parents, are you aware of this??

[SparklyUnicorn]

And articles?  What about all the articles I could link to about clergy abusing children over the years?  Parents should NEVER EVER NEVER trust clergy with their children because we know bad things happen by clergy.  So any one of them is a potential pedophile and should be treated with distrust no matter what.

 

I don't actually feel that way, but you can't deny that anymore than I can deny bad things can be found on the Internet.

 

 

[Guest]

I think the restriction is appropriate at a young age, but I think that the conversation has to be about values and so on because it isn't that many years between 10 and 18...and there's a lot of ground to cover.  If kids don't learn to make values-based decisions when they are tweens/teens, they will learn it when the consequences are larger.

 

My son got exposed to porn at Scouts.  We were both values-discussing people and somewhat restricted, and it still happened in a trusted environment.  When we found out about it, and that he had gone a-looking on his own, his response was so beautiful...that he didn't want to look at it any more because he didn't want to have to confess THAT again to the priest.  He had already done what we would have instructed him to do.  

 

Here's something that I'll bet gets some blowback, but this is what I believe:  I think that the delta between what is appropriate for adults and what is appropriate for teens is a lot smaller than people think it is.  I'm pretty sure that it's not a great idea for adults to be stuffing their brains with things that are "inappropriate for teens"...  As a matter of fact, I have pretty strong restrictions on my own iPhone, and our router is set so that porn and other crap doesn't get through.  I've missed a few YouTubes that I'm sure were really pretty OK, and so on...but my life is really  not harmed by that.  Once my son understood that I wasn't setting his iPhone restrictions any different from my own, a lot of the argument went away.  

 

And it's pretty hard to tell a kid not to waste his life on the computer when I'm doing enough of that myself.  :0/  

 

Rambling Rose here.  

[Laura Corin]

This paragraph jumped out at me:

 

In Dr. Manning’s view, pornography should not be taken lightly. “It’s not something you dabble in for a few years and then clean up your act before you get married. This will handicap your ability to be intimate in marriage. If you desire a satisfying sexual experience with a spouse someday, this is a surefire, fast-track way to ruin that.†- See more at: http://www.salvomag.com/new/articles/salvo9/9segelstein.php#sthash.uUqZ3YQf.dpuf

 

Every boy that I knew of my generation looked at porn, and a fair few of the girls.  I really haven't heard of a lifelong handicap from the experience.  

 

I do understand that there are some pretty extreme things out there, and I wouldn't want my children seeking out porn (we have computers in public places only and no smart phones until they go to university) but I think that this view is extreme.

 

L

[Ausmumof3]

I think the restriction is appropriate at a young age, but I think that the conversation has

Here's something that I'll bet gets some blowback, but this is what I believe: I think that the delta between what is appropriate for adults and what is appropriate for teens is a lot smaller than people think it is. I'm pretty sure that it's not a great idea for adults to be stuffing their brains with things that are "inappropriate for teens"... As a matter of fact, I have pretty strong restrictions on my own iPhone, and our router is set so that porn and other crap doesn't get through. I've missed a few YouTubes that I'm sure were really pretty OK, and so on...but my life is really not harmed by that. Once my son understood that I wasn't setting his iPhone restrictions any different from my own, a lot of the argument went away.

 

And it's pretty hard to tell a kid not to waste his life on the computer when I'm doing enough of that myself. :0/

 

Rambling Rose here.

This is sooo true. Whenever I feel like my kids are taking too much screen time I take a look at my own habits ...

[StaceyinLA]

My experience with this is that our family was always deemed the liberal home schoolers in our group. My kids had a fair amount of freedom compared to a lot of the other families. I have also always talked to my kids a LOT. My kids have certainly not been perfect, but several of the most conservative families' sons were involved in a massive scandal which included drugs, theft and pornography. These families were extreme in their practices at home and didn't let their kids out of their sight at any functions. When the sons went to college, all hell broke loose.

 

These boys have all been in prison, and one is still very messed up. The other two seem to finally have their lives on a better track.

 

Isolating kids from everything doesn't always work.

[katilac]

One patient is struggling with same sex attraction but firmly believes he is straight? 

 

You keep using that word. I do no think it means what you think it means. 

[candicane]

I grew up with computers, sort of. My first desktop (that wasn't a fake toy one) that had internet was when I was in elementary school. I still remember the dial up and being kicked off because of the phone. I never had any restrictions as to what I could/couldn't do or how long I could use the computer. I didn't know what bad websites were, and maybe that's why. Regardless, I grew up having most of my life centered around the internet. It gave me a love of computers and for a short time it was what I was hoping to major in in college. Heck, I remember going out of my way in school to use proxies to get around the controls they had, I would have done that at home too if I had to.

Anyways, I get that some parents want restrictions, but I never had any for computers, TV (aside from not being allowed to watch Rugrats), or a cell phone. Nothing bad happened to me, thankfully.

[ChocolateReignRemix]

Porn? On the interwebs???

*fans face*

Unbelievable!

