Posted September 12, 2008 Author Share Posted September 12, 2008 Thank you. Just reading about these things is helpful. I've already taken several deep breaths. I think dh is working late again tonight which means I'll have to take my son to his Tae kwon Do, then get dinner, then do the bath and bed thing. Meanwhile, I need to connect a new printer and do lots and lots and lots of housework (I've been unable to fin things all day without lifting the piles, kwim? and it's a major strssor). Actually, honestly, I'll probably just make more piles and fret. (keyboard keys which do not respond when pressed is another stressor, too). I AM exhausted--I definitely need more sleep than I'm getting. Blast. We're only in week 4, day 4. This week we fell behind, just one or two things but it is a slippery slope. I get to feeling like this and soon the kids aren't doing anything school related because I feel like I can't cope. I'm only telling you all this because that has been the pattern in the past and I CAN"T ALLOW IT TO CONTINUE--but I don't know what to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dawn of ns Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 You mean besides crawl under the desk and cry? :D I go have a nap. That's pretty much it. I plug a movie into the VCR or DVD player for the kids and sleep. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pianoplayer Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 1. Go in the bathroom and cry. :) 2. Call dh (who is always calm and cool-headed, bless his heart) and talk out the problem. This pretty much always helps! As we talk about whatever happened, my emotions begin to drain away, and together we identify solutions to the problem(s). 3. Address the problem head-on (especially if it relates to attitude problems, ignoring instruction, etc.), and then tell everyone that we are going to take a big, deep breath and start all over. FWIW, most of the times that I feel overwhelmed are when I am trying to deal with multiple problems that have gotten all knotted together. Sorting out the tangled strands, so to speak, goes a long way to helping me figure out how to deal with the separate issues involved. :grouphug:Hang in there! I have a feeling that, were we to take a poll on this, most all of us would admit to feeling overwhelmed on a regular basis, so you are not alone in this!:D Take care, and I hope you find the answers you need.:grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caitlinsmom Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 I put the baby down for a nap, turn on a long movie (1hr or longer) for the other two, and grab a book for myself. Reading always relaxes me and helps me get back to where I need to be. Or I send them outside to play and call my sister to vent, then pick up the book. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kls126s Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 Personally, I sleep. Too much. It just compounds the problem, but sometimes it's just how I cope. I will add that I was in the DMV yesterday renewing my drivers license and the young lady that was helping me was commenting on my two children sitting quietly and waiting. She said she had 2yo and was expecting her second, and had such a bad day the day before that she actually cried. She said this like she was surprised. LOL I told her that all moms have days like that and that being a mommy is hard. I also told her that those two sweet children sitting and waiting so patiently were just in the car having a knock down drag out fight about whose turn it was to sit on which side of the back seat. :glare: Appearances can be deceiving. And I think when we are feeling overwhelmed, we can even deceive ourselves. I think we have to have enough grace for ourselves to do what we need to stay healthy, in all senses. And sometimes that means exactly what these other posters have suggested - put a movie in, take a nap, call your spouse and whine, or whatever helps you cope. It's normal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LG Gone Wild Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 After an ugly explosion... I shut down for a bit and do what I would most like to do. Ignoring the problem doesn't make it go away, but it does make it seem not-so-important when I deal with it again. Sometimes, taking a nap helps a lot. :iagree: I send the kids to a room or if they really need it, with a spanking. Or if it is just that they are bouncing off the walls, they go outside or watch TV. Either way, I just shut down and eat something naughty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 One of the reasons I school year around is that sometimes you need a catch-up week. No, it isn't a break as such. It is a week where you don't start a new week's work but go back and pick up all the loose ends that are bugging you from the weeks before. (I know, some people manage to get it all done but you mentioned falling behind like I do.) So on Monday you would finish up day 5 of week 4 and then on Tuesday you would grade papers and have the kids correct anything they had to correct. And on Wed. you would start work on all those piles - and make the kids help you. Call it Filing 101. You can say it comes under the community service heading - or maybe that of vocational education (you are studying business careers this week!) Then on Thursday you clean the house. And then on Friday you all go out for a fun field trip! Then the next week you start in again renewed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alana in Canada Posted September 12, 2008 Author Share Posted September 12, 2008 Bless you all. I think you are al giving me permission to ignore the house, right? And planning school for tomorrow and next week, too? (For now.) My daughter wanted a friend over (it's after ps school time now) and I said OK (even though, technically, we haven't done our cience because they foot dragged all day) and she is behind in both reading and grammar But it's been that way all week and this is one