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help me brainstorm: meals for someone who is caregiving?


Halftime Hope
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My brother and SIL are the caregivers for my 82 year old dad.  He fell outside a relative's house on Friday morning and broke his arm (above the elbow) and hurt his hip, too.  Right now he is pretty much immobilized, whether it is stiffness or an actual hip injury only time will tell.  His arm is in a sling; no cast yet, so he's having to be *very* careful--sleeping in the lazy boy because he's afraid of hurting himself in bed.  They have medical equipment from my mom, so I'm sure they'll get him fixed up so he doesn't have walk to the potty and such, but the way his arm is broken, he can't use crutches for the sore or injured hip, even if needed.

 

This is going to put tremendous strain on my sweet SIL.  My bro has a 4 hour daily commute (NoVa), and his work hours are long, too.

 

I live nearly 1400 miles away.

 

If I wanted to help with meals, how would you suggest I do it?  Restaurant gift cards come to mind, but any other new-fangled services that I'm not aware of?

 

TIA

 

 

 

 

 

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I agree on a maid service if it is financially feasible and something your SIL would welcome. If you know (or can find out) their favorite take-out/delivery places, then sending a handful of gift cards would be awesome. Can you get a visiting nurse (if they don't already have this) to help with his bathing, etc, for this period?

 

Also, I think you should consider hopping on a plane and going out for 5-10 days (depending on your ability to do so, your kids' ages, etc) and pitch in in real life for a bit. While you are there, your brother and SIL can get some personal time while you take over Dad's care, and you can bring a handful of recipes and spend an afternoon or two stocking their freezer with some home cooked meals. Really, this is huge. I am the caregiver for my mom, and we've only been doing this for (almost) a year, and I can tell you that you need to BE THERE, especially at this moment. If your brother didn't exist (or was an ass), you'd do this, as you'd have gotten the call and had no choice but to hop on a plane. Since he and SIL are there, you've had the chance to plan a bit, get your head together . . . and now, you can hop on a plane. If not this week, then next week, as this is going to take a while. Really. Do it. You won't regret it. 

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Can we re-focus on meal suggestions?  What I need to know is if there are any "services" that deliver decent meals, or other food ideas.  Thanks.

 

I can ask whether maid service is needed, but she has two great, capable teens.  Having a personal aide come in is something I told them I'd support them on, but that is something they are going to have to talk through with my dad. 

 

My life is on hold as I wait for a surgery date (it's not an elective thing, it's medically necessary) and it has been postponed--out of my control--far longer than I should have had to wait.  At the moment, traveling is not an option.

 

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Our city has a restaurant delivery service. Even if the restaurant doesn't normally deliver, this service will.

 

More economically, there are options for Meals on Wheels and $3/meals from a local grocery store through the Council on Aging.

 

I would call the local group who coordinates elderly services for his area and see what local options exist.

 

He likely needs something already hot or easily reheatable...but also nutritious.

 

Another option is local grocery store delivery of things like microwaveable meals, fruit, and prebagged salad.

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Check Amazon Fresh. They deliver groceries and items from local shops, plus restaurants. It's not in all areas, but you can check by entering the zip code. You could send a pre-paid card such as Amex or (I think) an Amazon card to pay.

 

Thinking outside the box, and I'm not sure what your budget is, but you can find personal chefs who come in once/week having done the shopping and cook and freeze meals for the entire week. Maybe a couple of weeks of a service like this?

 

My other ideas have already been listed.

 

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Honeybaked Ham has a lot of different meal choices that can be delivered. You could do a variety of meals in one shot that way? They are mostly things that just have to be heated. They have both main dishes and sides.

I second Honeybaked Ham. It's not just for holidays. Dh's office sent a full meal after dd died, and it was wonderfully easy to just microwave portions on a plate. It was like being blessed with instant leftovers.

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