[MomatHWTK]

OP,

I think *most* of the users of this forum are internet savy and even if they restrict screen time for their children are pretty aware of what the internet is and what it contains.  It is a little odd that your initial post made it seem as if this was new information.  Next we'll be seeing a post about how National Geographic has pictures of 'nekkid' people.  KWIM? 

 

However, you are correct that some parents either aren't informed or don't follow up. 

 

Regardless of the environment in which one's child is placed, parents still have to parent.  Part of that is being aware of the dangers and educating our children on how to avoid them and what to do when faced with a moral dilemma.  The full armor of God requires information and faith to make good decisions. 

 

In your own circumstances, if you really weren't aware of the various risks prior to reading the article that you posted, then it is time that you and your DH both get educated.  The world of technology and communication changes so quickly now that by the time you read about a danger, there are dozens of new ones that have popped up.  There is no time for complacency.  Whatever your standards, morals or beliefs, you  need to communicate them clearly, wisely and often.  At the same time, you as parents need to watch the news, read the papers and listen to the kids in your sphere so that you know what is happening in the world. 

 

I do like to keep my kids in a bit of a bubble, I don't necessarily want them to know about every evil in the world just yet. But I consider it my responsibility to know what is on the outside and prepare my children for it. 

[Jennifer3141]

Porn on the internet? Where?!? :huh:

 

I'm confused as to why the article was even posted. And as we've seen with every societal problem with young kids, abstinence doesn't work. Ask Sarah Palin how that worked for Bristol. :laugh:

[maize]

I also am in the camp of those who say teach children to navigate the world of the internet as a tool while they are under my roof and guidance. I do not want them to grow up without technological knowledge and skills.

 

That said I am quite surprised by the number of people who have made a comparison between internet porn and playboy. I do hope those of you making such a comparison are aware that what is available on the internet goes far, far beyond what you or your friends might have seen as kids in someone's playboy magazine.

[Farrar]

I also am in the camp of those who say teach children to navigate the world of the internet as a tool while they are under my roof and guidance. I do not want them to grow up without technological knowledge and skills.

 

That said I am quite surprised by the number of people who have made a comparison between internet porn and playboy. I do hope those of you making such a comparison are aware that what is available on the internet goes far, far beyond what you or your friends might have seen as kids in someone's playboy magazine.

 

I'm also aware that it's different. It's difficult to have a conversation about this sometimes. I believe that at the right age (not, say, 10, for example...) seeing naked bodies and the sort of p*rn that many of us all saw as kids hidden in parental bedrooms or perhaps accessed in the earlier days of the internet is really not a big deal, not harmful in the long run, part of normal curiosity and development. And I don't have a problem with older teens and adults who view that sort of thing in moderation. Or read 50 Shades of Gray for that matter. Whatever. Fantasies are fine. There are much, much darker, weirder, violent and strange things out there online now. Many people think all of it is equally "evil" and harmful. I agree that taking the view that p*rn is no big deal these days - which might have been fine circa 1985 - is naive.

[SparklyUnicorn]

I'm aware it's different.  The comparison for me wasn't between types of porn, but between access pre-internet and access post-internet. Although having said that, Playboy in 1979 introduced me to some pretty lewd acts!

 

I think the problem is over-stated for children. None of us at my house have ever 'accidentally' happened upon porn. A busty lady maybe, once or twice. It doesn't seem to seek us out, kwim ?

 

Deliberate accessing of porn on the internet is more likely to be an issue. And you deal with that, to some extent, by education and frank discussion.

 

Hey once porn showed up on TWTM for goodness sakes.  Probably more than once. 

[SKL]

Of course I am aware that magazines are different from videos.  (Playboy, by the way, is the most tame of the magazines in that genre.  There is much more raunchy stuff out there and my brothers could have described it to you by Jr. High.)

 

Point is, parents have always had a responsibility to teach their kids not only that porn is not OK, but also what to do if they encounter it.  It is part of parenting, period.

 

That said, I've spent a lot of time surfing the internet and I never accidentally opened porn.  (Nor have I done so on purpose.  I have zero interest.)

 

On the other hand.  We had a house visitor (in his 30s at least - married with kids) whose permanent residence was in a Muslim country at that time.  You could be killed if caught accessing porn there.  We gave him use of our computer while he was here, to do some "work."  After he left, we found a notebook he accidentally left behind next to the computer.  It was full of internet addresses that were obviously porn sites.  Hmm.  Not sure what that says about limiting access to internet porn in order to save our society's morals.

[Tanaqui]

My goodness. Are you telling us that there are dirty pictures on the internet? Why, I had no idea!

 

Snark aside, I remember reading that every new technology has been used for porn pretty early. The printing press, film, the internet - it's all the same. It may be true that The Internet Is For Porn,  but then, so are most things made by humans. Something so universal is probably not universally harmful to consumers thereof... although I say that while acknowledging that there is huge exploitation of sex workers within (and not!) the porn industry and that in our society much of it is  explicitly misogynistic.

 

We can say "I don't want my young child viewing this by accident" or "I want my young adult to understand the problems inherent in this" without having a full-fledged panic attack over letting kids use the internet.