sociable kid. So, I said OK: as long as you stay in your room and play quietly! Husband called back (I can't call him) and said he'd be home on time to take the boy to TKD. whew. The boy is watching a DVD with headphones and I am now going to curl up on the couch and sleep. I hope. Unless the dog barks. Did I mentined the dog? Anyway, thank you all. PS> I am not illiterate. Did I mention the keyboard? errgh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeanestMomInMidwest Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 I thought that was why God invented alcohol....and SWB invented this board...no? Maybe not best to mix the two....especially with keyboard problems already! I told dh today that I am the worst hs mom ever! Maybe something is in the air today. He said, no, our kids just have short attention spans (I ended up finishing everyone's art project). Now I've banished them from the basement and am typing in the dark....hoping they won't find me....dh is going to the movie store in a few minutes...wine chilling in fridge....waiting for attitude (mine) to improve. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dawn of ns Posted September 12, 2008 Share Posted September 12, 2008 cry, complain, get online, drink a beer I'm not sure these are the best solutions. LOL You're right! The best solution is a dozen beer. :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heather in the Kootenays Posted September 13, 2008 Share Posted September 13, 2008 A movie for them and a nap for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted September 13, 2008 Share Posted September 13, 2008 I wanted to mention one more suggestion: take a walk - we have a park nearby. I will drop off my dc and then will keep walking! I just go around the block and check on them each time I come back to the park. Or we go for a walk and I make them walk about 15 paces in front of me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WTMindy Posted September 13, 2008 Share Posted September 13, 2008 and can't leave the house (at all) nor get away from the kids? What do you do? Send the kids to their rooms and close the doors and read or cry or take a bath or something relaxing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer3141 Posted September 13, 2008 Share Posted September 13, 2008 buble baths classic films or a good chick-flick, depending upon my mood (Ms. Pettigrew Lives For a Day was great!) chocolate good wine bake bread home spa stuff - give yourself a facial and a pedicure! call a friend and laugh my butt off Jen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted September 13, 2008 Share Posted September 13, 2008 Get on the boards of course! I try to take the kids outside for a while, or turn on music and dance with them. Or pick up a cat and breath in the scent. It depends, if I am in sensory overload a different tactic would be needed. My failsafe strategy is www.tapping.com. No harm in trying. I have calmed asthma attacks with this. EDIT: I just saw the beer suggestion. This has made our household much more peaceful on some days. Not everyday though!;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kanga Posted September 13, 2008 Share Posted September 13, 2008 and can't leave the house (at all) nor get away from the kids? What do you do? Make a bowl of mocha chocolate frosting. It can be spread on graham crackers or eaten straight from the bowl. You can also use it to bribe dc. Mocha Chocolate frosting: 6 T butter (melted) 6 T coffee (the liquid kind, already made, not grounds!) 6 T cocoa 1 t vanilla 4 C powdered sugar Combine all ingredients with mixer until smooth. Serves: One stressed Mama Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peela Posted September 13, 2008 Share Posted September 13, 2008 my husband has always been pretty good at seeing how high my stress meter is running, and insisting I change something, go to my room, stop trying to be super mum, whatever. Sounds like your dh senses he needs to make sure he steps in. You know, your kids doesn't HAVE to go to Tai Kwan Do every single night. No activity should be a prison when mum is overtired and overwhelmed. The kids can cope with a night off a regular activity. Your house doesn't HAVE to be cleaned right now. I often feel much more like doing chores after I have had a nap or a good night's sleep. I am much better about putting myself as a higher priority than I used to be, so that my energy levels stay high enough to have plenty of joy in my life. Sometimes that means everyone makes themselves cereal for dinner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweetpeach Posted September 13, 2008 Share Posted September 13, 2008 Stop doing everything, pop some popcorn and watch a good movie. If it's a really bad day, add a glass of wine and a blankie to cuddle under (and don't share the blankie -- the kids can get their own!!) If its an extra bad day, let the kids watch a movie of their choice, close yourself off in another room with instructions to not be disturbed unless it is a life threatening situation. Let them have popcorn and chocolate milk for dinner and don't let yourself care about the lack of nutrition for the day. Put them to bed early. Eat chocolate and don't share. Hide in a closet with the chocolate if you have to!! Desperate times call for desperate measures! I agree with all of this - and I tell my kids not to talk to me under any circumstances, unless it's Red White or Blue. Bloody, broken or bruised - otherwise, LEAVE ME ALONE! There is nothing more serious in our household than a "Mommy Time Out." Hell hath no fury like a hs'ing mother who's been pushed to the crazy fringe in mid-February. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Rat Posted September 13, 2008 Share Posted September 13, 2008 I play a game on the computer for 30 minutes. Tetris-like games. I find zoning out and mindlessly watching tiles drop, etc gets me out of my funk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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